words in movies
CHANDLER: Yeah, we were gonna give fifty, but if you guys gave more, we don't wanna look bad.
MONICA: Oh, actually this year we just made him homemade cookies.
ROSS: How 'bout from now on we just call it the 'unfortunate incident'? [Rachel walks off] Hey Gunther, you got stairs in your place?
PHOEBE: Ya know, in all the years that we have been grandmother and granddaughter, you have never lied to me.
MONICA: Well, maybe the mailman liked the cookies, we just didn't give him enough.
RACHEL: [on phone] Hi, Mr. Treeger. Hi, it's Rachel Green from upstairs. Yes, somebody, uh, broke our knob on the radiator and it's really hot in here. Yes, it's, it's hot enough to bake cookies. Well, do you think we could have a new one by 6? Wha t, no, no, Tuesday, we can't wait until Tuesday, we're having a party tonight.
MONICA: Hey, we could have used that kind of thinkin' earlier.
Monica: Oh my God! We love that show! I mean Ross and I have been watching it since I can remember!
The Man In The Sportscar: How hot are we? (He drives off.)
Ross: Pheebs, I think shes great. Okay? Were going out again.
Phoebe: Oh right, yeah okay, my Mom could, and I cant. We dont have that....
Phoebe: I�m starving. I know we were coming here tonight, I ate nothing all day.
Chandler: We used them as pillows when we went camping.
Chandler: Eh, forget about the future and stuff! So we only have two kids, yknow? Well pick our favorite and that one will get to go to college.
All: Ohh! Were kidding! Oh, were kidding!
Joey: Hey, best man number two, Joey Tribbiani. Now Im not good with the jokes like Chandler here. Boy...but ahh, I just want to say congratulation to the happy couple. I first met Ross in this coffee house back home...Home...New York City...Where everybody knows my name. Well anyway, I love you guys. (pointing at everyone.) But not as much as I love America. (Looking at Chandler.) Could we please..go home now?
Ross: Ah, yeah, yeah. Umm, we started talking after she y'know, did her thing. And it turns out she's got a boy about Ben's age, so we're taking them to a gym-boree class. Why, is that okay?
Rachel: (shakes her head) I guess... Oh, I just had such an idea of what this day would be like, you know? Emma laughing and everybody gathered around her cake singing "Happy Birthday". Then we would all go into... HEY GET OUT OF THE ROAD YOU STUPID STUDENT DRIVER!!! (honks furiously, and Ross looks at her in disbelief and Rachel looks at him.) They have to learn!
Ross: (interrupting him) YeahNo-but-but-but-but! Were just gonna go home and take a shower. Now, thats not scary right?
Chandler: Okay, heres the thing. Were gonna get you some coffee and they will never know that youre drunk.
Chandler: Daddy. All right look, heres the story. (Flashback to Chandler about to enter the steam room as he does the voice-over.) Well, we had just finished playing racquetball and we were gonna take a steam. I walk into the steam room and it was really steamy. (The flashback shows his glasses fog up and him trying to find his way around the steam filled room. He takes off his glasses.) So I take off my glasses and thats when in happened.
Rachel: Yeah. What kind of discount do we get?
Ross: Yeah. Yeah, it really was. But we we gotta be careful. We we cant let that happen again, yknow?
Phoebe: Oh, I believe it. I think the baby can totally hear everything. I can show you. Look, this will seem a little weird, but you put your head inside this turkey, and then we'll all talk, and you'll hear everything we say.
Rachel: Well, there is one thing that we havent tried, but someone thinks that, (mimicking Ross) "That will open up a can of worms."
Monica: Oh really? Okay, let's compare, shall we.
CHANDLER: Well, we haven't exactly met, we just stayed up all night talking on the internet.
Alice: Right, not just that. Umm, even though we love each other as much as we do, none the less
Chandler: What are you talking about? We love Schhteve! Schhteve was schhexy!.. Sorry.
Joey: Yes, but y'know what? It doesn't matter who knows what. Now, enough of us know that we can just tell them that we know! Then all the lying and the secrets would finally be over!
Susan: No shouting, but we still need a name for this little guy.
Phoebe: Okay, maybe it was a trick question. (Plays a few chords) Um, Rachel can we do this now?
[Flashback scene: We cut back to the 80's party. Rachel and Monica are "dancing".]
Joey: And while were down at the video store, you know what else we could rent? Die Hard! (Chandlers excited.) Oh, yknow what? I just remembered, that Everest thing is only available through mail order.
Ross: Were having a baby.
PHOEBE: Maybe that's because you haven't taken the time to get to know him. Let's remedy that, shall we?
Joey: It's called Shutter Speed, it's really cool! Yeah, umm, I meet this girl in the subway and we fall in love in like a day, right? And then, she disappears But I find out where she lives and when I get there this like old lady answers the door and I say, "Where's Betsy?" Right? And she says, "Betsy's been dead for 10 years."
Joey: All right, here we go. (He grabs them and starts to pull them out of the apartment.)
Rachel: Yeah actually, I think were gonna take off too. We rented a movie.
Chandler: We share a wall! So either hes great in bed, or she just likes to agree with him a lot.
Rachel: Ross, this is not how we wanted you to find out about this. You have every right to go nuts.
Joey: (entering) Hey. (Ross turns to see who it is, and seeing its Joey he just ignores him and turns back around.) Ross, I know youre pissed at me, but we have to talk about this.
Chandler: Okay, I guess we can lose to junior high girls some other time.
ROSS: [puts the message in the cupboard] I don't know, I don't get, I don't get it, I mean, wh, wh, two months ago Rachel and I were like, this close. Right now, what, I'm takin messages from guys she, she meets at the movies? I mean this, this Casey should be takin' down my messages, ya know, or, or, Rachel and I should be together and, and we should get some kind of me, message service.
Rachel: You remember when we got these?
Mr. Waltham: Weve come for her things.
Joey: Okay, here we go. Ready?
Phoebe: Yeah. We don't speak. She's like this high-powered, driven career type.
JOEY: How do we say yes now and make it seem like we're not doin' it just to ride in the cool car?
Rachel: Hello! Here we go!
Phoebe: Hello, tiny embryos. Well, Im-Im Phoebe Buffay, hi! Im-Im-Im hoping to be your uterus for the next nine months. You should know, that were doing this for Frank and Alice, who you know, youve been there! Umm, yknow they want you so much, so when you guys get in there, really grab on. Okay, and-and I promise that Ill keep you safe and warm until youre ready to have them take you home, so Oh! And also, umm next time you see me, Im screaming, dont worry, thats whats supposed to happen.
Phoebe: (gasps) Ohh, okay maybe they put your picture back up they can put you next to Matt Lauer. Look at him, smiling at me. (Giggles) Yeah I know; wed be great together!
Ross: Okay, well, well call the company that sent her!
Chandler: But we dont do that.
Rachel: How do you know that? What if it just gets worse and worse and worse, to the point where we cant even be in the same room with each other?!
Ross: That does not sound stupid to me. You know, it's like the first time I had to make dinner for myself, after Carol left me? (the buzzer on the washer goes off) I'm sorry, that's all the time we have. Next on Ross...(opens up the washer) Uh-oh.
CHANDLER: We have to assign heads to something.
Rachel: Okay, here we go. (Pushes play.)
Joey: Oh what, wait, wait a second, I mean, what are we doing? Whos going with who?
Rachel: Okay, now make it even, cause we dont...
Chandler: Yeah. Yeah, I mean what, what would we do?
Doctor: Oh my. Were gonna need to take you straight to the delivery room.
Ross: We got honourable mention in the brother/sister dance category! Look, its almost fake midnight, do we really have any other choice?
Phoebe: We did! We violated Section 12 Paragraph 7 of the criminal code!
Eric: Oh no, stay here well keep doing this. Ill pay you.
Monica: (to Chandler) Oh, honey, can you make sure we get a King size bed!
Rachel: (motioning to a rack) So now, these are all the tuxedos that we make and if theres anything that you like, we can make you a deal. Anything at all. (Grabs a few) But these are the three that Monica pre-approved.
Ross: Uh, good news everyone, we finally found a nanny. This is Molly (points to Molly). Molly, Chandler, Joey.
Rachel: No, Monica! Monica! We have to fix this!
Joey: So when do we get to meet the guy?
Ross: And when we were dating we consummated like bunnies!
Monica: We should go.
Phoebe: So, what? Monica, we have the winning ticket! My psychic said I was gonna win, remember?
Monica: Hello! Were we at the same table? It's like... cocktails in Appalachia.
Chandler: Well, can we help?! You want us to take you back to the house?!
Phoebe: Oh, I took Larry there to eat but it was all violated. So we shut it down!
Monica: Dont worry about it Phoebe, well absolutely do it.
Phoebe: Ok. We can, um, we can burn the stuff they gave us.
(We see Ross and Bonnie laughing and having a good time.)
Susan: Oh, well, is it what we thought it would be?
Jay Leno: (on TV) Folks, when we come back we'll be talking about her new book, 'Euphoria Unbound': the always interesting Nora Tyler Bing. You might wanna put the kids to bed for this one.
Phoebe: The donation we made earlier, we k…, we w…, we want it back.
Mr. Burgin: Well just grab some food and take it with us right upstairs, and well be right out of you hair.
[Cut to another part of the building. We see Marcel jump in through a window and run down some stairs, then Chandler and Joey come down from the upper floor without noticing.]
Joey: Yeah, Chandler finds me so intimdating that its better if were on the same team.
Amy: You know what? When I moved in here I thought: This is gonna be so great. Just us sisters, back together again like when we were kids, except without that stupid Jill... Oh! Who has gotten fat by the way...
David: We enjoy watching each other. And I settle for watching each others performance, and we like each other.
Chandler: We still have porn.
Ross: So I guess were back to uh, Baby Girl.
Chandler: (shocked at the news) Why cant I tell them that we live together?
Chandler: Yeah, why don't we lose the gloves.
Chandler: Okay, okay, so we get to take that stupid troll thing home!
Phoebe: Well, we cannot tell Joey about this. He's already flipping out about everything that's changing. This will push him over the edge.
Chandler: Hey! Do we have a baby name yet?
Ross: Yay! (To Carol) Seriously, our sex life I was thinking, maybe I dont know, we could try some-some new things. Yknow? For fun?
Joey: Uh, we stars just try to eat right and get lots of exercise.
Phoebe: Okay, so we got some more good rejections, lots of stuff to work on.
Ross: It'll be nice to get this off finally, won't it? Yes it will. (Marcel resists) Or we can leave it on for now, that's fine.
Monica: (singing) Well be waiting for you
Rachel: And here we have the last of Paulo's grappa.
Monica: Its so good, that I feel really selfish about being the only one whos eating it, that I think we should have everyone taste how good it is. Especially Ross.
Phoebe: But, its not like were losing anything. Y'know?
MNCA: We are talking about Rachel here. You and Rachel.
Monica: We havent eaten yet!
Rachel: Well yeah, I do, but I decided to take a long lunch and spend some time with my friend Monica. Y'know I-I feel that we don't talk anymore. How are you? What is new with you?
Monica: We are there!
Ross: Did she (points at Amy) do this to her? I told you we shouldn't have left Emma with her!