words in movies
Stripper: So which one of you lucky boys is Chandler?
Chandler: Which is why you should do it.
Mike: So...? What do you think? (looks at his parents, which look in disgust)
Phoebe: Yeah, oh Im sorry, it must be really hard to hear! I tell ya, its a lot easier having three babies play Bringing in the Noise, Bringing in da Funk on your bladder! Im so sick of being pregnant! The only happiness I get is from a cup of coffee, which of course is decaf, causeOh! Im pregnant!
Rachel: And you know which one we should see? The 1996 Tony award winner. Do you happen to know the name of that one?
Rachel: (as Monica) Yeah it is, mostly because I get to boss people around, which I just love to do.
Phoebe: No Dr. Skeptismo! Im sure. First of all, okay, theres the feeling. (Chandler shrugs) Okay, and for another, how about the fact that she went into my guitar case which is lined with orange felt. (Rachel nods her head in unsure agreement) My Mothers favourite fish is Orange Roughy... (Joey thinks he understands, but then nods that he has no clue.) Cats....like....fish! (Ross and Rachel are totally lost) (to the cat) Hi, Mommy. (Rachel covers her mouth, in an Oh my God. gesture) Oh, I havent seen this smile in 17 years!
Chandler: (to Richards date) And uh, you dont have a mustache which is good. (She just smiles.) Im Chandler; I make jokes when Im uncomfortable.
(Chandler has a basketball which he is moving closer to, then away from, Monica)
Monica: (gets up and gasps) Oh my God! Rachel!! (Rachel is stunned to see that her long lost friend is still fat.) (Monica goes over and gives Rachel a big bear hug, which is quite easy for her.) You look terrific!
[Scene: Lamaze class, Ross is again on the floor, cradled in Susans lap, but now Carol is cradled in his lap, and she has a pretend baby, on her lap. The teacher is showing her class a video, which is about to end.]
ROSS: Naa. A while ago I got a sah out of him, which I thought, ya know, might turn into sah-condary caregiver but... Hey, would you uh, would you hold him for a sec, 'cause I, I gotta take this off.
Chandler: Finally, I figure I'd better answer it, and it turns out it's my mother, which is very-very weird, because- she never calls me!
Chandler: Seriously? Seriously, no! You can play your own age which is 31!
Rachel: (sitting at a table with some of her friends) (to waitress) Oh, um, no, no, no, no excuse me, hello. Hi. My friend ordered an onion, not an olive, and uh I ordered a rum and Diet Coke, which I dont think this is.
[The camera cuts to show the couch, which has been cut in half.]
Nurse: Now, which of you is the father? (Points to Joey and Ross)
Ross: And; people thinking its huge has led Monica to believe that we are stealing her thunder. (To Monica) Which we are not!
Chandler: Im gonna say this for the last time. Would you please just (He moves his arm which opens the drawer and hits in the back of the head, which proves his point.)
Rachel: Yeah, which, by the way Chandler, I would like back one of these days.
Joey: I have an audition for this play and for some of it I have to speak French. Which, according to my résumé, I'm fluent in.
All you want is a dingle, What you envy's a schwang, A thing through which you can tinkle, Or play with, or simply let hang...
Rachel: Okay, fine. Gunther, y'know what, I am a terrible waitress, do you know why Im a terrible waitress? Because, I dont care. I dont care. I dont care which pot is regular and which pot is decaf, I dont care where the tray spot is, I just dont care, this is not what I want to do. So I dont think I should do it anymore. Im gonna give you my weeks notice.
[Scene: Chandler is packing the broken china in its box. He's taping up the top of box so thoroughly, there isn't an inch of cardboard which isn't covered in tape. He is struggling with the tape dispenser.]
ROSS: Oh, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry. Sorry. Sorry! Hey! Hey! I got my s's back! Which we can celebrate later. Celebrate.
Monica: Wait. He pooped in my shoe? Which one?
Phoebe: Oh, which museum?
MONICA: Ok, which one of us do you think is gonna be the first one to get married?
Mrs. Green: Oh no-no-no-no sweetheart, you stay put. Ill let myself out. Its like Im not here, which I almost wasnt.
Ross: (on phone) Yeah Ill press 1! (Presses one which allows Rachel to escape.)
Margha: Well, if I had to chose right now, which by the way I find really weird, I would have to say, Chandler.
Joey: Which part exactly?
Joey: Look, which one of us is gonna be having sex in there, me or you?
(He goes and sits down next to Rachel and puts a cigarette in his mouth, which Rachel takes away from him. He puts another cigarette in his mouth, and Rachel takes it away again.)
PHOEBE: No. No, he is my submaring guy. He resurfaces like every couple years and we have the most amazing three days together. Only this time he's coming for two weeks. Two whole weeks, which means yay.
Ross: Then we have to await the data from recent MRI scans and DNA testing which call into question information gathered from years of simple carbon dating.
Phoebe: Oh sure! (She goes to take her feet off, but drags the sheet with her which spills the wine.) Noo!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is playing living room golf as Rachel enters. Rachel sees this and holds the door open until Chandler is ready to start his swing, when he is, she slams the door shut which causes the club to fly from his hands. He turns around, shocked.]
Monica: (wary) Okay. So, which boxes are mine?
Rachel: Its a trifle. Its got all of these layers. First theres a layer of ladyfingers, then a layer of jam, then custard, which I made from scratch. [Joey and Ross make impressed faces] Then raspberries, more ladyfingers, then beef saut�ed with peas and onions, [Joey and Ross look like somethings wrong.] then a little more custard, and then bananas, and then I just put some whipped cream on top!
Rachel: No, so I dont have to get married until Im 33! Thats three years, thats three whole yearsOh, wait a minute though. Ill need a year and a half to plan the wedding, and Id like to know the guy for a year, year and a half before we get engaged Which means I need to meet the guy by the time Im thirty.
Joey: Which is why I waited until now to introduce you to Mike.
[Scene: The Philly, With or Without You is playing. (Which is the same song Ross played for Rachel in TOW the List.)]
Monica: Please... Chandler is the love of my life... (At which point a man in leather pants walks by)... oooh leather pants! Have Mercy! (Follows the man in the leather)
Phoebe: Which you just gave up really quickly.
Rachel: Oh-oh-oh, which one is Bonnie again?
(Phoebe joins Chandler on the couch as there is a knock on the door which Monica answers.)
Mike: Because I was told I'd get a free dinner, which I didn't. And that I'd meet a pretty girl. Which I did.
Monica: So if everyone liked it, and you liked it, that would make this a success. Which would make you
[Rachel, in her bridesmaid dress, complete with hat, which makes her look like Little Bo Peep, and Ross enter]
ROSS: Ross, uh and uh, I'd just like to say that it did take a lot of courage for Rachel to come here tonight. And, uh, for the record she did not run out on Barry because she had syphilis. (da-doom-chesh) (to drummer) What are you doing I'm serious. Uh, the reason she walked out on, on Barry is simply that she didn't love him, which incidentally worked out pretty well for me (looks for the da-doom-chesh, and doesn't get one) Cheers.
Cecilia: Which one? Was it bald or was it tall?
Monica: Which one?
Ross: It was pretty funny when I, when I hid it for a while, huh? Anyway, umm, I-I am worried about that bathing suit, not because its revealing which Im fine with, no Im concerned about your health, sun exposure.
Joey: Which one, they all suck!
(Phoebe and Rachel both pause, look at each other, and go press their breasts against him. Which Joey doesnt mind, of course.)
JOEY: Huh? Never really thought about the writers. The scripts just kinda come to my house. But you know what? This makes me look good, which makes the show look good, which makes the writers look good so how could they be mad about that?
Rachel: Hey, Mon, if you were hoping to sleep with Joshua the first time tonight, which one of these would you want to be wearing. (Shes holding two frilly, lace nighties.)
Phoebe: Me taking care of you is no problem, huh? You guys feel safe. Right? Okay, Im gonna take that spit bubble as, "Yeah, I do!" Okay, after I get rid of this dirty diaper Leslie, Ill set you up with a clean one. (She throws it at the garbage without looking, misses, and knocks over a vase and flowers, which fall to the floor and break.) Okay, Im sorry. I didnt mean to scare you. I just have to clean that up. Okay? Cause lets face it, were at Monicas. (She crawls over, disposes of the diaper, picks up the flowers, and the vase.) I broke it. All right. Well, thats just the way that goes. (She throws out both the flowers and the vase.) Okay, good. (She turns around and only counts two babies.) Why are there only two of you? Where is Leslie? Well, you cant answer. (She starts looking for her) Leslie? Where are you Leslie? Leslie, now would be a good time for your first words! (She turns around and finds that Leslie has managed to crawl into the bottom drawer of the TV cabinet.) Well, look at you! Hey! You are a little bit mischievous! My gosh! (She picks her up and notices a surprise is waiting in the drawer.) Oh, youre a lot mischievous! Well, itll dry. (Closes the drawer with her foot.) (To Leslie) Okay, you sit with your brother and sister nowwho arent there! (They both have disappeared as well.)
Monica: Which one is which again?
Mrs. Geller: Can we talk to you for just a yknow Its just a little thing. Well we think its absolutely marvelous that youre having this baby out of wedlock, some of our friends are less open-minded. Which is why weve told them all that youre married.
Phoebe: So! Ross doesnt really decorate his tree with floss, but you dont hear him complaining do you? God! (Phoebe hits her guitar which wakes up Ross with a start.)
(There's a knock on the door which is answered by Phoebe.)
Ross: Which... which... which... Which one is it?
Jack: Which one are you?
Rachel: Oh, ok, which one?
(Oh, I should point out that the live studio audience at this point goes absolutely wild. And I had absolutely no idea that this Will character was that popular! Maybe they should make him the seventh friend. Which would work out just fine since hes already married to one of them. Will is played by some guy named Brad Pitt, I guess hes some sort of actor.)
Luisa: (Out of shot) Here, monkey. Here, monkey! Here, monkey! (Marcel runs to the door and into Luisa's cage, which she slams shut) Gotcha.
Rachel: Which one do you think she is?
Chandler: I know, just quick-quick question, quick question. Which one was Deep Impact and which one was Armageddon?
Ross: Really? Which one?
Phoebe: Oh my God! I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Which one's Demi Moore?
Joey: What the?! (Joey pounds the table and starts yelling at Rachel, and which is drowned out by applause. Rachel is desperately trying to tell Joey that hes on TV right now. He finally notices and he does his gracious loser face.)
(Ross continues to climb down. He puts his other foot further down on Joeys torso, but that doesnt work very well and hes forced to wrap his legs around Joey. Which then forces Joey to get a nice and close view of Rosss crotch.)
Ross: Fine! Its your life! (Starts to storm out mad about his failed attempt at the manipulation of his best friend and sister, but stops and tries one last time.) I just dont want to see you guys break up! Which you will do if you move in together, (Monica and Chandler just stare at him.) but thats what you want, theres nothing I can do. (Opens the door and tries one more time.) DONT DO IT!!!!! (Finally leaves.)
Phoebe: What?! You can't separate them! That's terrible. Which one?
Chandler: Y'know, I can't believe I'm getting my nails done! And you said it was gonna be fun! (pause) Which it kinda is. Also, you said there would be other guys here. There are no other guys here!
Phoebe: Tomato tart and which of the pastas would you recommend?
Chandler: Which technically now you should give back!
Joey: No! (She nods no to Chandler) Because he didn't believe in my movie! Which is a big mistake because it is real! Real!
(Rachel looks shocked, gets over it, notices she's alone, and picks up the phone. The last part of which is something she shouldn't have done, because the phone is already in use. By Monica, and now Rachel can hear every word.)
Monica: All right, big brother. (holds up two erm revealing articles of clothing) Which of these do you think would make your little sister look hotter, so your best friend would want to do her?
(Ross continues to climb down. He puts his other foot further down on Joeys torso, but that doesnt work very well and hes forced to wrap his legs around Joey. Which then forces Joey to get a nice and close view of Rosss crotch.)
Monica: Youre right. I mean Im sorry. Yeah, I shouldnt be laughing. I should be laying down papers for you! (Runs off laughing which gets Chandler laughing.)
Ross: (entering from the bedroom) Hey, what's goin' on? (Pats Chandler on the shoulder which causes him to jump.)
Kim: I don't know which one, but I do know I need a cigarette. So what do you say we take a break, we go outside, and we'll figure this out when we come back?
Rachel: Yeah! You and that girl from that copy place, which yesterday you took full responsibility for!!
Monica: So anyway, I'm cooking dinner for him Monday night. You know, kind of like an audition. And Phoebe, he really wants you to be here, which will be great for me because then you can 'ooh' and 'ahh' and make yummy noises.
Rachel: Hey-hey, yknow what? I dont care! Im not ashamed of my book. Theres nothing with a woman enjoying a little erotica. Its just a healthy expression of female sexuality, which by the way, you will never understand. (She goes into her room.)
The Salesman: So, what do you say, Joey? You get the whole set of encyclopedias for twelve hundred dollars, which works out to just 50 bucks a book!
PHOEBE: Just, you know, long time ago. Well, when men used to tell women what to do - a lot. And then there was suffrage, which is a good thing but is sounds horrible. Do you want to get this tattoo?
Chandler: Yeah, Joe, I assure you if I'm staring down the barrel of a gun, I'm pretty much peeing every which way.
Ross: (does so) Oohh, 23. (Rachel looks at him.) Which is what we play to at this casino! You win 10 dollars! (Holds out a ten.)
Phoebe: Because patience is the road to understanding (she thinks) which ... is the key... to a happy heart.
Rachel: Pheebs, I would make a reservation for five, because one of us has to stay home and watch Emma. (to Ross:) Which one of us should go to dinner?
Chandler: Which, by the way, is the real San Francisco treat. (Calls her, then hurriedly hangs up.) I got her machine.
[Flashback to: A street, Ross is sitting in his newly purchased MGB. Which is one of the better British sports cars ever made. Of course, better is a relative term. Which reminds me of a joke. Why dont the British make computers? Because they couldnt figure out how to make them leak oil. Anyway, the gang is all staring at his new purchase.]
Chandler: (joining them) Hey! Which ones my turkey burger?
Joey: Yeah. Sorry about that. (He walks away and knocks on the next door which is answered by a little girl.) Oh, hey little girl. Uhh, is-is your mommy, or sister, or babysitter by any chance a hot girl?
{Transcribers Note: She puts the key into the ignition, which is on the left side of the steering wheel. Does anyone know why that is? Its a tradition left over from Porsches racing history. The worlds greatest endurance race is the 24 Hours of LeMans. Which is in France and runs for 24 hours straight from noon on Saturday through the dark of night and finishes at noon on Sunday. In the 60s LeMans had a unique start where the drivers would actually start the race outside of the car and across the track. At the start of the race, the drivers would run across the track, get in the car, buckle up, start the car, and drive off. Porsche wanted to reduce the amount of time that took. Since all cars to that point had the ignition switches on the right side of the steering wheel, that required the drivers to use their right hand to grab the seat-belts, put the car in gear and start it. The drivers left hand did nothing. Porsche in order to save a few seconds in a 24-hour race; moved the ignition switches to the left side of the steering wheel so that the driver could start the car with his left hand while grabbing the seat-belts with his right hand. Thats why every Porsche car built since then has the ignition on the left side of the steering wheel.}
Rachel: No, but they stuck me in personal shopping. Which is just a huge step down!
Monica: Okay? (To a different group) Over here we have pink suede, which is nice. But umm, if it gets wet then you know its gonna shrink.