words in movies
Chandler: Shhh, busy beaming with pride.
Mrs. Bing: (on TV) ...This is kind of embarrassing, but occasionally after I've been intimate with a man...
[Scene: The Hospital, it's a montage of Monica and Phoebe's visit to the hospital with My Guy playing in the background. It starts with Monica reading a newspaper to him.]
Mrs. Bing: Oh, please, honey, listen, if I can do it, anybody can. You just start with half a dozen European cities, throw in thirty euphemisms for male genitalia, and bam! You have got yourself a book.
Mrs. Bing: What is with you tonight?
Mrs. Bing: She's supposed to be with you.
Ross: The girl on the cover with her nipples showing?
Mrs. Bing: No. Because I know how to write men that women fall in love with. Believe me, I cannot sell a Paolo. People will not turn three hundred twenty-five pages for a Paolo. C'mon, the guy's a secondary character, a, y'know, complication you eventually kill off.
Ross: The guy on the cover with his nipples showing?
[Scene: Hospital. Phoebe is there stroking Coma Guy's hair, when Monica enters with a bunch of balloons.]
Chandler: I spent the entire day with you, why didn't you tell me?!
Chandler: Y'know, of all my friends, no-one knows the crap I go through with my mom more than you.
Phoebe: (Walks up with her guitar) Hey Rach.
Phoebe: Thanks. Hi, um, 'kay. I'd like to start with a song that's about a man that I recently met, who's, um, come to be very important to me. (Monica gives her a look) 'Kay. (Sung:)
Chandler: That would be no. Look, just because you played tonsil tennis with my mom doesn't mean you know her. Alright? Trust me, you can't talk to her.
Phoebe: Alright, whadyou do with him?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's Chandler is talking with his mom.]
Joey: Then she came back with "The question is, when are you gonna grow up and realise I have a bomb?"
Ross: Wait, did you get to the part about his 'huge throbbing pens'? Tell ya, you don't wanna be around when he starts writing with those!
PHOEBE: Please, I almost fell for that with, uh, Pride of the Yankees, I thought I was gonna see a film about Yankee pride and then, boom, the guy gets Lou Gehrig's disease.
Chandler: (with a quivering voice) No, Im not!
Monica: Oh, the way you crushed Mike at ping pong was such a turn-on.You wanna...? (plays with her finger on Chandlers chest)
Phoebe: Oh, she's that work of art I made, you know, with the woman coming out of the frame.
Monica: Wow! Wow! And its definitely all gone? Theres nothing there to work with? (Joey glares at her.) What were you thinking?
Phoebe: Hey Joey, want come with me to… are you ok?
Monica: Uh, so, uh, Rach, uh... do you wanna save this wrapping paper, I mean, it's only a little bit torn... so are you gonna go for it with Ross or should I just throw it out?
Monica: (goes to Chandler) Phoebe and Rachel saw you with Nancy today and... em... they think you're having an affair.
RACHEL: Yeah, who's gonna eat all our food, and tie up our phone lines, and - is that my bra? What the hell you doin' with my bra?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is playing Hide-and-Go-Seek with the chick and the duck.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Ross are there, Phoebe is entering with her date Robert.]
Young Ethan: No, don't say it. (closes Monica's mouth with his hand)
Rachel: Well, believe it or not, it's true. When Joey and I were together, he was wonderful. He was thoughtful and mature. And for the one week that we went out, he didn't sleep with anybody else!
Chandler: Okay, she is the star of the play. And she is my girlfriend! I get to have sex with the star of the play!
[Scene: Monica's apartment, Chandler walks in with a friend of his while Monica is putting fruit in a bowl.]
[Scene: The Hospital, Mr. and Mrs. Geller are there, along with Aunt Lillian. Ross and Monica enter and everyone says hi and kisses.)
Rachel: No! Put that box down! We are not going anywhere! This is my apartment and I like it! This is a girls apartment! That is a boys apartment, its dirty and it smells. This is pretty. Its-its so pretty! And look, and its-its purple! And Im telling you, you with the steady hand, I am not moving, and now I have got the steady hand. (She holds out her hand, which is shaking uncontrollably.)
Monica: Wow, being dumped by you obviously agrees with her.
Sarah: (approaching with two filled balloons in her hands) Nobody! We put them in here! (Indicates the aforementioned balloons causing both of them to scream in delight and start drinking from the balloons.)
Ross: Monica, what is the matter with you?
Phoebe: Sven I don't understand what you're saying! What is wrong with the flowers? Lorkins? What the hell are lorkins?
Ross: Marcel! Where are you going with that disc?
Joey: Ho-ho-ho, (pausing for a rest next to the fridge) fried stuff with cheese!
Monica: Ok, um, I'll go with you.
Phoebe: Okay, lesson one: chords. Now, I don't know the actual names of the chords but umm, I-I-I made up names for the way my hand looks while I'm doing them. (She starts to show Joey the chords. Transcribers Note: For this one you'll have to use your imagination, 'cause it would take me 50 pages to describe each one. So if you want to see them, you'll have to wait for this episode to come to a TV near you.) (Holding up her hand and then reconfiguring her hand with each name.) So then, this is Bear Claw. Okay, umm, Turkey Leg and Old Lady. (Joey tries to imitate them.)
Phoebe: (looking in the window) Right, oh yeah. Wow, oh, it looks like Ross is breaking up with her. Uff, I hope he lets her down easy. Lets go.
Ross: Yeah, Im missing out on all this other stuff, too. So, Joey suggested Rachel move in with me.
Joey: Yeah, are you just going down there to gawk at that hot girl with the belly button ring again?
Katie: You were so funny with that waiter! You're such a nut! (She slaps her thighs, Joey jerks, and spills some of his coffee.)
Rachel: Ross, you had sex with another woman!
[Scene: A Chinese Restaurant, Ross is there with his date.]
Monica: Well, sure, what with it being her funeral and all.
Joanna: (to Rachel) So ah, whats wrong with him?
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is there as Jill enters to start her date with Ross.]
Ross: Hmm -you know, actually this'll work out well. Cause when you have to move back in with Joey, Joey's hot new roommate can come and live with me.
CHANDLER: I broke up with her.
CAROL: [enters with Susan] Hello
Monica: (entering with Chandler) Who? (She looks out the window at Rosss apartment) Is that your sister?
Joey: Well Im not proud of this, but (He turns around and starts to mess with his eyelids.)
Chandler: (to Janice) Okay. (to Joey) Joey, trade lives with me!
Monica: (looks around) Well, with all these doctors and nurses, Im gonna say, midget rodeo.
Rachel: Well IThats never gonna happen with Ross.
Monica: Something went wrong with Underdog, and they couldn't get his head to inflate. So anyway, um, his head is like flopping down Broadway, right, and I'm just thinking... how inappropriate this is. Um, I've got something in my eye, uh, Joey, could we check it in the light, please?
Phoebe: Yes, 'cause now I have to go down there, and deal with them.
Rachel: (starting to move closer to him) Thats right, I wanna do it with you! Ive been trying to fight it, but you just said all the right things.
Chandler: See, I'm finding out all this stuff about you today, like you like the Law & Order and that you flirted with every guy in the Tri-State area!
Policeman: Its Petty. (He grabs Rosss license.) Ill be right back with your ticket. (Walks back to his car.)
Monica: OK, we done with the chit-chat? Are we ready to play some serious poker?
Chandler: (to his children) Look around, you guys. This was your first home. And it was a happy place, filled with love and laughter. But more important, because of rent control, it was a friggin' steal!
[Cut to the hallway where Phoebe is conferring with Rachel.]
[a stranger enters with flowers]
Chandler: Yes, yes I did, but what I didn't say was what I was about to say, what I wanted to say was, uh... would you like to go out with me sometime, thankyou, goodnight. (He walks back to the others but she calls him back.)
Ross: Well, because y'know there are certain rules about this kind of stuff. You don't uh, you don't fool around with your uh, friend's ex-girlfriends or possible girlfriends or girls they're related to.
Chandler: (picking up the telephone, answering it with a frog in his throat) Hello? (he clears his throat, but he still has the same frog in his throat when he speaks again) Hello?
[Cut to Chandler opening the door to his and Joeys apartment to reveal Monica standing there with a turkey on her head in The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks.]
Phoebe: Hey you guys, I dont mean to make things worse, but umm, I dont want to live with Rachel anymore.
Stranger: Just be honest with her.
[Time lapse, Ross has been demoted to the back seat with Joey and Chandler. He's not too happy about it.]
Joey: I knew he couldn't be with a woman for 45 minutes!!
[Scene: Ross and Rachel are at the playground with Emma. Rachel in putting her back in the stroller and Ross is tending to his wound]
Mr. Geller: I thought he was with you.
Joey: The hell with hockey, let's all do that!
Joey: Done with the bookcase!
PHOEBE: OK, I wasn't in love with him and I was just helping out a friend.
(Rachel stops dead in her tracks when she sees whom Joey is with.)
Joey: listen to this... I went out with this girl last night and half way through our date I realized I already slept with her.
Monica: All right, so I havent cleared the budget with my parents yet, but tell me how this is for music.
Dr. Baldhara: Does he, uh, fight with other animals?
Monica: Oh, please, stop! Look, we're supposed to be honest with each other. I-I just wish you could tell mejust say, "I don't like your massages."
Monica: Do you think breaking up with him was a huge mistake?
JOEY: Ah, I was just in the bathroom, and there's mirrors on both sides of you. So when you're in there it's like you're peein' with the Rockettes.
Richard: Well yeah, Im sorry. I know this is the wrong time and the wrong place but I had to tell ya! I wanna spend my life with you. I wanna marry you. I wanna have kids with you.
Monica: (sitting down) Gary's gonna ask you to move in with him!!
Ross: Space is filled with orbiting children. (pause) Look, please, just come on, you know, when you’ll see the look on Emma’s face, I swear you won’t regret it.
Rachel: Ugh. (takes the hat and covers Emma's head and half her face with it)
Monica: What are you guys doing? (Monica hears the moaning coming from the TV and looks at it) Oh my God, is that Richard? (It only takes a split second for Joey to realise, he pulls Monica down by her jacket, and she falls, face down next to Chandler. Chandler gets up a bit, and Joey quickly covers Chandler's eyes with his hand.)
Monica: All right, lets be practical, if Ross isnt willing to do it, hes not the only guy in the world you can have sex with. You can borrow ChandlerChandler is good!
Rachel: So uh, heard you had some fun with Tag last night.
Joey: (Checks him out) Okay! (Walks over to his table and sits down with him)
Ross: That was the water fountain! Okay?! Anyway, people are writing reports for me, uh pushing back deadlines to meet my schedule, I'm telling you, you get tough with people you can get anything you want. (Joey walks by with a cup of coffee.) Hey Tribbiani, give me that coffee! Now!
Ross: Whats wrong with being the Bings?
Phoebe: You ask us to find you a guy and you come traipsing in here with your own!
Parker: What a beautiful place. What a great night! I have to tell you, being here with all of you in Event Room C I feel so lucky. I think of all the good times that have happened here. The birthdays, the proms, the mitzvahs both bar and bat, but none of them will compare with tonight! My God, I dont want to forget this moment! Its like I want to take a mental picture of you all! Click! (He takes a mental picture of them all.)
Ross: A no sex pact huh? I actually have one of those going on with every woman in America.
Joey: Okay well, I was down on one knee with the ring in my hand
Monica: (starting to cry) Im sorry I almost made you sleep with Ross. (They hug.)
CHANDLER: Don't play with his things.
Ross: What was with the dishes?
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is singing, with everyone else present.]
Monica: We should get over there and see if she's okay. (switching places with Ross) Just one...second! Score! (Monica scores, high-fives with Ross) Game! Come on. (Monica and Phoebe leave)
[Chandler enters with his hair full of mousse and a cheesy moustache]
Phoebe: You knew this and you never said anything?! With all the stupid dinosaur stuff you tell us?!
Rachel: what, how do we know, we never slept with you.
Chandler: Oh, yeah. Yeah, I found this great place called "Invisible things for Kathy." (Motions to an imaginary pile of presents next to him.) Can you give me a hand with all this stuff?
Joey: Yeah! Much! Listen uh, not that Im yknow insecure about my manhood or anything yknow, but I think I need to hook up with a woman like right now.
Joey: Tell me about it, huh? (Realizes that she can see Monica.) Oh no-no-no, I'm not with her, she's just Monica! (He pantomimes that out.) Ewwuck! (He pushes Monica away and makes a disgusted face.)
Joey: No, an entertainment unit, with a mail cubby built right in. Its a one day job, max.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is entering without touching anything with his hands. Phoebe, Monica, and Rachel are there.]
Chandler: Oh-aw my God! Now, I understand if you never want to sleep with me again, but that would be wrong. We're too good! We owe it, to sex!
Monica: What's with the guitar?