words in movies
Phoebe: Where were you?
Chandler: Oh, yeah! How did you meet her?
Chandler: Were you so late because you were burring this woman?
Rachel: Hey, yknow, at least you have somebody to miss that stuff with! I hate being alone this time of year! Next thing you know itll be Valentines Day, then my birthday, then bang!before you know it, theyre lighting that damn tree again. Ohh, I want somebody! (hearing this, Gunther moves in) Yknow, I want a man!! (Gunther leaves depressed) I mean, it doesnt even have to be a big relationship, yknow, just like a fling would be great.
Joey: Well, I know what Im giving you for Christmas.
Chandler: Yknow what? Theres some nice guys at my office, do you want me to set you up?
Rachel: Yeah! Wait a minute, its been a long time that Ive been single. How come you never offered this before?
Rachel: Well, wait a minute, youre the boss! Why dont you just yell at them? Or, fire them?
Monica: I would love too, but I cant! I mean I just cant, you know that Im not good at confrontation.
Chandler: Hey, you know what you can do? I remember reading about this director, I think it was Orson Wells, who at the beginning of the movie would hire somebody, just so he could fire them in front of everybody. Then they would all know, whos boss.
Joey: Hey, Mon! Im not doing anything, why dont you fire me?
Monica: Thats a good idea! Wait, do you know how to waiter?
Monica: All right, youre hired!
Chandler: I say, Drew! Are you seeing anybody right now? (Drew looks at him) Og-ee-op, Im not asking for me, Im I mean No, Im-Im not gay, Im not asking you out. Im not-Im not-Im not gay!
Drew: I didnt think you were gay. I do now.
Mike: Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! Is this, hot Rachel, that you took to the Christmas party, Rachel?
Phoebe: Hey! You guys, Im writing a holiday song for everyone. Do you want to hear it?
Joey: What are you talking about? Lots of things rhyme with Rachel. Bagel. Mail. Jail. Bail. Able. May-pole.
Phoebe: All good, thanks. (to Rachel) Do you maybe have a nickname have like a nickname thats easier to rhyme?
Monica: Didnt your dad used to call you Pumpkin?
Phoebe: Pumpkin? Yeah. But did he ever call you like, Budolph?
Chandler: (to Rachel) Have I got the 50 guys for you!
Chandler: Oh yeah, I just showed this a picture of you and guys were throwing themselves at me! Theyre buying me drinks! Theyre giving me stuff! (to Joey) Knicks tonight?
Phoebe: (shocked) You work with robots!!
Chandler: (pause) Yes. (to Rachel) Okay, theres this one guy, Patrick, I think youre gonna like him, hes really nice, hes funny, hes a swimmer.
Chandler: Its a big company, I dontif youI
Joey: Now, wait a second! You make food and robots?
Monica: You want a problem? Ill give you a problem!
Joey: Oh, what are you gonna do? Youre gonna fire me?
Monica: You bet your ass, Im gonna fire you! Thank you.
Ross: You know that girl I told you about who lives up in Poughkeepsie?
Phoebe: If shes no fun, why do you want to date her at all?
Monica: They baked it. I cant take this anymore. Im gonna call a meeting tonight, Im gonna fire you tonight.
Joey: You got it! Oh-oh! (He starts patting the burned spot, which just happens to be over her breast.)
Monica: What are you doing?!
Monica: Thanks. (Joeys still patting the burn spot) I think you got it!
Rachel: (entering) Chandler!! You have the best taste in men!
Chandler: Really?! I-I thought you werent looking for something serious? I thought you were looking for some kind of a fling.
Rachel: Well, y'know, possibly. (pause) You didnt tell him that, though? Right?
Rachel: You told this guy that I was looking for a fling?! You dont tell the guy that!
Rachel: Oh, between you telling him that I wanted to have a fling and me putting out on the first dateoh, hes so gonna get the wrong idea.
Monica: Hey, Joey, could you pass the cheese?
Joey: Yeah. Listen uh, Id prefer it if you didnt call me Joey. Since I dont know anyone here, I thought itd be cool to try out a cool work nickname.
Monica: Because your all gonna make up fake specials and make me cook them like you did the other night?
The Waiter: Cant hear you!
The Waiter: Hey! He has a name, its Dragon. Do you wanna know your name? Check your hat. (to another waiter) We did the hat right? (The other waiter nods yes.)
Monica: Joey, we had a deal. That-thats why youre here! Ive got to fire you!
Joey: And I gotta pay rent! Look, how-how about this? You dont fire me, instead I stay here, I gain their trust, and theyll start listening to all the nice things Ive been saying about you.
Monica: What kinda things have you been saying?
Joey: Well nothing yet, they really hate you and I want to fit in.
Phoebe: So! Ross doesnt really decorate his tree with floss, but you dont hear him complaining do you? God! (Phoebe hits her guitar which wakes up Ross with a start.)
Phoebe: So, did you pick one yet?
Phoebe: Well look, you dont really like the one from uptown and youre too exhausted from dating the one up in Poughkeepsie, so I say you just end them both. Okay? You take a train up to Poughkeepsie and break up with her, and on your way back you break up with uptown. And then by the time you get home tonight, youre done!
Ross: Yknow, youre right. Thank you.
Phoebe: Theres sooo much you dont know.
Rachel: Chandler! Patrick just uh, ended things with me. Did you or did you not tell him that I was looking for a serious relationship?
Rachel: You idiot!!
Chandler: Im sure youre right, but why?
Rachel: You dont tell a guy that youre looking for a serious relationship! You dont tell the guy that! Now you scared him away!
Rachel: Yknow, you should never be allowed to talk to people!
Chandler: Well, yknow, youre-youre gonna meet somebody! Youre a great catch! Yknow when I was telling all those guys about you, I didnt have to lie once. (He sits down on the arm of her chair)
Chandler: Yeah! You graduated Magma Ku Laude, right?
Chandler: Oh, it doesnt matter. (Kisses her on the top of her head.) Hey, yknow what, Ive got two tickets to tonights Rangers game, you wanna come with me?
Chandler: Have you ever been with a woman?
Rachel: What?! Chandler, what is the matter with you?!
Monica: I need more swordfish. (to one of the assistant chefs) Can you get me some more swordfish?
Monica: You did a minute ago!
The Waiter: You found that handle, did ya?
Monica: (starting to cry) Im a good person. And Im a good chef, and I dont deserve to have marinara sauce all over me! Yknow what, if you want me to quit this bad, then all you have to do is
Joey: (interrupting) Hey! Chef Geller! Yknow that little speech you made the other day? Well I got a problem with it!
Monica: You do?
Joey: You bet I do! I just ah, wasnt listening then, thats all.
Monica: Well if you want a problem? Ill give you a problem!
Joey: What are you gonna do? Youre gonna fire me?
Monica: You bet your ass Im gonna fire you! Get out of my kitchen! Get out!! (Joey leaves) All right! Anybody else got a problem? How bout you Chuckles? You think this is funny now?
Monica: How about if I dance around all covered in sauce? Huh? You think its funny now?
Monica: Good! Now, take those salads to table 4, (to the kitchen worker from earlier) And you! Get the swordfish! (to another assistant chef) And you! Get a haircut!
Woman On Train: I made a bet with myself that you have beautiful eyes. Now that I see them, I win.
Woman On Train: Were at my stop. But would you like to have coffee?
Ross: Coffee sounds great. (They get up) Wait, so, so you live in Montreal?
Phoebe: (singing) "Went to the store, sat on Santa's lap. Asked him to bring my friends all kind of crap. Said all you need is to write them a song. They haven't heard it, so don't try and sing along. No, don't sing along.
Phoebe: Save it Red! Unless you wanna spend the night in the slammer, you apologize to the tree.
Phoebe: I hope its you.
Dr Green: You kids ready?
Chandler: Whatd you rent?
Rachel: (entering) Oh-ho, my God! That was so awesome! You totally got him back for calling you fat! He was just drooling all over you. That must've felt so great!
Joey: Cute! This is Janice! You remember Janice?
Rachel: No Yeah, all the time, constantly. It's terrifying. But you know that I figure it it has to work out.
Ross: Why did you do that?
Mona: I dont understand. You-you give me a key to your apartment and then you change the lock.
Rachel: Okay. Okay, we'll be here! Hating you! Did you see how he was sweating when he walked out of there? Listen honey, if I'm hogging the ball too much you just jump right in there and take a couple punches because I'm telling you, this feels great.
Monica: Oh! Oh my God! That is the most beautiful top of a head I have ever seen! Chandler, you have to see this!
Monica: I know, but you have to open it today! (Hands it too him.)
Joey: (looking around) You got me. I dont
VAN DAMME: Can't you see what's going on here, this man is dying.
Monica: What are you doing?
Rachel: Honey, stop it! I am not going to tell you until I tell him.
Monica: Did you break up with her?
Rachel: Oh! Thank you!
JOEY: (spots the suitcase just inside the door where Chandler left it) Whoa, whoa.� Wait a minute.� Wait a minute.� If you just got back from Tulsa, how did your suitcase beat you here?
Rachel: How come you are?!
Ross: That's so Janine, you-you-you know what, do you know we're doing right now? You and I, we're interfacing.
Phoebe: What are you talking about?
Caitlin: (laughs) Great. I'll see you later!
Rachel: Yeah, ohh! Why, damnit, why did I open my mouth? (In a girlish voice) I have a crush on you; I am attracted to you. (Back to normal again) Gee, I-I know that I freaked him out
Joey: Hey, youre ah, pretty good at this.
Ross: (takes a drink) Damn, this coffees cold! Hey Rach, do you mind if I heat this up on your loins? (Joey and he both laugh.)
Emily: So what are you saying? Its now or never?
Chandler: Because you kept talking to him while he was trying to go to the bathroom?!
Ross: Sure, what do you got?
Rachel: Joey, what are you talking about? Youre a terrific actor.
Joey: Will you pick one, just pick one! Here, how about that one? (points to a table)
Female Clerk: Can I help you?
Chandler: Do you have my credit card?
Phoebe: No, no, no, I actually it's any baby animals: kittens, fish babies... You know... especially veal... and this, this nice vein of fat running through it... (she cuts the meat, picks it up with her fork and holds it in front of her mouth, which she keeps closed, trying to overcome her vegetarian thoughts... and... puts it in her mouth... Clearly not enjoying the meat...) Hmmm... yummy (everybody seems okay with it, except Mike. He's making a hmmmm.... face... Then Phoebe swallows it) Hmmm... (at first she likes it, but then, in an instant puts her hand in front of her mouth and runs from the table. You hear a door slamming.)
Chandler: Ok, you can not do this to me.
Rachel: That is it! You just barge in here, you don't knock
Janice: (laughs) I don't think we need to, because you're tripping me out right now! Are you okay?
Monica: Yeah! (They turn to the camera, and Chandler does The Face again.) All right, maybe you dont have to smile. Lets try something else. Lets try umm, try looking sexy.
Chandler: Oh, no, no, no, don't go! I've scared ya'! I've said too much! I'm hopeless, and awkward, and desperate for love!! (Janice leaves, Chandler then calls Janice to leave a message on her machine) Hey, Janice! It's me. Um, yeah, I-I-I just wanna apologize in advance for having chased you down the street. (runs out the door)
Rachel: Well excuse me, my fashion-impaired friends, I am here to tell you that hats are back.
Julie: Thats why you broke up with me?
Ross: No! Okay! Okay! (Stops her.) Okay, look, can I, can I just-just talk to you for a second?
Rachel: Whoa! My God! So what, you all just joined together to hate me?! Who else was in this club?
Phoebe: Ice sculpture? That sounds really fancy! I told you I just want a simple wedding.
Chandler: Id carry you around in my pocket.
Elizabeth: Oh! Sorry! Umm, I actually do need to talk to you.
Rachel: You do? Why?
Carol: What do you mean?
Ross: You know what? That is a very good idea. I'm gonna go make a pitcher of Margaritas.
Phoebe: Youre the best. Thanks. Oh!
PHOEBE: Ok, I'll walk you out.
Joey: Oh, man, why did have to go and say that for? Now that you told me I can't have it makes me want her even more!
Chandler: So are you gonna...talk to her?
Rachel: Why?! What?! Are you kidding?!
MONICA: Hey, you know I got a question for ya. Just a little thing, no pressure.
Phoebe: (gasps) My God! What did you order?!
Joeys Date: You must be Rachel, Im Erin.
Joey: Well if you can't talk dirty to me, how're you going to talk dirty to her? Now tell me you want to caress my butt!
Chandler: You didnt bring me here to do that, did you?
Chandler: Well, that's what we do. Y'know, I-I mess up and then you tell me how to fix it and then I do and then y'know you think I'm all cute again.
David: -hard quality. And uh, while Daryl Hannah is beautiful in a conventional way, you are luminous with a kind of a delicate grace. Then, uh, that-that-that's when you started yelling. (Sits down)
Ross: I know! Im saying you have to watch them all the time.
Joey: You know what's crazy? These jars. What is it, like two bites in here?
Chandler: You said no right?!
Chandler: (laughs) You said no right?
The Teacher: Are you just repeating what I'm saying?
Ross: oh boy you got mad at that part. I went over there to tell him how great you are but you know me BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, and I ended up telling him that.
Monica: Maybe because it's you hung your head out of the window like a dog the whole ride here.
Chandler: Well, you can't just not see Rachel anymore, she's one of your best friends.
RACHEL: No.� No, because I know exactly how the conversation's gonna go.� "Hey Ross, you know, I think we had a moment before."
Monica: (entering with Erica and Chandler) Hey you guys.
Monica: (to the couple) Hi! Can you do that and walk? Cause she said, "Next."
Chandler: You cant just call Monicas room.
Joey: (to Phoebe) Hey, how you doin?
Phoebe: So Monica, what were you gonna tell us?
Buffay, the Vampire Layer: Ah, I thought Id find you here, Nasforatool.
Joey: Wait a second, I see what youre trying to do here! You-youre trying to give me money again!
(Cassie enters from the guest room, with her hair up. The extremely beautiful and sexy Denise Richards is playing Cassie. Woo hoo! For those of you who dont know who she is, rent Wild Things and she was also the last Bond girl in The World Is Not Enough.)
JOEY: Yeah, unless you hook up with a bunch of pigeons.
Joey: Can I tell you something? Me too.
Waiter #2: What are you doing? Are you trying to get him to stay? Because you can't do that.
Ross: (goes over to Julio) Come here, here, come here, come here, (pause) Mrs. Buffay. Sorry, about what I said, umm, it was, it was insensitive of me to say that you were just a cat. When clearly you are also the reincarnated spirit, of my friends mother.
Rachel: (To Ross) You know what? We should call my mum's house and say goodnight to Emma before she goes down.
Monica: No, you can't! Friends hooking up is a bad idea.
Ross: Hey, maybe I can fix that, you know. Try to turn it into something else. (he opens the box)
Phoebe: Didnt you sleep together?
Kim: Oh thats interesting? Because I checked and only one keycard was used to access the copy machine yesterday during lunch and that keycard belonged to you, Rachel.
Rachel: Look, Charlie, I just want you to know. Ross is just having a little trouble adjusting to the thought of Joey and me. You know, he normally doesn't drink like this.
Monica: So you had fun, huh?
Monica: Oh my god, Emma. Oh, sweetie, I forgot you were here. Oh, you're right, we can't do this. We can't leave her alone.
Monica: All right. Umm, you could uh start out with a little 1, a 2, a 1-2-3, 3, 5, a 4, a 3-2, 2, a 2-4-6, 2-4-6, 4, (Rachel starts getting worked up) 2, 2, 4-7, 5-7, 6-7, 7 7.. 7 7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7 (mouths 7)! (They both lean back on the couch satisfied.)
Rachel: Thank you judges.
Joey: Okay. See you guys later.
David: Still you know, a girl calls you by your ex-boyfriend's name, that-that's not a good thing, right?
Ross: Yes? Yes?! How can I help you?
The Director: But youre supposed to work on Monday.
Ross: You weren't trying to entice me with your nakedness.
Phoebe: Oh really? She said she wants to go away with you?
Joey: (entering the hall) Oh man! Aren't you guys done yet?! I wanna sit in my chair!
CHANDLER: Hey man, look it's my best bud. How ya doin? [Joey doesn't respond] Wow, you are really gettin' good at that Marcel Marceau thing. Hey, whaddya say uh, we play some ball, you and me, huh, whaddya say? [Throws a basketball to Joey. Joey doesn't move to catch it and the ball takes out a lamp] OK, that's my bad.