words in movies
Chandler: (deadpan, standing next to Monica) We're very happy for you.
Joey: Ross! Ross! Ross, listen! Who are you kissing at midnight, huh? Rachel or Phoebe?
Joey: Well you gotta kiss someone, you can't kiss your sister.
Joey: Dude-dude, who would you rather have kiss your sister, me or Chandler?
Joey: Pheebs! Pheebs! Ross wants to kiss you at midnight!
Joey: Rach! Rach! Listen, I'm gonna kiss you at midnight.
Ross: Well, everyone's gotta kiss someone. You can't kiss Ross you got the history.
Joey: So? Who would you rather have kiss you, me or Chandler?
Phoebe: You too!
Chandler: Do you want us to leave the room, or?
Chandler: That's good one too, Pheebs. Now all you have to do is find a planeload of people who's resolution is to plummet to their deaths.
Phoebe: Maybe your resolution is to not make fun of your friends, especially the ones who may soon be flying you to Europe for free on their own plane.
Monica: She has a better chance of sprouting wings and flying up your nose than you do of not making fun of us.
Ross: In fact, I'll bet you 50 bucks that you can't go the whole year without making fun of us. Eh, y'know what, better yet? A week.
Chandler: I'll take that bet my friend. And you know what, paying me the 50 bucks could be the "new thing you do that day!" (Ross looks at him.) And it starts right now!
Phoebe: Do you want me to teach you? I'm a great teacher.
Joey: Really? Who-who have you taught?
Rachel: Op, look! Claire forgot her glasses! And she's gonna be really needing these to keep an eye on that boyfriend, who, I hear, needs to keep his stapler in his desk drawer, if you know what I'm talking about.
Rachel: Well, maybe sometimes I find out things or I hear something and I pass that information on y'know kinda like a public service, it doesn't mean I'm a gossip. I mean, would you call Ted Kopel a gossip?
Woman: I'll see you tomorrow.
Joey: You all right Chandler? Is there something funny about that name?
Phoebe: Hornswoggle? (To Chandler) Ooh, this must be killing you.
Ross: All right, see you later.
Phoebe: Okay. (Joey tries to take the guitar.) Oh no-no-no, you don't touch the guitar! First you learn here, (Points to her head.) then you learn here. (Points to the guitar.)
Phoebe: Okay, lesson one: chords. Now, I don't know the actual names of the chords but umm, I-I-I made up names for the way my hand looks while I'm doing them. (She starts to show Joey the chords. Transcribers Note: For this one you'll have to use your imagination, 'cause it would take me 50 pages to describe each one. So if you want to see them, you'll have to wait for this episode to come to a TV near you.) (Holding up her hand and then reconfiguring her hand with each name.) So then, this is Bear Claw. Okay, umm, Turkey Leg and Old Lady. (Joey tries to imitate them.)
Phoebe: Ooh, you nailed the Old Lady! (They both laugh at what she said.)
Phoebe: Did you, did you touch any of the guitars while you were there? Did you?!
Phoebe: Give me your hands. (He does and she smells his left hand.) Strings. Gimme it! (He gives her his right hand and she smells it as well.) Pick. Do you want to learn to play guitar?
Chandler: That's not what I had in mind! See, people like Ross don't generally wear these types of pants. You see, they're very tight. (Motions to Ross's buttock.) Maybe there's something in that area.
Ross: (after he's left) Okay, seriously, what do you think?
Joey: You look like a freak.
Ross: What are you, what are you doing?
Ross: (talking to himself) My God! These pants are burning up! (He's still wearing the leather pants.) (She snuggles closer.) Oh come on, she wants to snuggle now! What is she trying to kill me? It's like a volcano in here! (Out loud.) Are you hot?
Ross: That was just the pants on the couch. Umm, hey, do you, do you mind if I use your bathroom?
Phoebe: Tiger! (Joey moves his hand in an attempt to do the chord, in fact he does it with each name.) Dragon! Iceberg!! (He fails.) Joseph, did you even study at all last night?
Phoebe: G-sharp? Have you been studying the real names of the chords? (Joey doesn't answer.) Have you? (He looks away in shame.) Oh my God!
Monica: Thank you. (Leaves.)
Joey: Your other student, was you!
Phoebe: Yeah, well, y'know maybe you just need to try a little harder!
Phoebe: Fine! You go learn from your qualified instructor! But don't come crying to me when everyone's sick and tired of hearing you play Bad, Bad Leroy Brown!!
Monica: (on phone) I can't wait to be with you! I'll sneak over as soon as Ross picks up Ben. I'll just tell Rachel I'm gonna be doing laundry for a couple of hours.
Ross: Well, you can help me!
Joey: Oh. That is quite a situation. Uh, do you see any like, powder?
Joey: Good-good, okay, sprinkle some of that on your legs, it'll absorb some of the moisture and then you can get your pants back up.
Joey: Umm, do you see anyoh, Vaseline?
Joey: Ross? You okay?
Joey: Well, I'm justif the paste matches the pants, you can make yourself a pair of paste pants and she won't know the difference!
Rachel: (entering) Joey, do you have a minute?
Rachel: Okay. Okay. Okay. Joey, I have got to tell you something!
Rachel: Oh my God, it's so huge, but you just have to promise me that you cannot tell anyone.
Rachel: Yes! Yes! Yes, you do want to know! This is unbelievable!
Rachel: What? What secrets? You know secrets? What are they?
Joey: I'm not listening to you!
Ross: All right, I'm coming out. Hey, can you turn the lights off.
Phoebe: No, I can't talk to you! I don't have a fancy ad in the Yellow Pages!
Joey: Look, Pheebs, I just, I wanna apologize for, for saying that your method was stupid and-and maybe ask you to be my teacher again. And-and I promise, I won't touch a guitar until you say I'm ready. (After a short pause she hands him her guitar.) You really think I'm ready?
Monica: Hey, hey, look. Look Ross, Ben drew a picture of you! (Shows him Ben's picture.) Huh? You're-you're a cowboy!
Rachel: Remember that big thing I was gonna tell you about?
Rachel: I'm not gonna tell you, but if you found out on your own, that would be okay and then we could talk about it. Right?
Joey: Now? You want me to go over there now?
Joey: Do you know something?
Rachel: Do you know something?
Joey: What's the thing you know?
Rachel: Oh no, I can't tell you until you tell me what you know.
Joey: I can't tell you what I know.
Rachel: Well then I can't tell you what I know.
Joey: You don't know!
Joey: (gasps) YOU KNOW!!!!
Rachel: AND YOU KNOW!!!
Rachel: Chandler and Monica?!! Oh, this is unbelievable!! How long have you known?
Chandler: (entering) Oh good, okay, I can't take it anymore. I can't take it anymore. So you win, okay? Here! (Hands him the 50 bucks he's about to owe him.) Pheebs? Flying a jet? Better make it a spaceship so that you can get back to your home planet! And Ross, phone call for you today, Tom Jones, he wants his pants back! And Hornswoggle? What are you dating a character from Fraggile Rock?! (He sits down and sighs in relief.)
Monica: Hey, you wanna see something?
Hold Voice: Thank you for your patience, youre the next caller.
Chandler: Its possible. You are very loveable, Id miss you if I broke up with you. (Ross glares at him) I was just trying to be supportive.
Chandler: Well, why dont you tell her to stop being silly! (Monica mocks him and he joins in.)
Chandler: The problem is, though, after the concert's over, no matter how great the show was, you girls are always looking for the comedian again, y'know? I mean, we're in the car, we're fighting traffic... basically just trying to stay awake.
Rachel: Did you get all this stuff for Joey to try and drive me out of the apartment? Honey, if you wanted to do that, you might as well just gotten him a fish, you know how fish freaked me out!
Ross: Look Chandler, Monica is really weird about this kind stuff all right. Believe me, I lived with her for 16 years. She is going to freak out. Oh my God, she's going to sit on you.
FRANK: Yeah hey, you know if you want I can take you around back and show you where he hit his head on the rain gutter.
Phoebe: Why dont you go up there and ask him to step lightly, please?
Chandler: Okay, so if an eight comes up, we take it as a sign and we do it! {Whoa! Where have I heard that before? Matthew Perry talking about signs in Las Vegas. I guess it must've been some movie I saw.} What do you say?
Rachel: Joey, Joey I love you so much, but I
JOEY: [in a fake voice] Uhh, hello Miss Buffay. I know where your dog is. I want you to know that he'll be returned to you, almost as good as new, within, within 24 hours. Uh, goodbye. [hangs up]
RACHEL: OK, you wanna play? OK, let's play, let's play. [She grabs a jar of tomato sauce and Monica's purse]
Chandler: You can be the best man when I get married.
Phoebe: Yes. Did you settle the bill?
Joey: Well, she and I said from the beginning that we weren't gonna do anything unless you were okay with it. And clearly..
PHOEBE: Happy Christmas Eve Eve. [sees Ross's picture frame] Oh my God, where did you get this?
Ross: Oh yeah, how about you and the, (mimics her fake cry) "Im sorry!"
The Casting Director: Actually, that can't happen. Yeah because you all have such different looks, we're putting you with Raymond and Kyle with Ben. So it'll be either you two (Points to Joey and Raymond) or you two. (Points to Kyle and Ben.) (Exits.)
Rachel: ...the way you owned up to everything, it just showed me how much youve grown. Y'know? I mean my Mom never thought this would work out. It was all, Once a cheater, always a cheater. Ooh, I just wish we hadnt lost those four months, but if time was what you needed just to gain a little perspective...
Mackenzie: Then you gotta let them go.
Monica: (Yells after him) I love you!
Estelle: Joey, sweetheart, you were fabulous!
Phoebe: And you know, I have a massage client soon.
Rachel: You know what honey, you go ahead, well call her an alternate.
Joey: So let me get this straight. If you go with Bonnie tonight, youre doing the smart, healthy thing and moving on.
Chandler: Im gonna do it tomorrow yknow, and-and surprise her, but now youve ruined it!
Ross: Okay, Joey, you know what? You have to go for it. How often does this happen to you, huh? You owe it to yourself. (Walks towards the door until )
Rachel: Uh-huh. Okay. You know what, Joey, I don't think he's ever gonna be okay with this.
Monica: Of course not nothing is. Between me and you
PHOEBE: Ok, do you know A minor?
Mrs. Geller: Oh honey, come on, have a sense of humour, youve never been able to laugh at yourself.
Ross: Im telling you, just a little bit at a time.
Monica: Chandler, this actually bothers you?
David: Uh, I-I-I was hoping to run into you here. I didnt know whether I should call or not, yknow I-I was only in town for a few days. And yknow, I didnt want to intrude on your life or-or anything like that, but I-I really wanted to see you andbut I didnt know if you wanted to see me.
Rachel: Excuse me? Can I help you with anything?
Chandler: Well, sure, but can you play it on a plane? (pats his Travel Scrabble game)
Ross: Look, would you guys grow up? That is the most natural beautiful thing in the world.
Chandler: (intrigued) Yeah? (Monica nods yes.) I hope youre not thinking about cleaning the living room.
Phoebe: Oh, you’re right! I was just kidding about Rachel. Babysitting is a gas!
Ross: Oh uh, I had trouble remembering everyones name, so I-I kinda came up with nicknames. Like the guy on the other side of you was Smelly von Brownshirt.
Katie: Ohh, I love Chinese! How did you know I love Chinese?! (She hits him repeatedly as she says that.)
Chandler: Yeah, Joe, I assure you if I'm staring down the barrel of a gun, I'm pretty much peeing every which way.
Carol: (screaming at Ross) Oh, what do you know? No one's going up to you and saying, "Hi, is that your nostril? Mind if we push this pot roast through it?"
Monica: Hi, sorry. I almost didnt hear you, because yknow Im just so in love with my new husband. Were on our honeymoon.
Rachel: Oh my God!! Do it!! Honey, youve waited long enough!!
GUNTHER: Lemonade? You ok man?
Joey: Hey, finished my recommendation. (he hands it over to Chandler) Here. And I think you’ll be very, very happy. It’s the longest I ever spent on a computer without looking at porn.
Chandler: Oh, yeah. (Starts to take it off and then realizes) Uh, no you cant have my jacket! Because then I would be cold! If you thought that you were going to be cold, you shouldve brought your own jacket. But uh, other than that, are you okay? Are you okay?
Rachel: Okay Joey honey, youre doing really good! All right, now Im just gonna need you to step to the port side. (Joey pauses as he tries to remember which side is the port side.) Remember? Remember how we talked about the port side?
Phoebe: Three months? Okay... This is probably none of my business, but uhm, how long do you think you're gonna keep seeing her?
Monica: (on phone) Michelle, I only beeped in so I could hear my message. I mean that's allowed. Yeah-huh! I mean look, yeah, you know what I would really appreciate it if you didn't tell your Dad about. What do you mean, you're not comfortable with this? Come on we're friends!! (Michelle hangs up) That bitch always hated me. I'm calling her back.
Rachel: I wrote you a letter.
Monica: (entering) Did I miss it? (Phoebe nods no.) Rachel, I-I want you to know that, if its positive, were gonna
Phoebe: Well, I made you a candle light dinner in the park.
Monica: Y'know if its any consolation, he really did sound like he was having more fun with you. (Rachel nods in agreement)
Mr. Geller: I'm not gonna tell you what they spent on that wedding... but forty thousand dollars is a lot of money!
Monica: Okay fine! I keep betting Phoebe that youre gonna have the baby and I dont want to lose again!
Rachel: No Phoebe! You cannot get the phone that way; thats not fair! Okay look, I have an idea. Why dont we, why dont we see what kind of number he has on his speed dial, and then from that we can tell who has more in common with him. And then whoever does gets the phone.
Dr. Rosen: This is a great place. How long have you lived here?
Chandler: Phoebe, did you see that?! He totally checked you out! He is so cute! (Looking at his tea.) Mine has a picture of The Village People, what does that mean?
Joey: Yeah, I guess it is. And so Im gonna get on this spaceship, (Smoke starts pouring in from the ceiling, and a ladder comes down, with flashing, colored lights on the side of it) and Im gonna go to Blargon 7 in search of alternative fuels. But when I return, 200 years from now, youll be long gone. But I wont have aged at all. (Gets on the ladder) So you tell your great-great-granddaughter to look me up, because Adrienne baby Im gonna want to meet her.
Joey: Thank you, but it would take me forever to pay you that money back and I dont want that hanging over my head. Okay? Besides, as soon as my insurance kicks in I can get all the free operations I want! Yeah, Im thinking Ill probably start with that laser eye surgery too.
Monica: So I hide in the shower and the next thing you know theyre going at it right on the bathroom floor.
Chandler: All right, wait! Come on! Just wait one second! There has to be something that I can do! Something! If we still had that entertainment unit I would get in it for six hours and think about how I let you down. (Joey looks intrigued) What?
Ross: Yeah, didn�t I mention that? Yeah, I mean, we haven�t being going out for too long, but rather there is thisamazing connection between us. I-I mean, in fact just before you came in she called me her boyfriend. I thought it wasa little too soon, but it was also, you know, it was kinda nice.
Fireman No. 3: It's all right. It's all right. You don't have to explain. This isn't the first boyfriend bonfire that we've seen get out of control.
Phoebe: But Mon, you have to get our money!
Chandler: Thank God you didn't try to fan out the magazines. I mean, she'll scratch your eyes right out.
Monica: Have you seen Rachel? Or a mirror?
Chandler: (on phone) Oh thats great! Good for you.
Phoebe: Uh-huh. Now you can turn around or you can go in there and rip the Band-Aid off. What to you want to do?
Ross: 11, unbelievable 11 is correct. (The guys celebrate.) All right, thats 4 for the guys. Ladies, youre up.
Monica: Ross, could you come and help me with the spaghetti, please?
Janine: Sure, New Years Eve is only two weeks away. Can you wait?
Joey: Twelve hundred dollars? You think I have $1200? Im home in the middle of the day, and I got patio furniture in my living room. I guess theres a few things you dont get from book learnin.
Ross: Okay, okay, fine, youre right. Lets ah, lets take a break, (goes to the door) lets cool off, okay, lets get some frozen yogart, or something.. (opens the door)
Charlie: I love you too! (and they start to kiss)
Monica: Well that's because you always sleep to noon, silly! This is what 9 looks like.
Joey: Oh, I do. (Gives her the Joey-love look.) How you doin?
Chandler: Shh! (To the guy behind the counter) Nice to see you again. (They tries to walk past him.)
Monica: All right then, then nothing changes! Everything is great! Everything stays the same! And you go unpack because its been three days and its driving me insane!
Rachel: Ross!! Oh my--ugh!! You kept count?! You are such a loser!
Joey: See, I actually can pour milk, but I got you believing that I couldnt. Now, see, thats acting.
Chandler: No Rach, its not just you. My thirtieth birthday certainly wasnt that much fun.
Chandler: Theyre not gonna swallow anything, you guys are being way over protective. When I was a kid, my mom used to just throw me into a pile of broken glass!
Joey: Well my old man is doing a plumbing job down there and he heard they have an opening. So, you want me to see if I can get you an interview?
Ross: All right, gentlemen, youre up first.
Monica: You broke a little girls leg?!!
Phoebe: Yeah, but you kinda knew that something was going on, didn't you?
Rachel: I'm sorry, you know, maybe I wasn't being clear. Uh, this is our cart.
Doctor: You know it's twins, right?
Phoebe: Can you believe this? (Rachel exhales in amazement.) We were waiting for a hot guy and then an even hotter one shows up!
Rachel: Well since Im movin out and-and youre so beautiful
Rachel: Ooh, I was soo nervous about that letter. But the way you owned up to everything, it just showed me how much youve grown. Y'know?
Joey: Get the ball, ready? Get the ball, get the ball! (Joey pretends to throw it, but really doesnt, and the dog goes running off.) Well, youre cute, but youre not too smart!
Guy: (muffled) Whoa, you are very beautiful.
Rachel: Ill tell ya who should be embarrassed! Its you guys! Come on! This is ridiculous! Thank you very much, but I do not need you to get me a date!
Lizzie: Weird Girl, what are you doing?
Joey's Look-A-Like: Im Joey! How are you doin?!