words in movies
Chandler: So did Monica tell you about this great band called the Swing Kings that were trying to get to play at the wedding?
Phoebe: Since when are you into swing music?
Chandler: Gap commercial. (To Monica) So did you book them? Did you call?
Chandler: Do you want me to call?
Monica: No, Ill do it. You just stick to your job.
Joey: This is impossible Monica, why dont you just pick all 15? (Hands back the paper.)
The Woman: Could you guys help me? (Chandler shyly exhales and looks away.)
Ross: Uh yeah! Let me, let me get that for you.
Ross: Kristen, hi. Are you uh, new to the area, cause if you are Id love to show you around sometime.
Ross: Umm, say youre gonna be starving after all this moving. What do you say I take you to dinner tonight?
Ross: Great! Uh, let me take this up for you. (The box hes holding.)
Kristen: After you.
Ross: Oh no-no, after you. (She grabs a chair and heads upstairs.) (When shes gone.) Oh my God! (He drops the box and Chandler cant pick it up.)
Rachel: Oh my God! You look so beautiful!
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Thank you Rachel but, look at Monica!
The Woman: Wow you look so beautiful! If I knew you, Id cry.
Monica: Have you found your dress yet?
Monica: Yeah! So-so when are you getting married?
Megan: (To Monica) So when are you getting married?
Megan: We met with him. Did he show you the photos of the nude wedding he did?
Megan: Oh, youre so lucky. My fiancee wants the heavy metal band Carcass.
Rachel: Oh yknow what? Yknow what? Now that you know what you want you should go to Kleinmans and get it half off. This place is so overpriced.
Joey: (checking her out) Hi! You uh, movin in or movin out?
Joey: Oh uh, can I give you a hand?
Kristen: So uh, do you live around here?
Joey: Yeah! Yeah! Right down there. (Points.) Hey listen; let me give you a little tip. Do not take a nap on this stoop (Points to hers) or you can wake up with your shoes gone.
Joey: Okay. Yeah. Listen would you uh, would you like to have dinner with me tonight?
Kristen: You look strong, why dont I take that and you grab one of the boxes.
Monica: All right, listen up. There is usually only one dress in each size so when they open those doors, fan out. Now, this is what youre looking for! (Holds up a picture of it.) Memorize it! When you locate the dress, blow on these. All right? (She passes out whistles to them.) Three short blasts, when you hear it. Come running.
Monica: You came?!
Monica: Yes it is! You saw me wearing it!
Megan: And now youll see me buying it.
Monica: What? You freak! You wouldnt even have known about this place if it wasnt for me!
Megan: Look, you dont want to fight me.
Phoebe: Okay! (Runs that way and hears another whistle blast.) Hey! (Heads the other way and hears another blast.) What do I do?!! (She runs in the second direction and finds that the whistling is coming from inside a rack. She moves the dresses out of the way to find Rachel curled up in a fetal position frantically blowing on the whistle.) What are you doing? (Rachel doesnt stop.) Did you find the dress? (Rachel wont stop so Phoebe pinches her nose shut which causes her to spit the whistle out.)
Phoebe: Did you find the dress?
Rachel: No! You gotta get me out of here Phoebe! These bargain shoppers are crazy!
Rachel: No! You gotta hold my hand!!
Chandler: So Ross, how was your date the other night? Did you tell her about the magical ride that starts with the flush of every toilet?
Ross: Laugh all you want but uh, she actually left me a message saying shed like to go out again.
Chandler: Uh Joe, when its one oclock in the morning and you dont come by? Thats okay!
Chandler: Whend you meet her?
Chandler: (sarcastically shocked) Really?! Joe? What would you do if you were in Rosss situation?
Ross: Well you shouldnt be. Believe me I wouldnt want to be the guy whos up against you. (Chandler laughs.) I mean that doofus is going to lose!
Chandler: So this is nice! I wish I didnt have to go, believe me! But unfortunately I have to. (He gets up and Joey moves over next to Ross.) Oh uh, by the way, whats the name the girl youre dating?
Rachel: Youre out of Diet Coke.
Monica: Hello? (Listens) What?! (Listens) You what?! (Listens) Hey you listen here missy! (Listens) Wh(She is hung up on.)
Rachel: Youre out of toilet paper!
Joey: I just wanted to come by and yknow, wish you good luck on your date.
Joey: Yeah. What time are you meeting her?
Joey: Wow, thats in like 20 minutes. Youd better get dressed.
Joey: Oh. Well good! (To himself) For me. (He picks up a jar of lotion.) What is this? Did you give yourself a facial?
Joey: Okay dude! (Finds a receit.) Hey you uh, you sent Kristen flowers.
Joey: You spent a hundred dollars. Thats the limit. Youre screwed!
Ross: Oh yeah? What are you gonna do?
Joey: Yknow what Ross? Im not gonna let you get away with this!
Ross: I dont think you have much choice.
Chandler: (returning) What are you guys talking about?
Rachel: Well you have to because maybe its stupid.
Chandler: Well its just while Monica and I were dancing to them it was the first time I knew that you were the woman I wanted to dance all my dances with.
Ross: Oh yeah its fine. I guess the more muscles you have the more they can spasim out of control.
Kristen: Hi! What are you doing here?
Ross: Hi. (They shake hands.) Its nice to meet you. I used to have a friend named Joey. I dont anymore.
Joey: Sure! I would love to wait with you guys! Thanks! (Sits down.)
Ross: So Joey umm, you look familiar. Are uh, are you on TV or something?
Ross: Thats right! Thats right, dont you play a woman?
Joey: So yknow Ross its funny cause, you look familiar to me too. Have you ever been married?
Joey: So youve just married the one time then?
Kristen: Youve been married twice?
Ross: Yes. And another time after that. Boy Im getting hungry! Hey Joey, have you ever been so hungry on a date that when a girl goes to the bathroom you eat some of her food?
Kristen: You said the waiter ate my crab cake.
Kristen: Do you two know each other?
Ross: Wait a minute! Were you on a poster for gonorrhea?
Joey: Have you ever slept in the same bed as a monkey?!
Ross: Hey you leave Marcel out of this!
Joey: Fine! Have you ever got stuck in a pair of your own leather pants?!
Ross: Hey-hey have you ever locked yourself in a TV cabinet VD boy?!
Joey: When do you think we lost her?
Chandler: Why? Do you another boyfriend in there or something?
Chandler: Yknow its funny I started it but, now its scary me. So could you come out here please?
Chandler: Oh you got a wedding dress? Thats great!
Monica: Oh. I guess you can. Okay but; I-I have to return it, so you cant like it.
Chandler: Yeah, thats like the most ugliest dress Ive ever seen. Wh-why do you to return it?
Chandler: Oh thats great! Great! Thanks! But that dress I mean its like yuck! Its terrible! It makes me wanna just rip it right off of you!
Monica: Okay! But you cant rip it. Well, maybe a little.
Monica: (entering) Hey guys! Do you wanna look at the song list for the wedding? (They ignore her.) Guys?
Chandler: (without turning around) I thought you were gonna be gone all day.
Monica: Im sorry. Im sorry. I-I should probably leave you girls alone. (She heads for the bedroom.)
Ross: Yeah, laugh all you want but in ten minutes were gonna have younger looking skin!
Rachel: I'm sorry, you know, maybe I wasn't being clear. Uh, this is our cart.
Doctor: You know it's twins, right?
Phoebe: Can you believe this? (Rachel exhales in amazement.) We were waiting for a hot guy and then an even hotter one shows up!
Rachel: Well since Im movin out and-and youre so beautiful
Rachel: Ooh, I was soo nervous about that letter. But the way you owned up to everything, it just showed me how much youve grown. Y'know?
Joey: Get the ball, ready? Get the ball, get the ball! (Joey pretends to throw it, but really doesnt, and the dog goes running off.) Well, youre cute, but youre not too smart!
Guy: (muffled) Whoa, you are very beautiful.
Rachel: Ill tell ya who should be embarrassed! Its you guys! Come on! This is ridiculous! Thank you very much, but I do not need you to get me a date!
Lizzie: Weird Girl, what are you doing?
Joey's Look-A-Like: Im Joey! How are you doin?!
Joey: Hey, I only got one good arm, you know. You should be doing stuff for me. Go get me a sweater.
Big Nosed Rachel: Okay, Monica, can you just call it sex?! It really creeps me out when you call it that! Okay, and by the way, while we're at it, a guy's thing is not called his tenderness. Believe me! (Walks into the living room and greets Monica's parents.) Hi!
Joey: (voice all high and weird) What?! Are you crazy?!
Rachel: Well its mine too! What else you got?!
Supervisor: Theyre always going to tell you they dont need toner, but thats okay because whatever they say, you can find the answer to it here in this script.
Chandler: Come on, Ross, you gotta get back in the game here, ok? The Rachel thing's not happening, your ex-wife is a lesbianI don't think we need a third...
Monica: (on phone) Hello Greg? (Listens) Hi, this is Monica from the plane? Listen, the number that you gave me 853-5 (Listens) (To Chandler) That is their old number! Jennys been giving it out since they moved!
Rachel: Oh, Phoebe! Come on! You know what, it's already three o'clock and they haven't even gotten to Emma's group yet. We gotta go, we got dinner!
Phoebe: Hey Leslie, howd you know Id be here?
Elizabeth: Ross, its going to be okay. Im not going down there to hook up with a bunch of guys. I really like you. I like how things are going between us.
Rachel: Well, you know I'm not surprised. I mean have you seen them together, they're really cute.
JOEY: Wow, talk about your bad luck, I mean, the first time you try panties and someone walks off with your clothes.
Ross: Oh! I thought you guys got married in uh, January?
Joey: Hi! Im Dr. Drake Remoray and I have a few routine questions I need to ask you.
Racel: Yes and you talked to her...
Ross: Pheebs, did you want a cookie?
Dina: What are you going to do? Kill him? Like you did with Charles?!
Jill: But you know what might really cheer me up?
PHOEBE: You know, I think I want to write a song about all this.
Phoebe: Okay, dont worry. Youre ready.
Richard: You were gonna propose? (Sits on the arm of the couch.)
Rachel: Yeah! (She puts on her coat and turns around and sees Ross is expecting her to help.) (Laughing.) Are you kiddin'?
Phoebe: Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you, it was just, it was so sweet. (She goes to hug them and they both flinch, thinking that Phoebe is about to attack them.)
Ross: How could you have told her?
Phoebe: Okay, you said I could sing at your wedding so, Im just gonna need a small deposit.
Cashier: I can tell you work out. (Ross is please and Rachel looks at him confused.) A paleontologist who works out, youre like Indiana Jones. (Rachel has a disbelieving look on her face.)
Rachel: (to Monica) I still can't believe you invited Gavin. Allright, he is the last person I want to see.
Rachel: Pheebs, I can't believe he hasn't kissed you yet. I mean God, by my sixth date with Paolo, I mean he had already named both my breasts! ...Ooh. Did I just share too much?
Rachel: I mean maybe you didnt hear about a serious relationship called me and Joshua?
Rachel: Okay, oh, here's what you do. Just act like everything around you turns you on.
Joey: I knew that! (They all look at him) I sooo didnt know that, but you should see your faces.
Phoebe: Alright, now I will let go if you both stop.
Rachel: Oh honey, thank you, but Mark's taking me out.
Chandler: Well, is there any chance you were looking into a bright, shiny thing called a mirror?
Rachel: Oh God... well, it started about a half hour before the wedding. I was in the room where we were keeping all the presents, and I was looking at this gravy boat. This really gorgeous Lamauge gravy boat. When all of a sudden- (to the waitress that brought her coffee)Sweet 'n' Lo?- I realized that I was more turned on by this gravy boat than by Barry! And then I got really freaked out, and that's when it hit me: how much Barry looks like Mr. Potato Head. Y'know, I mean, I always knew looked familiar, but... Anyway, I just had to get out of there, and I started wondering 'Why am I doing this, and who am I doing this for?'. (to Monica) So anyway I just didn't know where to go, and I know that you and I have kinda drifted apart, but you're the only person I knew who lived here in the city.
Phoebe: Theres a reset button?! Ugh, thank you! Thank you! (He exits and she goes to shut it off.) Theres a reset button! My God! Why didnt I see that! (She takes off the plastic cover and looks for the button.) Reset button, reset button, where is there a reset button? (Finds it.) Oh here it is! (Picks it up off of the floor.) Oh! (She presses it hard, but of course it would help if the button was still attached to the detector. In frustration she presses it so hard it causes pain in her thumb.) Ohh, God!
Ross: Anyway.. um.. (Starts to sweep.) So, you- uh- you nervous about Barry tomorrow?
Monica: Phoebe, do you think that your favorite animal says much about you?
Paul: Well, this is fun. So Ross, did you kill any of these wives?
Phoebe: See? This is why you register.
Mike: Is it ok if I hug you now?
Rachel: Oh.. yeah? Well unless you pushed a desk out of your vagina, <shakes head no> not the same thing.
Rachel: See? Why, Gavin, why? Right when I'm about to change my opinion of you, you go and you ... (he kisses her) and you do that ... (they kiss again)
Ross: Hey, yknow what and if youre looking for a place? I just heard in the elevator this morning that a woman in my building died.
ROSS: Alright you know, why don't I just meet you upstairs. [Drops her on the couch and walks out holding his lower back.]
Joey: Not following you.
Rachel: Thats great! Wow man, so Joey mustve really taught you some stuff huh?
JOEY: Kinda looks like that stuff you get when you get a bad infection.
Phoebe: All in good time my love. All in good time. Oh shoot! I left my guitar in their apartment. Well you can let me in later.
Ross: How would he like to come with me to the Museum of Natural History after everyone else has left, just the two of us, and he can touch anything he wants. (Mr. Zellner looks shocked). I just heard it as you must have heard it and that’s not good. Let me start again. I’m a paleontologist, you’ll be there with us and the touching refers only to bones… fossils!
Monica: Well, if you wanna get a drink later we can.
Phoebe: Yeah well, once again not knocking pays off. I only wish you hadnt been on the toilet.
CHANDLER: That's a little more relaxed than you want them to get.
Rachel: Oh my God! Did you check your entire desk! Did you check all the drawers!
Rachel: (waving them in his face) Take 'em! (Joey makes a noise and jumps out of the way.) Joey, you can touch them! They're your underwear.
Chandler: You forbid me?
Chandler: I think you should go back with Gary. I dont wanna be the guy that breaks up a family, y'know when my parents split up, it was because of that guy. Whenever I would see him I was always think y'know Youre the reason, you are the reason why their not together. and I hated that guy. And it didnt matter how nice he was, or how happy he made my Dad.
Mark: Clever. (back to Rachel) So how are you?
Phoebe: Okay I cant let you do this! Shes lying to you.
Monica: So, you think you'll do it on his couch?
Joey: I couldnt help it! When a fist comes at your face, you duck! Look! (He goes to punch Ross, expecting him to duck, but he doesnt and Joey punches Ross. Gunther is amused.)
Chandler: So um, after you put the suggestion in the box, how long did it take for the roller skating thing to happen.
Rachel: Well of course we will help you decide! We will do anything we can to help you! Now, I would like to make a toast, to the future Mrs. Chandler Bing (A woman at the table behind them overhears Chandlers name and starts listening closer), my best friend, and truly one of the nicest people that
Ross: Uh, you weighted 200 pounds.
PHOEBE: [handing him the papers] Here you go. You know what, I just have one more question, um, if you had figured this out sooner and um, I had been around, do you think that I would have been the one who. . . no, um, I'm sorry, don't tell me, I don't th ink either answer would make me feel better.
Joey: (entering) (He clears his throat to get their attention.) Hey, Rach? Sorry to interrupt but umm, Phoebe wanted me to talk to you about a trip or something.
Ross: You know what? I know Chandler longer, so I always think of him as my best friend, but now... I may have to rethink some stuff...
Phoebe: Yeah! Or too, you could be two stockbrokers and youre-youre-youre rolling around naked on the trading floor and everybodys watching! (Ross looks at her.) It never happened.
Monica: (very excited) Oh, and you know who's selling a great apartment? Richard!
Ross: Sorry I ah, I scared you in there.
Phoebe: Thank you. (she tears up the gift certificate)
Chandler: Freedom! I want my freedom! Why wont you here me?! (Opens the door) Sophie, help me! Help me!! (Sophie stands up)
Ross: Hey, I'm more cop than you two!
Joey: Okay, Im all right, okay, but hey, could you just leave your lips? (She kisses him on the cheek and starts to leave.)
Ross: Really. It's always been you, Rach.
Salon girl: Ok. Very good. Have a seat right over here Mr. Bing and Sonia will be right with you.
Monica: I didnt think you could keep it a secret.
Monica: Ohh! Umm, Phoebe, I kinda need to talk to you about that. (Rachel excuses herself) Umm, well I-I-I think it might be time for me to take a step back from catering.
CHAN: Y'know, maybe this isn't such a big deal. Y'know, I mean, the way that I see it is you get a great job and you get to have sex. Y'know, I mean, throw in a tree and a fat guy and you've got Christmas.
Joey: (comes out holding the tape) Here's how I know you didn't watch the tape, ok? (puts it into the vcr) If you had seen what was on this tape, believe me, you would have some comments. Alright, now remember, I got paid a lot of money for this and it only aired in Japan. (presses play and he appears on the TV screen and a TV commercial begins)
Ross: And the reason I'm doing this is because I am Joey's friend. And if you were a good friend, you'd be doing the same thing.
Phoebe: Well, I can't give you a massage, because my licence has been revoked again!
Rachel: Because it is too damn hard Ross. I can't even begin to explain to you how much I'm gonna miss you. When I think about not seeing you every day, it makes me not want to go... Okay, so if you think that I didn't say goodbye to you because you don't mean as much to me as everybody else, you're wrong. It's because you mean more to me. So there, all right, there's your goodbye... Oh!
Phoebe: (To Joey) You are unbelievable! I spent so much time finding the perfect girl for you, you know. Mary Ellen is really smart and cute and loose.
(Joey turns around and sees his face on a poster in the subway. The poster says: What Mario isn't telling you...V.D., you never know who might have it. A variety of scenes are shown with the poster displayed all over New York City.)
Ross: (on the phone) Yes, hello. I have a question. Umm, I used your pen to draw on my friend's face. (Listens) A beard and a moustache. (Listens and laughs) Thank you. (Rachel turns around and glares at him.) No, she didn't think so. (Listens) I know it's like (turns and sees Rachel staring at him and quickly changes the subject) anyway, umm well make-up didn't cover it and we've tried everything to get it off and nothing's worked. What-what do we do? (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Oh! Okay. (Listens) Okay, thank you! (Rachel gets excited at his tone.) (Hangs up the phone) Yeah, it's not coming off.
Rachel: You didnt break up with that fireman?
Ross: How much did you pay for that?
Monica: (entering) (Gasps) How did you get in there?!
Monica: Here, let me show you. Okay, the towels are hanging next to the sink, and umm, you can use the fancy soap.