words in movies
Ross: No, but come on, were off to a great start arent we? I knew Id get you here fast, but this has got to be some kind of a record!
Phoebe: Oh you made it!
Monica: How are you doing?
Ross: Wait a minute! How-how the hell did you beat us here?
Monica: We took a cab. Did you guys walk?
Joey: Hey! You made it!
Rachel: Ross, you stay here and talk, Im gonna go have a baby.
Nurse: Right! We have a semi-private labor room waiting for you. So in just a minute
Chandler: Man, if only youd gotten here sooner. (Ross turns and glares at him.)
Ross: Well then wed be in a lot of trouble, you dont know where any countries are. (Rachel glares at him.) Okay. (He goes over to the desk followed by Rachel.) Uh, say would you umm Would you mind checking again to see if any umm, private rooms may have (Handing her some money) opened up?
Nurse: Would you like to see a semi-private room?
Dr. Long: Well youre only two centimeters dilated and we need to get to ten. Itll be a while.
Dr. Long: Ill be back in an hour to check you again.
Ross: Thank you.
Rachel: Thank you. (Dr. Long exits.) Well, I guess we have some time to kill.
Man: Thank you very much.
Ross: Hi! Hi, Im uh Ross. Im here to ruin this magical day for you.
Rachel: How are you?
Julie: Well, little Jamie here is our third. So, if you have questions or you need anything at all, just holler.
Ross: Umm say, I-I opened this earlier (The privacy screen) but let me give you guys some privacy.
Julie: Yeah, we are going to share every moment of this with you. And I think were gonna have some fun.
Rachel: Oh no, I really dont want any(He takes the picture)Oh! Thank you. Oh. Oh Ross
Monica: Hey, you wanna see something?
Monica: What?! Are you kidding me?! You-you-you think were ready to have a baby now?!
Joey: Youre ready to have a baby? My boys all grown up!
Chandler: But you said you were ready too.
Monica: Yeah but I was just screwing with you to try to get your voice all high and weird like mine is now!
Chandler: Yes, but havent you wanted a kid like forever?
Joey: (voice all high and weird) What?! Are you crazy?!
Julie: Have you felt Rachels cervix Ross?
Julie: Well, if you like you can feel Rachels and then feel mine to compare.
Ross: Uh yes! Thank you.
Ross: Hi! Im so glad youre here, but its gonna be a while. I-I wished youd called first.
Mrs. Geller: I actually needed to talk to you before the birth.
Mrs. Geller: I brought something that I want to give you, assuming of course that you want it. (She holds up an engagement ring.)
Ross: Ma, youre asking me to marry you?
Mrs. Geller: This is your grandmothers engagement ring, I want you to give it to Rachel.
Ross: Mom no, come on! Thank you.
Mrs. Geller: Honestly! Ross, this isnt just some girl you picked up in a bar and humped. A child should have a family.
Mrs. Geller: Just think about it. If you dont, Ill talk more about humping.
Rachel: Oh, thank you so much for coming. Ross, get in here!
Phoebe: Yeah. (Pause) Why arent you with Rachel?
Ross: Are you kidding? Look, were not gonna be together just because were having a baby. Okay?
Phoebe: But yknow what? It just seems that you two belong together.
Joey: I mean seriously, shes like the perfect woman. I mean I know she turned me down, but if she hadnt and wanted to be with me, I would take her in my arms and (Realizes everyone is staring.) I havent bummed you guys out like this in a while have I?
Rachel: Theyre having their baby! Its not fair Ross we got here first! Right after you left they wheeled her off into delivery. Oh but not before she gave me a juicy shot of little Jamie just crowning away.
Evil Bitch: Are you looking at her?!
Evil Bitch: Dont you look at her you sick bastard!
Evil Bitch: Shes in labor! You like that you sick son of a bitch!
Evil Bitch: See? See? It was because you were looking fat pervert!
Evil Bitch: You miss your girlfriend?
Ross: (to him) Hey! You wanna live to see your baby?!
Evil Bitch: Dont you talk to my husband like that you stupid bastard!
Monica: Oh good God! If you want a baby so bad just go steal it!
Monica: What is going on with you? Since when are you so crazy about babies?
Chandler: Were trying to get pregnant. (They start kissing, but Chandler stops it.) Yknow Im not really comfortable doing this in front of the babies. So, when do you want to start trying?
Joey: Come on you stupid machine! Come on!
Phoebe: All right, Ill see you downstairs then.
Man: Could you press up too please?
Phoebe: Sure! I feel so bad for you; I broke my leg once too.
Phoebe: Well, its a long story. Its kind of embarrassing. Lets just say there was a typographical error with a sex manual. (The guy laughs.) How about you?
Man: Yeah. Me. (The elevator door opens.) Oh hey, thats me. (Rolls onto the elevator.) Hey uh, I take it youre just visiting someone.
Man: Well umm, if you have sometime yknow and maybe you might want to visit someone else
Joey: (standing behind her) Uh, you gotta press the button. (Does so.)
Phoebe: (to the nurse) Excuse me? Could you help me with something? The patient Im looking for has a broken leg and is in a wheelchair. And umm, hes like early to mid-thirties, very attractive.
Nurse: I think I know who youre talking about.
Joey: Damnit woman were losing precious time! Now do you want this mans blood on your head?
Joey: Hands! It is absolutely essential that you tell me what room the man my assistant described is staying in. Hes a patient of mine, Ive been treating him for years!
Joey: 816, thank you!
Phoebe: Thank you. (Starts to exit.)
Monica: Umm, wait! Do you want to set the mood a little?
Chandler: Yes, 98.6. Youre gonna be fine.
Phoebe: Wait a second, or maybe you can go in first.
Phoebe: No not you, Dr. Drake Remoray. You can ask him questions and see whats he like. People tell doctors everything.
Joey: But you said he was this great guy!
Joey: You do attract some stinkers.
Rachel: Dr. Long, Ive been at this for seventeen hours! Three women have come and gone with their babies, you gotta give me some good news! How many centimeters am I dilated? Eight? Nine?
Dr. Long: We are moving along, just slowly. (Rachel lies back and sighs.) Dont worry, youre doing great. Ill be back soon. (Exits.)
Doctor: Oh my. Were gonna need to take you straight to the delivery room.
Joey: Hi! Im Dr. Drake Remoray and I have a few routine questions I need to ask you.
Joey: I know, but Im a neurologist. And just to be on the safe side, Dr. Wells wanted a more comprehensive overview of you status so he sent me.
Cliff: Cant you figure that out based on my date of birth?
Joey: Okay. And uh, are you married.
Joey: Oh really? So, 33 and still single, would you say you have commitment issues?
Cliff: Well uh if you must know Im a widower.
Joey: Hmm. Do you sleep with women and never call them again?
Joey: Excellent! Excellent! And uh, finally, are you into any weird stuff yknow, sexually?
Rachel: Okay! Okay wait! You listen to me! You listen to me! Since I have been waiting four women, thats four, one higher than the number of centimeters that I am dilated, have come and gone with their babies! Im next! Its my turn! Its only fair! And if you bring in one woman and she has her baby before me Im going to sue you! Not this hospital, Im going to sue you! And my husband (Points at Ross) hes a lawyer!
Janice: Hi! Hi sweetheart! This is my husband Sid, I dont think youve met him. Ross, Rachel, this is Sid. I nabbed him a year ago at the dermatologists office. Thank God for adult acne huh? (Does the laugh.)
Janice: Oh yknow what? You have to speak very loudly when youre talking to Sid, because hes almost completely deaf.
Ross: Oh there you go!
Janice: So? Congratulations you two, I didnt even know you got married.
Ross: Sid you lucky deaf bastard.
Monica: I cant believe this is taking so long. How are you doing?
Rachel: Oh not bad. Do you know that feeling when youre trying to blow a Saint Bernard out your ass?
Janice: Oh, this should be easy. I have a very wide pelvis. You remember Chandler.
Chandler: Janice I didnt even know you were pregnant! Whos the unwitting human whos essence youve stolen?
Janice: Its you. This is yours.
Phoebe: Okay Ive got one for you, if you had too which one would you rather eat, a seeing eye dog or a talking gorilla?
Cliff: Id have to say the talking gorilla, because at least I can explain to him that youre making me eat him.
Ross: Yknow what I think it is? I think youve made such a nice home for her over the last nine months that she just doesnt want to leave.
Rachel: Oh. Look at you making up crap for me. Oh God! (Starts another contraction as Dr. Long enters.)
Dr. Long: Twenty-one hours, youre a hero.
Rachel: Doctor you gotta do something! I think you gotta give me drugs or you gotta light a fire up in there and just smoke it out.
Dr. Long: Actually, I think youre ready to go to the delivery room.
Dr. Long: Ten centimeters, youre about to become a mom.
Cliff: Im telling you! The guy from that show was here in my room, asking me all these weird questions!
Phoebe: Cliff, do you really believe that a character from a TV show was here in your room?
Cliff: That-thats him! You know him?
Phoebe: Okay. Okay. IOkay umm this I-I sent my friend Joey in here to find out stuff about you. Umm yknow, if it helps you came off great. A lot better than Im coming off right now.
Cliff: I dont believe this. You got him to pretend he was some fake doctor?
Cliff: And then you tried to make me think that I was crazy.
Phoebe: Youre right, that was wrong. Im sorry. Im so sorry. Its just that I liked you so much. Can we just, can we just start over?
Joey: Uh, if I may? Umm-umm look, Cliff, you told me a lot of personal stuff about you, right? And maybe-maybe it would if-if would help if-if you knew some personal stuff about her. Uh, she was married to a gay ice dancer. Uh, she gave birth to her brothers triplets. Oh! Oh! Her-her twin sister used to do porn!
Phoebe: Umm, look we dont, we dont really know each other so it would be really easy to just forget about this, but there seems to be something between us. And I dont know about you but that doesnt happen to me a lot.
Ross: Sweetie youre doing great.
Ross: What? You do? You do? (Looks) Oh my God!
Dr. Long: Shes gonna be fine. Okay, shes in a more difficult position so youre gonna have to push even harder now. Go! Push!
Dr. Long: Rachel youre gonna have to push even harder, nothings happening!
Ross: Yes you can!
Ross: Hey! Hey! Come on! You can! I know you can do this! Lets go!
Rachel: I cant. Please, you do it for me.
Rachel: Are you okay?
Ross: You have no idea how much this hurts. (All of the women in the room turn and glare at him.) Keep going! Keep going!
Rachel: Oh hey you. Thanks for coming out of me. (The baby cries.) I know. Oh. Yeah. Oh, shes looking at me. Hi! I know you.
Monica: Oh my God! Shes amazing. Oh, oh Im so glad you guys got drunk and had sex!
Chandler: Its incredible, I mean one minute shes inside you and then 47 hours later here she is.
Phoebe: Okay, my turn. My turn. (Joey hands her to Phoebe.) Oh! Youre so cute! Oh, I could squeeze your little head! (Pause) I wont.
Rachel: So? You guys are all sleep deprived. I dont see you weeping because you put your slippers on the wrong feet. Oh God. (Starts to cry harder.)
Chandler: So, do you know what youre gonna call her yet?
Rachel: Yeah, and yknow what? I love them both, so why dont you just pick one and thatll be it.
Monica: Its okay honey, youll find a name.
Ross: Ugh, easy for you to say, you already know what your kids names are going to be.
Chandler: You do?
Rachel: Oh honey, but you love that name.
Monica: Yeah, but I love you more. Besides yknow, nothing goes with Bing. So Im screwed. I mean (Rachel hands Emma to Monica.) Oh, hi Emma. Yeah, thats you. Youre our little Em. Oh whats that honey? What? Oh, you want a little cousin? (To Chandler) You want a cousin right now?!
Monica: I know. Hey, do you realize we may have just changed our lives forever? We may have just started a family. Nine months from now we can be here, having our own baby.
Janice: Hes a keeper. How are you feeling?
Janice: Can I just say, I really admire what youre doing. Just raising her all alone.
Janice: Im telling you Rachel, listen to Janice. They all say theyre gonna be there until they start their real family.
Janice: I hate to be the one to say it, but honey you two (Her and Emma) are on your own.
Janice: Im gonna leave the three of you alone.
Ross: Man! Did you see the kid on that nose?
Phoebe: I just cant decide who she looks more alike, you or Rachel?
Ross: Oh what are you kidding? Shes gorgeous, its all Rachel.
Phoebe: Im sorry, for the last time, why arent you two together again? (Silence from Ross.) No, I know. I know, because youre not in that place. Which would be fine, except you totally are.
Phoebe: Yeah thats true. Yeah, you love her. You always have. You have a child together. There is no right answer.
Phoebe: I know. I know. I know. I know, and if you try to make it more you might wreck it.
Phoebe: Right. (Pause) Or you might get everything youve wanted since you were fifteen.
Joey: What are you talking about alone? What about Ross?
Joey: Hey, listen to me, listen to me you are never ever gonna be alone. Okay? I promise thats not gonna happen.
Rachel: Joey. Honey what would I do without you?
Joey: You dont have to worry about that okay?
Rachel: Oh, hon can you grab me my other box of tissues? Theyre right on that chair under Rosss coat.
{Transcribers Note: As with all the cliffhangers, there was no credits scene. There will be a ninth and final season of Friends starting sometime in September. See you then, have a good summer everyone.}
Ross: HEY, SHE'S FAST!! OKAY?!! (Chandler is so shocked at Ross's outburst that he drops his spoon and backs up) Oh! You-you think you can be beat me? Let's go! Outside!!
Monica: Thank you.
Mr. Zelner: Y'know what? I may regret this but uh, I'm going to give you a shot.
Joey: Don't you remember when we were jogging in the park and we saw that really pretty bird and wanted to take a pictureI didn't have my camera!
CHANDLER: Look, are you gonna be ok?
Joey: No, no, no! You kneed me in my misters!
Monica: Hey, the point is that he was at everyone of your swim meets and he was there cheering you on! Okay? Thats a, thats a pretty great dad.
Joey: No, no no no no. See. Each woman is different.You have to appreciate their uniqueness.
Chandler: Ino! I didn't read the box before I opened it. And you can't return a box after you've opened the box.
Charlie: And then, and then you said that thing about, about bringing the Mesozoic era in the 21st century.
Rachel: You can't move. You just... you just can't.
Monica: Well, there you go.
MRS. GREENE: Oh, I missed you kids. Well, should I put my coat in the bedroom?
Joey: I'm really sorry you guys.
Charlie: Did you get the grant?
Phoebe: Oh, the Angelica!! Go! Go! (She bangs on the cabs roof and it pulls away.) (To Ross) You didnt get the annulment?!!
Danny: Hey, hi, I need a ladle. You got a ladle?
Chandler: Sure, then you should get a mini skirt so you can really show it off.
CHANDLER: Monica, will you stop? This is nuts. Do you know how long it's gonna be before you actually have to deal with this problem? I mean, you don't even have a boyfriend yet. Joey, she does not look fat.
Chandler: (to Monica) I'm leaving you.
Rachel: (to Chandler) Can I talk to you alone for a minute?
Phoebe: Ok, I've got milk (takes thermos from her bag and starts to pour a cup) Here you go... (Rachel drinks straight from thermos) Oh!(Rachel finishes thermos) Better?
Laura: Are you friends with him?
Chandler: Well, Im sure you get another one at Ann Taylors.
Mike: (to Phoebe) So how've you been?
Monica: God bless you Chandler Bing!
Monica: What? You bet Id lose a nail?
Ross: You got it.
Eric: Great! But wh-whHow do you know where I live?
Rachel: Ross, I have been walking around like this since the plane! I canyou have so crossed a line. (Heads for the bathroom)
Mr. Zelner: It's really nice to see you again.
Ross: Oh, oh... maybe not you!
Phoebe: Oh my God! That guy at the counter is totally checking you out!
MONICA: Look honey, I wanted you to hook up with Ross as much as you did. But he's with her now and you're just gonna have to get over it.
Morse: You see, thats why I did so bad on this test. Im having a hard time concentrating. When youre up there (Points to the podium) and youre teaching and your face gets all serious you look so good. (In a sexy voice) You wear that tight little turtleneck sweater
Joey: Okay, for next time, what do you say?
Gene: You put this in your coffee.
Phoebe: Maybe your resolution is to not make fun of your friends, especially the ones who may soon be flying you to Europe for free on their own plane.
Mona: No, no. Listen, Ross is too nice to say anything, but this is his apartment, and, and, we gotta have some boundaries, so why dont you go back to your place and give us some privacy?
Ross: You did?
Joey: All right! Westminster Abbey! Hands down, best Abbey Ive ever seen. Hey! (Pushes Chandler in front of the camera.) Okay. What do you think of the Abbey, Chandler?
Chandler: The tall girl who wouldn't sleep with you?
Rachel: Okay please tell me that this is just one of your jokes that you do that I dont get.
Chandler: Yknow what? I dont trust you with this cake anymore! And I got it first, and Im takin it back! (Grabs the cheesecake and heads for his apartment.)
Phoebe: Are you kidding?
Ross: Seriously you guys, I can't believe you're going to spend 250 dollars on the lottery, I mean that's such a bunch of boohaki.
Owen: You were?
Roy: Are you talking about me?
Monica: Maybe, do you need a tissue?
Joey: My beers?! Look you guys, shes a very nice girl. Okay? We had a good time, but I justI dont see it going anywhere.
Roy: You were talking about me before! Look, I don't need this! I'm outta here! Where's my hat? (goes to get it) Look, I've been in this business for a long time!
Phoebe: Three hundred dollars, are you kidding?
Ross: Okay, Im gonna get your coat and then Ill-Ill put you in a cab.
Ross: If like the four of us could all yknow, hang out together. Uh, in fact Emilys coming into town this weekend, why dont you say we all have dinner? Say, Sunday night?
RACHEL: Well, we're not here to meet guys.� You have a boyfriend, I have a b. . . baby and a Ross.
Chandler: Okay, okay. You have to help us decide whose joke this is.
Ross: (shows Tag his sweater tag) Umm, I dont some Italian guy. Come on, read your own label. See you later.
Monica: No, you dont want this. I want to have your grandmothers cookie recipe.
Phoebe: I'm sorry, did you say all man or old man?
CHANDLER: No, look, that's it, it's over, I want you out, I want you out of the apartment now.
Ross: Look at you two, bonding, making us late for the airport so
Gary: Sweethart, but none of that matters if it's too soon for you. It's fine! We don't have to move in together. I justI want you to be happy
Rachel: Y’know what, you are mean boys, who are just being mean!
Monica: (chasing after him) Chandler! It happens to lots of guys! You-you-you were probably tired, you had a lot of champagne, dont worry about it!
Chandler: Aren't you...?
Chandler: (angrily) Look, if you did...
Ross: Listen Adrienne, you can't tell Chandler about this.
Ross: I didn't know you knew about that.
Joey: Where the hell have you been?!
David: Alright, but after this I want to see you outside. If the rain stops.
Ross: So, I just finished this fascinating book. By the year 2030, there'll be computers that can carry out the same amount of functions as an actual human brain. So theoretically you could download your thoughts and memories into this computer and-and-and live forever as a machine.
Chandler: Soo... you girls having fun?
Joey: Ok! Stop it you guys! Stop staring! You're freaking me out!
Ross: (annoyed) Oh, do you, do you really?
Joey: You a little sad about that sweetheart?
Pete: Let me tell you a story. When I set out to create Moss 865, do you think it just happened overnight? No. There was Moss 1, that burnt down my Dads garage, there was Moss 2 that would only schedule appointments in January, and 862 others that I learned from, just like I learned from this fight, never to let a guy stand on my neck.
Rachel: Ross, you are so pathetic. Why can't your son just play with his doll? (uses the Milk Master 2000 to pour milk into her cereal)
Monica: And people will think you own a Porsche because youre wearing the clothes?
Rachel: Yeah well what are you, his boyfriend?
Monica: See, this is why I told you never get involved with your assistant! And here is no such thing as keeping secrets when it comes to affairs. (To Chandler) Did you hear that Chandler? No such thing!
Ross: Well, the old lady died. And how do I know? Her dying wish was for one last kiss. But I dont care, (To Rachel) because you got the apartment. Yes!
Rachel: Oh, Ross, this is just so messed up! What�s wrong with us? You know when people hear about our situation theyAlways ask, �what, you live together but you�re not a couple? And you have a baby, isn�t that weird?� And I say �No.You know what, it�s not, because it works for us!� But you know this doesn�t work. In fact this is the opposite of working!
Monica: You were my first kiss ever?
Ross: Oh my God, I love you.
Young Ethan: You know, you read about it, you see it in the movies. Even when you practice it at home, man oh man, it is nothing like that.
Phoebe: C'mon Mike, you can beat her! Knock that dog off her head!
Phoebe: So... what do you say?
Phoebe: Good. It's just so hard, it's hard for me to ... let them go. I guess it just brings back memories, you know, from ... when I gave birth to my brother's triplets and I had to give them up. (Mike is shocked) I haven't told you about that yet, have I?
Chandler: You know, it haunts me? Up til now, the worst thing I ever saw, was my father doing tequila shots off the naked houseboy. After this, I would gladly make that my screensaver!
Phoebe: Oh, okay, I'm sorry, thank you for my azzz.
Chandler: Hey! Hold on a minute, hold on a second. Do you think these pearls are nice?
Monica: You don't know military time?
Chandler: Yes, on a scale from 1 to 10, 10 being the dumbest a person can look, you are definitely 19.
David: Well, i-it's okay. I-I-I understand... Well, s... well, are you happy with this guy?
Mr. Geller: Have a seat son. (You can see Mr. Geller sitting closer to the door as Chandler walks over and sits in his lap.) Hey!! (Chandler quickly jumps off and sits next to him with a shocked expression on his face.)
Ross: Seriously you guys, what's going on? What are these for?
Rachel: Joey, do you have peanut butter on the back of your head?
Phoebe: Oh great! And listen, could you do us a favor and not tell Chandler and Monica about this? Cause yknow umm, they dont-they dont have any kids of their own and-and this door was like a child to them.
Phoebe: You know, maybe she was just really spent from our talk. It was pretty intense.
Chandler: Hello...? Have you seen Joey's bat?