words in movies
Chandler: Yeah, it's like when you're a kid, and your parents put your dog to sleep, and they tell you it went off to live on some farm.
Joey: "Warden, in five minutes my pain will be over. But you'll have to live with the knowledge that you sent an honest man to die."
Joey: No no no, I am not giving you a cigarette.
Chandler: It's fine, it's fine. Look, do you wanna get this part, or not? Here.
Chandler: Don't think of it as a cigarette. Think of it as the thing that's been missing from your hand. When you're holding it, you feel right. You feel complete.
Monica: What did they do to you?
Phoebe: It's nothing, it's just- Okay. I'm going through my mail, and I open up their monthly, you know, STATEMENT-
Joey: What are you talking about? Keep it!
Rachel: Yeah, but if you spent it, it would be like shopping!
Phoebe: Okay. Okay, let's say I bought a really great pair of shoes. Do you know what I'd hear, with every step I took? 'Not-mine. Not-mine. Not-mine.' And even if I was happy, okay, and, and skipping- 'Not-not-mine, not-not-mine, not-not-mine, not-not-mine'...
Monica: We're with you. We got it.
Rachel: Chandler, what are you doing?
Phoebe: Oh, I can't believe you! You've been so good, for three years!
Ross: Hold on a second, alright? Just think about what you went through the last time you quit.
Chandler: What are you talking about? We love Schhteve! Schhteve was schhexy!.. Sorry.
Paula: Listen. As someone who's seen more than her fair share of bad beef, I'll tell you: that is not such a terrible thing. I mean, they're your friends, they're just looking out after you.
Paula: Well, you do realise the odds of that happening are a little slimmer if they never get to meet the guy..
Ross: Yeah, well, you didn't know Chi Chi.
Monica: Do you all promise?
Monica: (shouts to Chandler) Chandler? Do you promise to be good?
Joey: You can come in, but your filter-tipped little buddy has to stay outside!
Phoebe: 'Dear Ms. Buffay. Thank you for calling attention to our error. We have credited your account with five hundred dollars. We're sorry for the inconvenience, and hope you'll accept this- (Searches in her purse) -football phone as our free gift.' Do you believe this?! Now I have a thousand dollars, and a football phone!
Monica: (to all) Okay, please be good, please. Just remember how much you all like me.
Alan: I've heard schho much about all you guyschh!
Monica: (to Alan) Thanks. I'll call you tomorrow. (Alan exits, to all) Okay. Okay, let's let the Alan-bashing begin. Who's gonna take the first shot, hmm?
Rachel: And did you notice...? (She spreads her thumb and index finger.)
Chandler: Oh, yeah. I'd marry him just for his David Hasselhof impression alone. You know I'm gonna be doing that at parties, right? (Does the impression)
Ross: You know what I like most about him, though?
All: WE WON!! Thank you! Yes!
Monica: Can I ask you guys a question? D'you ever think that Alan is maybe.. sometimes..
Rachel: Well, no. That's impossible. You can never be too Alan.
Phoebe: I brought you alphabet soup.
Lizzie: Did you pick out the vowels?
Phoebe: Yes. But I left in the Ys. 'Cause, y'know, "sometimes y". Uh, I also have something else for you. (She searches in her purse.)
Phoebe: No, but would you like a thousand dollars and a football phone?
Lizzie: Weird Girl, what are you doing?
Phoebe: No, I want you to have it. I don't want it.
Lizzie: No, no, I ha-I have to give you something.
Lizzie: Would you like my tin-foil hat?
Phoebe: No. 'Cause you need that. No, it's okay, thanks.
Phoebe: Okay, alright, you buy me a soda, and then we're even. Okay?
Lizzie: Keep the change. (To Phoebe) Sure you don't wanna pretzel?
Chandler: So I have a flaw! Big deal! Like Joey's constant knuckle-cracking isn't annoying? And Ross, with his over-pronouncing every single word? And Monica, with that snort when she laughs? I mean, what the hell is that thing? ...I accept all those flaws, why can't you accept me for this?
Joey: Oh, (Imitating Ross) "you do, do you"?
Ross: You know, there's nothing wrong with speaking correctly.
Monica: Did you ever go out with a guy your friends all really like?
Monica: Can you believe it? ...Y'know what? I just don't feel the thing. I mean, they feel the thing, I don't feel the thing.
Paula: Honey.. you should always feel the thing. Listen, if that's how you feel about the guy, Monica, dump him!
Joey: Do you have any respect for your body?
Ross: Don't you realise what you're-you're doing to yourself?
Chandler: Hey, y'know, I have had it with you guys and your cancer and your emphysema and your heart disease. The bottom line is, smoking is cool, and you know it.
Rachel: (holding the phone out to Chandler) Chandler? It's Alan, he wants to speak to you.
Chandler: Really? He does? (taking the phone) Hey, buddy, what's up! Oh, she told you about that, huh. Well, yeah, I have one now and then. Well, yeah, now. Well, it's not that big- ..well, that's true,.. Gee, y'know, no-one- no-one's ever put it like that before. Well, okay, thanks! (He hands the phone back and stubs out his cigarette.)
Chandler: Joey ate my last stick of gum, so I killed him. Do you think that was wrong?
Ross: Hey Pheebs, you gonna have the rest of that Pop-Tart?.. Pheebs?
Monica: Okay. It's-it's about Alan. There's something that you should know. I mean, there's really no easy way to say this.. uh.. I've decided to break up with Alan.
Phoebe: You know.. you let your guard down, you start to really care about someone, and I just- I- (starts chewing her hair)
Monica: -but that wouldn't be fair to me, it wouldn't be fair to Alan- It wouldn't be fair to you!
Monica: Are you guys gonna be okay?
Alan: Yeah, I'm sorry too. But, I gotta tell you, I am a little relieved.
Alan: Yeah, well, I had a great time with you.. I just can't stand your friends.
Monica: He said he's really gonna miss you guys. (dubious look)
Ross: You had a rough day, huh.. c'mere. (She sits down and Ross strokes her forehead.)
Phoebe: (shouting as he leaves) If you never smoke again I'll give you seven thousand dollars!
Monica: Because... I'm Monica Geller. It was my credit card you were using.
Phoebe: I don't think you mean that.
Phoebe: I cant! I cant! Unless Well are you saying that-that you would move out if-if I didnt buy that lamp?
Ross: I've got to say you guys, that's an incredible gesture!
Rachel: Plus, you know, he is with Charlie now.
Ross: Hiiii-Ya!! (Chandler lies back down.) Im serious! Youre not walking out on my sister!
MRS. GELLER: So Jack, you ever think about trading me in for a younger model?
Joey: I was tryin to make a sale!! Oh, man, if I ever run into that guy again, do you know what Im gonna do?
Ross: You mean that?
Zack: You guys don't have people for dinner a lot, huh?
PHOEBE: [entering the kitchen from the party] That's funny, no. Cadillac, cataract, I get it, no I get it, you stay out there.
Monica: Oh my god, where's my purse? No, you know what? I can replace everything in there. Get that binder, and let's go!
Phoebe: You too. And Ursula?! It was really nice meeting you tonight!!
Rachel: Amy, you know what? I was thinking that maybe now it'd be a good time for us to sit down and, you know, talk about your future.
Rachel: Right! Right! I-I actually meant in your spare time, do you cook? Do you ski? Or do you just hang out with your wife or girlfriend?
Chandler: I didnt know you read tea leaves.
Chandler: (to Rachel) Uh, Rach... I think I have something that belongs to you. (shows her the cuffs)
Woman No. 2: I thought you wanted to adopt your cat.
Joey: ..ah, what're you doing here? I've been trying to call you.
Rachel: Hi, Im Rachel Green. What can I do for you Joshua?
Ross: And I can even understand that you couldnt tell Rachel, but why couldnt you tell me, huh? You had all day to and you didnt.
Joey: Hey! Uh, this is just to give you an idea. Okay well, we can put screens here, (In front of the crib.) so that the baby has privacy, and-and-and maybe a mobile over the crib. And uhOh look! Heres a baby monitor (Holds it up), which until the baby comes we can use as walkie-talkies. Huh?
Joey: Can I ask you something? Uhm, what's it like there?
Monica: Youre not gonna mess it up.
Ross: (entering) Hi! Sorry Im late. Were you sleeping?
Phoebe: OK so isn't there a little part of you that wants to get up there?
Chandler: No-no! This is my fiancee (Phoebe) and her heart was set on that ring. You dont want to break her heart now do you?
Rachel: So Ross, we went out for two years, and you never told me you were in an I Hate Rachel club.
Chandler: You think?
Ross: Monica, whatever you do, do not drop that ball!
Chandler: Okay so you mean no as in, "Gee Chandler, what an interesting idea. Lets discuss it before we reject it completely."
Joey: "Whered you grow up," its so simple!
Joey: Okay, fine, I will bring you a tape, huh? (Walks away)
Joey: Whoa-whoa-whoa! Before you start handing out wedding rings and planning bachelor parties, dont you have to decide who your best man is gonna be?
Monica: You bet that Id screw up?! So all that stuff about hiring me because I was good was
Phoebe: Thank you. (Starts to exit.)
Phoebe: That woman at the game didn't know what she was talking about. Mike, obviously you have balls.
Chandler: Can you people not see me?! (He waves his arms around to get their attention.)
Monica: (to Phoebe) Remember that guy from cooking school I told you about that put cilantro with everything?
JOEY: No, but with this new car smell, you'll think you do.
Ross: Okay, (reading the card) Fonzy gives you two thumbs up, collect two cool points. Yeah.
Joey: You knew about that?
Rachel: Now, that-that was a good thing that I told you, right?
Monica: What the Yes youre too late! Where was all this three years ago?!
Rachel: Yeah! Right! Okay, Ill see you guys later. (starts to leave) Woo hoo!
Rachel: Doctor you gotta do something! I think you gotta give me drugs or you gotta light a fire up in there and just smoke it out.
Kate: Last night was wonderful. But I-I cant stay here just for you.
Ross: (coming back in with Rachel) Hey, you guys! What do you, what do you think about making that beach trip an annual thing?
Ross: You wanna, you wanna grab some coffee?
Monica: Phoebe why dont you just call her? You obviously want to.
Monica: Are you sure?
Joey: No, its not. I mean you-you made me your best man and I totally let you down!
Chandler: I can save you time ladies, Im right here.
Chandler: So what are you gonna do?
Chandler: Oh, yeah, you have to tell her.
Phoebe: Oh my God! (Starts reading them.) Dizziness, nervousness, drowsiness, facial swelling, nausea, headacheHeadache. Vomiting, stomach bleeding, liver damage! Now okay, I dont recall any of this coming up when you gave me these little death capsules! Oh Im sorry, extra strength death capsules!
Mr. Treeger: You said there was a gas leak in here.
Julie: Yes. Oh my god, are you kidding? Ross is so crazy about you, and I really wanted you to like me, and, it's probably me being totally paranoid, but I kinda got the feeling that maybe you don't.
Rachel: You think it looked amazing?
Chandler: You pick one.
Joey: Wow, thats in like 20 minutes. Youd better get dressed.
Joey: So yknow Ross its funny cause, you look familiar to me too. Have you ever been married?
Monica: Joey, we had a deal. That-thats why youre here! Ive got to fire you!
Phoebe: Are you lying? Is this like that time you tried to convince us that you were a doctor?
Chandler: So, what do you think?
Phoebe: Are you okay?
Emily: Oh. (Shes shocked and hugs him.) Thank you. (She boards the plane.)
Monica: No, no its going to be great. Really! Mom, Dad, when I got married, one of the things that made me sure I could do it was the amazing example the two of you set for me. For that and so many other things I want to say thank you. I know I probably dont say it enough, but I love you. (Pretends to cry hoping her parents will join her.) When I look around this room, Im-Im saddened by the thought of those who could not be here with us. Nana, my beloved grandmother who would so want to be here, but she cant because shes dead. As is our dog Chi-Chi. I mean look how cute she is. (Holds up the picture and pretends to cry again). Was. (To an old man by the stage.) Do me a favor and pass this to my parents. Remember shes dead. Okay, her and Nana, gone. Wow! Hey does anybody remember when Debra Winger had to say goodbye to her children in Terms of Endearment? (Chandler covers his ears) Didnt see that? No movie fans?! You want to hear something sad? The other day I was watching 60 Minutes these orphans in Romania, who have been so neglected, they were incapable of love. (Waits for people to cry, but doesnt get any tears.) You people are made of stone! Heres to mom and dad! Whatever!
David: Well... just so you know... hearing it wasn't exactly a Vladnik carnival either... Can we at least hug goodbye?
Rachel: Well, I... you know, I-I-I don't know what to say... I mean, I never thought of you as a guy who needed his men to be men. You know, 'cause I gotta tell you Ross, it not like you just came in from branding cattle.
Monica: (chasing her) Youd better run!
Phoebe: What did you do on yours?
Drew: I didnt think you were gay. I do now.
Rachel: Oh, well, I...It's kind of weird talking to you about this, but...
Rachel: Do you really want an award you didnt win?
Chandler: All right, think about it. Now remember when you were going out with that girl Donna and you guys broke up. Remember how horrible it was when you guys bumped into each other at the supermarket?
Ross: You all right?
Phoebe: Well, if you don't... if you don't hold it in, you don't get all the nutrients.
Phoebe: You ok?
Rachel: So, you had a good day huh? Big commission; picked up a daddy.
Excuse me, excuse me! Yeah, noisy boys! (They stop talking and look up) Is it something that you would like to share with the entire group?
Rachel: No! Yknow what? No! No! You thing was so stupid anyway, this was ridiculousWere gonna flip a coin! (Phoebe gasps.) All right?! (She flips the coin.) Heads! (Looks at the coin and grunts in disgust.)
Jennifer: You just know.
Phoebe: Well you certainly cant give her that stupid gumball ring.
Ross: Marcel, c'mere, c'mere. (He sits down and Marcel jumps down and sits beside him) Well buddy, this is it. There's just a coupla things I want to say. I'm really gonna miss you, and I'm never gonna forget about you. You've been more than just a pet to me, you've been more like a be- (Marcel climbs down and starts humping his leg) Okay, Marcel, please, could you leave my leg alone? Could you just stop humping me for two seconds?! Marcel, would- okay, just take him away. Just take him.
Ross: Hey, so uh, y'know how there's something I wanted to talk to you about?
Mike: That's great! You changed you name?
Ross: Aw, we-we are so (Motions that theyre connected.) So umm, well I-I-I like you and I-I love umm, yknow hanging out with you. And I mean-Im having a lot of fun. (He pauses and thinks there might be more, but decides there isnt.)
Monica: I'm sorry, I don't understand what you just said.
Monica: Look, I wanted to tell Im-Im sorry you lost.
Susan: (not taking her eyes off Carol) Hello Ross. (Takes off her coat and hands it to him.) I love what youve done with this space.
Monica: Oh my God, me too! Oh! Oh, we'd be like friends-in-law! Y'know what the best part is? The best part is that you already know everything about him! I mean, it's like starting on the fifteenth date!
Roger: You too, sir.
Chandler: That's so funny, 'cause I was thinking you look more like Joey Tribbiani, man slash woman.
Monica: Oh, wow, can you believe you're like three weeks away?
Joey: Hey! You guys! Youre not gonna believe this! I just got off the phone with my agent
Chandler: I know it. You know, I'm totally gonna ask her out.
Frank: Hey, how do you guys get anything done?
Monica: Well, when you first met Barry, you flitted off to Vail.
Rachel: You are. Well, um... We, we, we were just... Wow!