words in movies
Ross: How weird is that? Yknow? Youre moving in with me and have the one thing I dont have. Its like uh, in a way you-you complete me (Phoebe glares at him) kitchen.
Ross: (in an Australian accent) You complete me kitchen, matey!
Phoebe: Ross, I know what youre thinking.
Phoebe: That shes gonna move in with you and maybe then shell fall in love with you and then when she finds out youre already married, shell just be happy. Yknow? Youre just, youre very sad.
Ross: Oh my God! I-I see what this is! You are in love with Rachel!
Ross: Of course! It all adds up! I mean you youre obsessed with her. Its always, "Ross, what are you gonna do about Rachel?" "Ross, why-why are you moving in with Rachel?" "When are you gonna confess your secret marriage to Rachel?" You want her!
Monica: (under her breath) That youre a liar. (Hides the candlesticks in a drawer.)
Ross: (on phone) No-no-no, thats great! Ill be there Monday. And thank you again! (Listens) Okay. (Hangs up) (To All) Umm, that was the head of the Paleontology department at N uh, Y, uh U!
Phoebe: Oh! Yeah, yknow you and Ross are still married.
Phoebe: Well, you know that psychic I see?
Phoebe: Yeah, and I know you guys dont know a lot about psychic readings, but that one is pretty much the worse one you can get.
Joey: I cant believe she would say that too you.
Rachel: Yeah honey you dont believe her do you?
Chandler: Just out of curiosity did she tell you how youre gonna go?
Ross: Hey uh, well, todays my first lecture and I kinda wanted to try it out on you guys, do you, do you mind?
Chandler: Why dont you open with a joke?
Chandler: Wait a minute, hold the phone! Youre not talking about Chuckles University?!
Rachel: Ross, hey you know what might make it less boring?
Ross: Thank you!
Ross: I-I-I dont even know why I bother to talk to you guys about it. Yknow what? Im just gonna do it on my own with no naked chicks.
Chandler: Yes, you got something from the Screen Actors Guild.
Joey: Ooh, its probably a residual check, hey can you open it for me, Im kinda .
Chandler: Okay, its not a check. Theyre saying your health insurance expired because, you didnt work enough last year.
Chandler: Okay, make sure you look both ways before you cross the street.
Joey: (mocks him, in a whiney voice) look both ways before you cross the street. (Turns and walks headlong into the closed door.)
Rachel: Hey Pheebs, youre still alive! How are you doing?
Phoebe: Ugh, its so exhausting waiting for death. Ohh, by the way, do you think you could(Groans, hacks, and then freezes with her eyes open and her tongue hanging out.)
Rachel: Pheebs, what-what are you doing?
Phoebe: I was preparing you for mydidnt you think I was dead? Did that not come off?
Rachel: Oh yeah, scared the hell out of me. I thought wed lost you forever. Pheebs, you lie down?
Phoebe: Yeah, thanks. And listen, can you do me a favor? Could you just umm, wake me up in a couple hours, yknow if you can.
Rachel: Did-did you take these back?
Ross: I knew all I had to do was let the material speak for itself. Everyones all, "Ross you have to be funny and sexy." Well, I proved them wrong! And now, Im gonna pass the news onto Joey and Chandler.
Monica: That youre not funny or sexy?
Estelle: Well! Well! Well! Joey Tribbiani! So you came back huh? They think they can do better but they all come crawling back to Estelle!
Joey: What are you talkin about? I never left you! Youve always been my agent!
Joey: Estelle, you gotta get me some work. I-I lost my health insurance.
Estelle: Well, I think uhh, someone out there may have been bad mouthing you all over town.
Chandler: Thats great, but shouldnt you be on the toilet right now?
Chandler: Whats wrong with you?
Chandler: This sounds like a hernia. You have toyou-you go to the doctor!
Joey: Why did I have to start working out again? (Looks at the weights he was using.) Damn you 15s!
Monica: What the hell are you doing?!
Ross: Look, I was nervous! You guys had me all worried I was going to be boring! I got up there and they were all like staring at me. I opened my mouth and this British accent just came out.
Ross: Will you-will you please?
The Professor: Do you have a moment to talk about your lecture?
Ross: (in accent) Right, will you excuse us for one moment? (Takes Monica aside.) (In his normal voice.) What are you doing?
Monica: (normal voice) Oh, you can have an accent and I cant?! (To an exiting student in accent.) Top O the morning to ya laddies!
Chandler: Hey, will you grab me a cruller? (Joey starts to groan and get up.) Sit down! Will you go to the hospital?!
Chandler: I will loan you the money. Just go to the hospital and lets just get that thing pushed back in.
Joey: Thank you, but it would take me forever to pay you that money back and I dont want that hanging over my head. Okay? Besides, as soon as my insurance kicks in I can get all the free operations I want! Yeah, Im thinking Ill probably start with that laser eye surgery too.
Joey: Look, Im telling you if I put my hand on my stomach right here (He puts his hand down his pants, like Al Bundy on Married With Children always used to do.) it doesnt hurt that bad.
Phoebe: Hey! Maybe youll die!
Monica: You stole them from me!
Rachel: You stole them from me!!
Monica: You just wanna each take one?
Monica: Why dont you phase it out? Yeah, fade the accent out and people will think youre, yknow, that youre adjusting to life in America.
Rachel: Of course theyre listening to you! Everybody listens to you.
Ross: Monica you really think I should try this phasing out thing?
Monica: I think you look fine.
Casting Director #1: Whenever youre ready.
Joey: (in a gravely, painful voice) Okay. "Hey, Timmy, Ive got a surprise for you."
Casting Director #1: Hold it. Im sorry, the surprise is a new swing set, if you could play it a little less intense?
Joey: Oh yeah, sure, no problem, Ill justhold on one second. (He turns around and puts his hand in his pants and groans in relief.) (In a relaxed voice.) "Hey Timmy, Ive got a surprise for you!"
Casting Director #2: Thats where you pick up the bag.
Casting Director #2: No, the line is pick a bag, so you need to pick up the bag.
Casting Director #3: You mean dying man?
Rachel: Okay! (Picks up the phone and starts dialing.) (In an Irish accent) "Hello Ross, this is Dr. McNeeley from the Fake Accent University, wed like you to come on board with us full time! (Hangs up.)
Rachel: Really?! How do you know?
Chandler: Listen, Im really glad you got the part.
Joey: (barely audible through the pain) Thank you.
Chandler: But are you sure you can do this?
Joey: Hi Alex! (to the director) And uh, as you can see my hands are not in my pants. (Holds them both up.)
The Director: Cut! Alex, remember youre supposed to cry. Can you cry for us this time?
The Director: All right! Lets try this again! You ready Joe?
Joey: Ah, just one thing umm, is it all right with you if I, if I scream right up until you say action?
Chandler: Im sorry! Hey-hey Joe, why dont you uh, lift up your shirt? (He does.) Take a look at this kiddo. (Alex finally starts crying.) We have a crying child! Roll the damn cameras!
Ross: (British) Come again? Whats-whats this nonsense? (Giggles.) (American.) All right, Im-Im not English. Im from Long Island. I was really nervous and the accent just uh, just came out. Im sorry. So, if we could just get back to the lecture. Umm, were there any questions? (Everyone raises their hands) About paleontology. (They all put their hands down.) All right, look I was just trying to make a good first impression. Obviously, I screwed up. But what you guys think of me is really important because Im-Im hoping to get a permanent job here. So if you just give me another chance to make a good impression
Rachel: Ross!! Are you crazy?! I am still your wife!! What, were you just never gonna tell me?!! What the hell is wrong with you?!!!! Ugh, I could just kill you!!!!
Phoebe: Have you really done this before?
Joey: Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! You just take a big, big swing. Now, dont hold back. (He dons his protective helmet (Why, I have no clue.) and Phoebe picks up a wooden baseball bat and starts to swing as Chandler and Monica enter.)
Chandler: What are you doing?
Monica: Yknow, you called me that before so I-I took the liberty of fashioning a star out of aluminum foil. Now, no pressure, you like my cookies, you give me the star. (Hands it to her.)
Phoebe: Ooh, honey. You stink at lying.
ROSS: I'm tellin' you. You can't do this.
Chandler: Well, last time I saw him he was heading out the door with the brides maid and a bucket of strawberries. So uh, youre not still upset about what that guy told ya are ya?
Joey: Yeah, yknow at first I thought we could talk about this yknow, work it out, but uh, seeing you two together I dont think I
Ross: When I happened to look through the window and I see you kissing a guy you know, for what? A week?
Phoebe: Wow! You do?
Gert: Faster! Youre not going fast enough!
ROSS: Dollars? You spent $1200 dollars on a plastic bird?
Joey: You lied to me!
Joey: And you couldnt think of anything else?!
Joey: Thats your move? Boy Rach, youre lucky youre hot.
ROSS: Not, not, not every night. You know, and... and it's not like I didn't try, Rachel, but things got in the way, y'know? Like, like Italian guys or ex-fiances or, or, or Italian guys.
Phoebe: Am I? Really? Am I? Well, why don't you cook Thanksgiving dinner and prove me wrong! Well, think about it, think about it, you'll be trying to top than you did last year. You'd be in competition... with yourself.
Chandler: Oh relax man, relax. Youre looking a little flushed.
Joey: Im not telling, youll have to see it on TV!
Rachel: Well I assume the ah, happy couple isnt up yet. Did you guys hear them last night?
Mr. Geller: Sweetheart, we love you just as much as Ross! Now, Im sorry about everything that happened and Id probably never be able to make it up to you, but heres a start. (He hands her a small box.)
The Photographer: (taking pictures) Great! Thats great Monica! Great! Now, Chandler, you want to give us a smile?
Monica: I can not see him? I mean, you can't tell me what to do!
Chandler: Okay, you ready for the last picture?
Mona: Now, do you think it should say, "Love Ross and Mona?"
Rachel: Chandler, can you give us a minute?
Joey: Hey youre right. Yeah, its kinda been like us again a little bit.
Ross: You do?
Monica: Hey, we can take her back with you if you want.
Carol: Do you want to know?
Cop: (stopping her) Hey, wait a second! So wait, what precinct are you with?
Chandler: Of course I will call you. I love you.
MONICA: Ok, which one of us do you think is gonna be the first one to get married?
Monica: Really you can do that?
Chandler: What are you doing?
Monica: Great! Well Rachel, the reason why I wont let you drive the Porsche is because youre a terrible driver. There! That wasnt about the wedding.
PHOEBE: Oh, you are so much the smitten kitten. You should ask him out.
Phoebe: (on intercom) Hey, do you need to get in? Here you go.
Rachel: I, uh, think you already are.
Monica: Spoon? (Hands him one and he tastes it.) So, what do you think?
Ross: Yknow what?! It doesnt matter! It doesnt matter what you believe! What matters is what happened!
RACHEL: [on phone] Ross, hi, it's Rachel. I'm just calling to say that um, everything's fine and I'm really happy for you and your cat who, by the way, I think you should name Michael. And, you know, ya see there I'm thinking of names so obviously, I am over you. I am over you and that, my friend, is what they call closure. [hangs up and tosses phone in the ice bucket]
JOEY: Can't help you, I'm not wearing any.
Joey: Oh great, that'd be great. Thank you.
Ross: Can you believe that?
Alan: Yeah, well, I had a great time with you.. I just can't stand your friends.
Chandler: You have every reason to be upset. We did lie. But only because we've been waiting and trying to have a baby for so long. Now we don't know how long it's gonna be before we can get another chance again.
Phoebe: Ill go with you
Chandler: Calm down? Calm down? You set me up with the woman that I've dumped twice in the last five months!
Dr. Stryker Remoray: Good morning. (He walks over to the bed, leans down, and whispers to him.) Drake, its your brother Stryker. Can you hear me?
Monica: Hey! Mrs. Altman was the kind of woman you could tell she used to be pretty.
ROSS: I told you there was going to be sub-titles.
JADE: Oh, you know, the usual, teaching aerobics, partying way too much. Oh, and in case you were wondering, those are my legs on the new James Bond poster.
Phoebe: Were you guys making fun of Parker?
ROSS: No, no, I don't wanna put it off, I just, God I just, I spent last year being so unbelievably miserable, ya know, and now, now I'm actually happy. You know, I mean, really happy. I just, I just don't wanna, I don't wanna mess it up, ya know.
Man: Where did you have it?
Ross: Dad, we-we cant believe youre selling the house.
RACHEL: What are you, what are you doin'?
Joey: Maybe now you can actually do it. You know? You can finally get over her.
Monica: Okay, just so you know, I'm gonna be ovulating from tomorrow until the sixth, so don't touch yourself in the next 48 hours.
Phoebe: Why dont you just try one?
Rachel: Uh, I don't have any brothers so I don't know, but uh, did you guys wrestle?
Rachel: Oh! (Opens the door to reveal a ballerina) Well youre just the prettiest ballerina Ive ever seen.
Chandler: What are you doin?
MONICA: Because that's where the party is you goon. See this is just the staging area.
Aunt Lisa: Ill bet you looked beautiful
Rachel: Alright, look, I have to go. I love you, and I will call you the minute I get to Paris.
Phoebe: And then for forgetting to invite you to it.
Joey: Uh, hey, Rach let me ask you something. Uh, I was just over there talking to Monica and Chandler, boy they are really tight.
Phoebe: You think?
Phoebe Sr: Take it easy--if you want, theres cookies on the counter, or, or--sangria! (jumps up) I can make sangria!
Parker: You do?!
Mr. Geller: So, I think youre boxes are over here. (They walk over to them.)
PHOEBE: What is this obsessive need you have to make everyone agree with you? No, what's that all about? I think, I think maybe it's time you put Ross under the microscope.
Chandler: You guys wanna eat here?
Josh: So I'll see you at the party? Beer's beer man, 24, 7!!
Steve: Okay, you got your free food! You ruined everyone's fun! Don't you think it's time you went home?!
Rachel: well watching sharks? Are you sure that's what he was doing?
Chandler: You know, we dont really take advantage of living in the city.
Mrs. Geller: Ross, why dont you give us your toast now?
Joey: How do you know about that story?!
Mrs. Geller: Youre not going to say anything? On our 35th wedding anniversary
Joey: Oh-oh-oh, yeah! (He grabs some towels and takes them to him.) That's right, you take good care of those babies!
Chandler: Any chance you are trying to pick a fight to make all this easier?
Hooker: Whats taking you boys so long?
Joey: Oh you know uh Kash, really liked you the other day. He said he thought you were charming.
RACHEL: Oh, what do you, you want me to stop seeing him, is that what you want?
Chandler: Well, lets just say its ironic how footage of someone being born can make you want to kill yourself.
Joey: Hey, Mr. Bing. That uh, hotel you stayed at called. Said someone left an eyelash curler in your room.
Chandler: Yes you did! Admit it! You freaked out!
Joey: Yeah you are baby.
Ross: Whyd you say no?
Ross: Im telling you its totally unconstituional.
Phoebe: Oh, hey, Mon, do you still have your like old blouses and dresses from high school?
Rachel: Joey, how do you make that dirty?
Passenger: (Frustrated he takes his headphones off.) Oh, oh oh!! Im sorry, can I interrupt? You know I just want to say..That you are a horrible, horrible person.
RACHEL: Whoa, look at you, you did pretty well.
Chandler: Yeah or also when you don't have somebody breathing down your neck ALL THE LIVE LONG DAY!!
Gunther: Can I get you anything?
Joey: Uh huh, sure, yeah. How can you not remember me?
Monica: That's Paul's watch. You just put it back where you found it. Oh boy. Alright. Goodnight, everybody.
Paleontologist: (merrily) Ok Geller. Last day of the conference, you know what happens to the keynote speaker.
Phoebe: Well, there's a spot open for only one groomsman and you have to choose between Ross and Chandler. So good luck with that.