words in movies
Ross: How weird is that? Yknow? Youre moving in with me and have the one thing I dont have. Its like uh, in a way you-you complete me (Phoebe glares at him) kitchen.
Ross: (in an Australian accent) You complete me kitchen, matey!
Phoebe: Ross, I know what youre thinking.
Phoebe: That shes gonna move in with you and maybe then shell fall in love with you and then when she finds out youre already married, shell just be happy. Yknow? Youre just, youre very sad.
Ross: Oh my God! I-I see what this is! You are in love with Rachel!
Ross: Of course! It all adds up! I mean you youre obsessed with her. Its always, "Ross, what are you gonna do about Rachel?" "Ross, why-why are you moving in with Rachel?" "When are you gonna confess your secret marriage to Rachel?" You want her!
Monica: (under her breath) That youre a liar. (Hides the candlesticks in a drawer.)
Ross: (on phone) No-no-no, thats great! Ill be there Monday. And thank you again! (Listens) Okay. (Hangs up) (To All) Umm, that was the head of the Paleontology department at N uh, Y, uh U!
Phoebe: Oh! Yeah, yknow you and Ross are still married.
Phoebe: Well, you know that psychic I see?
Phoebe: Yeah, and I know you guys dont know a lot about psychic readings, but that one is pretty much the worse one you can get.
Joey: I cant believe she would say that too you.
Rachel: Yeah honey you dont believe her do you?
Chandler: Just out of curiosity did she tell you how youre gonna go?
Ross: Hey uh, well, todays my first lecture and I kinda wanted to try it out on you guys, do you, do you mind?
Chandler: Why dont you open with a joke?
Chandler: Wait a minute, hold the phone! Youre not talking about Chuckles University?!
Rachel: Ross, hey you know what might make it less boring?
Ross: Thank you!
Ross: I-I-I dont even know why I bother to talk to you guys about it. Yknow what? Im just gonna do it on my own with no naked chicks.
Chandler: Yes, you got something from the Screen Actors Guild.
Joey: Ooh, its probably a residual check, hey can you open it for me, Im kinda .
Chandler: Okay, its not a check. Theyre saying your health insurance expired because, you didnt work enough last year.
Chandler: Okay, make sure you look both ways before you cross the street.
Joey: (mocks him, in a whiney voice) look both ways before you cross the street. (Turns and walks headlong into the closed door.)
Rachel: Hey Pheebs, youre still alive! How are you doing?
Phoebe: Ugh, its so exhausting waiting for death. Ohh, by the way, do you think you could(Groans, hacks, and then freezes with her eyes open and her tongue hanging out.)
Rachel: Pheebs, what-what are you doing?
Phoebe: I was preparing you for mydidnt you think I was dead? Did that not come off?
Rachel: Oh yeah, scared the hell out of me. I thought wed lost you forever. Pheebs, you lie down?
Phoebe: Yeah, thanks. And listen, can you do me a favor? Could you just umm, wake me up in a couple hours, yknow if you can.
Rachel: Did-did you take these back?
Ross: I knew all I had to do was let the material speak for itself. Everyones all, "Ross you have to be funny and sexy." Well, I proved them wrong! And now, Im gonna pass the news onto Joey and Chandler.
Monica: That youre not funny or sexy?
Estelle: Well! Well! Well! Joey Tribbiani! So you came back huh? They think they can do better but they all come crawling back to Estelle!
Joey: What are you talkin about? I never left you! Youve always been my agent!
Joey: Estelle, you gotta get me some work. I-I lost my health insurance.
Estelle: Well, I think uhh, someone out there may have been bad mouthing you all over town.
Chandler: Thats great, but shouldnt you be on the toilet right now?
Chandler: Whats wrong with you?
Chandler: This sounds like a hernia. You have toyou-you go to the doctor!
Joey: Why did I have to start working out again? (Looks at the weights he was using.) Damn you 15s!
Monica: What the hell are you doing?!
Ross: Look, I was nervous! You guys had me all worried I was going to be boring! I got up there and they were all like staring at me. I opened my mouth and this British accent just came out.
Ross: Will you-will you please?
The Professor: Do you have a moment to talk about your lecture?
Ross: (in accent) Right, will you excuse us for one moment? (Takes Monica aside.) (In his normal voice.) What are you doing?
Monica: (normal voice) Oh, you can have an accent and I cant?! (To an exiting student in accent.) Top O the morning to ya laddies!
Chandler: Hey, will you grab me a cruller? (Joey starts to groan and get up.) Sit down! Will you go to the hospital?!
Chandler: I will loan you the money. Just go to the hospital and lets just get that thing pushed back in.
Joey: Thank you, but it would take me forever to pay you that money back and I dont want that hanging over my head. Okay? Besides, as soon as my insurance kicks in I can get all the free operations I want! Yeah, Im thinking Ill probably start with that laser eye surgery too.
Joey: Look, Im telling you if I put my hand on my stomach right here (He puts his hand down his pants, like Al Bundy on Married With Children always used to do.) it doesnt hurt that bad.
Phoebe: Hey! Maybe youll die!
Monica: You stole them from me!
Rachel: You stole them from me!!
Monica: You just wanna each take one?
Monica: Why dont you phase it out? Yeah, fade the accent out and people will think youre, yknow, that youre adjusting to life in America.
Rachel: Of course theyre listening to you! Everybody listens to you.
Ross: Monica you really think I should try this phasing out thing?
Monica: I think you look fine.
Casting Director #1: Whenever youre ready.
Joey: (in a gravely, painful voice) Okay. "Hey, Timmy, Ive got a surprise for you."
Casting Director #1: Hold it. Im sorry, the surprise is a new swing set, if you could play it a little less intense?
Joey: Oh yeah, sure, no problem, Ill justhold on one second. (He turns around and puts his hand in his pants and groans in relief.) (In a relaxed voice.) "Hey Timmy, Ive got a surprise for you!"
Casting Director #2: Thats where you pick up the bag.
Casting Director #2: No, the line is pick a bag, so you need to pick up the bag.
Casting Director #3: You mean dying man?
Rachel: Okay! (Picks up the phone and starts dialing.) (In an Irish accent) "Hello Ross, this is Dr. McNeeley from the Fake Accent University, wed like you to come on board with us full time! (Hangs up.)
Rachel: Really?! How do you know?
Chandler: Listen, Im really glad you got the part.
Joey: (barely audible through the pain) Thank you.
Chandler: But are you sure you can do this?
Joey: Hi Alex! (to the director) And uh, as you can see my hands are not in my pants. (Holds them both up.)
The Director: Cut! Alex, remember youre supposed to cry. Can you cry for us this time?
The Director: All right! Lets try this again! You ready Joe?
Joey: Ah, just one thing umm, is it all right with you if I, if I scream right up until you say action?
Chandler: Im sorry! Hey-hey Joe, why dont you uh, lift up your shirt? (He does.) Take a look at this kiddo. (Alex finally starts crying.) We have a crying child! Roll the damn cameras!
Ross: (British) Come again? Whats-whats this nonsense? (Giggles.) (American.) All right, Im-Im not English. Im from Long Island. I was really nervous and the accent just uh, just came out. Im sorry. So, if we could just get back to the lecture. Umm, were there any questions? (Everyone raises their hands) About paleontology. (They all put their hands down.) All right, look I was just trying to make a good first impression. Obviously, I screwed up. But what you guys think of me is really important because Im-Im hoping to get a permanent job here. So if you just give me another chance to make a good impression
Rachel: Ross!! Are you crazy?! I am still your wife!! What, were you just never gonna tell me?!! What the hell is wrong with you?!!!! Ugh, I could just kill you!!!!
Phoebe: Have you really done this before?
Joey: Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! You just take a big, big swing. Now, dont hold back. (He dons his protective helmet (Why, I have no clue.) and Phoebe picks up a wooden baseball bat and starts to swing as Chandler and Monica enter.)
Chandler: What are you doing?
Rachel: Well, can't you just go to Vermont the next day?
Rachel: Oh my God!! You guys have such problems!! I feel so terrible for you!
Mrs. Burkart: Oh, good. Thank you.
Chandler: If you need money, will you please-please just let me loan you some money?
Ross: Ooh, hey Ben, what if the Holiday Armadillo told you all about the Festival of Lights?
Rachel: (Gasps) Phoebe are you serious?
Monica: Hey, don't say that! You got just as good a chance as anybody else of getting that job!
Ross: That's ok. Uh, anyway, well he and I both really liked you a lot, uhm, but we didn't want anything to jeopardize our friendship, so we kinda made a pact, that neither of us could ask you out!
Ross: Yeah, um, I don't know if you noticed, but he had a lot to drink, and you know how he gets when he's drun..uh... (He has caught sight of Joey scowling at him) I can't do this, I did it, it was me, I'm sorry, I kissed your mom.
Phoebe: Hey, why are you mopping your ceiling?
Rachel: (sympathetic) Ohh. So you raised her all on your own?
Doug: (entering) Uh, I gotta apologize for Kara's coffee. Y'know, I feel sorry for it if it ever got in a fight, it's not strong enough to defend itself. (Chandler does not laugh.) Did you hear what I said Bing?
Ross: Maybe. But it wouldnt hurt to have a backup, you know? Uh, Rach-Rach, what were you thinking? (Gives her a look)
Joey: You wanna see her again, right?
Ross: (interrupting her) Okay. Okay. If uh, if youre gonna do this, then Im gonna do that. (Points to the bathroom.) So (Starts for the bathroom.)
The Stripper: You are really good at that. So uh, I had fun tonight, you throw one hell of a party.
Phoebe Sr: Oh gosh, Lily, yes. Of course I remember Lily. I... Then you must be?
PHOEBE: So um, so what's up, you came to see me yesterday.
Chandler: (laughs) Well, don�t believe everything you hear, Ken. (both turning away to files) But yeah, that�s true. Alright, let�s get started, by take a look at last quarter�s figures. (The female next to Chandler starts smoking, towards her:) Ah, Claudia, aren�t you supposed to blow smoke up the bosses� ass?
Ross: Yes I-I am. In fact umm hey, why dont we try it my special way? You can dance on my feet.
Leslie: Aw, youre right, youre right. Im sorry.
Teacher: May I help you?
Monica: Yes you did! You did like a little hop.
Ross: You get the dollhouse.
Phoebe: What a mean thing to say! I would never tell you its not your birthday!
Ross: Oh, thanks, thanks. So Monica tells me that uh, you dont want to play anymore because me and y'know my talent. Is that true?
Monica: Can you go any faster with that?
RACHEL: Ok mom, you know what, fine, I'll make an appointment ok, but you know what, right now, I gotta go, I gotta go do a thing.
Chandler: That's not what I had in mind! See, people like Ross don't generally wear these types of pants. You see, they're very tight. (Motions to Ross's buttock.) Maybe there's something in that area.
Ross: You got the clothes clean. Now that's the important part.
Joey: (sitting in a chair) Hey guys, so I just called the Powerball hotline, can you believe it? Nobody won.
PHOEBE: Oh yeah. You know, I don't know if I was happier when um George Bailey destroyed the family business or um, Donna Reid cried, or when the mean pharmacist made his ear bleed.
Kathy: Thank you!
Monica: I don't know! Why don't you just explain? What do they want? Find out what they want!
Ross: Ah. Joey youre-youre having lunch with my mom?
CHANDLER: I just think it's weird, you know? Heckles and me, Heckles, and me, me and Heckles...Would you knock it off?
Rachel: Well, why don't you talk to me about it, maybe I can help.
Ross: Okay, well here we are. Now were in a tough spot again, Rach. What do you want to do? How do you want to handle it? Huh? Do you wanna fight for us? Or, do you wanna bail? (sits down next to her) Look, I, (on the verge of tears) I did a terrible, stupid, stupid thing. Okay? And Im sorry, I wish I could take it back, but I cant. (We see Monica and Phoebe are almost in tears.) I just cant see us throwing away something we know is so damn good. Rachel, I love you so much.
Joey: Well, theres really only one thing you can do.
Rachel: (laughs) I knew that! I knew that! I was just messin with you too!
Ross: No! No! Im not! Its-its-its perfect! I mean its better than you just-just moving here, cause its us together forever, and thats-thats what I want.
Chandler: I don't get it, I mean, you just got him. How can he be an adult already?
Phoebe: (looks at Monica) Hey, yknow what might cheer you up?
Casey: Here you go.
ROSS: No no, you're uh, you're my lobster. See um, lobsters, uhh, in the tank when, when they're old, uhh, they get with, uhh, they walk around holding the claws. In the tank, ya know, with, with the holding and. . . Uhh, Phoebs you wanna help me out with the, the whole lobster thing?
Man: Yeah. Me. (The elevator door opens.) Oh hey, thats me. (Rolls onto the elevator.) Hey uh, I take it youre just visiting someone.
Chandler: Yeah, not bad right? You know what, Monicas gonna be working late, so I'm gonna make this place spotless. You know what else I'm gonna do, know what else I'm gonna do? I'm gonna go downstairs, I'm gonna get her some flowers. Now who wouldn't wanna live with me?
Ross: (to Monica): Could you take it to Carol's every now and then, and show it to Ben, just so he doesn't forget me?
Chandler: Hey, shut up!! Youre not my real Mom!!
STRANGER: Hey, how, how did you do that?
Monica: No! Steady as a rock! Now, are you with me.
Monica: Thats right! You lose sucker!! (Pause) Please still marry me.
Ross: Well, you shouldve seen the guy that she used to go out with. I mean, hes like Joe Rugby.
Monica: You guys are dead, I am so good at lighting rounds.
Rachel: Nooo! Its not okay! I cant believe you would want to after what he did to me!
Joey: You know what you shouldve done, you should have told yourself that little story.
Chandler: What do you mean, like, buy it together?
Ross: I can't believe you put that on my alumni page!
Chandler: You mean like, music?
Chandler: Really?! You do that?
Chandler: SoYou got in voluntarily?!
Monica: (grabs the guitar away from her) No, Phoebe, Ill tell you what, if you get ready now Ill let you play it at the wedding.
Ross: Marcel! What've you done to him?
Monica: I'm sorry it's just, Phoebe just always thought you were, you were charming in a, in a sexless kind of way.
Monica: Hey, waitwait, aren't you the guy that plays the butt in the new Al Pacino movie?
Ross: You do appear right on the cusp of something. Come on man, I'm sure he'll lose interest in a week or two, but for now can you please just do this for me?
JOEY: Yeah, you missed, 'Takes money to make money,' and uh, 'Don't make me come down there and kick your wall street butt.'
Joey: Things that go "tssst" when you put them out.
Rachel: What about you honey, who would be on your list?
Phoebe: I’m sorry, I can’t believe I set you up with such a MONSTER!
Ross: Yeah. You see my-my sister makes these amazing turkey sandwiches. Her secret is, she puts a, an extra slice of gravy soaked bread in the middle; I call it the Moist Maker. Anyway, I-I put my sandwich in the fridge over here
Ross: Come on. These people'll scooch down. You guys'll scooch, won't you? Let's try scooching! Come on. Come on. Uh, Kristen Riggs, this is Carol Willick. Carol, Kristin. Uh, Carol teaches sixth grade. And, Kristin, Kristin...(struggling)...does something that, funnily enough, wasn't even her major!
RACHEL: Actually, what I think you said was, "don't touch that, and get the hell out of my kitchen."
MONICA: Honey, you made the bed again. I told you, you don't have to do that. This isn't camp.
Phoebe: Yeah! So--ooh, I gotta ask you though. How did you know where to find me?
Phoebe: Hey! You were really great! You were really, really great!
Monica: Oh my god, what were you thinking?
Rachel: WhHey, I just gave you peeing on a stick.
Dr. Long: Well youre only two centimeters dilated and we need to get to ten. Itll be a while.
Phoebe: So, did you pick one yet?
Rachel: No! Phoebes! Don't you remember why you dumped the guy?
Monica: Are you serious?
Phoebe: Oh! You know my friend Abby who shaves her head? She said that if you want to break the bad boyfriend cycle, you can do like a cleansing ritual.
Monica: Then why are you laughing?
Rachel: Because you do.
Joey: You do?
Rachel: Uh-huh! Nice try, but you dont get that chair anymore! All right? That is my chair now! You can sit on my lap! (Joey starts to get up.) No I take that back!
Chandler: Look, this isnt funny! You get back here right now!
Ross: Uh Phoebe, can I see you for a second?
Chandler: How many times have I told you guys, you never watch the cooking channel!
Joey: It's easy, you just walk in on them having sex.
Chandler: All right look, if youre not gonna stay for me, then at least stay for them! Okay, they have had a very difficult year! What with the robbery and all!
Rachel: So Pheebs, what do you want for your birthday?
Phoebe: Oh, I should go, too. Oh, now... tomorrow do you guys wanna share a cab to the airport or should Mike and I just meet you there.
Chandler: So explain something to me here, uh, what kind of a relationship do you imagine us having if you already have a husband and a boyfriend?
JOEY: Whichever one you want, man. Whichever one you want. [Chandler starts to sit in one of the chairs] Not that one.
Ross: My God. Rachel! (He walks towards her, grasps her hands and kisses her on the cheek.) Your here. I cant believe it. (She giggles.) What happen? Why are you here?
Dr. Schiff: So, are you experiencing any discomfort?
Monica: (laughing harder) You know the words! You are so into this!
Chandler: There you go.