words in movies
Joey: What are you doing?
Joey: (laughs) Why would you want to do that?
Joey: The big deal is that it is the exact equal distance from the bathroom to the kitchen and its at the perfect angle so you dont get any glare coming of off Stevie.
Rachel: No! (Joey sets his beer and bag of chips down and heads into his room.) Oh what does he know! Come on Rosita, us chichas got to stick together! (She tries pulling on the back of the chair, until the hinge breaks and the back falls off.) You bitch!
Ross: Hey, yknow whats weird? After you guys get married, when you introduce me to people youre gonna have to say, "This is my brother-in-law Ross." Not, "My friend Ross," "brother-in-law Ross." Thats weird isnt it?
Ross: (disappointed) Sure, do whatever you want.
Ross: (on phone) Uh, hello dad! Monica and I just saw the house in the paper! (Listens) Yes were surprised! (Listens) Who did you leave a message with?
Joey: I told you not to move it! Rach, how would you feel if say, I wanted to move you mom, and you said dont, and I did it anyway and her head fell off?
Rachel: Okay, come onJoey, Ill buy you a new one! All right? Well go down to the store right now and well-well get you a new chair.
Rachel: But dont you think Rosita wouldve wanted you to move on? I mean yknow, she did always put your comfort first.
Rachel: (grabbing her coat) Okay? You ready?
Monica: Well, after 15 years of mom and dad keeping it as a shrine to you, its time the velvet ropes came down.
Ross: Come on, you know they love you.
Monica: As much as they love you?
Ross: Hey, yknow if you want to pick up some extra cash? Some friends of mine made good money doing telemarketing.
Monica: Oh thats a great idea. Youre really good on the phone.
Phoebe: Oh yeah, like you never called!
Supervisor: So basically this is very easy. You read from the script and try to sell as much toner as you possibly can.
Phoebe: Umm, okay I would like to talk to you about your toner needs.
Phoebe: Oh okay, well Im sorry to bother you. Bye-bye. (Hangs up the phone.) Yeah youre right, this is easy.
Phoebe: Oh well, all right um, no offense, but you were kind of rude.
Supervisor: Theyre always going to tell you they dont need toner, but thats okay because whatever they say, you can find the answer to it here in this script.
Supervisor: So, I think youre ready to sell toner, do you have any last questions?
Mr. Geller: Hi. God, it seems like just yesterday you guys used to come out to watch me work.
Ross: Dad, we-we cant believe youre selling the house.
Ross: Yeah, not as much as you used to love to play uncooked batter eater.
Mr. Geller: So, I think youre boxes are over here. (They walk over to them.)
Ross: How are you ever going to sell this place?
Mr. Geller: You dont secretly smoke do you?
Phoebe: (on phone) Hi, this Phoebe from Empire Office Supplies, can I speak to your supply manager please? (Listens) Earl, thanks. (Listens) Hi Earl, this is Phoebe from Empire Office Supplies Id like to talk to you about your toner needs. (Shes reading from the script.)
Phoebe: Im hearing what youre saying, but at our prices everyone needs toner.
Earl: You wanna know why. You wanna know why?
Phoebe: (doesnt have any luck) Umm, is-is that because youre out of toner?
Phoebe: No-no wait-wait! I cant just let you hang up! Just please talk to me.
Phoebe: Yeah! Now, why do you want to kill yourself?
Phoebe: No look, I-Im sure that people know you exist!
Earl: Oh yeah? I work in a cubicle surrounded by people. Ive been talking to you for five minutes now about killing myself and no ones even looked up from their desk. Hang-hang on. (To the people standing around his cubicle.) Hey everybody! Uh, Im gonna kill myself! (Theres no response; no one even looks up.) Ill get back to ya. (To Phoebe) I got nothing. Wait. (He sets the phone down.) Uh, hey Marge! (Mimes putting a gun to his head, pulling the trigger, and splattering his brain on the wall behind him. Then points to himself. Marge watches this, then goes back to work.) (To Phoebe) Ehh, nothing. Nothing.
Rachel: You will like it!
Rachel: You dont even know!
Rachel: Well look, if you dont like this (The audiences laughter at Chandlers progress cuts out the rest of Rachels line.)
Joey: I dont know why you say that so soon.
Rachel: Come on Joey, I just bought you a new chair! The most expensive one in the store! Hey, yknow what I was thinking? We could name her Francette.
Joey: Well, I guess youre right. Maybe, maybe Ill take her down to the incinerator. Its gonna be so said, and kinda cool. (He goes to remove the back, but it doesnt come off. So he sits down in it, puts his feet up, stands up, and looks back at it.) Shes heeled!
Joey: Oh there is! If you want something enough and your heart is pure, wondrous things can happen!
Joey: (interrupting her) Can you tell me how this happened?
Ross: Dad that wont matter to her. Look, all my stuff is safe and dry and all her is-is, is growing new stuff! See, this is exactly the kind of thing that makes her think you guys love me more than you love her.
Ross: Well, can you blame her?
Mr. Geller: Well I dont know, I-I suppose we may have favored you unconsciously, you were a medical marvel! The doctor said your mother could
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is sitting the now heeled Rosita as Rachel is sitting in the newly arrived Francette. Francette is one of those new chairs from La-Z-Boy that has and does everything except cook and go to the bathroom for you. Its got a small refrigerator under one armrest it has phone jacks for the Internet and regular phone, and so much more.]
Rachel: Yeah! You can hook it up to your TV and you get radio!
Phoebe: Earl, youre not hearing me! All Im saying is that youre not alone all right? Everybody hates the people they work with! (One of her coworkers overhears that, and she mimes that she didnt mean him.)
Phoebe: Wait, what was that? That sounded like someone being nice to you.
Phoebe: No! Im not finished yet! Dont! Dont you dare hang up on me!!!
Mr. Geller: (overacting) Thats a good one! Do you hear that Ross? Three days!
Ross: Yeah. Yeah, oh you loved that thing. You always had it with you. You never went anywhere without-without that coloring book.
Mr. Geller: Oh, yeah you loved that glove! You took it every place you went. You never went any place without that glove.
Monica: So why-why wasnt Rosss stuff ruined? (Pause) And if you say the words medical marvel Im going to Easy Bake your head!
Monica: So wait, Rosss stuff is fine, but I have no memories because you wanted to keep the bottom two inches of your car away from water!!!
Rachel: How would you like to sit in a chair that fully reclines, has a rolling massage, and speakers in the head rest?
Rachel: Well what if I told you, you can do it in my apartment?
Chandler: (excitedly) Are you telling me that you bought the chair that is making all other lounge systems obsolete? The chair that Sit magazine called the Chair of the Year?
Chandler: Thats awesome! Thats great! What made you do it?!
Chandler: Whoa-whoa-whoa! You broke Joeys chair?
Chandler: Well, what did you think, that-that elves came in and fixed it?
Chandler: Joey you broke my chair!!
Rachel: Uh-huh! Nice try, but you dont get that chair anymore! All right? That is my chair now! You can sit on my lap! (Joey starts to get up.) No I take that back!
Joey: How do you figure?
Chandler: Because you (Points to Joey) broke a chair and you (Points to Rachel) broke a chair! The only one around here that hasnt broke a chair, is me!
Chandler: What are you guys? Like a gang or something?!
Phoebe: (to Marge) Excuse me! Can you tell me where I can find Earl? Hes the supply manager around here.
Phoebe: No-no I cant! I cant let you do it!
Phoebe: Because it was fate that made me call you today!
Phoebe: No! Think about it okay? This isnt even my regular job! Okay? And my first day on the job, youre my first call! And-and somebody else mightve hung up on you, but I wouldnt do that because I know about this stuff. My mom killed herself.
Phoebe: Im not gonna give you tips! Look dont you see that this-this this all came together so that I could stop you from doing this.
Phoebe: Sure! (Thinks.) Umm, where are you from?
Phoebe: But ifno look, okay. These jerks might not care about you, but the universe does! And that says a lot!
Earl: (To All) Did you hear that?! I dont need you guys to care about me! Because the universe cares! The whole universe! (Laughs as everyone ignores him.) (To Phoebe) I really wished theyd care just a little bit though.
Phoebe: Yknow, I dont-I dont think its you. This is a freaky place. (To All) Hey! Guys! (Everyone looks up.) (To Earl) Oh no, its you.
Monica: Oh, this terrible! Everything is destroyed! Look at this. (She picks up some kind of furry thing.) It obviously meant enough for me to save it, and I dont even know what it is! Ohh, its still soft. (She rubs it against her cheek.) What do you think this is?
Mr. Geller: (entering) How are you honey?
Monica: How do you think I am?! Youve wrecked all my childhood memories. You love Ross more than me. And I just rubbed a dead mouse on my face!
Mr. Geller: Sweetheart, we love you just as much as Ross! Now, Im sorry about everything that happened and Id probably never be able to make it up to you, but heres a start. (He hands her a small box.)
Monica: Wait, youre giving me your Porsche, youre kidding me right?!
Monica: Do you guys know what happened to Chandlers barca lounger?
Monica: Are you kidding?! I get a Porsche and the barca loungers gone?! This is the best day ever! (Runs out.)
Gavin: Do you have fever? Let me see. Hum...
Ross: Yep! I'd like to thank you guys for coming down here to complain about the rain and ruin my career!
Chandler: All right, so who do you got it narrowed down to?
Monica: Hey, isnt weird to think about how next year at this time theyll be a little baby at the table? (Chandler turns around in horror.) (Seeing him) Rachels! But good to know where youre at!
Chandler: All right. Yes. Okay. I get your point. But if its not your bra will you just let the woman clean the apartment?!
Emily: I'll feel better when I'm there, and I can know where you are all the time.
Rachel: (hesitant) Ye-ah. Yeah! You know, the money's great. It's certainly the easier choice...
Ross: Ah Ah Get out of here! (The couple retreats. Ross starts looking through the previously mentioned book as a beautiful woman walks into the section.) Uh, meeting someone? Or-or are you just here to brush up on Marions views on evolution?
Ray: Uh Joey, didnt your agents give you the revised rules? Weve eliminated all of that. No wheel, no cards.
Phoebe: Well, I told you I had to spend all the day clearing out stuff, so Mike could move in.
Ross: We're shushing... because... we're trying to hear something. Listen. (everyone is silent) Don't you hear that?
Kim: Forget it Rachel! We're both so proud of how well you're doing. I'm not gonna let you blow it. In fact, if I catch you with a cigarette, you're fired. So go on, get out of here! Go on, I don't want you breathing this stuff! Go on!
Joey: Oh come on! Just pick one! Between Monica, Phoebe, Chandler, and Ross if you had to, if you had to, who would you punch?
Phoebe: Yeah, I should go to, `cause I'm playing in one hour. Hey, (clears her voice and in her normal voice) you guys should come hear me, ooh hear me. Ooh, (tries to sing) My sticky shoes--eww! Eww! I lost my sexy phlegm!
Rachel: Joey? Could you get that? (There is no answer and she goes and opens the door to Joey.) What are you doing here? I thought you were in your room?
Chandler: If you listen very carefully, I think its Celebration by Cool and the Gang.
Susan: That would be great! Also, uh, I was hoping to catch a show so if you can make any suggestions
Erica: I'm really happy for you guys.
Chandler: Hey, you know what, here's a thought. Why don't you stay home from work today and just hang out with me.
Monica: Yes! Absolutely. Okay? Look, youll know its mine because on the right cup, the lacey part, theres a very noticeable rip.
Elizabeth: Are you okay? Whats wrong?
Monica: So are you thinking of starting up something with this guy?
Wendy: Okay, let me ask you something: if what you and your wife have is so great, then why are you spending Christmas with me?
Rachel: But you have it right there in that file? You could tell us whether its a boy or a girl? Dayton or Sandrine? Phoebe or Phoebo?
Ross: (answering the phone.) Hello. (Listens) Hi sweetie. (Listens.) Good. Look umm, yes I've been thinking about that thing that you wanted me to do and, I can do it. (Rachel gives him a thumbs up.) So will you come to New York? (Rachel wants to know what she said, and he gives her a thumbs up and she goes over and hugs him. All the time not knowing what's going on.)
Phoebe: Joey, you pick who ever you want. Okay? You just listen to your heart. What does it tell you? (Mimicking a heartbeat and tapping her chest.) Phoebe, Phoebe.
Rachel: Well y'know, we have 7 people and like 10 pizzas, what do you think?
Chandler: I'd like to propose a toast. Little toast here, ding ding. I know this isn't the kind of Thanksgiving that all of you all planned, but for me, this has been really great, you know, I think because it didn't involve divorce or projectile vomiting. Anyway, I was just thinking, I mean, if you'd gone to Vail, and if you guys'd been with your family, if you didn't have syphilis and stuff, we wouldn't be all together, you know? So I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm very thankful that all of your Thanksgivings sucked.
JOEY: Yeah, someplace nice. (to Phoebe and Rachel) How much do you think I can get for my kidney? (at Central Perk)
Joey: Are you kidding me?! I love Archie! And the whole gang!
MONICA: You're the most wonderful man. And if you hadn't of said 'if I have to' like seventeen times, then I'd be saying 'okay, let's do it.'
Chandler: Oh, yeah, easy for you to say, you don't have to walk around sporting some reject from the Mr. T collection. [Joey walks in behind Chandler]
Chandler: Well, it's not like I went to Spain. I went to the bathroom, you knew I was coming back.
Chandler: (trying to stop Ross leaving) C'mon, Ross! You, me, Joey, ice, guys' night out, c'mon, whaddya say, big guy, (Pretending to punch him in the stomach.) Huh? Huh? Huh?
Rachel: Because you took three hundred bottles of shampoo?
Joey: Its better! You cant go to a museum in your underwear!
Chandler: Can we read it? Can you print out another copy?
Monica: You touch peoples eyeballs every day and this feels weird.
Monica: We think if you saw it, you'd understand. I mean you guys were there. (Points to Rachel and Phoebe) It is beautiful, isn't it?
Janice: No, you were right, you were right. I mean, I-I-Ive got to give my marriage another chance.
Ross: Hey Mon, that was really nice of you to loan Rachel your car so she could go and get the cake.
Chandler: Let me get this straight. I called yesterday trying to cancel my reservation and I was told it was not refundable, then we drove six hours all the way up here and now you tell me that we don't have a reservation?
Pete: I bought a restaurant and I would like you to be the head chef.
Monica: Wh-wh-what are you doing here? (She tries to pull her shirt down to cover the fact that she's wearing men's boxers.]
Phoebe: (overemphasizing) Mmmmmm! Everything smells so delicious! You know, I can't remember a time I smelt such a delicious combination of (Monica signals her to stop) of, OK, smells.
Rachel: G.I. Joe? Do you really think he's gonna fall for that?
Joey: Hey-hey-hey, hey thats your wife youre talking about!
Chandler: Shhhh! Shhhhh! Shhhhh! Shhhhh! (Walks backwards towards the door) I cant, I cant hear you. (He runs out)
Monica: And say what? "You owe me a goodbye", I mean, he's got more pride than that.
Mrs. Green: Look at that face! Just like when you were in high school! If I didnt know better Id say you were a cheerleader in trouble. Come on, lets get some tea.
Rachel: No I wasnt! You were supposed to tell her to come and I was supposed to bring the cake!
Ross: All right, you know that one was coming, but that doesnt mean you have unagi. (Does the finger thing.)
Joey: Oh, ehm...I'm...I'm rehearsing my lines.They gave me a big romantic story on Days Of Our Lives. It's the first time my character's got one. I'm so nervous, you know, I really want it to be good!
The Interviewer: Oh, I know what I wanted to ask you. You were on the show years ago and then they killed you off. What happened there?
Chandler: You are gonna be a huge star! Im gonna hug ya!
Chandler: Oh Im sorry! Do you need a break?
Rachel: Hey! Hey, you guys, I finished the crossword all by myself! Hug me!
Phoebe: (in a coy tone) Oh, you caught me. I am so busted.
Rachel: I dont know, you thought See you Saturday was funny. Look honey, Mark is in fashion okay, I like having a friend that I can share this stuff with. You guys would never want to go to a lecture with me.
PHOEBE: There isn't time. You must leave everything. They'll take care of you next door.
RACHEL: Agh, what a jerk. I kept talking about you and he kept asking me out. I mean, naturally, you know, I said no.
Joey: Look, you and I have been given a gift. Okay? We have to do something with it. Like-like, hand modeling! Huh? Or-or magic! And you know NASA's gonna wanna talk to us!
Monica: Yeah but I was just screwing with you to try to get your voice all high and weird like mine is now!
MONICA: Alright, before I tell you, uh, why don't you tell me how many women you've been with.
Frank: I can't believe there's somebody coming out of you right now. There's somebody coming out of you! Is it? Is it? It's my son.
Rachel: O-kay!! See what you did, Im gonna be doing it by myself now. Okay?
Chandler: And, ah, you know, your fooling around with her. And you get all these like, mental images in your brain, you know, like Elle MacPherson, or that girl at the Xerox place....
Chandler: Now-now, why would you say that Joseph?
Phoebe: Hornswoggle? (To Chandler) Ooh, this must be killing you.
Chandler: You serious? (follows)
Man: Well umm, if you have sometime yknow and maybe you might want to visit someone else
CHANDLER: Bit country? C'mon in here you roomie.
Rachel: I am still talking!! And then you chase away the one guy that I actually liked! I mean, no offense to you guys. Really! I mean (To Patrick) congratulations on all the cash, (He nods) and-and yknow(Feels Eldads hair)Wow! You do have very soft hair! But I would much rather go to the ball all by myself than go through anymore of this! Good-bye! (Grabs her stuff, starts to leave, then turns back suddenly, and to Eldad) Now do you use some sort of special conditioner on that hair?!
Chandler: Let me just say something... Because once we get into this, I'm gonna get all uncomfortable and probably make some stupid joke... I just want to say that I... I love you... And, I'm gonna miss you. And I'm so sad that you're leaving.
Joey: Maybe she wants you to learn something. Huh? Now is there anything youre really bad at yknow, sexually?
Joey: Yeah, in my third drawer on my dresser. You dont want to lose that.
Ross: (running up) Hey! Sorry I kept you waiting so long.
Phoebe: I picked her! Oh thank God you want her! Ooh!
Chandler: Can I just say how much I appreciate you coming with me. When we get to Tulsa I'm taking you for a great dinner at 'Slim Pickings'. 'So Cheesy'? 'Whole Hog'? It's going to be tough to keep Kosher in Tulsa.
Ross: Wow! This picture of you sure is steamy.
Joey: Of course! Only an idiot would wear this stuff if you didnt have the car! Right?
Rachel: Oh yeah, scared the hell out of me. I thought wed lost you forever. Pheebs, you lie down?
Monica: Well, if you really think about it, I mean four days is not that long. I mean, I see you Monday before you go to work, and I see you Thursday when you get back, and I always work late on Tuesdays, so really if you think about it, it's really just one day. And well, if we can't make it one day, we've got real problems my friend.
The Saleswoman: You wanna return this couch? (Ross nods yes.) It's cut in half!
Ross: Hey you guys, I need some fashion advice.
Ross: Oh but I-I-I haven't paid you yet!
Rachel: No, you're not! Last week you thought Ross was trying to kill you!
Monica: What-what was it you were gonna tell us?
Monica: Phoebe! You kinda caught me at a bad time.
Monica: Whoa-whoa-whoa, Phoebe you gotta take her! Yknow I-I-I said some really bad stuff about her, but yknow Rachel has some good qualities that make her a good roommate.
Mike: No but... You don't want to get married either right?
Joey: Now, wait a second! You make food and robots?
Ross: Im sorry I had to take such drastic measures to make my point, but Ilook, I just want you guys to be safe. (Monica comes out to throw out the garbage and Ross screams ) DANGER!!!!! (She completely ignores him and keeps walking.) Ahhh, huh? Unagi.
Joey: We want you to be happy. And I may only have a couple beers in me, but... I love you, man. (Joey gives Ross a hug)
The Cooking Teacher: I think you should give him your star.
RACHEL: Ok, so Phoebe, now are you gonna call your dad and let him know that his dog is ok?
Monica: Thank you. (To Chandler.) I think I just had a tiny orgasm.
Joey: I'll kick that door in if you give me a little sugar.
Monica: Are you gonna be ok, officer, uhm,...
Roger: Listen guys, it was great seeing you again. Mon, um, easy on those cookies, okay? Remember, they're just food, they're not love.