words in movies
MONICA: So, I'll get candles and my mom's lace tablecloth, and since it's Rachel's birthday, I mean, we want it to be special, I thought I'd poach a salmon.
MONICA: You wanna be in charge of the food committee?
MONICA: Alright. If you guys don't want it to be special, fine. You can throw any kind of party you want.
RACHEL: Ya know, I mean this is supposed to be a joyous occasion. My sister's graduating from college, nobody thought she would. It's a true testament to what a girl from long island would do for a Celica.
PHOEBE: [cutting Mrs. Greene off] Ha-ha, that's great, ha-ha. I can't wait to hear the rest of it, ya know, but I really have to go to the bathroom so... Hey, come with me. Yeah, yeah, it'll be like we're gal pals, ya know, like at a restraunt. Oh, it'll be fun, c'mon. [they go in the bathroom]
CHANDLER: Look, are you gonna be ok?
RACHEL: Well, I have to be, I don't really have a choice, I mean, you know, I could look at the bright side, I get two birthday parties and two birthday cakes.
RACHEL: Uhh, let's just stay clear of 'I'm the guy that's doing you daughter' and you should be ok.
MONICA: Listen you guys, I don't mean to be a pain about this but, um, I've noticed that some of you are just placing them on. You wanna push the caps until you hear them click. [she demonstrates, Gunther starts to walk to the door] Gunther, where're you going?
ROSS: Scotch. Alright, I'll be back in 10 seconds with your scotch on the rocks in a glass.
PHOEBE: Ok, ok, she's taking the trash out so I can get you out of here but it has to be now, she'll be back any minute.
MONICA: You, and you, you're supposed to be at my party. And Gunther! What are you doing here?
CHANDLER: [running out of his apartment after a girl] Ok, ok, you can be shirts and I'll be skins. I'll be skins. [sits down beside Rachel] Hey, how you holdin' up there, tiger? Oh, sorry, when my parents were getting divorced I got a lot of tigers. Got a lot of champs, chiefs, sports, I even got a governor.
RACHEL: This is it, isn't it? I mean, this is what my life is gonna be like. My mom there, my dad there. Thanksgiving, Christmas. She gets the house, he's in some condo my sister's gonna decorate with wicker. Oh, Chandler how did you get through this?
RACHEL: It's just this thing. Every year we would go out on my dad's boat and watch the fireworks. Mom always hated it because the ocean air made her hair all big. My sister Jill would be throwing up over the side and my dad would be upset becasue nobody was helping and then when we did help he would scream at us for doing it wrong. But then when the fireworks started, everybody just shut up, you know, and it'd get really cold, and we would all just sort of smush under this one blanket. It never occured to anybody to bring another one. And now it's just...
MRS. GREENE: Alright, Monica dear, I'm gonna hit the road. Now I've left my 10 verbs on the table. And you be sure and send me that finished poem.
PHOEBE: Oh no, you're not supposed to be here. This is the staging area, you should, it's all wrong, you should leave, ya know, get out. [opens the door, the guys are right there] Or perhaps you'd like a creme d'menthe.
MR. GREENE: I have to be heading to my chateau, thank you.
Joey: Uh so, will-will I be reading the same scene again?
Ross: Well Im, Im a little slow. (To himself) Just as our children would be.
Ross: (in his head) Say something clever! (Pause.) Okay, doesnt have to be clever, it just has to be words. Say some words. (Pause) Any words will do. (Pause) Oh my God! This is the longest that anyone has not talked ever! (Pause) There is nothing you can say to make this worse!! So just say something!! (Pause.) (To her) I-I, I uh havent had sex in a very long time. (She leaves.) (In his head) Yeah, you really shouldnt have said anything.
Monica: I'm sorry honey, but we're gonna take you shopping. It's gonna be fine.
Rachel: Oh, stop that! Dont kid about that! (Gasps) Will all the stars be there?
Woman: Thatd be great, thanks. (Gunther goes and gets them.)
Joey: No I mean it! I cant believe they would do this to you! And to your fans! I mean they are going to be devastated! Heart broken! They love you so much!
Rachel: Shes actually very sweet and we used to be very close.
Cecilia: That was good, that was really good. But I-I think your hands maybe a little off, they should be maybe right like (She grabs the back of his neck and kisses him passionately causing them to fall onto the couch.)
Joey: Hey, so where are my parents gonna be?
Joey: What theyre not invited?! Oh no, thats terrible! Theyre gonna be crushed!
Monica: Oh! (Gets up) Lets see, well if this is the wedding hall then umm (Walks away) youre parents will be at home in Queens.
Chandler: I was dangerously dehydrated during the first six months of our relationship. (Monica laughs.) Look, for me the rush is knowing that we are gonna be together for the rest of our lives.
(He starts the car and surprisingly in fires right up and comes to a nice idle. (Both can be rarities with British sports cars with their lovely Lucas ignition systems, which tend not to work especially in the rain.) Anyway, this being New York he is parallel parked on a street with the car in front of him only inches ahead of his bumper, likewise with the car behind him. Hes completely boxed in and cant move more than two inches. He tries to get out several times by bumping the bumpers of both cars to no avail.)
[That's all folks, no teaser; just the big cliffhanger for season 6. Yes, there will be a season 6, and it'll start again in September. Have a good summer everyone!]
Rachel: Can I please be there when you tell her? (Joey nods yes.)
Ross: Yeah! Oh yeah, youll be fine! It-itll be uh, just like bungy jumping. Yknow? But instead of bouncing back up you-you wont.
Phoebe: Okay, then I must be disoriented.
Joey: Come on! Look just-just telllet her know that you really want them to be there. Lets not forget, this is a woman that has sent you many lasagnas over the years.
Ross: Yes. I find it to be something of a conversation piece.
Joey: No! No, I-I just wanna thank you guys for what you did for my parents, that was really sweet. Theyre so happy they get to be a part of your special day.
Joey: Ah. Yeah. Well look, the thing is its the same day as my nieces christening and I really want my parents to be there in time to see me. Cause my parts just in the beginning Im not even in the rest of the showWedding!
Chandler: (writing) Monica, there are no words (To Joey and Ross) There are no words! This should not be this hard!
Monica: Why won't I be married when I'm 40?
Monica: Ok, hypothetically, why won't I be married when I'm 40?
Chandler: No! Ok, this is not good. You are a guy. Ok? This is a guys place. If you let this go, youre going to be sitting around with your fingers soaking in stuff.
Monica: Then all your stuff would be here.
Monica: Then youd be going back and forth all the time, I mean it doesnt make any sense.
Monica: You wanted it to be a surprise.
Monica: (handing him a pad of paper and a pen) Lets just do it right now. Okay? It wont be hard. Just say whats in your heart. (She goes back, sits down, and starts feverishly writing.)
Monica: Chandler In all my life I never thought I would be so lucky. (Starting to cry.) As to fall in love with my best my best Theres a reason why girls dont do this!
Ross: I cant believe in four weeks theyre gonna be married!
Monica: (on phone) I can't wait to be with you! I'll just tell Rachel I'm gonna be doing laundry for a couple of hours.
Rachel: I have so got it. Theres gonna be rumours about this, theres no way to stop it. Sophie knows, Monica and Phoebe know.
Phoebe: You should be. I'm very bendy. (Pause) I'm gonna kiss you now.
Ross: Itll be okay Joe.
Rachel: You really think it would be that different?
Ross: That little naked guy would be me.
Ross: Yes, yes, fine, that is my penis. Can we be grown-ups now?
Ross: (looking) Nono, that would be me again.
Ross: Look Rach if-if you want to go for a ride in the Porsche Ill be glad to take you for a quick spin around the block.
Monica: Chandler! Hes your father; he should be at the wedding.
Phoebe: Yeah! Sure! Ooh, I left my purse up at Monicas. Ill be right back. (She goes to get it.)
Chandler: Are you serious?! I mean like eloping?! No more stupid wedding stuff?! No more these flowers or these flowers or these flowersThink of the money well save!! (Monica just looks at him.) Were not eloping. I love the flowers. Can our wedding be bigger please?
Melissa: Okay. (To Phoebe) Well, it was great meeting you. And uh Rachel, I-I dont think Ill be calling you (hails a cab) because umm, yknow youve gotten weird. (The cab pulls up.) Take care you guys.
Chandler: No! No! I dont want him to know were yet! Im not sure Im ready for that. And besides hes not gonna be too happy to see me either.
Monica: That cant be your father.
Monica: Relax! Youll be fine. (Chandler exhales and turns off the table light.) Oh much better. Youre invisible now.
Ross: Can you believe this? Were gonna be on the platform for the Millennium moment!
Joey: Yeah! And-and things arent as smashed down as I thought they were gonna be.
Chandler: Wait! Wait! Wed really love it if you could be there.
Monica: Do you realize this is probably the last time well all be here in the coffee house as six single people?
Chandler: Yep! From now on its gonna be the four of you guys and me and the misses. The little woman. The wife. The old ball and chain.
Ross: Well this uh, this may be a little awkward.
Monica: I'd rather hang out with a sniveling work weasel guy when I can be hanging out with my boyfriend who I actually respect.
Monica: Im making a list of all the things that are most likely to go wrong at the wedding. Now, that way I can be prepared.
Joey: Oh no, Ill be done by then.
Rachel: Youre gonna be late! Go! Go! (He runs out.)
Rachel: OH MY GOD!!! (She holds her hands up in triumph and the gang all look at her.) Sorry, I was just imagining what itd be like to catch the money bouquet.
Monica: Hey, do you realize that at this time tomorrow well be getting married?
Chandler: Okay. Ill be right there.
Mrs. Bing: Dont you have a little too much penis to be wearing a dress like that?
Mr. Bing: Yes! Although, I think we may be seeing a little too much of some people. Arent you a little old to be wearing a dress like that?
Catherine: All the appliances are included. There is a lot of light, a new kitchen... I think you guys would be very happy here... (Joey and Chandler both realise what she's assuming and start laughing.)
Phoebe: Dont be so negative! Good God! Isnt it possible that Sorry is sitting in there (Joey and Rachels apartment) right now?!
Rachel: God! DontWe cant let her start getting ready! This is too awful! Oh God, but wait shell be in the gown and then he wont show up and then shes gonna have to take off the gown
Monica: Any woman would be lucky to have ya.
Phoebe: How could it not be? I mean pretty soon theyre gonna be having kids, and then theyre just gonna be hanging out with other couples who have kids. And then maybe theyre gonna have to leave the city to be near a Volvo dealership.
Chandler: Because if I go home, were gonna become the Bings! I cant be the Bings!
Monica: How can that be?! Oh wait! Wait! Are you, are you serious?!
Richard: That can be arranged.
Chandler: I see, but once you get your first paycheck you'll be springing a big hotel suite, right? I mean, lead in a movie, they must be paying you a lot?
Monica:: Oh well this is the only one they had at our video store, but they did have something called crocodile killers. Or does it always have to be sharks?
Joey: Yeah, and there wont be a relationship left to rebuild.
Monica: (getting up) Im gonna go put my make up on, we have to be at the hotel in an hour! (Starts for the bathroom.)
Transcribers Note: This is stuff we never saw from all of the seasons, so for all of the scene settings I will be using the current arrangements. Even though some of the out takes take place when Chandler was living with Joey and Rachel was living with Monica, when Joey and Chandler were living in Monica and Rachels, and the current arrangements.
Courtney: Thisll be five/ten takes.
Chandler: Trust me, you dont want him there either. Okay? Nobody is gonna be staring at the bride when the father of the groom is wearing a back-less dress.
Conan: But there must be, there mustare a lot of moments over the years where youre just trying to do your job, something goes wrong.
Rachel: Oh! Oh! Can I give out the candy? I really want to be with the kids right now. Yknow, ever since I got pregnant I-I have the strongest maternal instincts.
Conan: Well be right back with more Friends, less me.
Conan: Youve done over 150 episodes, but your favorite moments that 80 years from now youll be thinking about?
Cecilia: (walking up) Youre absolutely right they are writing me out of the show. They dont know exactly when its going to happen, but apparently going to be very soon and thats it.
Ross: No! (Pause) Ill be right back. (Exits.)
Chandler: Yeah, the last six weeks. I wanted this to be a moment you will never forget.
Monica: Well, are you going to be able to do this?
Monica: (on phone, faking she's sick) I-I'm not gonna be able to make it into work today, I don't feel very good. (Joey makes a high throw and Monica has to catch it way over her head.) (Not sounding sick) Yes!! (Realizes what she just did.) (Sounding sick again) Wow! Uh, for a second there I thought I was really better, but I'm not. (Hangs up and keeps throwing the ball.)
Mona: Oh good. Now therell be someone there who likes my name.
Bandleader: Thank you, thank you very much. If everyone will please take your seats, dinner will be served.
Monica: in this day and age how dumb do you have to be to get pregnant?
Monica: Maybe. I just hope she realizes how hard its gonna be.
Mona: Id be happy to. (To Ross) You are very sweet.
Phoebe: Oh. (Picks it up.) Its just so unexpected! I I uh Boy Ill tell you its just such an honor to be nominated for a Nobel Prize and yknow to win one for a massage. Especially after having just won a Tony award for best actress in
Monica: Ohh come on, I love this song! Come on, youll be fine. (She starts to walk towards the floor.)
Rachel: Thanks. (Crying) God this is so stupid! (Pause) How could I be upset over something I never had? Its negative?
CHANDLER: Hey I didn't kill your fish. Look Eddie...[puts his hand on Eddie's shoulder] Would you look at what I'm doin' here. That can't be smart. So we're just gonna take this guy right off ya and put him here in Mr. Pocket. Tangellon? [picks up the fruit an tosses it to Eddie, it hits Eddie in the chest and falls]
Monica: Oh, come on its my wedding! That can be my present.
Monica: They wont be ready for weeks.
Monica: (depressed) Thats right. Im no longer a bride. Ill never be a bride again. Now, Im just someones wife!
Rachel: Well its only different if he wants it to be. I mean, Im not gonna ask him for anything.