words in movies
Monica: (congested) Ugh, they sent me home. They said I cant work if Im sick.
Joey: Well if its free food, how come youre charging me for it?
Joey: Well, what if they came in third in a modeling contest?
Monica: Okay, Ill rest. But yknow if Im going to bed, then youre coming with me.
Chandler: That would be impossible to resist if you werent all drippy here. (Points to his nose.)
Rachel: Oh my God! I can not believe that! I mean I dont really like it when Ross goes out with anyone, but my sister isnt that like incest or something?! Oh my God, and theyre gonna have sex! Oh! Oh no what if he marries her too?! Oh this is just terrible, this is just terrible. And I cant stop it! I cantI dont own Ross! Yknow? And Jill, she should be able to do whatever it is that she wants to do! And oh my God, I cant believe Ross is marrying my little sister, this terrible. Oh my God, this is just the worst thing that could have ever happened to me.
Rachel: (on the couch) Oh hi! Yknow, I just wanted to see if there were any leads on the old job front.
Jill: Well okay, if it means that much to you, then Ill ask him out.
Ross: I have to say you are a much bigger person than I am. I mean after all weve been through, I justyknow I wish I had a brother to reciprocate. Hey, if you ever want to go out with Monica, you have my blessing.
Monica: Okay, if you really wanna have sex
PHOEBE: Yeah, I agree. Ya know, I think fancy parties are only fun if you're fancy on the inside and I'm just not sure we are.
Phoebe: Well, if you think it will help.
Monica: Yeah. And yknow, if you wanna cry, thats okay too.
JOEY: Well if he's not gonna eat it, I will.
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Phoebe are there reading. Rachel is sitting on the couch flanked by Ross and Monica. She suddenly stops reading and starts blinking her left eye as if it's bothering her. The problem is that Joey is on her left and thinks she's winking at him and winks back. Ross is watching this and isn't quite sure of what to make of it.]
Phoebe: Yeah, but theres a two-year wait. And then what if you get engaged in two years and then you got to wait another two years for this place. Thats four years. Chandlers not gonna wait that long. Hes gonna find somebody else, yknow? Someone, someone who did put their name on the list. (Rachel agrees.)
Ross: Sure! Oh, and Joeys got the mashed potatoes if you want to exchange them.
Ross: Y'know if we ever go to war and youre captured, youre in for a big surprise.
Joey: Ok all right, no, no, no, no, I do, I do, I do, I need your help, but Chandler I don�t know if I can take anymoreplucking. It hurts so bad!
Rachel: Wow! If only more people knew.
Chandler: Well y'know, what if she didnt actually sleep with the guy?
Joey: Thanks man, but I think it makes a stronger statement if I ask for it myself, y'know.
Liam: In fact were playing a game at the park tomorrow. Youre welcome to play too if you want.
Chandler: Let me tell you why you need to pick me. (Goes to sit on the couch facing backwards to the kitchen. Rachel gets a chair and sits opposite him) See, when I was a kid, I was always left out of everything, you know, and it really made me feel... insecure. You know, I was always picked last in gym. Even behind that big fat exchange student who didn't even know the rules to baseball. I mean, this guy would strike out and then run to third. Anyway, If I'm the only one left out of this wedding, I just know that all those feelings are gonna come rushing back.
Phoebe: I know! But if I didnt work there, what else would I do?
Monica: Thats because their nerves are probably deadened from being so stupid. But hey, y'know if you dont believe me, please, by my guest.
Rachel: What if I clean your bathroom for a month?
Ross: Look, I-I dont want to miss anymore baby stuff. So Here. Heres my new pager number, okay? Anytime anything pregnancy related happens use it! Ill be there! Okay? I dont care if its three in the morning and all you want is ice cream.
Joey: If you didnt want to play, why did you come to the party?
Rachel: Chandler, thats not enough. I mean what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents, and a bunch of little presents? And youve just gotten her one great present? I mean thats just gonna make her feel bad. Why would you do that to her Chandler? Why? Why?
Joey: All right. Okay. Well this is the same kind of deal. If youre going to do something wrong, (He grabs two steaks from the freezer) do it right!
Rachel: Hi! So Im out having lunch at Monicas and this guy starts talking to me, and it turns out he works for a buyer at Bloomingdales and there happens to be an opening in his department. So I gave him my phone number and hes gonna call me this weekend to see if he can get me an interview!
Monica: All right look, if I take Chandler out of the running will you be able to focus?
Ross: See but, Pheebs that-that is the exact opposite intent of my music. Yknow my music is-is meant to inspire, and if it bothers you this much, then I I wont play anymore.
Phoebe: Not if I get there first.
Carol: (screaming at Ross) Oh, what do you know? No one's going up to you and saying, "Hi, is that your nostril? Mind if we push this pot roast through it?"
Monica: Would you stop? Weve only been going out a couple of weeks, I mean we dont even know if hes gonna propose.
Rachel: (motioning to a rack) So now, these are all the tuxedos that we make and if theres anything that you like, we can make you a deal. Anything at all. (Grabs a few) But these are the three that Monica pre-approved.
Joey: If the Homo Sapiens, were in fact Homo-sapien, is that why there extinct?
Joey: You cant just ignore the bet! Its a bet! You bet and you bet and if you lose, you lose the bet!
Monica: Or if you want to kiss him, umm, you could use mistletoe.
Monica: Well, if we owe it? (She throws down her cleaning stuff and jumps into his arms.) Oh my When is Joey gonna be home?
Chandler: You wanna see if we still have it?
Ross: Here they come, here they come. Oh-ho, if she kisses him goodnight, Im gonna kill myself, I swear. I cant, I cant watch this. (turns away, then quickly turns to look again) Come on, date over! Date over! Uh-oh, here we go, shes going in.
Joey: Chandler, if it really hurts that bad you should just tell her.
Dina: Were gonna be all right. I mean, even if were not married this baby is gonna be so loved. Not just by us.
Kim: Forget it Rachel! We're both so proud of how well you're doing. I'm not gonna let you blow it. In fact, if I catch you with a cigarette, you're fired. So go on, get out of here! Go on, I don't want you breathing this stuff! Go on!
Rachel: Yeah hon, it cant hurt to put your name down! I mean in if two years if youre not engaged you just dont use it.
ROSS: No, um, see 'cause that, that is, that is the staging area. If you go in there, it'll ruin the whole illusion of the party. Yeah, I think you take your scotch back in there and I will get your cigarettes for you sir.
Sarah: Could you do me one favor, if its not too much trouble?
Joey: I want you to like her! But if that's too damned difficult for you, then the least you can do is pretend.
Rachel: All right, okay, look, what if you could keep the apartment and get the tickets?
Monica: Come on! Come on, if we have sex again itll double our chances of getting pregnant. Do you think that closets still available?
Joey: Hey! Dont do the crime if you cant do the time.
Joey: You think it would be okay if I asked out your sister?
Chandler: You mind if I
Monica: Honey, we've been trying to have a baby for over a year. I think it's a good idea to find out if everything's ok. Just a few routine tests.
Monica: Hey, we would still be living here if hadnt gotten the question wrong!
Chandler: It's a tradition, like the parade. If the parade decided it was gay, moved out, and abandoned its entire family.
Rachel: Ross? Look, whatever this relationship stuff that Emily wants, just give it to her. Come on, the bottom line here is that you love her. So just fix whatever she wants fixed. Just do it. (The phone starts ringing.) I mean, you're gonna have to try. You'll just gonna hate yourself if you don't. (The phone keeps ringing.) Oh come on answer it! It's driving me crazy!
Chandler: Well, yeah, but y'know, what-what if I was wrong?
Rachel: Mon, if uh you were at lunch alone, how come it cost you uh 53 dollars?
Chandler: Oh, yeah. (Starts to take it off and then realizes) Uh, no you cant have my jacket! Because then I would be cold! If you thought that you were going to be cold, you shouldve brought your own jacket. But uh, other than that, are you okay? Are you okay?
Man: Well umm, if you have sometime yknow and maybe you might want to visit someone else
Emily: All right, all right, if you insist on doing this, at least let me help you.
ROSS: You know what? You know what? If, things were the other way around, there's nothing you could put on a list that would ever make me not want to be with you.
Chandler: Hey, can I talk to you about this groomsman thing? If you pick Ross, he'll walk you down the isle just fine. But if you choose me, you'll be getting some comedy!
Rachel: All right, listen, missy. If you want this cart, you're gonna have to take me with it!
Joey: If anything should happen to him
Joey: Yeah, but what if he doesnt? Hes such a good duck.
Monica: I just thought that if I could follow the wire I could find out what it did.
Chandler: Okay, if you see a little version of me in there? Kill it!
Joey: Oh yeah? (Puts the hat on.) If youre gonna make me choose between you and the hat? I choose the hat.
PHOEBE: Hi, um, I just thought that it would be fun if the three of us had some beers and got to know each other.
Ross: But-but, if you dont love this, well do it in any other place at any other time. Really, its fine, whatever you want.
ROSS: Look, that has nothing to do with this, ok? She's my ex-wife. If she were marrying a guy, none of you'd expect me to be there.
Monica: Listen, uh, you told me something that was really difficult for you. And I, I-I figured if you could be honest, then I can to.
Rachel: But yknow what, if you think its gonna be okay well just work out a system. Yknow, itll be like college, Ill hang a hanger on the door and put a sign, "Come back later, Im gettin lucky." (Laughs.)
Mrs. Waltham: Well, if youre on e of Rosss best friends, why arent you here?
Chandler: Lets just say if I cant find the right CD case I just put it in the nearest one.
Monica: (starting to get up) I gotta go water Pete's plants. (stops) Y'know what, if he's gonna break up with me, maybe I won't water his plants.
Phoebe: Before I start, I just wanna say that umm, I have a cold, so if I sneeze in the middle of song, it's not on purpose. Oh, except the last verse of Pepper People. (Starts to sing) Smelly cat, smelly cat. What are they feeding you? (Stops singing) This chick sounds good. (Singing) Smelly cat, smelly--(stops singing) Hey Gunther, be a good little boy and bring me a whiskey.
Ross: And, I dont know, if it starts to rain
Fat Monica: Umm, Chandler, if you want I can make you some macaroni and cheese for dinner.
Rachel: Look, If I dont get to London!! He is going to marry that other girl!!!
Passenger: If youre planning on doing that throughout the entire flight. Please tell me now. So that I could that a sedative...or perhaps slip you one.
Rachel: I uh, I have two tickets to the Knicks game tonight if youre interested, just as a thank you for this week.
Chandler: Look, the only way I will even consider this is if they offer a lot more than just season seats.
Phoebe: Well, hey, what if Kenny were the real brains behind the whole company? You know. What if Kenny hired that Ralph Lauren guy to be the pretty front man? Huh, did she ever think of that?
Phoebe: Okay, Jasmine, can you, can you ask Mr. Whiffler if he can wait for like five minutes.
Monica: Oh, its so beautiful. Ohh! Yknow, I-I dont know if I feel right about this.
Emily: Its not the pants. Its you that is backwards. And if, and if you dont understand how important this is to me, well then, perhaps we shouldnt get married at all! (She storms out.)
Emily: (on answering machine) Hello Ross? It's Emily. (Rachel runs back into the room with the tequila.) I know this is out of the blue but uh, I'm getting married tomorrow. Well, maybe I am. I keep thinking about you and I'm wondering if-if we made a mistake giving up so fast. Are you thinking about me? Of course you're not, but if you are, call me tonight. Okay, bye.
Ross: No-no-no! Only if I promise never to see Rachel again.
Rachel: Ross do you realise this is the first time in my life Im doing something I actually care about. This is the first time in my life Im doing something that Im actually good at. I mean. if you dont get that...
Phoebe: Wow! This reminds me of the time when I was umm, living on the street and this guy offered to buy me food if I slept with him.
Rachel: Well, if it makes you feel any better, I made a fool out of myself.
Rachel: Well, I-I know you can do that too. I'm just, I'm just saying if you need somebody to talk to Hi!
Chandler: If you clear things up with Rachel then Ross never needs to find out, but you have to do it now before he hears about it and kicks your ass!
Rachel: Ross, that girl just spent the entire evening talking to your friends, asking to hear stories about you, looking through Monicas photo albums, I mean you dont do that if youre just in it for two weeks.
Monica: (hums for a while, then gives up, and in her head) If it bothers you that much, just go out and get the shoes. No. Don't do this. This is stupid! I don't have to prove anything, I'm gonna go get them...But then everyone will know. Unless I get them, and then wake up really early and put them back! ...I need help! (She buries her head in her pillow.)
Chandler: If you're cooking on the stove, does that mean that your new secret boyfriend is better in bed than Richard?
Monica: Wait. Rachel, no, hes married. Married! If you dont realize that, I cant help you.
Cynthia: God, this was really fun! I've been wondering if you were going to ask me out.
Chandler: Kind of? If you just kept this to yourself none of this would've happened.
Ross: Wait! Wait! Wait! Y'know what? Just stay. Please? It uh It would really mean a lot to me if you stayed.
Joey: Hey, if it makes you feel any better, I do it too.
Ross: Yeah well, if I know Mark, and I think I do, Id expect nothing less.
RACHEL: Yes, my wind. How do you expect me to grow if you won't let me blow?
Chandler: Why?! I mean if this guy was me and it was me who had learned that it was me who was the best you'd ever had, I'd be going like this. (He jumps up onto the table and starts doing his happy dance.)