words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, the whole gang is there including Janice.]
Phoebe: Oh, that is so unfortunate.
Phoebe: Cute naked guy is really starting to put on weight.
Ross: (to Phoebe) Sure, your dresser is missing but this she notices.
[Scene: Chandlers, Chandler is interviewing a potential roommate.]
Chandler: Yes, that is cool. Because I have models here y'know......never.
[Scene: Chandlers, Chandler is interviewing Joey.]
Chandler: (running around the apartment pointing out things) Bedroom. Bathroom. Living room. This right here is the kitchen, and thanks for coming by, (opens door) Bye-bye.
[Scene: the hallway, Monica is coming up the stairs.]
(Joey is leaving and notices Monica, as Monica notices him)
[Scene: A bar, Chandler is entering.]
Monica: Is it the Italian guy?
Rachel: (sitting at a table with some of her friends) (to waitress) Oh, um, no, no, no, no excuse me, hello. Hi. My friend ordered an onion, not an olive, and uh I ordered a rum and Diet Coke, which I dont think this is.
Rachel: Thats all right. (to her friends) I mean hard is it to get a couple drinks right, huh?
Rachel: Oh, I dont know. Well maybe its just the idea of Barry for the rest of my life. I dont know I think I feel like I need to have one last fling, y'know, just to sorta get it out of my system. (Chandler is listening in very intensely)
Rachel: Yes, his name is Barry, hes a doctor, thank you very much.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebes, Ross is on the phone, as Phoebe is walking by carrying a lamp.]
Ross: No real-, honey, really its fine, just g-go with Susan. Really, I, no, I think girls night out is a great idea. Okay, okay, bye
(There is a knock on the door, Phoebe answers it, its Mr. Heckles)
Phoebe: No, no, Mr. Heckles no one is making any noise up here.
(in the hallway, Eric is moving in)
(inside Chandlers apartment, Chandler is coming in from his bedroom, sees Mr. Heckles, and screams.)
[Scene: the hallway, Joey is moving in, Monica is leaving.]
Joey: Like you wouldnt believe. (they go into the apartment) Wow! This is a great place.
Monica: This place is really my Grandmothers. (Joey starts to take off all of his clothes, while Monica gets the glasses and pours the lemonade.) I got it from her when she moved to Florida, otherwise I could never afford a place like this. So if the landlord ever asks, Im 87 year old woman, whos afraid of her VCR. So are you thirsty?
[Scene: Monica and Phoebes, Monica is vacuuming.]
Phoebe: Its not in the apartment? (Monica gives a Come on look) Oh no. I cant believe this is happening again.
Phoebe: Okay, this is what Im talking about, this. I-I need to live in a land where people can spill.
Phoebe: Aw, honey its not your fault, y'know this is who you are, and I love you, and I want us to be friends, and if I keep living here I dont see that happening.
Phoebe: No youre not, youre wondering which cushion it is.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, (now) Joey is watching Baywatch, as Chandler enters from his bedroom.]
[Scene: Monicas, Monica is coming out of the bathroom wearing nothing but a towel, as Chandler is entering.]
Monica: I dont understand, I mean am I so hard to live, is this why I dont have a boyfriend?
[Scene: the bar, Ross is entering, Phoebe is at the bar, they are the only two in the place.]
Ross: (all depressed) Hi. Where is everybody?
Phoebe: Oh, its already closed, Chris gave me the keys to lock up-what is wrong?
Ross: My marriage, I think my marriage is um, is kinda over.
Ross: Cause Carols a lesbian. (Phoebe is shocked) And, and Im not one. And apparently its not a mix and match situation.
Ross: (sets out a bunch of shot glasses and starts to poor himself a drink, many drinks) Im an idiot. I mean shoulda seen it, I mean Carol and Id be out and shed, shed see some beautiful woman, and, and shed be Ross y'know look at her, and Id think, God, my wife is cool!
Phoebe: Aw! Hey, do you think that Susan person is her lover?
Chandler: Umm, this is nice.
Monica: I know, it is isnt it?
Chandler: No, I mean it, this feels really good. Is it a hundred percent cotton?
[Scene: the bar, Phoebe is still hugging Ross.]
Ross: My foot is stuck in the pocket.
[Scene: the bar, Chandler is playing pool, as Rachel enters.]
MR. TREEGER: There she is. And over there, that's the other one. This is Mr. Buddy Boyle, Mr. Heckles' attorney. He'd like to talk to you.
Phoebe: Thats all right, Ill work here. This is goo, next to this plant. (She picks a place in the lobby next to a plant.)
Rachel: Look Joey, Im sorry if-if you thought that was mean, but I gotta tell ya something. That was not mean. Okay, my father is mean. He used to yell at me all the time on the boat, I mean it was horrible. I was just being a good teacher.
Joey: Because I think this character is going to be suspicious about stuff.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Ross are finally breaking up for good, or is it?]
Mrs. Bing: Dennis is a dear old friend and a fantastic lover.
Rachel: What? (Joey starts offering Ross some turkey.) Oh yknow what? Can we please keep the chicken and the turkey and everything on the other side of the table? The smell is just yuck!
Ticket Agent: This is the final boarding call for Flight 009.
Ross: Beef in a dessert?! I- no no no, there is no way!
Mr. Treeger:: Yeah, well your friends are in violation of it. Ive been a nice guy up until now, but uh, I dont need this grief. Im gonna call the landlord and tell him that Monica is illegally subletting here grandmothers apartment. Your friends are outta here pal.
Chandler: Yeah, Ross sure is a great guy, yknow Ive always felt that how a young man turns out is a reflection on his father.
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross is getting coffee at the counter. Chandler walks in.]
Joey: (angrily and monotone) Any one of the brilliant actresses nominated for this award tonight deserves to take it home. Unfortunately only one can. (Shakes his head in disgust.) The nominees for Best Supporting Actress are from Passions Erin Goff. (There is applause, which Joey disgustedly waits to dye out.) From One Life to Live Mary Loren Bishop (They start to applaud again, but Joey interrupts in with the rest of the nominees), from All My Children Sarah Mchann, and from Days of Our Lives Jessica Ashley. And the winner is (Opens the envelope) Jessica Ashley from Days of Our Lives. (Applause) Uh, unfortunately Jessica couldnt be with us tonight so Ill be accepting this award on her behalf. (Realizes something) And Im sure that Jessica would like to thank my parents who always believed in me. Shed also like to thank my friends, Chandler, Monica, Ross, Phoebe, and Rachel whos sittin right there! (Points at Rachel.) (The music starts and his microphone is turned off, this angers Joey again and he disgustedly exits.)
Phoebe: You are useless! Freaking out about commitment is the one thing you can do! The one thing! And you can't even do that right! God!
This is a special out takes episode. The cast and Conan are sitting around the set of Central Perk, talking about the stuff weve never seen.
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross is sitting on the couch reading a magazine as Mona enters.]
Joey: No! No! No! You guys were totally right! This is so much better than the first time we went out. Yknow? That was so awkward, we were really nervous.
[Scene: The Girls apartment. Phoebe is dialing the phone and Rachel runs in the door.]
Phoebe: Yeah, and-and leaving us to go see hot dancer girls is not very Thanksgivingy.
Phoebe: Oh, my first massage today is this incredibly gorgeous guy, and every time I see him I just want to do things to him that Im not allowed to charge for.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross has just finished putting Ben to sleep, and is entering from Rachels room.]
Rachel: (deadpan) Oh look who it is, my husband. The apple of my eye.
The Head Librarian: We are aware of the problem you are referring too. (He turns to look at the previous librarian.) But as far as increasing security, Im afraid the library is very understaffed. I, I cant help you.
Phoebe: Oh, you’re right! I was just kidding about Rachel. Babysitting is a gas!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They are hauling out the porcelain dog from Joey's room. Chandler is holding the dog by the rear in a rather interesting position.]
Video:April Twelve, Eighteen hundred, Sixty-One (Monica lights Richard's cigar butt), 4:30 A.M. on Tuesday, the United States garrison at Fort Sumter was fired upon (knock on door) it is now under bombardment by....
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is still trying to get Ben to play with something other than the Barbi doll.]
Chandler: (Looking out at the balcony) So tell me something, is leaving the Christmas lights up part of your plan to keep us merry all year long?
Chandler: Yeah (motions them to sit and they do) I'm not having an affair. Nancy is our realtor.
(They quickly take their places and Here Comes the Bride Begins to play. Everyone seated looks back. Emily is being escorted up the aisle by her father. She kisses him on the cheek and takes her place by Rosss side.)
Phoebe: Oh my God! I killed him! I killed another one! And this curse is getting stronger too, to bring down something that big.
Robert: Jeez, thank you really that is so nice. But um, to be honest, I dont think I can wear these, theyre so tight, I feel like Im on display. Im sorry.
Kathy: Acting! Chandler, this is my job! Im-Im playing a part in a play! How can you not trust me?!
Matthew: It is when were able to crack each other up.
Joey: Wow! I cant believe this! This is incredible. I mean you just won an Oscar!
ROSS: Mom, there are so many people in my life. Some of them are seeing people and some of them aren't. Is that crystal?
MONICA: Nooo! Never! I mean, we're living in the moment. God, it is so nice for once to not have to get all hung up on 'Where is this going?'
(He throws down his plate and runs to the wine cellar, Monica is about to follow him but is intercepted by Rachel.)
[Scene: Library. Phoebe is getting ready to sing for the kids. Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there.]
Monica: Whew. Although yknow, this is part of a salt and pepper set. I mean I guess yknow it may just count as a half a present. What do you think?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is whining to Chandler about the tickets.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is watching Joey pace nervously as Rachel enters.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is looking around the shop as Phoebe returns from getting some more coffee.]
[Scene: Rachels birthday, a time lapse has occurred. Rachel is coming back into the living room carrying a notepad.]
Ross: All were saying is dont rush into anything.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Ross is entering looking for Joey, but instead he finds Paul and Rachel making out on the couch.]
Rachel: Ugh, is she pregnant yet? She doesnt need to be; shell still have the baby before I do. Oh Ross, another contraction! (Leans back on Ross for some support.)
Phoebe: That is brand new information!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is siting on the couch as Ross and Chandler enter after playing basketball.]
Susan: The woman I love is having a baby today. I've been waiting for this just as much as you have.
[Scene: Rosss apartment, Rachel is entering as Ross comes out of the kitchen carrying popcorn.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel has just gotten home and is going through the mail. She finds something that's Monica's and goes over and knocks on her closed bedroom door.]
ROSS: Hey, Rach, you know what? I think, I think I know what'll make you feel better. How 'bout you make a list about me. RACHEL: Wha... forget it Ross, no, I am not gonna stand here and make a list of. . . ROSS: C'mon Rachel. RACHEL: OK, you're whiney, you are, you're obsessive, you are insecure, you're, you're gutless, you know, you don't ever, you don't just sort of seize the day, you know. You like me for what, a year, you didn't do anything about it. And, uh, oh, you wear too much of that gel in your hair. ROSS: See there, you uhh, alright, ya, you did what I said. RACHEL: Yeah, and you know what? You're right, I do feel better, thank you Ross. [she walks off and Ross puts his hand to his hair] [Scene: Back at Phoebe's. She is on the phone] PHOEBE: Yeah, um, in Albany, can I have the number of Frank Buffay. . . OK, um, in Ithica. . . alright, um, Saratoga. . . Oneonta. Alright, you know what, you shouldn't call youself information. [hangs up] [Phoebe's grandmother enters] GRANDMOTHER: Hey. PHOEBE: Hello grandma, if that is in fact your real name. GRANDMOTHER: C'mon now Phoe, don't still be mad at me. How's it going? PHOEBE: Well, not so good. Upstate's pretty big, he's pretty small, you do the math. GRANDMOTHER: Well, I think you're better off without him. Oh honey, I know he's your daddy but, but to me he's still the irresponsible creep who knocked up your mom and stole her Gremlin. PHOEBE: No I just, just wanted to know who he was, ya know. GRANDMOTHER: I know. OK, I wasn't completely honest with you when I told you that, uh, I didn't know exactly where he lived. PHOEBE: Whattaya mean? GRANDMOTHER: He lives at 74 Laurel Drive in Middletown. If you hit the Dairy Queen, you've gone too far. You can take my cab. PHOEBE: Wow. Thank you. GRANDMOTHER: Now, remember, nobody else drives that cab. PHOEBE: Uh-huh, got it. Ooh, I'm gonna see my dad. Wish me luck, Grandpa! [blows a kiss to a picture of Einstein]
Rachel: Well, actually, I meant for me. The hiring committee is meeting people all day and
Phoebe: Oh, yeah try that. (He finishes and looks at her.) So, is that better?
Rachel: (coming out of her bedroom with a necklace) Here it is! I love it. I wear it all the time.
[Scene: Chandler and Eddie's apartment. Chandler is there. There's a knock at the door. He answers it to see a young woman holding a fishtank.]
Rachel: (on phone) Hello?(Listens) Mindy! Hi! Hey, how are you? (Listens) Yes, yes, I've heard, congratulations, that is so great. (Listens) Really? (Listens) Oh. (Listens) Okay. Okay, well I'm working tomorrow, but if you want you can, you can, you can come by and... (Listens) Okay... (Listens) Great... (Listens) Great... (Listens) All right, so I'll, so I'll see you tomorrow! (Listens) Okay.. (Listens) Okay... (Listens) Bye. (Hangs up and sits down heavily.) Oh God. Oh God. Oh God.
Rachel: Joey look, just look at it this way, the sooner Phoebe breaks Chandler the sooner this is all over and out in the open.
MONICA: Really?� But tomorrow night is the only night I get off from the restaurant.� If you go to the game, we won't have a night together for another week.
Monica: (following her) Phoebe! I have to have those earrings, we're going to leave as soon as the show is over.
Joey: But the drawer full of take-out menus is okay, right?
[Cut to the Men's room. Chandler is practicing flashing his badge as Monica enters.]
Nurse: I dont think the next patient is very far along.
Joanna: Oh no, no-no-no, is he ah, married, or involved with anyone?
Phoebe: It’s for our wedding day! Right, now, is this guy gay or straight, because one of us gonna have to start flirting.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is returning from a date with Josh, and when they get the door open, Rachel turns and passionately kisses Josh.]
Tag: I, uh, wanted to see if your offer to spend Thanksgiving with you is still good.
Joey: Oh-oh-oh-oh, how I do it is, I look a woman up and down and say, "Hey, how you doin?"
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, with the giant entertainment center Joey is exiting from his room.]
Ross: Yes it is. See. (Shows them the piece of paper she gave him with her name and phone number on it.)
[Scene: The hospital, Ross and Monica are in Phoebes room. Phoebe is in the bathroom and Monica notices smoke coming out from underneath the door.]
Ross: 11, unbelievable, 11 is correct. (The guys celebrate.)
Joey (staring at the cake): Uh.. is it ok that I still think it looks delicious?
Charlie: (to Joey) So, I have to go shopping today, which is my least favourite thing, I'm soo bad at picking out clothes!
Ross: This is the coolest house ever!!
Ross: (in a deep voice) I'll have whatever Christine is having.
RACH: I can see that. I... just one phone call, I'll be very quick, I'll even pay for it myself. [man is still reluctant] OK, you're bein' a little weird about your phone.
MONICA: I can't believe Joey's having lunch with his stalker. What i-, what is she like.
Joey: Good evening. Im Mr. Tribbiani. And I will be teaching acting for soap operas. Now um, on my first day as (proudly) Dr. Drake Remoray on Days of Our Lives, (looks for a reaction from his students, and gets none.) I learned that one of the most important things in soap opera acting is reacting, this does not mean acting again, it means, you dont have a line, but someone else just did. And it goes like this. (looks all intense for a moment and then gasps, the students cheer him) Thanks, thanks, a lot. Oh, by the way, before I forget to work in soap operas some of you will have to become much more attractive. All right, moving right along.
Ross: You? You! Want to watch Ben? (in the background Monica mouths Dont worry, Ill be here the whole time. to Ross.) Yes! Thatd be great, no, I just wanted to ask Monica, because I know how empty her life is. (Monica sarcastically mouths Yeah! and holds up her thumb.)
Young Ethan: Uuh, before we get into any staying-over-stuff, there is something you should know.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is balancing a mini hockey stick on his hand as Chandler enters from his room carrying a bunch of bills.]
Chandler: Oh, sure, she was probably up all night, excited about the party she knows is happening.
(Ross and Emilys parents are seated at a table. Ross is between them and they are discussing the wedding bill.)
[Scene: Chandlers office, he is just finishing a meeting with his boss.]
Joey: Chandler, I can't be playing games, Ross is gonna be home soon. And I have to write five whole pages if I'm gonna stick to his schedule.
Joey: (sitting at his table) Oh, I know it... It is amazing these little things open doors... huh! (mimes opening a door with his own keys, Phoebe looks at him in a "yeah, yeah, yeah" way.)
ROSS: Good, good, good. So, is uh, was your moustache, did, used to be different?
Phoebe: Because this one is now! And-and its two of our best friends! Who knows what youre gonna marry!
Monica: You have to help me! Im supposed to be writing my vows and all I have is this! (Shows them what shes been working on.)
[Scene: The delivery room at the hospital. Monica, Chandler and Erica are there. Erica is in labor, and she is breathing heavily.]
(They all turn and with shocked looks on their faces stare at Ross. Ross is at a loss for words at this moment.)
[Scene: The Banquet Room, Ross is taking a picture of a plant, Chandler a fork. The band stops.]
Bob: Its Bob actually. Hey, you work up here, can you tell me where this Chandler Bings office is?
Rachel: Phoebe the father is not here okay? I havent told him yet and I dont think I can tell him at all now!
Ross: Oh Donald that-that would be great. I am totally ready to come back to work. IWhat? (He notices something through the window.) No! Wh What are you doing?!! (Dr. Ledbetter is slowly backing away.) GET OFF MY SISTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Joey: (looking out the window) Ewww! Ugly Naked Guy is using his new hammock. Its like a Play-Doo Fat Factory.
Monica: (pointing at Rachel) De-caff. (to All) Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (to Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Ross is eating breakfast with Joey and Monica. Joey is walking towards Ross.]