words in movies
Joey's Doctor: Mr. Tribbiani, I'm afraid you've got kidney stones.
Joey's Doctor: It's kidney stones.
Joey's Doctor: Kidney stones!
[Scene: Joey's room, his doctor, Chandler, and Monica are there.]
Joey's Doctor: Kidney stones! Now, ordinarily Mr. Tribbiani, we try to break up the stones up with shock waves, but they're to close to the bladder now. Which means we can either wait for you to pass them or else go up the urethra
[Cut to Joey's room, who's going throw his own contractions. Plus, he has Ross in a headlock.]
[Cut to Joey's room, his doctor and Ross are there.]
Joey's Doctor: Are you ready? It's time to try peeing. (Joey makes a face like he is trying to pee.) Wait-wait-wait-wait-wait! It's almost time to try peeing. (Points at the bottle Joey is to pee into.)
[Scene: Joey's room, he is recovering from his birth.]
Joey's Doctor: Would you like to see them? (He hands Joey a little jar.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They are watching a Miracle Wax info-mercial.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is watching Yasmein Bleeth running on TV, and the duck starts quacking.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Phoebe, and Ross are there eating pizza as Rachel enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross is writing on the Magna-Doodle as Rachel enters.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, its the middle of the night. Joey is walking into the living room, and runs into the entertainment centre.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler and Janice are having dinner]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Ross is sitting at the bar, Chandler serves up two mugs of hot water.]
Phoebe: Oh, look-look, Joey's on TV! Isn't that great? My pledge got Joey on TV! Oh that makes me feelOh no! (Realizes that her deed made her happy and therefore it's selfish and covers her mouth in horror.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are there. Phoebe is stressing out about something.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler and Joey are lamenting about how they kicked Ross out.]
(An old West style showdown starts with Joey and the Hombre Man staring each other down as the store guy slowly lets in the first customer while Joey and the Hombre Man get ready to draw. In slow motion they spot the customer, eye each other, draw, and as the customer walks into the middle Joey's bottle misfires but the Hombre Man spays it into the customer's eyes.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Monica and Chandler are making out on one of the chairs.]
Chandler: Well, they're Joey's! They gotta be Joey's!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is balancing a mini hockey stick on his hand as Chandler enters from his room carrying a bunch of bills.]
Chandler: So I have a flaw! Big deal! Like Joey's constant knuckle-cracking isn't annoying? And Ross, with his over-pronouncing every single word? And Monica, with that snort when she laughs? I mean, what the hell is that thing? ...I accept all those flaws, why can't you accept me for this?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is playing that string game with the two hands and the weird crossing patterns as Chandler enters with the mail.]
Ross: Unbelievable! I mean you really kept Joey's underwear?! Why? Why would you do that?!
Ross: Joey's not going.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is in his sweats flinging playing cards into a pot.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, its after Ross and Joeys talk with Frank, and Phoebes is finding out what happened.]
Chandler: You know what? You know what? I think we're making too big a deal out of this. ok? So we pay our bills a little late this month and maybe next month we cut back on a few things. And maybe we start eating out of Joey's refrigerator for a change. You're chef... what can you make out of backing soda and beer?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey is still watching the porn as Chandler enters.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is returning from his disastrous weekend. He throws his bag down and sits down on one of the leather chairs, but he sits on something and picks it up and throws it away.]
[Scene: Estelle's (Joey's Agent) Office, Joey is there.]
[Scene: The Telethon, Joey's phone rings and he answers it.]
[Scene: Hallway outside Chandler and Joey's apartment. Eddie walks up.]
[Scene: A Theater, the gang is in the audience wating for a play of Joey's to start.]
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Joey's having breakfast; Phoebe enters the room carrying her wedding dress.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross still has boxes all over the place. Joey is wearing a football helmet, and Chandler is spinning him around in one of the chairs and counting.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Monica, Rachel, and the guys are watching Days of Our Lives.]
(Ross and Chandler start to read Joey's script aloud.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey is getting ready for a fishing trip and Phoebe is asking him about the fishing lures. Ross is playing with the rod, and Monica is pretty much just watching the on goings.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler is on the phone with a computer hotline.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's and Ross's, Ross is working on his computer and Joey is making a lot of noise.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is watching TV as Chandler enters.]
Ross: Sure. (He opens the door to Joey. Needless to say, Joey's stunned.) Joey
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler and Joey are sitting at the bar, in their bathrobes, eating cereal]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Chandler are talking.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is watching TV.]
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Joey and Sandy are sitting at the kitchen counter. Joey is holding mr. Wigglemunch, and Sandy holds the Grumpus.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is on her dinner date with Joshua.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross is lamenting to Chandler and Rachel about his troubles in his new building.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is walking into the living room having just gotten up in the middle of the night.]
Joey's Hand Twin: Oh-ho, yeah. Yeah, the hand guy.
[Scene: Ben and Joey's (Isn't that an ice cream??) callback.]
Joey's Date: Ew, yknow what? One time I saw this guy from behind and he seemed like a totally normal guy and then he turned around and it was Stephan Baldwin!
Joey's Hand Twin: That's okay. (Walks out.)
Joey's Hand Twin: Excuse me?
Joey's Hand Twin: Do I know you?
Joey's Hand Twin: (To Joey) 14.
Joey's Hand Twin: Nothing?
Joey's Hand Twin: Stop it!
Joey's Hand Twin: Are you gonna play?
[Scene: Joey's audition, the director has returned and wants to see the combination.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross, Joey, and Rachel are watching rugby on TV as Phoebe enters.]
Joey's Hand Twin: Please stop it!
Joey's Hand Twin: Please, please take him too. (Motions to Joey.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Joey, and Chandler are sitting and talking as Phoebe and Rachel enter.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is coming from across the hall.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is sitting at the counter reading a magazine as the phone rings.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is packing some books and Joey is watching him.]
[Cut to Chandler and Joey's, Ross is seen throwing the ball into the bathroom, presumably where Joey is currently using the facilities.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, (Ohh, thats the last time Im ever gonna type that line. Its just so sad.) Joey is entering, angrily.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is trying to figure out what to do.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is entering carrying two pizzas.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, the guys are now trying to figure out what next to do, since their plan with the stripper backfired on them.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is talking to Phoebe about her suggestion.]
Chandler: Uhh, Joey's grandmother is right there. (Points)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, they are just finishing up another game of foosball.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey is debriefing Rachel on her rejection earlier that day and telling her what she shouldve done. Ross and Phoebe are watching.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is showing off the entertainment center.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, erm, Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is there and is getting ready to direct a bunch of strippers, Monica, Rachel, and Phoebe on what to do in the upcoming orgy of lesbian lust. Yes, its a dream sequence, this isnt cable.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, the next morning, Monica and Phoebe are eating breakfast.]
Joey: Oh yeah! For every dollar Shutter Speed makes, one penny of it goes right in Joey's pocket.
[Scene: Joey's audition, he is with bag.]
[Scene: Joey's apartment, the next morning, Rachel is passed out on the couch.]
JOEY: [walks out of his room] Hey, this is ridiculous. I'll tell you what. After I get back from my neice's christening, I'll go down to the coffee house with you and we'll all have a nice cup of coffee alright. No problem, Joey's there.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Monica is cooking and Rachel is getting ready for a date with Joshua.]
(Suddenly, the tape cuts away from Joey's impromptu scene, to Chandler standing really, really close to the camera.)
[Scene: Joey's apartment, Rachel is now three sheets to the wind and Joey is watching her.]
Joey's Hand Twin: (tries to leave) I have to get back to
Donny Osmond: Yeah! Welcome, it is Soap Opera week here on Pyramid, let's meet our contestants. First, Gene Lester is a database specialist, he's gonna be playing with "Days of Our Life's" star Joey Tribbiani! (Joey's amazed at the place and he keeps looking around till he realizes the audience is applauding him)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, theyre still playing Cups.]
Joey's Hand Twin: You can't sit here if you're not gonna play.
[Scene: A blackjack table, it's the same one Joey's hand twin was working at, only he's not there anymore and has been replaced by a beautiful woman.]
Chandler: Joey's tailor...took advantage of me.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is there to watch Joey's first scene as Dr. Drake Remoray.]
[Joey's. Playing ping pong by himself.]
[The next flashback is from The One With Ross's New Girlfriend. Chandler is telling Ross and Joey that Joey's tailor took advantage of him.]
[Scene: Joey's apartment, Joey is now showing Rachel around.]
Chandler: (following him) I'm telling you, I watched the tape. (Reaches Joey's room and Joey slams the door in his face)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, erm, Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are returning from the strip club.]
Monica: Wait a minute, are you doing Joey's (sadly) "Audition didn't go so well. (Happily) Yeah it did?"
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is returning and finds Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is playing living room golf as Rachel enters. Rachel sees this and holds the door open until Chandler is ready to start his swing, when he is, she slams the door shut which causes the club to fly from his hands. He turns around, shocked.]
[Scene: Joey's apartment, (The one he had when he was Dr. Drake Remoray, because he still is.) Rachel is there and admiring the big ceramic fake dog.]
Monica: Hey, Joey's ass! What are you doing?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Chandler are watching TV as Joey enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are about to read another one of Joey's efforts.]
Joey's Hand Twin: (To Joey) If you leave now, I will chop off my hand and give it too you!