words in movies
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler, Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe are standing around the table drinking champagne as Ross enters.]
Joey: (grabbing the candy bar) Yeah Ill take that.
Joey: Yeah, shes been out there for twenty minutes, Im surprised you didnt hear her on the way over.
Chandler: (To Ross) Okay, you get her in here. (To Joey) You bolt the door. Ill be in the closet.
Joey: But I-I-I cant stay too long, I gotta get up early for a commercial audition tomorrow and I gotta look good. Im supposed to be playing a 19-year-old. (Everyone stops in their tracks upon hearing this.) What?
Joey: You guys dont think I look 19?
(They all leave and Joey comes back in quickly.)
Joey: (To Phoebe) Hey, is uh the rest of my candy bar around here?
Joey: I was afraid of that.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Chandler is looking at the foosball table.]
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Chandler is playing Playstation, Crash Team Racing to be exact (hes in last on Hot Air Skyway to be more exact) as Joey enters from his room desperately trying to look like a 19-year-old. Hes got the wool cap, hes got the cut-off Knicks jersey over the faded T-shirt, and hes got the whole pants-around-the-knees-showing-off-the-boxers thing that rich, white, suburban kids have adopted in a desperate and extremely futile attempt to try to look like theyre from the inner-city.]
Joey: Sup? Sup dude?
Joey: So youre playing a little Playstation, huh? Thats whack! Playstation is whack! Sup with the whack Playstation, sup?! Huh? Come on, am I 19 or what?!
Joey: Come on man, really how old?!
Joey: Wow thanks! (He goes into his bedroom and closes the door.)
Joey: Yeah!
Joey: When? Today? Some, not a lot.
Joey: Dont worry about that man, that happens.
Joey: Yeah! Once.
Joey: I did it anyway.
(Chandler and Joey enter and overhear that.)
Joey: Oh my God! I cannot believe you guys are talking about this! The problems in the bedroom are between the man and the woman!!! All right?!! Now Chandler is doing the best he can!!
Joey: What?
Joey: You guys kissed! Oh mythis is huge!
Joey: Monica-Monica-Monica-Monica, listen-listen, listen, listen, would-would it make you feel better if we all stop talking about Ross and Rachel.
Joey: You got it. Okay. Now, I can pass for 19 right?!
Joey: Really?
Joey: Seriously?
Joey: (gasps) Im 30!
Rachel: Joey, you are not! Youre 31.
Joey: (realizes) Aww crap!
Joey: Psss, that is whack!
[Time lapse, Phoebe is playing the guitar for Joey.]
Phoebe: (shes strumming something) Yeah? (Joey nods yes.) Okay, I think Ill play it at the wedding.
Joey: Yeah! Well, I think well see if they actually let you play. Huh? I mean they tell you anything you want to hear like-like, "You look 19," and then they just take it away like-like, "No you dont."
Joey: Wouldnt she?
Joey: Would she? (He smells something and gasps as he realizes what it is.) You ate my candy bar!
[Cut to the living room, Joey is eating a sandwich.)
Joey: They break your heart, dont they?
Joey: Yeah! If you wanna sing at their wedding, well you sing at their wedding!
Joey: What?! Whats wrong with my eyes.
Phoebe: They give you away! Theres just-theres just too much wisdom in there. (Joey nods in agreement.) Just put some tea bags on there for like 15 minutes.
Joey: And thatll get rid of my wisdom?
Joey: Oh!
Joey: Ketchup!
Joey: Oh.
Joey: Relish!
Joey: Paper, snow, a ghost!
Joey: Paper, snow, a ghost!
Joey: Yeah...
Joey: A rock, a dog, the earth.
Donny: Oh, time's up! Joey! You were, uh, almost on a roll there...
Joey: Oh, wow! I'm so sorry, ok? I promise, we'll do better next time!
JOEY: Yeah, unless you hook up with a bunch of pigeons.
Joey: Hey, it's a lot harder than it looks! Okay? (Quietly) She-she-she's hurting me.
Joey: (smiling from ear to ear) Ah-haah! I win!!
Joey: Uuuh.. yes, they are my stuffed clams.
Joey: (out of his Monica character) Very good! Drawing on your own experience, I like that!
Joey: Chickens?
Joey: Enough said, I'm there for you man. Where is she, upstairs?
Ross: Everyone? I would like to make a toast to Rachel and Joey.
Joey: All right, Im here, lets ahh, get this over with.
Ross: Hey... I made up that joke and told it to you! (He points at Chandler. Joey gestures to Ross "What are you doing?)
Joey: (nervously) Yeah...
Joey: Hey, listen to me, listen to me you are never ever gonna be alone. Okay? I promise thats not gonna happen.
CHAN: No, no, see? See? [the printer starts to run] Hey, it's printing. [to Joey, rattled] Hey, it's printing!
Donny: Well, welcome to the Winner Circle. Joey and Gene, you guys ready?
Joey: I-I-I don't know. Types of trees?
Joey: (sympathetic) Oh, I'm so sorry. I don't know any Spanish words.
Joey: Oh, oh, oh... (5 seconds left)
Joey: Things that burn.
Joey: Things that go "tssst" when you put them out.
Joey: Oh, oh, oh... What a dog says.
Joey: Dude, dude! I think you're losing it.
Joey: Pssst...
Joey: (instantly) Pizza toppings, next!
Joey: Where? (looking around)
Joey: Girls Chandler could never get?
Joey: Anyway! Her and Ross just started yelling at each other.
Joey: (To the rest of the gang) Hey, see that? He just needed his pal to come home. All right, uh, Ive got to go memorise my lines. (Starts to go his bedroom) Me and Charlton Heston bright and early tomorrow morning! Yeah-yeah!
Joey: Yeah! You, Chan, and the vein!
Joey: They're ribbed for *your* pleasure.
Joey: So he can't come?
Phoebe: Oh, hey Joey.
Joey: Uh, hey.
Joey: (afraid) Yeah.
Joey: Seriously?
Joey: Oh no, no, no, let your dad get this.
Joey: Look, can I just stop you right there for a second? When people do this (Makes quote marks with his fingers.) I dont really know what that means. (Ross just looks at him) You were saying?
Joey: Hey, you're Mike's parents, right?
Rachel: Joey, do you have peanut butter on the back of your head?
Sandy: Actually studies have shown that the movement and colours help their cerebral development... The whimsical characters are just for us. (He winks to Joey and Rachel. Ross's face says he disapproves. Joey sees that and kind of angrily says...)
Joey: Oh, its a new TV show. Yeah. Im up for the part of Mac Macaveli or "Mac." Yeah, Im a detective and I solve crimes with the help of my robot partner. Hes a, hes a Computerized Humanoid Electronically Enhanced Secret Enforcer or-or "C.H.E.E.S.E."
Joey: Strike three! You only get one more, Mike!
[Scene: Wedding rehearsal dinner. Joey and Mike are talking.]
Joey: Strike two!
Phoebe: Oh Joey, you bummed him out! This was the happiest dog in the world, and he spends half a day with you, and look at him!
Phoebe: Why, do I have a feeling thats not as happy as it sounds? (Joey points out one going into the chipper to her, as this haunty, demonic music starts to play in the background) No! Nooooo!!! (she winces in horror and hides her face against Joeys shoulder, as she sees the tree spit out from the chipper.)
JOEY: When I was little, I wanted to be a veteranarian, but then I found out you had to put your hands into cows and stuff.
Joey: Dont worry man, I get to bring a guest. Well show him.
(Joey comes out from his room)
Joey: I can come back.
Joey: Ewwwww!
Joey: (to Mike) Hello Michael.
Mike: Joey, I kinda have a lot to do today, what do you want?
Joey: May I have a word with you, please?
Joey: It's okay. You know, I totally understand, alright? You guys, make way more sense than her and I ever did, you know. And... I want you to be happy.
Joey: (almost crying) That was ME!
Joey: And remember whatever comes up first. Okay? And hurry, because �
(Mike and Joey come out of Joey's room)
Joey: I'm glad we had this little talk.
[Scene: Joey’s apartment. Rachel and Phoebe walk in, loaded with bags.]
Joey: All right, I guess I can hold out a little longer. Let's have a game.
[Scene: Rachels Room, she is taking the ring out of Rosss jacket, looks at it, and puts it on her finger as Joey enters.]
Joey: (To Henrietta) My friend Rachel has a kid. I totally know nursery rhymes! (makes a thumbs up sign)
(Joey walks in)
Joey: Hey, what are you guys gonna do?
Joey: I don't think they are.
Joey: Yeah according to the news, most of the city did.
Phoebe: No, I don't think this was your shot. I mean, I don't even think you just get one shot. I really believe big things are gonna happen for you, I do! You've gotta just keep thinking about the day that some kid is gonna run up to his friends and go 'I got the part! I got the part! I'm gonna be Joey Tribbiani's ass!'.
Joey: Oh hey, don't worry. I'm still ordained from your wedding.
Joey: I can scratch that right off.
Joey: (whispering to Phoebe) Okay...
Joey: Oh thanks. Thanks. It was great meetin ya. And listen if any of my friends gets married, or have a birthday, or a Tuesday
Joey: Yeah?
Ross: Uh Joey...
(one of the groomsmen gives the rings to Joey)
Joey: Mike, do you take this woman to be your wife?
Joey: Oh, okay. Phoebe, do you take this man to be your husband?
(Joey has a "Yeah you do" smile on his face)
Joey: Nice. Oh hey, what about Ross?
Ross: Joey, you shouldn't lie on your résumé.
Joey: Well, so, will you help me? I really wanna be in this play.
Rachel: What? Ross and Charlie? (Joey nods) Wow! She's really making her way through the group, huh? Ah, who am I to talk?
Joey: Ok.
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Got it.
Joey: Hey.
Joey: Hi.
Joey: Really? It sounds exactly the same to me.
Monica: Joey. Erica, baby!
Joey: Oh, you know what you should do? You should walk all the way at the top of Statue of Liberty.
Joey: Oh, so we didn't win, but it's fun to play the game, right?