words in movies
Phoebe: Just wanna check my horoscope, see if it was right.
Monica: Oh my God. (Grabs Phoebe and turns her away) Phoebe. Don't look now, but behind us is a guy who has the potential to break our hearts and plunge us into a pit of depression.
Mrs. Bing: (on TV) Oh, fine. I'm leaving for New York tomorrow, which I hate- but I get to see my son, who I love...
Mrs. Bing: (on TV) Oh no, I am a fabulous mom! I bought my son his first condoms.
[Scene: The Hospital, it's a montage of Monica and Phoebe's visit to the hospital with My Guy playing in the background. It starts with Monica reading a newspaper to him.]
Mrs. Bing: Oh, Ross, listen to me. I have sold a hundred million copies of my books, and y'know why?
Joey: You don't think my mom's sexy?
Monica: I'm not really here. Just thought I'd drop these off...on the way.. my way... Do you come here a lot? Without me?
Chandler: Oh my God.
Ross: You're my friend. I-I had to tell you.
Chandler: I can't believe it. Paolo kissed my mom?
Chandler: Y'know, of all my friends, no-one knows the crap I go through with my mom more than you.
Joey: (To Ross, on the couch) Now, here's a picture of my mother and father on their wedding day. Now you tell me she's not a knockout.
You don't have to be awake to be my man, As long as you have brainwaves I'll be there to hold your hand. Though we just met the other day, There's something I have got to say...
Chandler: Because it's complicated, it's complex- Hey, you kissed my mom!
Chandler: That would be no. Look, just because you played tonsil tennis with my mom doesn't mean you know her. Alright? Trust me, you can't talk to her.
Ross: Okay, 'you' can't, or (Points to Chandler) you can't? (Chandler grabs his finger) Okay, that's my finger. (Chandler twists it and Ross goes down on one knee) That's, that's my knee. (To Central Perk) Still doing the play. Aaah!
Monica: Oh, my pleasure.
Mrs. Bing: Car's waiting downstairs, I just wanted to drop off these copies of my book for your friends. Anything you want from Lisbon?
Chandler: You kissed my best Ross! ...Or something to that effect.
Joey: Well hurry, I can't feel my ears!
Joey: Ooh! Stop putting things down my pants!
Chandler: My cranberries!
Monica: (bursting into tears) My boyfriend said he didn't like my massages.
Joey: In my spare time I uh, read to the blind. And Im also a mento for the kids.(The gang shake their heads.) Yknow a mento, a role model. (Chandler bites his fist to keep from talking.)
Ross: Chandler!!! Chandler!!! (He opens the door to the apartment but is stopped by the chain; Chandler and Monica quickly stop making out and try to get dressed.) Chandler, I saw what you were doing through the window! Chandler, I saw what you were doing to my sister! Now get out here!
Monica: Oh my God. She's gonna pick us!
Chandler: Daddy. All right look, heres the story. (Flashback to Chandler about to enter the steam room as he does the voice-over.) Well, we had just finished playing racquetball and we were gonna take a steam. I walk into the steam room and it was really steamy. (The flashback shows his glasses fog up and him trying to find his way around the steam filled room. He takes off his glasses.) So I take off my glasses and thats when in happened.
Ross: I don't know. I mean I have plenty of opportunity. Just just now there were some women at the coffee house smiled at me.And then the other day on the subway a woman "accidentally" sat on my hand.
Joey: Yeah. And look, I just want you to know that with Rachel staying here and everything, all my feelings from before are totally over, okay? And even if they weren't, when you accidentally walk in on a woman using a breast pump...
Chandler: Look, I understand, but I have to put my foot down. Okay? The answer is no.
Monica: Oh my god! Did you hear that? She said Monica! (She goes back to Clunkers again) Oooh, I can't leave her!
Joey: I don't like it when people take food off of my plate, okay?
Phoebe: (likes the jacket) No, but I like it. I think I left one of my rat babies.
Monica: I will prove it to you! Okay? About a week ago I was wearing those jeans and I dropped a pen in my lap and it left an ink stain on the crotch. Now when she comes back I will find it and show you that stain!
Rachel: My God, get a room!
Rachel: (whispering) "Dude, Where's My Car?"
CHANDLER: Question. If I don't care about my watch, can I use it as a weapon?
Mr. Geller: Look at her, my first grandchild.
Phoebe: (Delighted) oh, oh, oh! This is so great! Oh my god! This was not at all scary. Hi everybody. Hi Betty! Betty, Hi! (Thrilled) You found Betty! Oh my god! (Hugging people) This is great. Everybody I love is in the same room, (still happy) Where's Joey?
Monica: Okay. Right. Oh my God that is gonna be so hard.
Rachel: Well obviously I wont be able to come, for those of you who havent checked their calendars today is my due date. Well yknow, I just want to take a moment and thank you guys for how great youve been during this time. I really couldnt have done it without you. And I have loved these last nine months! And even though I am so looking forward to the next part, I am really gonna miss being pregnant.
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God that’s awful! What did you think of the house?
Joey: Hey Ross, this is one of my co-stars, Dirk. (To Dirk) Dirk, this is my good friend Ross. (Ross and Dirk shake hands)
Ross: Oh my God.
Rachel: Well of those things that you said in the interview, I mean if you believe any of them, I must not be a very good assistant. Yknow what? I am just gonna pack up my desk, (She goes over to get all of her belongings from the desk, which amount to a muffin and a pen) and I will be gone by the end of the day! (Realizes she has nothing.) Well, I guess theres no use to me sticking around til the end of the day! (Starts to leave.)
Jen: Oh! My number is on there. (Hands him a business card.) Give me a call.
Chandler: You want me to wash my hands first, don't you?
ESTELLE: Joey, look at me, look at me. Do I have lipstick on my teeth?
Rachel: Well, like anything can be sexy. Like umm, oh-oh, like this dishtowel! (She grabs it and starts rubbing it on her cheek.) Ooh, ooh, this feels sooo good against my cheek! And-and if I feel a little hot, I can just dab myself with it. Or I can bring it down to my side and bring it through my fingers while I talk to him.
Rachel: Are you kidding? Eight hours with my mother talking about Atkins? Good luck, Emma!
JOEY: No, I don't. It's like, ya know, you work your whole life for somethin' and you think that when you get it it's never gonna be as good as you thought it would be. But this so was. Ya know, it changed everything. Like the other day, I got this credit card application, and I was pre- approved. Huh? I've never been pre-approved for anything in my life.
Rachel: My boss, Joanna? Wow, that mustve been awkward.
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica: Oh my God! My God! We've got the house !?
Monica: In one year?! My God what did she eat? Her-her family! Thats not the point.
Ross: Dude. You're married to my sister.
MR. GELLER: Am I supposed to stand here and listen to this on my birthday?
Phoebe: Oh my God! That guy at the counter is totally checking you out!
Monica: Chandler In all my life I never thought I would be so lucky. (Starting to cry.) As to fall in love with my best my best Theres a reason why girls dont do this!
Chandler: (on phone) Laundry. Huh. Is that my new nickname? (Rachel is absolutely stunned, she opens her mouth in absolute amazement.)
Monica: Oh my God, this man is gonna get naked in my apartment!
Joey: Uuuh.. yes, they are my stuffed clams.
Chandler: Hey listen, for the first four years of my work everybody called me Sha-la-lap. (Awkward silence ensues.) Seriously.
David: (Stands up and speaks more loudly) Sorry, I wa- I was just saying to my friend that I thought you were the most beautiful woman that I'd ever seen in my- in my life. And then he said that- you said you thought
Roy: Now if you just pay me my three hundred dollars, I'll be on my way!
Rachel: No, that's ok, let's me just get my check book!
Chandler: Alright! Just follow my lead!
Ronni: Oh no, not you, big Joey. Oh my God, you're so much cuter than your pictures! (Joey stares at her) I-I'm, I'm Ronni....Cheese Nip?
Phoebe: That’s right, I've prepared a song for Emma. From my heart to hers. For there’s no greater gift, than the gift of music. (she starts singing) Emma! Your name poses a dilemma. 'Cause not much else rhymes with Emma! Maybe the actor Richard Crenna, he played the commanding officer in Rambo. Happy birthday Emma!
Chandler: Oh my God! (He and Monica walk away.)
Phoebe: Ooh, if you take the northern route there's a man in Illinois with a beard of bees. {Okay, I must protest this, I've lived in Illinois all my life and know of no man with a beard of bees! Wisconsin, on the other hand, might be a different story.}
David: Yeah, Rachel, Chandler, and Ross had to try to get a couch up a staira very narrow New York stairwell and that was probably I-I think it was the hardest Ive-Ive laughed in my life period.
Joey: No, no, no! My talents as an actor!
Matress King: (on TV) Despair fills the mattress showroom. My kingdom is suddenly without a queen. Im so depressed Im going to slash... my prices!! Check it out! Four ninety-nine for a pillow top queen set! Im going medieval on prices!
Monica: Oh my God! That's wild!
Mike (to the charity guy): Oh my God, I love your shirt!
Joey: (to himself) Man, this is a long drive! Are my eyes open? No! (He opens his eyes and sees a hitchhiker.)
Ross: Well, then who was on my bed?
Chandler: I'm pretty sure I put her on my bed.
Ross: OH MY GOD!
Ross: No, she was definitely on my bed.
Ross: You were my first kiss with Rachel?
Monica: You were my first kiss ever?
Chandler: (notices something) Oh my God, the air purifier! Ross's air purifier! All I heard through 4 years of college was (makes a humming noise.)
Joey: She said she wants to slather my body with stuff and then lick it off. I'm not even sure what slathering is, but I definitely want to be a part of it.
Rachel: Oh, I forgot this was in here. Umm, this was the uh garter that I was saving for my wedding and I wanted it to be Monicas something borrowed and its blue. (Starts to cry again.) Yeah
Mike: Is that why your hand is pressed against my crotch?
Joey: (abashed) A place to entertain my lady friends.
Rachel: O-oh my God!
Rachel: Yeah, I know. I had the greatest day though, I got to sit in on the meeting with the reps from Calvin Klien. I told my boss I liked this line of lingerie, she ordered a ton of it. How was your day?
The Librarian: Well, yes! Just give me five minutes, I just have to find someone to cover my shift.
Phoebe: Oh, happy my wedding day to you!
RACHEL: Oh, please, Monica. You've always hated my lamp, and then, all of a sudden, it's just magically broken?
Monica: Oh thanks. (Reading the bill) Champagne, strawberries Oh my God! I cant believe Chandler ordered porn on our wedding night!
Mr. Waltham: Sorry old boy, sorry. Sorry. Sorry. (Them all walk away. As he leaves he mutters to Jack.) I could kill you with my thumb, you know.
Phoebe: (goes back in) I'm Rachel. It's so annoying when I put Emma on the phone to talk with my friends.
Phoebe: Oh my God, what's it doing here?
Joey: (To Henrietta) My friend Rachel has a kid. I totally know nursery rhymes! (makes a thumbs up sign)
Rachel: Well, in my defense, you were not supposed to tell each other.
Mike: Hey, I forgot my scarf.
Phoebe: Uhuh, uhuh... Oh my God! This is really happening.
Phoebe: What harpist? My friend Marjorie is playing the steel drums.
Ross: Wha...? Oh sure, now they lock it, but when they're having sex on the couch, its like: "Come on in, my butt is surprisingly hairy".
Phoebe: I don't care... I'll be my something blue.
Joey: Oh thanks. Thanks. It was great meetin ya. And listen if any of my friends gets married, or have a birthday, or a Tuesday
Phoebe: I know, it's tough. You know what the first thing I did after my mother's funeral was?
Ross: Oh my God.
Joey: What are you talkin about? I never left you! Youve always been my agent!
Rachel: Oh my god Chandler! If you can't handle this, what are you going to be like in the hospital? With the blood and the screaming and the little present that's shooting out of her!?
Rachel: Ok I gotta tell ya, it's really weird when you use my whole name.
Rachel: What do you mean? You've been in my room before!
Phoebe: Okay, my turn. My turn. (Joey hands her to Phoebe.) Oh! Youre so cute! Oh, I could squeeze your little head! (Pause) I wont.
Monica: (on machine) "Hi, uh, Richard it's Monica, um, listen I did something kind of crazy tonight, um, maybe I'm getting my period or something, I don't know." Nooo!!
Monica: Okay, the reason why I asked you guys out to brunch today is because I have been doing some thinking about who should be my maid of honor.
Joey: What!? But I already bought my ticket to Bermuda!
Chandler: (banging on the bottle again) Okay, okay, a little announcement, I just want everyone to know that the position of my best man is still open! And uh, (to the stripper) so is the position of the bride.
Charlie: Oh my God, this is so cool!
Phoebe: Oh that's my grandma. (Joey holds the box away from him.) And thanks Joey she's having a really great time. (Joey is happy now.)
Phoebe: I dont know. I dont know. I cant lie to him again. Oh no Ino! Im just gonna press my breasts up against him.