words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Monica, and Rachel are sitting around the kitchen table as Ross enters.]
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Hey uh Mon, I saw the Porsche parked out front, can I get the keys? Thought Id take that bad boy out for a little spin.
Rachel: Wait a minute! (To Monica) You let Ross drive the Porsche and when I ask you, you say youre the only one whos allowed to drive it.
Ross: Its a car Monica! Not a rocket ship!
Monica: Whatever Ross! Just replace the bulbs in the brake lights after youre done.
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Look Rach if-if you want to go for a ride in the Porsche Ill be glad to take you for a quick spin around the block.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is there as Ross enters with his all his hair sticking straight up.]
Ross: Whew! That was a brisk ride!
Ross: Only way to fly.
Rachel: Come on Ross give me the keys! Monica does not know what shes talking about! I am an excellent driver!
Ross: Youre fast and irresponsible. That adds up to a bad driver.
(A woman walks by and smiles at Rosss hair.)
Ross: Did you see the look that girl just gave me? Huh? She mustve seen me cruising in the bad boy.
Rachel: I think shes checking out your beehive Ross.
Ross: What?! (Checks his hair.) Give-give me a brush.
Ross: No way!
Ross: Fine! Yknow what? It doesnt matter, because, if I remember correctly, there is a comb on the floor of the bathroom.
(Suddenly from out of nowhere Ross dives onto the hood.)
Ross: What do you think youre doing?!
Rachel: Just washing the windshield. (She turns on the wipers forcing Ross off of the hood.)
Ross: There is no way I am letting you drive this car! So why dont you just hand over the keys?
Ross: No ah-ah-ah! Do not start this car! (She starts the car.) Okay! Okay! I will give you twenty bucks if you get out of this car right now! (He looks for the twenty Rachel stole and doesnt find it.)
Rachel: Look Ross, if youre so freaked out, just get in the car!
Ross: With you?! Yeah right!
Ross: (grabbing the car) Okay! Okay! Okay! (He gets in, but into the back seat.)
Ross: In the death seat?!!
[Scene: The Porsche, Rachel is driving along a highway and Ross has finally moved to the death seat and is terrified.]
Ross: (shocked) You dont have a valid drivers licenseOkay that is it! Pull over right now!
Rachel: Oh Ross youre so tense! You just gotta relax okay? Just need to relax all right? Just need to relax (She takes her hands off of the wheel.)
Ross: (grabbing the wheel) What-what are you doing?! Are youOkay thats not funny! Just stop horsing around!
Ross: Okay, stay calm. Nothing is going to happen to you, you are not in that much trouble.
Ross: I was talking to myself! Youre going down!
Ross: Yeah, Ill get right on that.
Rachel: Oh come on Ross!! (She tries to switch places with him and goes under his leg.)
Ross: No Rach! Come on! No-no! Yeah, Im sure we wont get arrested for this.
Ross: Oh my God.
Ross: Dear Lord!!
Ross: Here it comes.
Ross: Well she should, it was taken ten years ago!
Ross: I can handle the stick!!
[Scene: The Porsche, cars are whizzing by and honking their horns on both sides very quickly as Ross creeps along.]
Ross: Who?
Ross: What?! What does he want?! I wasnt doing anything!
Ross: Maybe its uh Sergeant Sagittarius coming back to flirt some more! (They pull over.)
Ross: Good evening officer.
Ross: Ah no. I dont, but it could not have been more than sixty.
Ross: I mean youre not gonna give me a-a ticket for driving too slow are ya?
(Theres a pause as Ross gets suddenly flirtatious.)
Ross: Yknow of-officer I uh I had the weirdest dream last night
Ross: (laughs) You dont-you dont want to hear about my dream Officer Pretty?
Policeman: Its Petty. (He grabs Rosss license.) Ill be right back with your ticket. (Walks back to his car.)
Ross: I know. I know.
Amy turns around to Phoebe: Emma, Ross wants you.
Ross: Thats it. Thats it.
Amy turns to Ross and Rachel: Why does she keep making that noise?
Ross: The nurse said theyre bringing in another woman.
Ross: (on tape) I know. Hey remember remember the night they got engaged? How uh, you and I almost
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Chandler and Monica are holding the twins. Joey and Phoebe are sitting by the window, while Ross and Rachel are standing together. The apartment is completely empty. Two men are carrying a large dresser.]
[Scene: Rosss apartment, he and Emily are addressing their invitations.]
ROSS: [looking at a glass table with a panther shaped base] Look, check this out. Is it a coffee table, is it a panther? There's no need to decide.
Ross: No, I-I thought it would be more fun this way.
Ross: Uh Rach
Ross: (in a high pitched voice) Monica!
Ross: (To Rachel) Squeeze your legs together and cover the babys ears!
Ross: And yet somehow its true!
(Ross shrugs his shoulders to Rachel and Sick Bastard closes the screen all the way.)
Ross: (softly) Really?
Ross: Oh there you go!
Ross: (running up) Hey! Sorry I kept you waiting so long.
Ross: No-no. We
Ross: Sid you lucky deaf bastard.
Ross: Hey!
[Ross looks at Joey coyly.]
MIKE: I'll get it.� (He lunges across Ross's lap on the sofa to reach the phone.� Ross stares at him with wide eyes.)� Hello?� Ross's place.� Mike speaking.� (pause.� Hands phone to Ross)� It's for you.
Joey: Hey, dont get religious on me, ok. (Ross looks a little confused.) A guy in your position needs to be a little better at relaxing. You know. Why do you think we have the comfortable chairs? Huh...come here sit down. (Ross sits down.) Ready? (Joey flips the foot rest up.) Ahh!! (He reclines the chair fully.) Ohh, yeah!! Huh?!
Ross: He does not look happy.
Ross: It was the chair again! Okay? Im not doing it! It whatlook, I dontyknow whateh-eh (He walks away and goes over to Mona.) Hi.
Ross: What? Of course you can! Hop on!
Ross: Yeah, you didnt expect her to live there with a baby did you?
Chandler: Man, if only youd gotten here sooner. (Ross turns and glares at him.)
Ross: What is that?
Ross: Go!
Joey: Hey and look he brought flowers. Thanks Ross, but Im really more of a candy guy. (Laughs.)
Ross: Sweetie youre doing great.
Chandler: And I think Ross is generous too.
Ross: Yes you can!
Ross: Uh actually, I sent the flowers before the actual date. So techincally, technically I didnt break any rules. Thanks for stopping by though.
Ross: Oh shes shes perfect.
Ross: Oh! Oh my God oh! Oh my God shes here.
Ross: Oh, come in.
(Everyone except Ross and Rachel leave.)
Ross: No, no, really. You should go. Just go! Go! Go out! Really, the world is your oyster. Kick up the heels. Paint the town red. (Slang right?)
Joey: What was the other one Ross?
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are trying the home remedies again.]
Ross: Oh! No-n-
Ross: True, but youre allowed to be unreasonable. Youre having our baby.
Ross: (entering) Hey Janice!
Ross: Okay.
Ross: Huh?
Ross: No-no. No.
Ross: Man! Did you see the kid on that nose?
Ross: Look at Emma!
Ross: Yeah. Shes putting her down now, thats her. (Points to the nurse putting Emma now.)
ROSS: I've no idea, could be. Listen, I'm sorry I had to work tonight. RACHEL: Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight. [they kiss] ROSS: You're not laughing. RACHEL: This time it's not so funny. [They kiss and start undressing. As Rachel tries to pull off Ross's tie she catches it in his mouth. Then they roll across the fur rug.] RACHEL: Ah, oh God. Oh, honey, oh that's OK. ROSS: What. Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box. RACHEL: Oh, thank God. [Scene: Museum of Natural History. The next morning Rachel and Ross are sleeping in the display under a fur.] ROSS: Hi. RACHEL: Hi you. I can't believe I'm waking up next to you. ROSS: I know it is pretty unbelievaaaaah. RACHEL: What? ROSS: We're not alone. [A church youth group is outside the display watching them] CLOSING CREDITS [Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They are still in their chairs, watching Beavis and Butthead.] [they're laughing along with the show when an alarm goes off] JOEY: Is that the fire alarm? CHANDLER: Yeah. [feels the floor] Oh it's not warm yet, we still have time. JOEY: Cool.
Ross: Its its complicated okay?
Ross: Yeah, exactly.
Ross: Yeah! I dont know. I mean, last year Elizabeth now-now this kid. What-what-what-what is it?! Am I giving out some kind of sexy professor vibe? (Rachel and Joey both look at him.)
Joey: What are you talking about alone? What about Ross?
Ross: Uh Joey, can you give us just a minute?
Ross: Hey Joey. (To Rachel) Hey you.
Ross: What?
Ross: Hey, wheres uh, wheres mom?
Ross: What about Ben?
Ross: No, come on dont start. (they start kissing again) Ouch!
Ross: Yeah right.
Ross: Can I get some of that action?
Chandler: Does Ross know?
[Scene: The Anniversary Party, Ross and Rachel are arriving and see his parents.]
Mr Zelner: (looks at Ross, for a long moment, confused) I meant with my son.
(Rachel looks at Ross and gets his approval.)
Phoebe: Especially Ross!
Rachel: Really?! Even Ross?
(Ross turns to look at Joey.)
Ross: No!
Ross: Aww that is so cool.
Ross: Dad, what are you doing?
[Cut to the hallway outside the room, Ross is going to see which table hes at and sees a beautiful woman doing the same thing.]
Ross: Hi!
Ross: What?
Ross starts playing with a plate: Woah. Woah... <nearly really drops the plate and more seriously> Woah.
Ross: No!
Ross: Yes!
Ross: No!
Ross: No!!
Ross: Its mine.
Ross: Well we haven't offically asked them yet, but we would want Monica and Chandler.
Ross: And-and I, and I saw that Joey was about to go in, so I ran in ahead of him to-to surprise him and, and then I pretended I didnt know he was in there. (They all kinda look at him.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Gunther is behind the counter as Ross enters looking for Chandler.]
Ross: No!! No!! I wanna stay. I wanna talk about this.
Chandler: Go and tell Rachel right now before Ross finds out.
Ross: Hey.
Ross: I dont think you do.
[Scene: Rachels Room, Ross is entering.]
Ross: Joey proposed to you?
Ross: Then what did happen?
Ross: What?!
[Scene: The church where Ross and Emily are to be married. Judy, Andrea, and Monica enter together.]
Ross: No, you didnt!
Ross: What happened to the Disgustingtons?
Ross: What?
Ross: Good weird?
Ross: So, did he get on one knee, did he have a speech prepared, or (in a tender way) did he cry? (the guys look at him) Yeah, big surprise, I like proposals!