words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is on the phone with her mother. Phoebe, Rachel, and Ross are there.]
Ross: And officiating at tonight's blackout, is Rabbi Tribbiani.
Ross: That's my sister.
Ross: Pheebs, what about you?
Rachel: Um... Ross?
Ross: Disneyland, 1989, 'It's a Small World After All.'
Ross: The ride broke down. So, Carol and I went behind a couple of those mechanical Dutch children... then they fixed the ride, and we were asked never to return to the Magic Kingdom.
Ross: Step back.
[Time lapse, Ross and Rachel are talking, Joey is on the couch, and Monica and Phoebe are out of the room.]
Ross: Well, it was the only thing to do there that didn't have a line.
Ross: Come on.
Ross: (sarcastically) And you didn't marry him because...?
Ross: Probably. But you know, I'll tell you something. Passion is way overrated.
Ross: It is. Eventually, it kind of... burns out. But hopefully, what you're left with is trust, and security, and... well, in the case of my ex-wife, lesbianism. So, you know, for all of those people who miss out on that passion... thing, there's all that other good stuff.
Ross: But, um... I don't think that's going to be you.
Ross: Uh-uh. See, I see.... big passion in your future.
Ross: Mmmm.
Ross: I do.
Rachel: Oh Ross, you're so great. (she playfully rubs his head and gets up)
(Ross gets up, pleased with himself.)
Ross: (innocently) What?
Ross: (acts surprised) What? (pause) Why not?
Ross: No, no, no. I'm not in the zone.
Joey: Ross, you're mayor of the zone.
Ross: I'm taking my time, alright? I'm laying the groundwork. Yeah. I mean, every day I get just a little bit closer to...
Joey: Priesthood! Look Ross, I'm telling you, she has no idea what you're thinking. If you don't ask her out soon you're going to end up stuck in the zone forever.
Ross: I will, I will. See, I'm waiting for the right moment. (Joey looks at him) What? What, now?
Ross: Shhhh!
Ross: We're shushing... because... we're trying to hear something. Listen. (everyone is silent) Don't you hear that?
Ross: See?
Ross: (to Joey) OK, here goes.
Ross: I'm going to do it.
Ross: You come out there, you're a dead man.
Ross: Thanks. (Joey hugs him) OK.
Joey: OK. (Ross goes out on the balcony to talk to Rachel)
Joey: OK, you've got to promise that you'll never, ever tell Ross that I told you.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's Balcony, Ross and Rachel are talking.]
Ross: OK, I have a question. Well, actually, it's not so much a question as.. more of a general wondering... ment.
Ross: OK. Here goes. For a while now, I've been wanting to, um....
Rachel: Ohhh!!!! (looking at something behind Ross)
Ross: Yes, yes, that's right...
Rachel: Oh, look at the little cat! (a small kitten is on the roof behind Ross)
Ross: What? (the cat jumps on his shoulders) Ow!
[Cut to inside. Monica, Joey and Phoebe are singing while outside, Ross and Rachel are trying to get the cat off of Ross' shoulder.]
Monica: (to Ross) This is just Bactine. It won't hurt.
(Ross flinches in pain.)
Ross: Why don't we just put 'poor little Tooty' out in the hall?
Ross: (nonchalantly) Yeah?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross, Monica, and Joey are playing Monopoly.]
Ross: (rolling) Lucky sixes....
Rachel: And Ross.
Ross: (jealous) So, um... where did Paolo come from?
Ross: No, I mean tonight, in the building. Suddenly. Into our lives.
Ross: That, that is funny... (to Joey).... and Rachel keeps touching him.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Paolo are at the window. Ross and Joey are watching disgustedly.]
Ross: (mocking Paolo) Blah blah blah, blah blah blah... blah blaaaaaah....
Ross: Wha-What did he say that was so funny?
Ross: That's... that's classic.
(Ross looks at Joey.)
[Cut to the other side of the apartment, Ross has gone over to straighten things out with Paolo.]
Ross: Paolo. Hi.
Paolo: Ross!
(Ross notices that Paolo is standing on a step, which makes him taller. Ross gets up on the same step so he can look down at Paolo.)
Ross: Listen. Um, listen. Something you should... know... um, Rachel and I... we're kind of a thing.
Ross: Thing, yes. Thing.
Ross: No, no, no. Technically the... sex is not... being had, but that's... see, that's not the point. See, um, the point is that... Rachel and I should be, er, together. You know, and if you get in the.... um...
Ross: No, no, that's not where I was going. Er, if you get in the... way, of us becoming a thing, then I would be, well, very sad.
Ross: Yeah! Se vice?
Ross: So you do know a little English.
Ross: Do you know the word crapweasel?
Ross: That's funny, because you know, you are a huge crapweasel!
Ross: Thank you.
Ross: Kinda... spooky without any lights.
Ross: OK, guys, guys? I have the definitive one. Mwwwooooo-hah-hah...
(The lights come back on, and Rachel and Paolo are making out. Ross clutches his chest.)
Ross: Oh.. oh... oh.
Joey: Hey Ross. This probably isn't the best time to bring it up, but you have to throw a party for Monica.
Ross: Oh-oh, guess what? I-I have a date with Elizabeth (Talking into Chandler's ear.) Hornswoggle.
[cut to a montage of scenes involving Bonnie, Ross, and Rachel from the last episode.]
Ross: Okay.
Ross: Thats right good things, that-that is what I said. (glances at Monica)
Ross: Well, I don't know what else to do. I mean, I either keep my wife and lose one of my-my-my best friends or I keep my friend and get divorced the second time before I'm 30! So-so if anyone has-has a better suggestion, let's hear it! 'Cause I-I got nothing! All right, don't be shy, any suggestion will do. (There are none.) Okay then. Here we go. Magic 8 Ball, should I never see Rachel again? (He turns it over and reads the answer) Ask again later. Later is not good enough. (He shakes it up again and reads the answer.) Ask again later. What the hell! This is broken! It-it is broken!
Ross: Oh.
Ross: Well, hes finally alseep. About that ah, bump on his head?
Ross: Hey! (Rachel is shocked) Hi Bonnie!
Ross: (looking at ticket) Yep! Yeah, see this says D-13, and uh
Chandler: Okay, well Im gonna get Ross, get the cameras, and get them developed. (Joey laughs again.) 32 Joe. Youre 32! (Exits)
Ross: Good morning.
Ross: Oh hey, dont thank me, thank yourself. Youre the one who faced her fears and ultimately overcame them.
Ross: Nah ah! Nah ah! (stops him form doing so) No no no! No ad-libbing and dude, you can't touch the paintings.
Ross: Hi.
Chandler: Yknow that thing that Ross was gonna do at our wedding?! He was hanging out with me yesterday and he turned to me and said, "Youre half Scottish right?"
Ross: Im sorry Im late, did I miss anything?
Ross: You still love me?
Ross: What?
Ross: What?!
(Ross starts stuffing pinecones in the suitcase. As the receptionist walks in, Chandler makes a bird's verse and Ross stops)
(Cut to Ross and Rachel, talking next to one of the tables.)
ROSS: Hi Tushie.
Joey: Well, no, not exactly! All right, look, I, I wasn't trying to save Ross. Okay? My sandwich was next to Ross. All right? I was, I was trying to save my sandwich.
Ross: Just some boys gave me their phone numbers.
Ross: Chandlers gone again!
Ross: Um, you know, just out of curiosity...
Ross: Good night.
Ross: Yeah.
Rachel: Aaah... Ross, actually there's something that I really need to talk to you about.
Ross: Pa-haa!! I would love to go with you.
Ross: (He does so, and finds a half-eaten box of cookies.) Youre good. (Tries a cookie.) These are not.
Ross: (surprised) Hi!
Ross: I know.
Ross and Chandler: Its my joke.
Ross: OK, I'm gonna go say goodbye to the guys.
Chandler: (to Rachel) And you Ross, I believe, if you check Rachels bag you will find a half-eaten box of cookies in there.
Ross: Okay.
Ross: Yeah? All right I'll call the airlines. (Picks up the phone and does so)
Ross: Yeah, yeah. (opens the door) It wasnt every morning.
Rachel: When?! After the birth of our first secret child?! (To All) Ross didnt get the annulment; we are still married.
Ross: Yes. Yes. Yes. (Theyre perfect so far.)
Ross: I think I have an old band uniform from high school.
Ross: Yknow what? I dont like you without mom. (To Joey) Come on. (Walks away.)
Ross: Oh, and also, hes, hes walkin kind of funny, his left leg is moving a lot faster than his right leg, and hes in there just sort of y'know... (walks around in a circle)
Ross: Its over.
ROSS: Well, I was going to, but after I talked to you, I talked to Joey.
Chandler: (coming up under center, just like a real quarterback does, and puts his hands between Rosss legs.) Twenty-three!! Seventy-four!! (Ross stands up and looks at him) You wanna go shotgun?
Ross: Im sorry.
Ross: Done!
Ross: Oh, sure! Im sure.
Ross: Hey, what have you guys been up to?
Ross: I told Emily to come. And I just need to y'know, talk to Rachel about it.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Ross are there as Mona enters.]
Ross: Awww.
Monica: Boy, I know they say you can't change your parents,... boy, if you could- (To Ross) -I'd want yours.
Ross: Nothing, ah there was this thing at the museum. Come on. (they go into her apartment) Easy.
Ross: Hey!
Ross: What happened?
Ross: Ooh, hey Ben, what if the Holiday Armadillo told you all about the Festival of Lights?
Ross: (angrily) Whos your roommate?
Ross: Im sorry I had to take such drastic measures to make my point, but Ilook, I just want you guys to be safe. (Monica comes out to throw out the garbage and Ross screams ) DANGER!!!!! (She completely ignores him and keeps walking.) Ahhh, huh? Unagi.
[Scene: The hallway between the apartments, Ross is bringing Sarah to Joey and Chandlers.]
Ross: What are you doing? Are you trying to hurt me? Or something?
Ross: Ok, no, no, you hang up. You, you, y(Rachel grabs the phone and hangs it up for him.)
Paul: Okay. Ill give you one chance to change my mind. (Ross laughs in relief) You got one minute. (Ross suddenly gets worried.)
Ross and Rachel: Come on!
Ross: What happened? Joey?
Ross: (in ecstasy) Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh .
Phoebe: (To Ross) For what it's worth, we would have caught her if we were at the right airport.
Ross: Thats correct. Ladies?
Ross: Ross has the blender! Ugh, everything's just falling apart!
Ross: Oh, hey y'know, they-they really overcharge you for that stuff. (Rachel glares at him.) But who cares?! Because it's all on me! (Rachel reaches into the fridge and pulls out two handfuls of those mini booze bottles.) (Watching her.) That is, one big drink!
Ross: That is correct.
Ross: I missed you too.
Ross: Because I folded it up and put in my pants pocket. Do you...do you not look there?
[Mrs. Geller and Ross both enter]
Ross: Thats cause-cause youre moms dog kept-kept looking at me.
Ross: Uh, Rach, do you want me to shuffle those?
ROSS: I think we proved our point.
Ross: I fell asleep!
Ross: Are you sure? Great. Carol? Wanna come over and join us?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Ross, and Rachel are there.]
ROSS: (entering from Rachel's bedroom) Come on out, honey! I'm telling you look good! (turns around, and under his breath, to the rest of the guys) Tell her she looks good, tell her she looks good.
Ross: Whos Chip?
Ross: Im kinda beat.
Joey: That's what this is about! Oh my God, you hate Ross!
Ross: Okay, you dont have to stop, Im invisible, Im not here. (lights a candle)
Ross: What the hell happened on that beach?!
Ross: Well ah, actually...
Ross: Oh, Im sure.
Ross: Why? Did you write it?
Joey: (To Ross) Congratulations! You just got married!
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Im reading your ad.
Ross: Whoa, hey! What are doing? Trying to get me drunk?
ROSS: Thank you Gunther. We didn't want to have to go and do that.
Ross: Good, so do I
Ross: Funny, my birthday was seven months ago.
Ross: (sets out a bunch of shot glasses and starts to poor himself a drink, many drinks) Im an idiot. I mean shoulda seen it, I mean Carol and Id be out and shed, shed see some beautiful woman, and, and shed be Ross y'know look at her, and Id think, God, my wife is cool!
Ross: Ohhhhh!