words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers new apartment, Ross and Chandler are there.]
Ross: So, I just finished this fascinating book. By the year 2030, there'll be computers that can carry out the same amount of functions as an actual human brain. So theoretically you could download your thoughts and memories into this computer and-and-and live forever as a machine.
Ross and Chandler: Hey!
Chandler: Yes, and while I'm doing that, Ross has a great computer story for you.
Ross: Hi! (Rushes over to shake her hand instantly.)
Ross: So uh, wha-uh, what do you do?
Ross: Thank you for bringing her into our lives.
Ross: Yeah, yeah man don't do it. I mean if you date her, then-then-then I can't date her.
[Scene, Central Perk: Rachel, Ross and Monica are there]
Ross: Monica had such a crush on him. Yeah, she used to kiss his poster every night before she went to bed.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Hey!
Ross: (enters) Wow, couples who live together do start to look alike. So, Mondler...uh, what uh, what cha doin?
Ross: Did you get Monica's authorization to move all of her stuff?
Ross: Put it back exactly where you found it?
Chandler: Yes I'm gonna put it back (Mocking Ross) exactly where I found it.
Ross: Kay, first of all, this attitude is not helping.
Ross: Whoa, hello, did you just meet Monica?
Ross: Hmm -you know, actually this'll work out well. Cause when you have to move back in with Joey, Joey's hot new roommate can come and live with me.
Ross: Look Chandler, Monica is really weird about this kind stuff all right. Believe me, I lived with her for 16 years. She is going to freak out. Oh my God, she's going to sit on you.
Monica: Well, are you just hanging out with Ross?
Chandler: It's, all good! Okay bye-bye Mon! (To Ross) She's-she's gonna kill me.
Ross: Yeah, the phone was facing the other way. (Chandler fixes it and a picture frame off the table.) And that goes back up there.
Chandler: We should start with the big stuff. Yknow? That'll be the easiest. Uh, let's start with the couch. (He picks up one end and Ross doesn't help) I got it. (He moves it back to where he thinks it goes.)
Ross: Yeah that-that, doesn't look right.
Ross: Whoa, whoa, but then the back of the couch won't line up with he back of the carpet.
Ross: Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, but then the coffee table won't be centered in the seating area.
Ross: Hey, I've been married 3 times
Ross: Look, we do not repel women OK? That is completely untrue.
Ross: Yeah, well what about you? You weren't you know, so hot in college either. After everything he said, he'd go "ba dum bum chessh"
Ross: Oh y'know what, girls don't like it when I start talking about science.
Ross: Uh, they don't like it when you correct their grammar.
Ross: They don't like it when you keep asking them if they like you.
Ross: (nonchalantly) I'm never gonna find love again.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Chandler has the tape measure out and is busy lining up the lamp on the kitchen counter, Ross is supervising the whole operation.]
Ross: Who cares? I repel women.
Ross: (whispers) What?!
Chandler: (to Ross) I couldn't say that I was naked because she's allowed too see me naked.
Ross: Why does anyone have to be naked?
Monica: Why is Ross naked?
Ross: I-I had to show Chandler something?
Ross: Yeah-yeah I uh, I have a uh, a guy problem.
Ross: Dude, what'd you have?
Ross: (realizes something) The photo album! There were millions of pictures of the apartment in the photo album. We just go through it and match everything to the pictures.
Ross: So really, what'd ya have?
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Chandler and Ross are there. Monica enters]
Ross: Bye! (Runs out)
Monica: All right, hold on okay? First thing's first. (Gets her cleaning gloves on) Okay, now did Ross sit anywhere while he was naked?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Janine and Chandler are there]
Ross: So it said that by the year 2030, there'll be computers that can carry out the same number of functions as an actual human brain. So theoretically we could download our thoughts and our memories into this computer...
Ross: That's so Janine, you-you-you know what, do you know we're doing right now? You and I, we're interfacing.
Ross: Thats, thats, thats a big candy bar. (Shes holding one of those huge Toblerone bars.) I had the most amazing time with you.
Ross: You called Animal Control?
Ross: Can't do it, can you?
Ross: I know.
Ross: Well, start looking.
Rachel: Ross, you're like my best friend.
Ross: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What makes you think we're gonna break up?
Ross: Oh, hey, hey, I got that.
Ross: No, no, they will. I just... uh...
Ross: Yeah.
Ross and Julie: Can't wait.
Ross: Monica bang! Monica bang! (runs into one of the posts) Ow!
Ross: Okay, okay, I was typing names into the library computer earlier, yknow-yknow for fun, and I typed mine in and guess what came up? My doctoral dissertation! Its here! Yeah, its right-its right down here! In the biggest library in the university! (They start heading that way, towards a secluded section behind the racks.)
Ross: (seeing her) Rach!
Ross: Oh Rach thats great. Thats great. (They hug and Joey breathes a sigh of relief.)
Ross: Even if the sidecar had a windscreen so your hair wouldnt get messed up?
Ross: I'm just so happy you guys are finally getting a kid.
Ross: What?! Hello! We didnt get married.
Ross: Everyone, this is Julie.
Chandler: Ross, I am not gonna run away again! I just want to get a little fresh air.
Ross: The screaming guy?
Ross: 200 at least.
Ross: You gotta hear this story.
Ross: And bus.
[Scene: An Emergency Room, Chandler and Joey are leading Ross in.]
Ross: Hey, Rach, can I get some coffee?
Ross: Thank you.
Monica: Uh, so, uh, Rach, uh... do you wanna save this wrapping paper, I mean, it's only a little bit torn... so are you gonna go for it with Ross or should I just throw it out?
Ross: I'm going to China.
Ross: But...
Ross: It was you, pal.
Rachel: (To Ross) Here's your lemonade.
[A montage of scenes from The One Where Ross and Rachel Take A Break follows.]
Joey: (To Ross in the kitchen) All right, it's another commercial; I still haven't told her!
Ross: (stopping her from falling) Okay, okay. Look, you have got to go to a doctor! Okay?
Ross: Oh, I know. (Laughs) Yknow, just-just talking about it is getting me kinda
Ross: (to Joey) So? What do you think? (Shows himself - Joey observes him with a strange look on his face.)
Ross: You're bleeding.
Ross: (to Rachel) So, uh, he's back.
Chandler: (Tapping Ross on his shoulder) So, you feel like a dad yet?
Monica: Yknow, it is so strange seeing Ross here this time of day, cause usually hes got the childrens hospital.
Joey: You gotta tell Ross how you feel.
Ross: What?
ROSS: I just wanna read something. It's your pro list.
Ross: What?
Ross: (entering) Hey! I just heard. What's up?
Phoebe: (to Chandler and Ross) Thank you.
Ross: (walks up) Wow Monica! Hey, just so you know I had my uh, older brother chat with Chandler.
Ross: I didn't order lemonade.
Ross: Oh wow, yeah! See, I did not get that.
Rachel: Okay, what? What is too sensitive? (There's music coming from the living room. Ross opens the door to the living room and he and Rachel see Sandy play a song for Emma on his recorder. Rachel is moved by this, but Ross only sees his point proven again, and walks back into the kitchen, angrily. The door he was holding, swings back and hits Rachel.)
Ross: Okay. Okay. (They hug.) Okay.
Ross: Y'know how-how the nurse said that-that Nana had passed? Well, she's not, quite..
Ross: It's been sixteen years but the air quotes still hurt.
Ross: All right here. Watch me execute the three Ps of championship play. Power. (swings the racquet) Precision. (swings the racquet.) and penache. (does a backswing and hits Sarah whos started up the stairs, knocking her down, they both watch in horror.)
Ross: Carol?
Ross: (following them into the kitchen) What are you guys doing?
Ross: Hi. Sorry we're late but we werewell, there was touching.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is getting Mona some coffee.]
Ross: Hello to the rest.
Ross: (enters) Hi, honey.
Ross: (Looking at the posters.) Wow, cool poster. Or should I say groovy poster? (They sit down on the couch. Ross smiles and the black light fluoresces his teeth.) So, ahh, where were we?
Ross: How's the hair?
Ross: Long story, honey.
Ross: What difference does that make?!
Monica: Ross let me ask you a question. All jokes aside, where is this relationship going?
Ross: Hey! (congratulates him)
(Ross and Chandler turn at the voice...)
Ross: Carol, we've been through this before, ok? We have a good time. We laugh, we play. It's like we're father and son.
Ross: No!
Ross: (overhearing) What kind of research?
Ross: It's breast milk.
Ross: Oh, I'm threatened by you?
Carol and Susan: Hey! (This wakes Chandler and Ross up)
Ross: Oh, you've tasted it.
Ross: Helen Geller? I don't think so.
Monica: Ross, he's got the remote again.
(They both laugh as Ross heads back to the bathroom.)
(Ross goes over to the counter. Chandler follows him.)
Ross: Oh, all right. (Joey flips the coin.) Tails! (The coin bounces off of the landing above them and falls to the ground.) Can you-can you see what it is?
Ross: No. No, I didnt. I didnt want to be that guy.
Ross: Yeah I know; hes in Bens class.
Rachel: (she reaches for the bottle) Oww! (She grabs the bottle, but has trouble opening it. She pops the top off and aspirins fly all over the place as Ross enters.)
Ross: I got it! Hey, you get to sleep with her, I get the cramps.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is there as Jill enters to start her date with Ross.]
Ross: Well, yeah. I cant-I cant stay here all night, and if I go in there shes-shes gonna wanna... do stuff.
Ross: Rachel, Ive seen you naked a million times. I ate hot fudge off you naked. Remember, I-I sucked that mini-marshmallow out of your belly button?
[Scene: Ross's apartment. Ross is holding Ben.]
ROSS: We'll give you Janice.
ROSS: [smells Ben's butt] No no, you're fine, you're fine.
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, theyre returning from the party.]
Rachel: Ross is coming over. I think now would be a really good time to talk to him.
ROSS: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What, you don't, uh, you don't believe in evolution?
ROSS: You don't believe in evolution?
ROSS: Hi.
ROSS: Well, there you go.
ROSS: Oh you guys are not gonna believe what happened.
[Scene: Elizabeth Hornswoggle's apartment; Ross is there on his date with her. They are sitting on the couch watching a movie. Ross is obviously hot.]
ROSS: Ok, we were sitting over there playing on the floor and he grabs the table and he pulls himself up. He pulled himself up. Standing man. I'm sorry you guys missed it but I did tape it so it you guys want to see it.
Ross: Phoebe, there is no secret. Okay? I didnt propose.