words in movies
Ross: Whyd you say no?
Joey: Remember what happened the last time I did an interview for them? I said I write a lot of my own lines, and then the writers got mad and made my character fall down the elevator shaft. So who knows what I might say this time.
Chandler: If only there was something in your head to control the things you say. (Joey nods his agreement.)
Joey: Fine! All right, Ill do it. But hey! You guys have to be at the next table so you can stop me if I yknow, start to say something stupid.
Joey: Shh, OK, here I come, here I come. See I'm comin' to fix the copier, I can't get to the copier, I'm thinkin' what do I do, what do I do so I just watch 'em have sex. And then I say, wait, here's my line, (Joey from TV) you know that's bad for the paper tray.
Joey: Yeah. I realized it about a half-hour ago but I didn't want to say anything 'cause I didn't want to jinx it.
The Interviewer: Understood. So, whatd you say back then?
Rachel: (scoffs at him) Yeah, thats gonna get you into Soap Opera Digest. Well I (leans into the microphone again) I would just like to say that Joey truly has enriched the days of our lives.
The Interviewer: So it seems like you have a lot of friends, who would you say is your best friend?
Monica: You cant say that!! You-you dont know!! I mean I thought I was gonna pass out from the pain! Anyway I-I tried, but I-I couldnt...bend that way. So... (Looks at Joey.)
Ross: I would say that.
Joey: No Im not. Why would you say that? Thats just mean.
Chandler: Now Ive upset you? What did I say?
(Suddenly Rachel clears her throat and the camera cuts to the rest of the gang staring at them. Needless to say Joey and Ross are shocked and slowly turn their heads to see the gang.)
Joey: Oh-oh-oh-oh, how I do it is, I look a woman up and down and say, "Hey, how you doin?"
PHOEBE: Yes, I was going to incorporate that. Oh good, here's Monica, she'll have something nice to say.
Rachel: (all mushy) Oh, you know what? Let's not say anything else. I love you. (they hug)
Drunk Man: I just want to say that Ross is a wonderful young man.
Chandler: Lets just say if I cant find the right CD case I just put it in the nearest one.
Phoebe: All right, everyone calm down! Everyone calm down! I have something that I would like to say! Who here likes Ross? (Ross is the only one who raises his hand and Phoebe glares at him to put his hand back down.) Of course you don't like him! He-he didn't give you any money, he raised his own hand when I asked, "Who hear likes Ross," and he's wearing two nametags! (He takes one off.) I-I'll be honest with you guys, when I first met Ross I didn't like him at all! But then once I got to know him I saw that he's really sweet and caring and very generous. I mean, all I'm saying is don't judge Ross before you get to know him all right? I mean, I like all you guys now, but when I first meet you y'know Kurt, I thought, y'know abrasive drunk, umm Lola, mind numbingly stupid! And okay, you guys (She turns to an elderly gentleman and a 20 something woman, who're a couple.) (To the girl) Gold-digger, (To the old guy) cradle robbing perv! So, I think you all know what I mean.
Ross: Yeah, kids say all kinds of crap. (In the other room Emma starts to cry.)
Ross: (Looking at the posters.) Wow, cool poster. Or should I say groovy poster? (They sit down on the couch. Ross smiles and the black light fluoresces his teeth.) So, ahh, where were we?
Joey: Well, hey! Well... (he takes his mug to toast Phoebe) Here's to Phoebe, who's found the greatest guy in the world! To Phoebe and... (a bit uncertain) I wanna say Mike? (pause) To Phoebe and Mike!
Ross: Well, we just wanted to say a quick hi, and then we're gonna go see the baby.
Monica: Oh please! Dad turned my room into a gym 20 minutes after I moved out! I gotta say, a tanning bed and a stack of Victorias Secret catalogues, not a gym!
[Time Lapse, the babies are finally asleep. Good for Phoebe! The only problem is, Monicas apartment looks like a tornado, a hurricane, a swarm of locusts, fire, brimstone, hail, and giant man-eating, radioactive ants have torn the place apart. Needless to say, its messy enough to cause Monica to die of shock right away. Parents with small children know what Im talking about.]
Rachel: Whoa-whoa-whoa, lets say more!
Joey: (laughs) Yeah! Right! (points at Monica) People eat birds... Bird meat... Now do they just fly into your mouth or you go to... you go to a restaurant and you say: "Excuse me, I'll have a bucket of fried bird." (laughs again) Or... or maybe just a wing or... (realises...)
Monica: Im getting married!!!! Im gonna be a bride!!!! (Someone else yells at her.) No, I will not shut up because Im engaged! (He yells again.) Ohh, big talk! Huh, why dont you come over here and say that to me?! Huh, buddy?! Yeah, my fiancee will kick your ass! (Chandler starts to look worried.) Come on, apartment 20! Apartment 20!
Ross: Ok, but you know what? I gotta say, I'm really impressed that you were able to memorize all this so quickly!
RACHEL: [on phone] Ross, hi, it's Rachel. I'm just calling to say that um, everything's fine and I'm really happy for you and your cat who, by the way, I think you should name Michael. And, you know, ya see there I'm thinking of names so obviously, I am over you. I am over you and that, my friend, is what they call closure. [hangs up and tosses phone in the ice bucket]
Rachel: Yes! I will! Absolutely! (She takes out his license and her license and holds them face to face with each other. She then proceeds to act like Dark Helmut in Spaceballs, and mimic a conversation between the two of them.) Hello, Rachel. Hi, Joshua. I left my wallet here on purpose. Really? Yes, I just wanted to see you again. Oh, Im glad. Rachel, Id like to say something to you. Yes? How you doin?
Ross: Yes, I do have a laundry room in my building, um, but there's a.... rat problem. Apparently they're attracted to the dryer sheets, and they're goin' in fine, but they're comin' out all.... fluffy. Anyway, say, sevenish?
CHANDLER: Hey man, look it's my best bud. How ya doin? [Joey doesn't respond] Wow, you are really gettin' good at that Marcel Marceau thing. Hey, whaddya say uh, we play some ball, you and me, huh, whaddya say? [Throws a basketball to Joey. Joey doesn't move to catch it and the ball takes out a lamp] OK, that's my bad.
Chandler: You know, guys I got to say. This means so much to me. That you would trust me with your child. I mean, we all know that Monica and I have been trying to have a baby of our own. You know I've had my doubts about my skills as a father, but that you two.. that you two.... <starts to cry>
Singer: Okay, my next songs called: Phoebe Buffay, What Can I Say. I Really Loved When We Were Singing Partners, And I Shouldnt Have Left You That Way.
Monica: I can't believe she's gonna say yes to David. She's clearly in love with Mike.
David: Yeah, I Well I really actually wanted to say umm, that, but um, I figured I probably shouldnt because yknow, I have to leave.
Joshua: So (Holds out his hands as to say, "Where are my gloves?")
Phoebe: Oh, Im flaky. Ill say anything.
Rachel: Dont just say yes! This isnt a game, Joey you can really get hurt out here. Okay, so do you want to pay attention or do you want to die?!
RACHEL: Really? You don't say, because mine was licked on by kittens.
Rachel: Yknow, I never thought Id say this about a movie, but I really hope this dog dies. (Joey brings over a stool at sits on it next to Rachel whos in the big chair.) What are you doing over there? Come sit here, you protect me.
Monica: I know. Lets try a look of far off wonderment. Okay, well-well gaze into our future and well think about our marriage and the days to come. (Chandler is still not getting it.) Chandler! What is the matter with your face?! I mean this picture is supposed to say "Geller and Bing to be married," not "Local woman saves drowning moron!" (The photographer laughs.) Hey! Dont laugh at him! Hes my drowning moron!
Rachel: Okay, um, I...(Phoebe walks into her room.) All right Phoebe look, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry. OK? I handled the situation horribly and I should not have lied to you.
Ross: Look I-I dont know whats going on with you and your husband and what is hopefully an adult dog walker, look can I just say not all men are like that.
Monica: Phoebe is going to say "Yes" to David. See, that's what happens when you meddle in people's lives!
Chandler: No! No, she didn't say that. I-I-I think you should talk to Monica now.
Chandler: And I don't wanna say this, I don't you guys to hate me, but uh, I don't think, I can be around that dog anymore. Okay, so either the dog goes, or I go. (An awkward silence ensues.) Oh my god!!
Chandler: Wish it! (To the woman, Kathy, he likes) Hi. Hi, I-I was just sitting over there, and uhh, Chandler. My name is Chandler. Did I say that?
JOEY: I just... I just don't think that I want it that way though, y'know? I mean, let's say I do make it, alright? I'm always gonna look back and wonder if it was because of my talent or because of.. y'know, the Little General.
Joey: Too long! Oh my God, Rach, I've been dying to talk to someone about this for so long! Listen, listen, we can't say anything about this to anybody, they're so weird about that! Listen (Phoebe returns and interrupts them.)
Chandler: Say, Joe, I had a strange idea of what we could do for our last night. What do you say we play a little uh, foosball for money?
Joey: Alright, alright, hey yknow fair is fair, (he pretends to wash his hands) if youre right, youre right, what can I say, but hey oh no! (He throws water on the guys pants)
Chandler: You know, you should really go on this show. All right, listen, I got three tickets to the Rangers tonight. What'd ya' say?
Chandler: Youre right, and Im sorry! This means a lot to me! I want you to be my friend again! I swear, I wont say another word tonight.
MR. GELLER: Well, I can't say any of us were surprised. Your parents have been unhappy ever since we've known them. Especially after that incident in Hawaii.
Mrs. Verhoeven's Daughter: Thats so sweet. (Takes the flowers.) Would you like to come in and say good-bye? Im sure it would mean a lot to her.
Charlie: Not so much, no. He had clearly memorized all the stuff to say, and some of it didn't even make any sense.
Chandler: Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian... (They all stare at him.) Did I say that out loud?
Phoebe: All right, all right, well just do our best. Okay? So lets say Im the interviewer and Im meeting you for the first time. Okay. "Hi! Come on in, Im uh, Regina Philange."
Ross: (in his head) Say something clever! (Pause.) Okay, doesnt have to be clever, it just has to be words. Say some words. (Pause) Any words will do. (Pause) Oh my God! This is the longest that anyone has not talked ever! (Pause) There is nothing you can say to make this worse!! So just say something!! (Pause.) (To her) I-I, I uh havent had sex in a very long time. (She leaves.) (In his head) Yeah, you really shouldnt have said anything.
Parker: I must say this apartment, its, its, There are no words
Chandler: You're damn right I'm right. I say you show this guy what you're made of. I say you stand your ground. I say you show him that you are the baddest hombre west of the lingerie.
Chandler: (to Ross) I couldn't say that I was naked because she's allowed too see me naked.
Ross: Well, I was gonna say sweet, but yeah-huh!
Rachel: I'd say from the looks of it; our naked buddy is moving.
Chandler: Oh its been going on way to long now. Yknow, I mean the first time he said it we were just passing each other in the hallway, so I didnt say anything. And then the next time he said, "Hey Toby, do you want a donut?" And I-I wanted a donut. And now its five years later, the donuts gone and Im still Toby.
Chandler: And people say you dont pay attention. No, this is a much better job. Its vice-president of a company that does data reconfiguration and statistical factoring for other companies.
Rachel: So does it really hurt as bad as they say?
Carol: (on phone) Phoebe hang on a second Ross wants to say something. (listens) What? (listens) (to Ross) You slept with someone else?!
Rachel: Dont say that I have no sentiment! (Starts to show Ross whats in the box.) This is a movie stub from our first date! This is an eggshell from the first time you made me breakfast in bed! (Holds up a bone) This is from the museum from the first time we were together. Okay, maybe I exchange gifts sometimes, but I keep the things that matter!
Chandler: All right, I'd say we make a pact. Neither of us will go out with Missy Goldberg.
Chandler: (coming from the bedroom) Say goodbye elves, I'm off to Tulsa.
Laura: Boy, you people are nice... And I've got to say... I think you're going to make excellent parents.
Rachel: You cant just say, Nice to meet you, good night?
Joey: Oh, you guys, with this joke. I gotta say, I know I cracked up, but Im not even sure I got it.
Chandler: Next time, can I say breathe?
CHANDLER: I don't know what to say. I'm sorry that we make more money than you. But we're not gonna feel guilty about it. We work really hard for it.
Passenger: Oh-no.(He bites his fist at her.)And by the way, it seems to be perfectly clear that you were on a break. (Rachel gasps and doesnt know what to say. He puts his headphones back on.)
ROSS: You know what, this is ridiculous, ok. This is your birthday, this is your party. I say we just put 'em all together and if they can't deal with it, who cares.
Rachel: Okay. Okay honey, hes fine, hes fine, lets just put him down. Come here, Ben. (sets him on the couch) See thats a good boy. (to Monica) How could you do that to him!! Ross trusted me, what is he going to say?!
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Oh, hi Wendy! (Listens) Yeah, eight o'clock. (Listens) What did we say? Ten dollars an hour?... (Listens) OK, great. (Listens) All right, I'll see you then. Bye. (hangs up)
Chandler: He didnt say anything about that to me.
Monica: Look, all were trying to say is, dont let what happened with Carol ruin what you got with Emily.
Mrs. Burgin: Oh, say no more!
Monica: I really like to say that Im-um (Pause) Yknow what Id really like to say? Im drunk!! (Mrs. Geller pulls the camera down.) Thats right mom and dad your little Harmonica is hammered!! (Ross grabs the camera out of his dads hands.) And guess what! Ive been drunk before! And Ive smoked a cigarette! And I got a box of Ding-Dongs hidden in my underwear drawer! Its all okay. Its okay because I turned thirty today. And, and I can do anything I want! Because I am a grown up. (Falls over sideways with Ross filming the fall.)
Ross: Oh, man! I can't believe she's actually leaving. How am I gonna say goodbye to Rachel?
Estelle: Well, youre just going to say no again but...gay porn.
Janine: Well I did. I really did. And you guys, Ive got to say, Im sorry if I was a little weird after the last time we went out. I guess I was just nervous or something.
Ross: I can't believe Rachel just moved on and didn't say anything to me
Ross: Here she comes. Dont say a word, okay? Just be cool, dont be y'know you.
Ross: Okay Ben, Santa has to go. Say good-bye!
Rachel: So what do you say? Can I be your girlfriend again?
Joey: No Im not. Why would you say that? Thats just mean.
Phoebe: Oh! I wont say, no to a movie!
Ross: Huh. Well, good luck to Dad. Say, how many more boxes would you have to sell in order to win?
Rachel: Hey, listen, Ronni, how long would you say Chandler's been in the shower?
Joey: Oh, man, why did have to go and say that for? Now that you told me I can't have it makes me want her even more!
Monica: What Phoebe meant to say was umm, how come youre having a party and were not invited?
Phoebe: Sure, yeah. I mean, its Joey. I dont want him to get hurt. Well, I must say, I am on fire! First Chandler, now Joey!
Ross: Really?! So what would you say Pheebs? Stuff like uh, "Keep your mitts off my grub?"
Monica: How about we play for more money, say 150?
Joey: Come on baby, dont go. Please? What do you say?
Phoebe: I cant say that didnt hurt. But Ill take you back Joey Tribbiani.
Monica: Sorry, lets go back! Cause youve got more to say.
Phoebe: I cant say because hes famous.
Joey: Okay look Rach, I know this is a lot. You dont have to say anything. You-you uh, you take as much time as you need. (Long pause as Rachel says nothing.) Okay, you gotta say something!
Joey: Thanks for everything Estelle. Bye. (Hangs up and reads the phone display) "out of area". Boy, I'll say.
Ross: OK, I'm gonna go say goodbye to the guys.
Joey: Oh Rachel look, don't say that, I think you just need a hug from Joey. Come on. Come on. (She hugs him and Joey looks out the window.) She's back! Hot girl's back!
Monica: You cant say that!! You-you dont know!! I mean I thought I was gonna pass out from the pain! Anyway I-I tried, but I-I couldnt...bend that way. So... (looks at Joey.)
Ross: Y'know what? It sounds so weird to say this but, I just had a great day with Janice!
Phoebe: Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you, it was just, it was so sweet. (She goes to hug them and they both flinch, thinking that Phoebe is about to attack them.)
Conan: I-I heard some of you guys talking about this earlier, but sometimes theres just a word that someone has to say that youll get hung up on. And itll justthe way you say the word is funny to everybody else.