words in movies
Monica: (To Chandler) You are going to make a joke about my special present! Why would you do that?!
Chandler: Oh thats right. Its your first day! So are you psyched to fight fake crime with your robot sidekick?
Joey: But I got to act with a robot Pheebs, and-and I dont know anything about technology! I cant even use Chandlers computer except to find porn! And-and thats only cause its right there when you turn it on!
Chandler: Are you judging them by their covers? Because youre really not supposed to do that.
Phoebe: Well, if you must know I have written 14 books. And as I am the only one who has read them, I can tell you that they all have been very well received.
Ross: (continuing) I just found out that Elizabeths dad wants to meet me.
The Producer: Im sorry, why dont we do that right now? Hes right here. (Points to a guy.)
Joey: Okay. Sorry about that (Mimics that cheek thing he just did.) Uh, so wheres C.H.E.E.S.E.?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is at the counter drinking coffee as Elizabeth enters with her dad, Paul. Elizabeth goes to kiss Ross, but he just kisses her on the forehead. By the way Paul is played by Bruce Willis. Yes, that Bruce Willis from Moonlighting, Die Hard, and Armageddon.]
Ross: Thats funny. Umm . (Pause, then serious) Its not funny.
Ross: Okay. I can, I can see that. Umm, but I think if you give me umm, one chance I can, I can change your mind.
Ross: Okay, umm I want you to know that I have never done anything like this before. I mean, I mean Ive been in um, relationships in general, uh but I have never done it with a studentI mean I notnot it! I mean, I mean I dontWe havent done it. Uh, I mean, I mean, weve-weve-weve done stuff. (Paul is not amused.) Okay, okay, a joke, a jokelighten the mood. Umm, two guys go into a bar. One of them is Irish.
Monica: How crazy that wed run into you!
Paul: I get that a lot.
Paul: Oh, you dont have to do that every time.
Chandler: But uh Ross, Ross is a great guy! I was roommates with him in college. Uh, funny story (He starts laughing then notices that Paul isnt happy.) Youre roommate in college died didnt he?
Rachel: Paul. Umm, I just wanted you to know that Ross really is a great guy.
Paul: Well maybe you can date him then that would save me the trouble of killing him. (Rachel laughs then starts looking at him.) Are you okay?
Rachel: Oh no! Yes! Of course, I know that! I justI meant yknow are you still a We or are you just You?
Ross: That was different!
Rachel: Ross look, look this is good for you. Okay? Lets face it, so far the guys not lovin ya! But I can turn that around! I got the inside track! We can all go out to dinner, yknow? And I can talk you up! Ross, the guy is a very, very successful lawyer!
Ross: How is that important?
Joey: Apparently, theres like a million guys out there that can play Mac, and theres only this one robot and this one guy who controls it! I didnt know he could get me fired! What am I going to do?
Monica: No sweetie, youve got to win over the guy that controls C.H.E.E.S.E.! Youve got to kiss some serious robot ass!
Joey: Thats not a bad idea. Yeah. Okay, but if I got to turn on the charm tomorrow Im not wasting anymore of it over here with you guys. (Starts to leave, but stops and turns to Phoebe.) Well, actually I got a little bit saved for you Pheebs. (Exits.)
Monica: Yeah! Thats why Im sleeping with him on the side.
Joey: Okay! (He yanks his hand away.) All right. Umm, all right Wayne, level with me. Okay? I-I keep hearing all these rumors that I might get fired. Okay, they even have actors coming in to read for my part! Come on man, you-you got to give me a second chance! I mean, I love-I love this little guy! (He grabs C.H.E.E.S.E.s arm and pulls it off at the elbow.) Ah-ah!! (Wayne is shocked.) Okay, thats why you didnt want me to touch him right? Here you go! Okay? (Hands Wayne the arm and he goes to fix it. Meanwhile Joey starts to berate himself.) Stupid! I cant believe it! God! (A very beautiful woman walks by.) (To her) Hey, how you doin? (He and her go over to talk and Wayne looks on with envy.)
Rachel: So it seemed that my prom date had stood me up, so Ross selflessly, offered to take me.
Rachel: Wow! I definitely did not see that one backfiring! Im gonna go to the bathroom.
Paul: Ross, look, I know Ive been giving you a lot of jabs and its partly because Im very protective of Lizzie, and partly because well, they just keep coming to me. But I have to admit that after all the wonderful things that Lizzie has told me and the many, many, (pause) many stories that Rachel has told me that, well (pause) youre not (pause) all bad.
Paul: And anyhow, Im sorry I was so harsh before, but you have to understand that I (pause) still look at Lizzie like shes a twelve-year-old girl.
Ross: Yeah. You know what? I know what you mean; I do that too.
Paul: Dont worry about it, I just didnt realize you were married. (Rachel returns and hears that.)
Rachel: Oh we were, but that was just a (pause as the audience reacts), I mean that was just a big drunken mistake.
Chandler: The only way that I said six would be if the sevens, let meet at seven, not at six.
Phoebe: Thats right.
Wayne: I-I-I saw you on stage talking to that beautiful woman, yknow Sarah?
Rachel: Now wait a minute thats not fair. He was married to me a hell of a lot longer than he was married to Emily, he just didnt tell me. (Everyone looks at her, Ross not happily.) Maybe I have to pee again. (Gets up to try to use the bathroom.)
Elizabeth: Yknow what daddy? If you dont like Ross, thats fine. It doesnt matter to me, Im gonna go out with him anyway.
Ross: Thats okay, Im not so crazy about myself right now either.
Ross: Thats okay Rach, were not liking Ross right now.
Joey: Oh, name one friend of yours that I did that with.
Ross: No, no, no. Don't do that! I want you to look her in the eyes, and tell her the truth.
CHAN: I'm telling you this thing won't print. Yes, I pressed that button like 100 times. You know, for a hot line you are not so hot. What? What is that in the background? Are you watching Star Trek?
Rachel: Im not paying for half of that! Im only staying here until my apartment gets fixed.
Mike: Uhm, did you guys know that there is a giant ice sculpture in the hall?
Rachel: Oh, 'scuse me. I was kinda using that machine.
Charlie: ... is it weird that it's not with each other?
Rachel: The nights are the hardest. (Checks her watch.) But then the day comes! And thats every bit as hard as the night. And then the night comes again
MONICA: That was you?
Monica: Phoebe, its okay. You dont have to tip toe around me. I-Ive been thinking about it and umm, yknow what? Im okay about not having that new relationship feeling
Phoebe: Yeah no, Im telling you Rachel has such a great eye for this stuff. Ross, yknow if you ever decide you need to redecorateAnd I think that you should. You should, you should ask Rachel to help.
Joey: I dont know why you say that so soon.
Chandler: Ohh, thats a good one.
Rachel: Barry, I'm sorry... I am so sorry... I know you probably think that this is all about what I said the other day about you making love with your socks on, but it isn't... it isn't, it's about me, and I ju- (She stops talking and dials the phone.) Hi, machine cut me off again... anyway...look, look, I know that some girl is going to be incredibly lucky to become Mrs. Barry Finkel, but it isn't me, it's not me. And not that I have any idea who me is right now, but you just have to give me a chance too... (The maching cuts her off again and she redials.)
Phoebe: That's so great! 'Cause you already know how to do that!
Rachel: Well, come on, Steve; let's not rule out nervous laughter. Hey, now wait a minute. Phoebe told me that - that you owned your own restaurant. That's impressive.
Ross: No-no-no, a bunch of out of control jackets take over an island. (Makes an unusual sound, then he realises that he still has his jacket on and quickly tries to shake it off, thinking its alive and attacking him.)
Rachel: Boy, are you gonna be sorry if that�s true.
Joey: (laughs) Thats cause sometimes I just do it through my wall to freak you out.
Rachel: Oh, yeah, check it. Definitely, I want some of that.
Rachel: Im fine, but thats not important. Whats important is how was she?
[Scene: Central Perk. Some time later that day. The group has left and Charlie is there when Ross enters.]
Ross: Nice. And by the way that uh, that line down my face?
Erica: I don't think so. Although, they did mention something about two heartbeats. But I thought that was just mine and the baby's. They kept saying both heartbeats are really strong, and I thought well, that's good 'cause I'm having a baby.
Mr. Geller: Its older than that. Ross was actually conceived right near this tuxedo.
Present Chandler's voice: Remember that big party? Freshman year? A week before Christmas vacation? I do. You had some visitors.
ROSS: You ever figure out what that thing's for?
Phoebe: I can't believe you did that!
Phoebe: (Singing) "Ipan Stripan, Glupi Glabi! " And that is the Swedish National Anthem! Thank you for asking! (looks annoyed)
Rachel: Ross, that girl just spent the entire evening talking to your friends, asking to hear stories about you, looking through Monicas photo albums, I mean you dont do that if youre just in it for two weeks.
PHOEBE: It's not a blue screen... it's just, maybe it was just really clear that day. OK, I have to talk to my grandmother. [turns to leave]
Ross: Except we're not. I mean, we haven't been a couple in like, six years. Oh my god, is that right? Has it been that long?
Phoebe: Ok. I mean I know I did the right thing. You know, Mike never wants to get married and I shouldn't be in a relationship that has no future... but... pretty soon I'm gonna miss him so much. I'm gonna wanna see him again and you have to stop me from doing that.
Monica: (angrily) That is exactly why I do not lend you stuff!! (Rachel looks over at Phoebe in resignation.) Okay?! I mean, first it's my jewelry! And if it's not my jewelry, it's-it's my blue sweater! And if it's not my sweater, it's my sunglasses!
Bill: I know the process is frustrating, but it's so worth it. Adopting Owen was the best thing that ever happened to us.
RTST: Yeah, isn't that great?
Phoebe: Concert. Yeah. That does put us in quite a pickle. Because you see Im very busy before and after the concert, and hes obviously busy during.
Joey: No Im not. Why would you say that? Thats just mean.
Rachel: Right,.. well,.. we never actually got to that... Oh, it was just so nice to see him again, y'know? It was comfortable, it was familiar... it was just nice!
JOEY: You could say that.
Ross: Did you see me? I was pretty good, huh? That is one fun game!
Ross: What, so he was a little analytical. That's what he does, y'know? C'mon, he's not that bad.
RACH: What's that? What? I saw my name. What is it?
Phoebe: Earl, youre not hearing me! All Im saying is that youre not alone all right? Everybody hates the people they work with! (One of her coworkers overhears that, and she mimes that she didnt mean him.)
Ross: (to Rachel) Okay, thats it, I cant take it anymore.
Wendy: Seriously? Happily married. So that phone call before, that was ... happy?
Monica: Ross, I cant believe youd do that!
CHANDLER: You understood that?
Chandler: I thought we werent gonna have bachelor/bachelorette parties! Yknow, we agreed that it was a silly tradition.
RACHEL: Oh yeah, I don't care how much she tells you she wants it, I don't care if begs, she pleads, she tells you she, she's gonna have sex with, with another man. That just means it's working.
Phoebe: Thanks a lot! I just got that jerk out of my mind!
Waiter: Sure. Sure. (Turns away, then turns back) Seconds up! (Joey glares at him.) Not that kind of table. (He walks away.)
Joey: No reason, Im just saying that uh Thats where Ill be.
Ross: Well, maybe the crazy fog has lifted and she realises that life without me.... a-sucks.
Chandler: (sighs with relief) Thank God, because I don't wanna do this either. You know, I was just doing because I thought that was what you wanted to do. You know, I'm the husband, I'm supposed to... bring the sperm.
Judge: So based on your petition you are seeking an annulment on the grounds that Mr. Geller is mentally unstable.
Joey: What?! Thats not fair! Its not my fault! I was off with my brides maid! And whos to say I wouldve even said yes?! (To Monica) I mean I wouldve said yes. Chandler look y-y-you are making way to big a deal out of this, all right? Look, everything worked out okay!
Joey: I did that too! They wouldnt give me her real name or her number. They said, "If I bothered them again theyd call the police." I said, "If you talk to the police, you tell them Im missing a ring!"
Ross: No! That would be stupid! You're having it for me!
Ross: Why dont they just jump out of an airplane?! Huh?! That-thats a fun date! Or burn each other with matches?! Thats fun too! Whew!!
Chandler: Okay, thats like the least fun game ever.
Ross: Me either... (He pulls up a stool so that he doesn't have to move his hand.)
Joey: Hey! Well I hope it goes better than the last time you did it for that girl downstairs, remember? (Phoebe glares at him.)
Phoebe: Thats it! 25 percent? That means thats its like 75 percent chance of no baby at all!
Joey: Yeah, are you just going down there to gawk at that hot girl with the belly button ring again?
Rachel: Oh does it matter?! All that matters is that you look so handsome.
Monica: What I said was, was that I understood. Joeys the one who agreed with you!
MONICA: Well, he told me he was going out with the guys, I just didn't know that you were the guys.
Monica: Who? Who do you know that are friends that just fool around?
CHANDLER: You hear that? We're the guys.
Monica: Yknow what? I-I think that umm, I dont feel like going to The Plaza.
Monica: God Ross, what is that?
Ross: Fine. I just need to know that youre not gonna tell your sister.
Rachel: That is so sad. Your missing out on so much, Ross. I mean, the bonding and the sharing, you know. And-and knowing that someone else is going through the same thing you are.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering with her own dollhouse, that she made herself.]
Monica: -but that wouldn't be fair to me, it wouldn't be fair to Alan- It wouldn't be fair to you!
Ross: Yup! You could plunk me down in the middle of any woman's uterus, no compass, and I can find my way out of there like that! (snaps fingers)
Rachel: No, not that, I mean, what about you and Mindy?
Chandler: (who has just entered) Is that Joey? Is that Joey? Let me talk to him! I wanna talk to him!
MNCA: [disgusted, trying not to show it] I love how it crumbles. Now see, your chocolate doesn't do that.
Rachel: Look, I am so so happy for you guys, but you getting married just reminds me of the fact that Im not. Im not even close. And I dont know, maybe I just wanted to make myself feel better. And I know that thats dumb, but oh my God you were so depressed when Ross got married that you slept with Chandler!
Rachel: Joey, yknow that you could just not throw the sticks up in the air.
PHOE: It's not that bad.
Chandler: Nothing happened? Nothing? So you didnt tell my girlfriend that you love her?
Joey: Because its all tainted with your betrayal. From now on this apartment is empty for me! And Im not happy about you either. (The bread maker dings) Oh, and just so you know, I made that bread for you. (Joey walks into his bedroom and slams the door.)
Mrs. Geller: I brought something that I want to give you, assuming of course that you want it. (She holds up an engagement ring.)
MONICA: With that moustache doesn't Chandler remind you of Aunt Sylvia?
Joey: Ooh, that bad, huh?
Joey: Yeah well thats because uh I stayed in my room. Yeah, you dont want to look in my hamper.
Conan: So that you will intentionally do something thattheyll-theyll intentionally screw it up?
(Ross starts looking for table six and finds out that its the kids table. He sees Mona sitting at another table.)
Rachel: Hi. (He helps her up.) Umm, I think theres something that we really need to talk about.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel enters and notices that Joey has set up a space for the baby where the couch was, complete with a crib.]
Ross: Really?! (To Rachel) Hey, yknow what? Since you have such a great sense of what I need, uh ooh, heres-heres 60 bucks, why dont you take Phoebe down to that Colonial flea market of yours and get me some stuff.
Monica: Believe me, that is not why we won't be doing that!
Rachel: But I dont, hmm... (on phone) Oh, who approved that order?! (listens) Well there is no Mark Robbinson in this office. (to Sophie) Get me Mark on the phone!
Ross: That does not sound stupid to me. You know, it's like the first time I had to make dinner for myself, after Carol left me? (the buzzer on the washer goes off) I'm sorry, that's all the time we have. Next on Ross...(opens up the washer) Uh-oh.
The Fireman: The next time you want to dump a fire alarm in a trash chute, dont wrap it in a blanket that says, "Property of Phoebe Buffay not Monica."
Joey: All right thats it! Youre yelling and I dont see you taking your top off! I quit!
Phoebe: No, no actually, he's smiling.. and... Oh my God, don't do that!!