words in movies
Monica: Well umm, I was thinking that maybe we could come up with a system where we trade of being maid of honor for each other. Like hypothetically, if Phoebe were mine
Monica: Rachel would be Phoebes, I would be Rachels, that way we all get to do it once and no one would get upset.
Rachel: Yeah thats actually a pretty good idea.
Phoebe: Yeah, Ill do that. So who gets to be yours?
Monica: (laughs) Well thats the best part. Umm, you guys get to decide!
Phoebe: Wh-why is that the best part?
Rachel: Well of course we will help you decide! We will do anything we can to help you! Now, I would like to make a toast, to the future Mrs. Chandler Bing (A woman at the table behind them overhears Chandlers name and starts listening closer), my best friend, and truly one of the nicest people that
Monica: Yeah thats right.
Rachel: Oh my God Phoebe! I mean Im justWait a minute. If Im your maid of honor that means you are Monicas.
Phoebe: Oh! Well, if thats what you want
Phoebe: And no, oh please, oh please let me finish. (Rachel stops talking.) Oh I guess that was it.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Die Hard has ended, only I dont think Joey and Ross know that yet. As you see, they are both asleep. And theyre on the same couch. Which means theyre sleeping together. Not like Joey is at one end and Ross is on the other, they both happen to be lying down and sleeping together. Well, there hasnt been any clothes removed so not that kind of sleeping together. Not that theres anything wrong with that. That is unless youre a Republican in which that kind of thing will bring about the downfall of Western society, especially if they should happen to want to get married. Anyway, let me recap. No, there is too much, let me sum up. Ross and Joey are taking a nap together on top of each other and both wake-up at the same time, realize what they just did, scream, and jump up.]
Ross: We fell asleep! That is all.
Ross: I think that would be best.
Monica: Yeah hey, a weird thing happened today whey I was at brunch. This woman overheard that I was marrying you and-and then she she wished me good luck.
Chandler: Thats sweet.
Chandler: Well, lets see (Finding the picture he wants.) Okay uh, is that her? (Pointing to the picture.)
Chandler: Well, you know what they say, elephants never forget. (Monica is not amused by that statement.) Seriously, good luck marrying me.
Joey: Hey! Well I hope it goes better than the last time you did it for that girl downstairs, remember? (Phoebe glares at him.)
Rachel: All right thats it! I am maid of honor!
Joey: Yes we do! Now look, that was the best nap I ever had!!
Joey: Come on! Admit it! That was the best nap you ever had!
Monica: No! But because he thought I was to faaaaa . (Chandler emerges, without flushing by the way.) And every time I think about it, it makes me feel as bad as I did in fifth grade! Yknow, I-I really think that you should apologize to Julie.
Chandler: What? Are you kidding? That was like 16 years ago.
Chandler: Okay, I will do it. But I have to warn you; this may make me a better person and that is not the man you feel in love with!
Rachel: Look Monica, getting cold feet is very common. Yknow, its-its just because of all the anticipation and you just have to remember that you love Chandler. And also, I ran out on a wedding. You dont get to keep the gifts.
Joey: (out of his Monica character) Very good! Drawing on your own experience, I like that!
Ross: (playing the drunk uncle) When Monica was a little girl, I remember that(Phoebe screams and tackles him)Ooh!! Ow! Very good!
Rachel: Okay! Okay! Umm, Websters Dictionary defines marriage as (Ross and Joey start writing.) Okay!! Forget that! That sucks!! Okay, never mind! Forget it! Umm, umm, okay, uh I met, I-I met, I met Monica when we were just a couple of six year olds and I became friends with Chandler when he was 25, although he seemed like a six year old.
Ross and Joey: Oh! Thats nice.
Rachel: Thank you. Thank you very much. Umm, Ive known them separately and Ive known them together and-and to know them as a couple is to know that you are truly in the presence of love. So I would like to raise my glass (Grabs a glass and holds it up) to Monica and Chandler and the beautiful adventure they are about to embark upon together. I can think of no two people better prepared for the journey.
Phoebe: Okay, I cant believe that Monica and Chandler are getting married. I remember talking about this day with Rachel while we were showering together, naked. (Raises her glass and drinks.)
Julie: Thats why you broke up with me?
Chandler: You-you-you didnt know that. (Pause as she nods no.) Well, I guess my work here is done!
Joey: All right, well first of all I would like to say that you both performed very well. Okay? You should be proud of yourselves. And-and I would also like to say that in this competition there are no losers. Well, except for RachelDamnit!
Rachel: Well then I demand a recount! (Hmm, I wonder where Ive heard that before.)
Ross: Actually, it wasnt that close.
Joey: Boy I tell ya, that judging stuff took a lot out of me.
Ross: Why-why would I care about that?
Joey: No reason, Im just saying that uh Thats where Ill be.
Chandler: As bad as that went I actually enjoyed myself. I think that Im going to apologize for all of the stupid things I do.
Monica: In one year?! My God what did she eat? Her-her family! Thats not the point.
Monica: Well Thats not the only time this was an issue. You remember when umm, you spent Thanksgiving with us? You called me fat.
Chandler: Okay. Okay, now wait a minute that was totally different.
Chandler: You were not supposed to hear that! I said that behind you back!
Monica: What if I have babies, okay? I mean Im gonna look different. Im okay with that, but Im not sure that you are!
Chandler: Look you have to realize I dont think of you as a thin, beautiful woman. (Monica glares at him.) See this is one of things that I can apologize for later! Look, what I mean is youre Monica! Okay? And I am in love with Monica.
Phoebe: Thats ridiculous Rachel, we were all babies once. (Rachel looks at her.) Oh, you mean today.
Rachel: Yeah. Yeah, and yknow you-you deserve to win. And-and yknow I was thinking about it, if-if youre Monicas maid of honor that means I get to be yours.
Phoebe: Oh thats so sweet thanks.
Rachel: Here is a book of poetry that I know Monica loves. And-and ohh God this is funny, look, this is a picture of one Halloween where she dressed up as a bride. (Shows Phoebe the picture.) And look, she made me carry her train, which was weird because I was Wonder Woman. Oh and heres a little purse that I found. (Hands her the purse) Yknow I just thought that maybe they could hold the rings in there.
Rachel: Oh, I forgot this was in here. Umm, this was the uh garter that I was saving for my wedding and I wanted it to be Monicas something borrowed and its blue. (Starts to cry again.) Yeah
Phoebe: Yknow Rach, I think that, I think you should be Monicas made of honor.
Phoebe: Its fine. I mean, this is something that youve been thinking about since you were what, 14? (Shes referring to the Halloween picture.)
Phoebe: Well, we just decided that Rachel is gonna be your maid of honor.
Monica: (gasps) Ohh, wow! Thats great! (Rachel and Monica hug.) Oh wow! We really have to start planning! I have, I have a lot of really specific ideas! We should probably get together like four times per week. You can come over to my place; well get together before work! What do you say, 6:30, my place? Im so excited! (Runs out leaving Rachel completely stunned and Phoebe laughing.)
MONICA: That was you?
Monica: Phoebe, its okay. You dont have to tip toe around me. I-Ive been thinking about it and umm, yknow what? Im okay about not having that new relationship feeling
Phoebe: Yeah no, Im telling you Rachel has such a great eye for this stuff. Ross, yknow if you ever decide you need to redecorateAnd I think that you should. You should, you should ask Rachel to help.
Joey: I dont know why you say that so soon.
Chandler: Ohh, thats a good one.
Rachel: Barry, I'm sorry... I am so sorry... I know you probably think that this is all about what I said the other day about you making love with your socks on, but it isn't... it isn't, it's about me, and I ju- (She stops talking and dials the phone.) Hi, machine cut me off again... anyway...look, look, I know that some girl is going to be incredibly lucky to become Mrs. Barry Finkel, but it isn't me, it's not me. And not that I have any idea who me is right now, but you just have to give me a chance too... (The maching cuts her off again and she redials.)
Phoebe: That's so great! 'Cause you already know how to do that!
Rachel: Well, come on, Steve; let's not rule out nervous laughter. Hey, now wait a minute. Phoebe told me that - that you owned your own restaurant. That's impressive.
Ross: No-no-no, a bunch of out of control jackets take over an island. (Makes an unusual sound, then he realises that he still has his jacket on and quickly tries to shake it off, thinking its alive and attacking him.)
Rachel: Boy, are you gonna be sorry if that�s true.
Joey: (laughs) Thats cause sometimes I just do it through my wall to freak you out.
Rachel: Oh, yeah, check it. Definitely, I want some of that.
Rachel: Im fine, but thats not important. Whats important is how was she?
[Scene: Central Perk. Some time later that day. The group has left and Charlie is there when Ross enters.]
Ross: Nice. And by the way that uh, that line down my face?
Erica: I don't think so. Although, they did mention something about two heartbeats. But I thought that was just mine and the baby's. They kept saying both heartbeats are really strong, and I thought well, that's good 'cause I'm having a baby.
Mr. Geller: Its older than that. Ross was actually conceived right near this tuxedo.
Present Chandler's voice: Remember that big party? Freshman year? A week before Christmas vacation? I do. You had some visitors.
ROSS: You ever figure out what that thing's for?
Phoebe: I can't believe you did that!
Phoebe: (Singing) "Ipan Stripan, Glupi Glabi! " And that is the Swedish National Anthem! Thank you for asking! (looks annoyed)
Rachel: Ross, that girl just spent the entire evening talking to your friends, asking to hear stories about you, looking through Monicas photo albums, I mean you dont do that if youre just in it for two weeks.
PHOEBE: It's not a blue screen... it's just, maybe it was just really clear that day. OK, I have to talk to my grandmother. [turns to leave]
Ross: Except we're not. I mean, we haven't been a couple in like, six years. Oh my god, is that right? Has it been that long?
Phoebe: Ok. I mean I know I did the right thing. You know, Mike never wants to get married and I shouldn't be in a relationship that has no future... but... pretty soon I'm gonna miss him so much. I'm gonna wanna see him again and you have to stop me from doing that.
Monica: (angrily) That is exactly why I do not lend you stuff!! (Rachel looks over at Phoebe in resignation.) Okay?! I mean, first it's my jewelry! And if it's not my jewelry, it's-it's my blue sweater! And if it's not my sweater, it's my sunglasses!
Bill: I know the process is frustrating, but it's so worth it. Adopting Owen was the best thing that ever happened to us.
RTST: Yeah, isn't that great?
Phoebe: Concert. Yeah. That does put us in quite a pickle. Because you see Im very busy before and after the concert, and hes obviously busy during.
Joey: No Im not. Why would you say that? Thats just mean.
Rachel: Right,.. well,.. we never actually got to that... Oh, it was just so nice to see him again, y'know? It was comfortable, it was familiar... it was just nice!
JOEY: You could say that.
Ross: Did you see me? I was pretty good, huh? That is one fun game!
Ross: What, so he was a little analytical. That's what he does, y'know? C'mon, he's not that bad.
RACH: What's that? What? I saw my name. What is it?
Phoebe: Earl, youre not hearing me! All Im saying is that youre not alone all right? Everybody hates the people they work with! (One of her coworkers overhears that, and she mimes that she didnt mean him.)
Ross: (to Rachel) Okay, thats it, I cant take it anymore.
Wendy: Seriously? Happily married. So that phone call before, that was ... happy?
Monica: Ross, I cant believe youd do that!
CHANDLER: You understood that?
Chandler: I thought we werent gonna have bachelor/bachelorette parties! Yknow, we agreed that it was a silly tradition.
RACHEL: Oh yeah, I don't care how much she tells you she wants it, I don't care if begs, she pleads, she tells you she, she's gonna have sex with, with another man. That just means it's working.
Phoebe: Thanks a lot! I just got that jerk out of my mind!
Waiter: Sure. Sure. (Turns away, then turns back) Seconds up! (Joey glares at him.) Not that kind of table. (He walks away.)
Ross: Well, maybe the crazy fog has lifted and she realises that life without me.... a-sucks.
Chandler: (sighs with relief) Thank God, because I don't wanna do this either. You know, I was just doing because I thought that was what you wanted to do. You know, I'm the husband, I'm supposed to... bring the sperm.
Judge: So based on your petition you are seeking an annulment on the grounds that Mr. Geller is mentally unstable.
Joey: What?! Thats not fair! Its not my fault! I was off with my brides maid! And whos to say I wouldve even said yes?! (To Monica) I mean I wouldve said yes. Chandler look y-y-you are making way to big a deal out of this, all right? Look, everything worked out okay!
Joey: I did that too! They wouldnt give me her real name or her number. They said, "If I bothered them again theyd call the police." I said, "If you talk to the police, you tell them Im missing a ring!"
Ross: No! That would be stupid! You're having it for me!
Ross: Why dont they just jump out of an airplane?! Huh?! That-thats a fun date! Or burn each other with matches?! Thats fun too! Whew!!
Chandler: Okay, thats like the least fun game ever.
Ross: Me either... (He pulls up a stool so that he doesn't have to move his hand.)
Phoebe: Thats it! 25 percent? That means thats its like 75 percent chance of no baby at all!
Joey: Yeah, are you just going down there to gawk at that hot girl with the belly button ring again?
Rachel: Oh does it matter?! All that matters is that you look so handsome.
Monica: What I said was, was that I understood. Joeys the one who agreed with you!
MONICA: Well, he told me he was going out with the guys, I just didn't know that you were the guys.
Monica: Who? Who do you know that are friends that just fool around?
CHANDLER: You hear that? We're the guys.
Monica: Yknow what? I-I think that umm, I dont feel like going to The Plaza.
Monica: God Ross, what is that?
Ross: Fine. I just need to know that youre not gonna tell your sister.
Rachel: That is so sad. Your missing out on so much, Ross. I mean, the bonding and the sharing, you know. And-and knowing that someone else is going through the same thing you are.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering with her own dollhouse, that she made herself.]
Monica: -but that wouldn't be fair to me, it wouldn't be fair to Alan- It wouldn't be fair to you!
Ross: Yup! You could plunk me down in the middle of any woman's uterus, no compass, and I can find my way out of there like that! (snaps fingers)
Rachel: No, not that, I mean, what about you and Mindy?
Chandler: (who has just entered) Is that Joey? Is that Joey? Let me talk to him! I wanna talk to him!
MNCA: [disgusted, trying not to show it] I love how it crumbles. Now see, your chocolate doesn't do that.
Rachel: Look, I am so so happy for you guys, but you getting married just reminds me of the fact that Im not. Im not even close. And I dont know, maybe I just wanted to make myself feel better. And I know that thats dumb, but oh my God you were so depressed when Ross got married that you slept with Chandler!
Rachel: Joey, yknow that you could just not throw the sticks up in the air.
PHOE: It's not that bad.
Chandler: Nothing happened? Nothing? So you didnt tell my girlfriend that you love her?
Joey: Because its all tainted with your betrayal. From now on this apartment is empty for me! And Im not happy about you either. (The bread maker dings) Oh, and just so you know, I made that bread for you. (Joey walks into his bedroom and slams the door.)
Mrs. Geller: I brought something that I want to give you, assuming of course that you want it. (She holds up an engagement ring.)
MONICA: With that moustache doesn't Chandler remind you of Aunt Sylvia?
Joey: Ooh, that bad, huh?
Joey: Yeah well thats because uh I stayed in my room. Yeah, you dont want to look in my hamper.
Conan: So that you will intentionally do something thattheyll-theyll intentionally screw it up?
(Ross starts looking for table six and finds out that its the kids table. He sees Mona sitting at another table.)
Rachel: Hi. (He helps her up.) Umm, I think theres something that we really need to talk about.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel enters and notices that Joey has set up a space for the baby where the couch was, complete with a crib.]
Ross: Really?! (To Rachel) Hey, yknow what? Since you have such a great sense of what I need, uh ooh, heres-heres 60 bucks, why dont you take Phoebe down to that Colonial flea market of yours and get me some stuff.
Monica: Believe me, that is not why we won't be doing that!
Rachel: But I dont, hmm... (on phone) Oh, who approved that order?! (listens) Well there is no Mark Robbinson in this office. (to Sophie) Get me Mark on the phone!
Ross: That does not sound stupid to me. You know, it's like the first time I had to make dinner for myself, after Carol left me? (the buzzer on the washer goes off) I'm sorry, that's all the time we have. Next on Ross...(opens up the washer) Uh-oh.
The Fireman: The next time you want to dump a fire alarm in a trash chute, dont wrap it in a blanket that says, "Property of Phoebe Buffay not Monica."
Joey: All right thats it! Youre yelling and I dont see you taking your top off! I quit!
Phoebe: No, no actually, he's smiling.. and... Oh my God, don't do that!!
Rachel: Well then honey, buy the lamp! Hey, we have that 60 bucks from Ross.
Ross: (putting out the fire with a squeeze bottle of water) Okay, thats a fire. Oh yeah. Oh yeah.
Joey: Are we talking about one of those big boats that carry cars that go like five miles an hour?
SUSAN: Oh shout, that would have been fun.
ROSS: That is so good! Do it again!
Ross: I dont know, but I ah, I have the feeling that my being there will do it. Ill go over and I will borrow something. Juice!! I need juice!!
Ross: What?! The guys against the girls? See, thats ridiculous Monica, because Im only down by three touchdowns.
Rachel: Yeah, just so weird seeing him like that, you know? I mean he is a doctor, you don't expect doctors to get sick!
Phoebe: Okay, we have like ten minutes. Do you want me to get into that now?!
Phoebe: That you like, (snappily confronting Joey over the heads of the knitting circle) we get it. You like her. Great!