words in movies
Rachel: It's so that I can spend Thanksgiving with my family. See, every year we go skiing in Vail, and normally my father pays for my ticket, but I sort of started the whole independence thing, you know, which is actually why I took this job.
Rachel: Ok, I, I hear what you're sayin'. I'm with you. Um, but I, but I'm trying really hard. And I think I'm doing better. I really do. Does anybody need coffee? (everyone in the place raises their hand) Oh, look at that.
Rachel: Ok, ok, that's fine. Fine. Hey, I'm sorry about that spill before. (picks up the tip he leaves) Only $98.50 to go.
Monica: Yes, they are. The Blymens invited them.
Chandler: And this from the cry-for-help department. Are you wearing makeup?
Joey: You know those posters for the city free clinic?
Phoebe: You know, the asthma guy was really cute.
(Ross comes back to the couch.)
Ross: Will you make the mashed potatoes with the lumps?
Monica: You know, they're not actually supposed to have... (Ross looks at her sheepishly) I'll work on the lumps. Joey, you're going home, right?
Monica: And I assume, Chandler, you are still boycotting all the pilgrim holidays.
Ross: Thanks. Yeah, Carol borrowed it for a class, and I have to get it back to the museum.
Susan: Yes, I'm familiar with the concept. We can just look for it.
Ross: Ok. (browsing the apartment) Wow, you guys sure have a lot of books about bein' a lesbian.
Ross: (picking up a book) Hey, hey, Yertle the Turtle. A classic.
Susan: Actually, I'm reading it to the baby.
Ross: The uh, the baby that hasn't been born yet? Wouldn't that mean you're... crazy?
Susan: Yeah, all the time. I want the baby to know my voice.
Susan: Yeah, yeah, all the time.
Susan: But um, we just refer to you as Bobo the Sperm Guy.
Phoebe: Oh, I believe it. I think the baby can totally hear everything. I can show you. Look, this will seem a little weird, but you put your head inside this turkey, and then we'll all talk, and you'll hear everything we say.
Rachel: Thanks, you can just put it on the table.
Rachel: Thanks, you can just put it on the table.
(Rachel opens it. Inside is the money she needed.)
Chandler: We just finished this magnificent Thanksgiving dinner. I have--and I remember this part vividly--a mouthful of pumpkin pie, and this is the moment my parents choose to tell me they're getting divorced.
[Scene: The subway, Joey spots a gorgeous woman waiting. He goes up to her.]
Joey: Yeah, at Macy's. You were the Obsession girl, right? I was the Aramis guy. (pretends to spray cologne) Aramis? Aramis?
Joey: I gotta tell you. You're the best in the business.
(Joey turns around and sees his face on a poster in the subway. The poster says: What Mario isn't telling you...V.D., you never know who might have it. A variety of scenes are shown with the poster displayed all over New York City.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey enters, amongst snickers from the gang.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is cooking Thanksgiving dinner. Chandler is standing in the doorway, not wanting to participate in the festivities.]
Ross: I don't know. It's just not the same without Mom in the kitchen.
Rachel: I got the tickets! I got the tickets! Five hours from now, shoop, shoop, shoop.
Chandler: Ok, we all laughed when you did it with the stuffing, but that's not funny anymore.
Monica: All right, fine. Tonight's potatoes will be both mashed with lumps, and in the form of tots.
Monica: What, Phoebe, did you whip the potatoes? Ross needs lumps!
Chandler: The most unbelievable thing has happened. Underdog has just gotten away.
Joey: The balloon?
Chandler: No, no, the actual cartoon character. Of course the balloon. It's all over the news. Right before he reached Macy's, he broke free and was spotted flying over Washington Square Park. I'm goin' to the roof, who's with me?
Chandler: Come on. An 80-foot inflatable dog let loose over the city. How often does that happen?
Monica: Got the keys? or Got the keys!
(Everyone leaves the apartment.)
Carol: Just aim for the bump.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the group is coming back from the roof.]
Rachel: I loved the moment when you first saw the giant dog shadow all over the park.
Monica: Ok, right about now the turkey should be crispy on the outside, juicy on the inside. Why are we standing here?
Rachel: We're waiting for you to open the door. You got the keys.
Rachel: Yes, you do. When we left, you said, "got the keys."
Monica: No I didn't. I asked, "got the ke-eys?"
Rachel: No, no, no, you said, "got the keys".
Chandler: Do either of you have the keys?
Monica: (panicked) The oven is on.
(Joey leaves to get the copy of the key.)
Ross: Shh! (singing) Here we come, walkin' down the street, get the funniest looks from, everyone we meet. Hey, hey! (to Carol) Hey, uh, did you just feel that?
Carol: No, no that was the first.
Ross: (singing) Hey, hey, you're my baby, and I can't wait to meet you. When you come out I'll buy you a bagel, and then we'll go to the zoo.
Ross: (singin) Hey, hey, I'm your daddy. I'm the one without any breasts.
[Scene: The Hallway, Joey has a tray full of keys, and is trying each one in the lock.]
Joey: Hey, I got one keyhole and about a zillion keys. You do the math.
Rachel: (grabs Chandler by the shirt) All right, listen, smirky. If it wasn't for you and your stupid balloon, I would be on a plane watching a woman do this (makes a gesture like a stewardess pointing out exits) right now. But I'm not.
Monica: I swear you said you had the keys.
Rachel: No, I didn't. I wouldn't say I had the keys unless I had the keys, and I obviously didn't have the keys.
Phoebe: Ooh, ok, that's it. Enough with the keys. No one say keys.
Monica: Why would I have the keys?
Rachel: Aside from the fact that you said you had them?
Chandler: Ok, Monica, only dogs can hear you now, so, look, the door's open. Here we go.
(They walk in. Smoke fills the apartment.)
Monica: Well, the turkey's burnt. (checking pots) Potatoes are ruined, potatoes are ruined, potatoes are ruined.
Ross: Here we come, walkin' down thethis doesn't smell like Mom's.
Monica: No, it doesn't, does it? But you wanted lumps, Ross? (picks up the pan of badly burnt potatoes) Well, here you go, buddy, ya got one.
Rachel: Oh, god, this is great! The plane is gone, so it looks like I'm stuck here with you guys.
[Time lapse. Everyone is upset with each other. Phoebe is at the window.]
Phoebe: Ugly Naked Guy's taking his turkey out of the oven. Oh my god. He's not alone. Ugly Naked Guy's having Thanksgiving dinner with Ugly Naked Gal.
(They all run to the window.)
[Time lapse. The gang is around the table, eating grilled cheese sandwiches.]
Ross: I don't even wanna know about the dark cheese.
Phoebe: Come on, you know, Thanksgiving. Ooh, you got the bigger half. What'd you wish for?
Joey: The bigger half.
Chandler: I'd like to propose a toast. Little toast here, ding ding. I know this isn't the kind of Thanksgiving that all of you all planned, but for me, this has been really great, you know, I think because it didn't involve divorce or projectile vomiting. Anyway, I was just thinking, I mean, if you'd gone to Vail, and if you guys'd been with your family, if you didn't have syphilis and stuff, we wouldn't be all together, you know? So I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm very thankful that all of your Thanksgivings sucked.
[Scene: The Subway, Joey sees his poster and he peels off the caption on his poster, revealing more posters underneath. The captions read, as follows:
Phoebe: Oh no, don't hate, you don't want to put that out into the universe.
Ken: (reading off his card) "A donation has been made in your name to the New York City Ballet".
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, The One With George Stephanopoulos, Phoebe is showing Monica and Rachel that she brought Operation to their slumber party.]
Phoebe: (Thinks for a moment.) Aw, dammit! (Slams the phone down.)
(Monica goes to the door.� Chandler slides behind it as she opens it slightly.)
[Scene: The hallway between the apartments, Rachel is returning from her date with Dave.]
Rachel: Oh, I have to pee. If I dont come out in five minutes its because Ive choked to death on the potpourri stink. (Goes into the bathroom.)
Chandler: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What is all this pressure?! Is this some new kind of strategy? Why dont you put down your copy of The Rules huh mantrap?!
Kathy: Can I borrow the keys to your apartment?
Joey: And Ill have all the muffins.
Joey: Hey, Monica bought a bed from the Mattress King?
Rachel: (taking the brush back) Okay. Lets use this brush. (Hands him another one.)
Monica: (hums for a while, then gives up, and in her head) If it bothers you that much, just go out and get the shoes. No. Don't do this. This is stupid! I don't have to prove anything, I'm gonna go get them...But then everyone will know. Unless I get them, and then wake up really early and put them back! ...I need help! (She buries her head in her pillow.)
Chandler: Look, Joey, Kathy is clearly not fulfilling your emotional needs. But Casey, I mean granted I only saw the back of her head, but I got this sense that shes-shes smart, and funny, and gets you.
Joey groans and gets off the phone: The producer from Days left a message on my machine asking why I wasn't at the parade. They said everybody's pissed off at me.. <whiny voice> And they all got to meet Santa!
Phoebe: What?! Oh my... (sees the remains of the house) Oh my God!! What happened?!
DR HORTON: Hard day huh? First the medical award, this.
Chandler: The agency must have made some mistake. My wife is not a reverend and I'm not a doctor.
Rachel: And the fact that you were jeopardising my career never entered your mind?!
MIKE: So, except for the fermentation process, beer and ale are basically the same thing.� Fascinating isn't it.
Mr Zelner: Well, I guess having Rachel back wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.
(Ross turns his back on Paul and makes a I hate that guy face. Paul does the same thing.)
Rachel: Y�guys ever heard the story about when Rosses mom went to the beauty salon?
Monica: Yknow what, lets do the catering business.
Monica: All right, hand me that other box of photos; that's the very last one.
Joey: Look, if Im bringing home a woman who cant stand being around a baby, then maybe I dont want to be with that woman! Or maybe well just do it in the bathroom of the club!
(they shake hands the way friends would. There's a muffin on the table, and Ross breaks off a piece and wants to put it in his mouth.)
Rachel: (she enters wearing a bath-robe) Hey... Hi you guys! Listen, you know what? I'm not feeling really well. I think I can't get out for the play.
Rachel: Wh Come on! Remember? We were on the sleeping porch! We couldnt stop giggling? And our coconuts kept knockin together?
Mark: Hi. I just talked to Joanna, and she loves you. You got it, you got the job.
Joey: Theres a lost and found? (Gunther sets the box up on the table.) My shoe! (Grabs it out of the box.)
Phoebe: Oh no-no, no, I made a promise to myself that the next time I would talk to Ursula would be over my dead body. And thats not happening til October 15th, 2032.
Joey: Oh-ooh, thats the turn-on.
Chandler and Joey: Awwwww!! (They lean back all the way.) Awwwwwww!!!
RACHEL: Hey, how'd the interview go?
Amanda: Hello Monica. It’s Amanda calling again. I am in the neighborhood hoping I can pop by your flat!
[Scene: The plane. Rachel's telling her story to the passenger on her left. The one on her left is still wearing his headphones.]
(Suddenly Rachel clears her throat and the camera cuts to the rest of the gang staring at them. Needless to say Joey and Ross are shocked and slowly turn their heads to see the gang.)
Dr. Green: Ross? Whats with the neck?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is trying to pry more information about Chandler and Monica from Joey who's sitting on the couch and busy downing a pizza.]
Charlie: And then, and then you said that thing about, about bringing the Mesozoic era in the 21st century.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel and Ross are in the kitchen. Phoebe is sitting at the couch with oven mits on her hands.]
Joey: Hey! Dont you hang up on me! Ill marry you and me right now! I have the power!
Joey: Ah well, the ah, Pennsylvania Dutch, come from Pennsylvania.
Joanna: Uh-oh, tunnel. (The phone gets cut off)
JOEY: (listens at the door.)� No.� (pause) All right, I'm going in.
Ross: (just trying to get out of the conversation) Ah well, cant blame a guy for trying!
Ross: 30 seconds on the clock. 5 questions wins the game. The lightning round begins now! What is Joeys favorite food?
Ross: (to the rest of the gang) Were just gonna be friends.
Paul: So Lizzie, are-are-are you planning on staying the night?
[Scene: The beach house, its still raining. Chandler is building a sand castle, Rachel is doing Monicas nails, and theyre all drinking margaritas, obviously bored.]
Rachel: Oh-oh, sorry, its this way, its this way. (Motions to the correct way.)
The Director: Hey, lovely! Come, talk to me a minute! (she goes over to him)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is approaching the bathroom door behind which Chandler is using the facility.]
Rachel: Oh, I beg to differ. The Pictionary incident?
Ross: Chandler, I want you to run a post pattern to the left, okay. And sweetie..
Monica and Ross: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 (Ross runs to be caught by Monica, but she moves out of the way)
Joey: It's like if you woke up one day and found out your dad was leading this double life. He's like actually some spy, working for the C.I.A. (Considers) That'd be cool.... This blows!
[Cut to Central Perk, the entire gang is there.]
Chandler: no I'm not quite sure you got the right movie that's all.
Phoebe: Oh, how do you play the shadow game?
Monica: Pass the cheese, please.
[Scene: Rosss apartment, he and Emily are getting ready to go to the airport.]
Chandler: Hey Joe! How's the second draft of the letter coming?
Phoebe: Yeah thats right Chandler does still think Im pregnant. He hasnt asked me how Im feeling or offered to carry my bags. Boy, I feel bad for the woman who ends up with him. (Monica looks at her.) After you of course.
[Scene: The museum planetarium. Ross and Rachel enter on stage.]
Joey: The Red Ross! Okay.
Chandler: (notices something) Ross is wearing leather pants! Does nobody else see that Ross is wearing leather pants? (Pause, no one speaks.) Someone comment on the pants!
Joey: Listen, I know the invitation says 6:00, but does that mean that you want people to get there at six, or the show is gonna start right at six?
Chandler: (asking a man leaning against the wall) What is going on?
RACHEL: Monica, what are you talking about? You don't know the first thing about the stock market.
Chandler: Yes, yes, we had the sex.
Monica: Hey-hey, how goes the dancing? Gay yet?
Phoebe: Oh yeah, thats right, the keyboards, huh?
[Scene: Museum of Natural History. Ross enters the display where Rachel is waiting.]
Monica: Uhm the... the ministry... of names... bureau...
Phoebe: No offence but, yknow sometimes its hard to understand you, yknow with the accent, so
[Cut to Living Room, Rachel is trying to close the door on Ross.]
Rachel: I hate this apartment! I hate the color of these walls! I hate the fact that this place still smells like bird! I hate that singing guy!
Rachel: Uh.. okay, sure! Thanks! (She hands him the broom and sits down.)
Chandler: Okay, here is the phone bill. (Hands it to Joey.)
Ross: Thanks. (kisses her on the lips)
Joey: (annoyed) I dont know! (Goes back to looking through the pipe.) (Pause) Yeah, I do.
Rachel: (handing him the letter) Its just some things Ive been thinking about. Some things about us, and before we can even think about the two of us getting back together, I just need to know how you feel about this stuff.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is looking around the shop as Phoebe returns from getting some more coffee.]
Rachel: Thanks for lunch, Chandler. Y'know, you didnt have to walk me all the way back up here.
Ticket Agent: The last minute fare on this ticket is twenty seven hundred dollars.
[Scene: Heeling Hands Inc., Phoebes work, she is giving a massage to the guy, Rick, she likes.]
Ross: Yeah well, if ah, if thats the rule this weekend... (She gets up) No!
Rachel: You need that, you need that too cause obviously, a thief could just tear this up. (Rips up the note.)
Chandler: The fact that you'd even ask that question shows how little you know me.
ROSS: (takes the phone, but speaks to Mike) I don't understand what just happened here.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is on the phone. Rachel walks in and overhears the conversation.]
(Joey slides a plate away from Monica towards Chandler, who hides it under the table.)
Ross: Oh, oh, ok, great. You know what, while you're at it she said another word the other day, why don't you, why don't you look up: pbbqqt....
Phoebe: So... What's the deal with umm, you and Joey?
Alice: Phoebes right Frank. I know its hard to hear, but it wouldve been wrong to go through with it. I-I-I was being selfish, even though we, we want the same things now, in the future we may not. (to Phoebe) Is that it, is that what it is?
Chandler: How much did I love The King and I? (Oh, you get the point by now.)
Rachel: I dont care about the little dude! I cant! I cannot listen to anymore of this! Yknow, the only person who would want to listen to this is a mental health professional! And then its only because they get paid $100 an hour! Do you know how much money I couldve made listening to you? $2,000! And do you know when I figured that out? While you were talking!
ROSS: You're joking, right? You guys just walked through the door.