words in movies
[Cut to Ross's apartment. Ross and Rachel are there. It's another scene from 1016 TOW Rachel's Going Away Party.]
[Scene: The delivery room at the hospital. Monica, Chandler and Erica are there. Erica is in labor, and she is breathing heavily.]
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Joey is there as Phoebe enters. Joey is holding a baby duck.]
Joey: Yeah. It's a shame people can't visit there.
Phoebe: Oh, this is like the best day ever. Ever! You guys might get back together, Monica and Chandler are getting their baby, there are chicks and ducks in the world again! Oh, I feel like I'm in a musical! (Singing) "Daa - raa... When the sun comes up, bright and beaming! And the moon comes..."
[Scene: The Hospital. Erica is moaning and about to give birth. Monica, Chandler, a nurse and a doctor are there with her.]
Monica: That doesn't matter! We have waited so long for this. I don't care if it's two babies. I don't care if it's three babies! I don't care if the entire cast of "Eight is Enough" comes out of there! We are taking them home, because they are our children!
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross, Phoebe and Joey are there.]
(Ross walks up to Rachel, but Gunther gets there first.)
Monica: Do you think they recognize each other from in there?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Joey and Phoebe are there. There is a white crib decorated with balloons in the middle of the apartment. Also, there are boxes all over the apartment. Joey is working on something on the coffee table.]
(He holds up a white poster with huge red letters. It reads, "Welcome Home Baby." There is also a huge red stain on the left of the poster.)
Phoebe: No, you don't! She's going to Paris! She is going to meet somebody. Do you know how many hot guys there are in Paris? It's... It's a city of Gunthers!
Phoebe: Hey! What do you have there?
Monica: Call us when you get there.
Rachel: Alright, now I really have to go. Okay. Au revoir! Oh, they're gonna really hate me over there.
[Scene: The street right in front of Central Perk. Phoebe's cab is there. Ross and Phoebe run over and jump in.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica, Chandler and Joey are there, packing the last boxes.]
Phoebe: (screaming) Toll-booth! Four bucks. There are quarters in the glove compartment.
Joey: We gotta get them out of there!
Joey: All right, you know what? We don't have a choice. It's like I would have said in that sci-fi movie if I'd gotten the part. "Those are our men in there, we have to get them out! Even if I have to sacrifice the most important thing in my life; my time-machine."
(She runs up to the gate and the gate attendant standing there.)
Joey: (yelling) Don't worry, you guys, we're gonna get you out of there.
Rachel: Oh, that was just my crazy friend. She told me I should get off the plane, because she had a feeling that there was something wrong with the left Philange.
Air stewardess: There is no Philange!
Passenger #1: We're all getting off. There is no Philange!
Chandler: I think there may be another reason. So, awkward hug or lame cool guy handshake?
Phoebe: There she is!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Joey, Chandler, Monica and the twins are there. Everything has been put into boxes.]
Rachel: (on the answering machine) Ross, hi. It's me. I just got back on the plane. And I just feel awful. That is so not how I wanted things to end with us. It's just that I wasn't expecting to see you, and all of a sudden you're there and saying these things... And... And now I'm just sitting here and thinking of all the stuff I should have said, and I didn't. I mean, I didn't even get to tell you that I love you too. Because of course I do. I love you. I love you. I love you. What am I doing? I love you! Oh, I've gotta see you. I've gotta get off this plane.
Rachel: (on the answering machine) Oh, come on, miss, isn't there any way that you can just let me off...
Joey: I am so-so-so sorry. I was gonna do it! Really! But I was standing there with 327 dollars in one hand and 238 dollars in the other hand, and I was thinking, "Wow! Its been a long time since I had (tries to do the math in his head, but cant) 327 + 238 dollars!"
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel and Fake Monica are there.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is returning from shopping and Rachel is there.]
Rachel: I just never had a relationship with that kind of passion, you know, where you have to have somebody right there, in the middle of a theme park.
Lydia: There is no father.
Charlie: (smiling and thinks for a moment)... no... bu but there was my first boyfriend Billy.
Joey: Alright, well the rest of you get comfortable, ok, because we're gonna be here for a li...(stops and thinks) Wait a minute, there is a window in there!
Rachel: Oh oh oh, wait! You only got whipped cream in there! Ya gotta take a bite with all the layers!
Mike: Uhm, did you guys know that there is a giant ice sculpture in the hall?
Ross: Y'know, we work in a museum of natural history, and yet there is something unnatural about the way we eat lunch. Now, I look around this cafeteria, and yknow what I see, I see-I see division. Division, between people in white coats and people in blue blazers, and I ask myself, "My God why?!" Now, I say we shed these-these coats that separate us, and we get to know the people underneath. (He takes off his coat and throws it down.) Im Ross! Im divorced, and I have a kid!
Rachel: Yeah but yknow what they say Mon, "Theres no such thing as bad press."
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there as Joey enters.]
Ross: Phoebe, there is no secret. Okay? I didnt propose.
SUSAN: Yeah, a woman I went to college with just became the first female blacksmith down there.
Monica: We should get over there and see if she's okay. (switching places with Ross) Just one...second! Score! (Monica scores, high-fives with Ross) Game! Come on. (Monica and Phoebe leave)
GUNTHER: There you go.
Joey: Power saw kinda got away from me there.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, All are there except for Chandler.]
Ross: Yeah, but it didnt fit. Well, luckily theres a store here that has one left in her size, but Im the groom, Im not supposed to see the dress
Roger: You're so funny! He's really funny! I wouldn't wanna be there when when the laughter stops.
Laura: Is he alright out there by himself?
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler, Monica, Joey, and Phoebe are there.]
CHAN: What are you doing out there?
(The door opens, and there is Gladys, still in her frame though. Joey panics and moves frantically, screaming. Then there is laughing, and the painting is lowered. It was Rachel holding Gladys.)
Ross: Yeah, ooh yeah, I think there is one from batch 17 left, uh (Grabs a cookie and takes a big bite out of it and doesnt like it.) Its batch 16! 16 people! Get out of the way! (Gets up and runs for the bathroom.)
Mr. Geller: Look, there are people like Ross who need to shoot for the stars, with his museum, and his papers getting published. Other people are satisfied with staying where they are- I'm telling you, these are the people who never get cancer.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is entering without touching anything with his hands. Phoebe, Monica, and Rachel are there.]
Ross: Sorry! Sorry! Oh, (He sticks it under his shirt) there! (It's just there flashing through his shirt) Hey Gary, who am I? Phone home!
Phoebe: There we go.You know what, if we were in prison, you guys would be, like, my bitches.
Chandler: No! No-no-no-no-no-no. It sounds like they really need you down there.
Joey: Oh sure, right back there. (Points.)
Joey: Ah. Yeah. Well look, the thing is its the same day as my nieces christening and I really want my parents to be there in time to see me. Cause my parts just in the beginning Im not even in the rest of the showWedding!
Dr. Green: (on phone, not hearing her) theres gonna be a wedding! (Joey enters from his room and goes to get a beer from the fridge.) Thats unacceptable Rachel! What the hell does love have to do with it anyway?! There are more important things in a marriage other than love! (Joey hears something and looks around for the source.) constantly thinking about things! You have to think about the consequences of your decision. (Joey finds that the sound is coming from the phone and puts it to his ear.)
[Scene: Mr. Ratstatter's (RTST) office. Monica is there about a job.]
Phoebe: Oh no, the dog's not going to be there!
Ross: Oh, you uh, you wanna hear a freaky coincidence? Guess who's doing laundry there too?
Ross: Okay, there was some staring and pointing.
Ross: Oh sure, come here! (Sits her up) Sure you can! Uh, look come here look, (rolls the machine closer) its-its-its, its right there (Points).
Monica: (on phone, faking she's sick) I-I'm not gonna be able to make it into work today, I don't feel very good. (Joey makes a high throw and Monica has to catch it way over her head.) (Not sounding sick) Yes!! (Realizes what she just did.) (Sounding sick again) Wow! Uh, for a second there I thought I was really better, but I'm not. (Hangs up and keeps throwing the ball.)
Joey: Ms. Monroe (She slaps him) Oh there you go. (She storms off, leaving Joey standing next to Dina. They share a nod at the ferocity of the slap they just received.)
ROSS: Ok, here, here. There we go.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Ross, and Monica are all there as Chandler enters wearing glasses.]
Ross: Wait-wait. I, I got it. I was there.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is there as Jill enters to start her date with Ross.]
Rachel: Yes, I know that. I know that. And I know that hiring him was probably not the smartest thing that Ive ever done. But Im telling you, from this moment on I swear this is strictly professional. (Theres a knock on the door.) Yes?
Mrs. Geller: Theres nothing to discuss. Were not paying for your wine cellar.
Barry: We can, we can go to Aruba! When I went there on what would have been our honeymoon, it was, uh... it was really nice. You would've liked it.
Chandler: Oh, come on! Its not like this is an everyday occurrence for me! I mean usually Im pretty much just in there by myself.
Monica: No, look, she's obviously unstable, okay? I mean she's thinking about running out on her wedding day. (Rachel slowly turns and glares at her.) (Realizing what she just said.) Okay, fine! But I mean, look at the position she's putting him in! What's he gonna do? Ross is gonna run over there on the wedding day and break up the marriage?! I mean, who would do that?! (Rachel again turns and glares at her in disgust.) Okay, fine, all right, but that's y'know, it's different! Although it did involve a lot of the same people.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler, Rachel, and Joey are there as Ross enters.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joeys, there is lumber all over the apartment]
Monica: Theres a dude?
PHOEBE: No, huh uh, I'm sorry, no. No, I'm not some like sloppy second, charity band. You know what, there are thousands of places in this city where people would be happy to pay to hear me play. (Out on the sidewalk, singing) When I play, I play for me, I don't need your charity. (Someone puts a coin in her guitar case) Thank you! La la la la la la la....
Joey: Yeah, you shoulda been there last night.
MONICA: Ross, there he is.
RACHEL: Well, people missed you in there. And in fact, there was actually a request for "Smelly Cat".
Phoebe: All right, there are no questions in the happy place. Okay, just, the warm breeze, and the moonlight flowing through the trees....
Rachel: Hi. (He helps her up.) Umm, I think theres something that we really need to talk about.
Ross: Well, there is an Arbys in the shape of a tee-pee.
Monica: Now there you go! I wouldnt want my best guest to strain her eyes!
Joey: (scores) Yes! I win again! Ha-ha! Thats like 500 bucks you owe me! Whoo-ho-hoo! (Goes over to the fridge and starts opening and closing the door rapidly.) $500 that is a loooot of electricity! (By the way, theres nothing in the fridge.) Whoo-ho-ho! (Notices the sparseness of the fridge.) I gotta buy some food.
Rachel: Oh my god. Ok you guys, theres Danny. Watch. Just watch this. (He walks past the couch to the counter.) See?! Still pretending hes not interested. Ohh, hes coming over. Just pretend like we dont know him. Weve forgotten who he is.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Joey are there.]
ROB: How did you know there was a but?
Joey: All right, well first of all I would like to say that you both performed very well. Okay? You should be proud of yourselves. And-and I would also like to say that in this competition there are no losers. Well, except for RachelDamnit!
RICHARD: I know, I know. Just hang in there, OK. OK, I'll go out first, alright.
PHOEBE: Hang in there, it's gonna happen.
Hums While He Pees: No its Uh, my ex-wife Whitney is out there. I cannot deal with her right now. That woman is crazy!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Only Chandler is there with the videotape in his hands, standing in front of the TV set.]
Joey: Whoa, hey, maybe I'll go down there with ya and see if I can get an audition to play the dad. I mean who better to play Ben's father than his godfather.
Joey: Hey, theres a dog out there!
Chandler: Theyre in my bag over there. (Points.)
Monica: Believe me, Chandler and I have not seen each other in over a week. We�ll probably be the first ones there.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, and Chandler are there. Monica is entering from her room.]
Chandler: Oh come on, it was so obvious! There was no chemistry between you two!
RACHEL: Ross, there is no us, OK.
Chandler: Richard was there so I couldnt do it!
(Theres a knock on the door.)
Ross: Oh, and also, hes, hes walkin kind of funny, his left leg is moving a lot faster than his right leg, and hes in there just sort of y'know... (walks around in a circle)
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Rachel are there, Joey enters wearing an old looking hat.]
Ross: And thats Phoebe over there! (Points to her.)
Ross: Come on, come on. Damnit, damnit, damnit, damnit. (to Susan) This is all your fault. This is supposed to be, like, the greatest day of my life, y'know? My son is being born, and I should be in there, you know, instead of stuck in a closet with you.
Ross: (to the girl sitting next to him) Hi there. How many, how many ah, did you sell?
MONICA: You've got to get back out there, it's your party.
[Scene: Cole-Geddes Casting Agency, Joey is there on his audition and thinking about that 2,000 bucks for the twins study.]
Jessica Lockhart: Oh yes there is!
[Scene: Mr. Ratstatter's office. Monica is there.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers apartment, Chandler and Rachel are there, and Phoebe enters with the Chick and the Duck.]
Ross: They gave him a lot of medication, ok? He wouldn't even know if you were there. Look, we'll go see him first thing in the morning, ok?
Ross: (picking up the slip of paper) Hello! What's this? Oh right its that girl's phone number. (Rachel ignores him) Yeah-yeah, there it is, just a phone number a really hot girl gave me. (He holds it so that Rachel can see it, she continues to ignore him) It's no big deal, I mean it is her home phone number, but...(Rachel still ignores him) Whoa! (Throws it in her lap) Whoa-whoops, I almost lost this baby! Yeah, the lovely Amanda gives me her number and I-I go and drop it. (He waves it in front of Rachel's face. Then suddenly Phoebe has to sneeze and Rachel quickly grabs the slip of paper and gives it to Phoebe for her to sneeze into.)
CHANDLER: Well, there you go.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Phoebe, Ross, Joey, and Rachel are there, Joey is demonstrating a card trick.]
Chandler: (peeping) They're out there!
CHANDLER: So whaddya got there Monica?
Monica: Well, theres a lot to think about. I mean, how is she, how is she going to handle this financially? How is she going to juggle work? Does she realize shes not going to have a date again for the next eighteen years?
MONICA: Hey there.
[Scene: A Dry Cleaners, Joey is there with Phoebe and is trying to get his picture put back amongst the other celebrities hanging on the walls.]
Chandler: Hey! (Sees Ross is there) Oh, good, Ross! Youre parents like me, right?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Monica are there.]
Rachel: Let me uh, let me ask you something, do wedding vows mean squat to you people?! And why is it that the second we tell you were going out of town, bamn there you are in bed with the neighbors dog walker?!