words in movies
NOTE: For this episode, I'm using italics to signify portions contained in the prom video.
CHANDLER: What's this?
CHANDLER: Well, I don't know what Big Leon told ya but it's an even thousand if you want me for the whole night. What is this for?
JOEY: Well, I'm makin money now and this is payin' you back for head shots, electric bills, and so many slices of pizza I can't even count. I love ya man.
JOEY: Hey, this is a little extra somethin' for uh, ya know, always bein' there for me. [hands Chandler a jewelry box]
CHANDLER: Oh, now? [puts it in his desk drawer] No, no, I think something this nice should be saved for a special occasion. [sets a chair in front of the drawer]
JOEY: Oh, no no, that's the beauty part, it goes with everything. [gets the bracelet from the drawer] You put this on, you're good to go. [puts the bracelet on Chandler] Ohhh man, you are so wearin' that bracelet.
INTERVIEWER: Well, this all looks good.
ROSS: Y-ello. No, Rachel's not here right now, can I take a message? Alright, and how do we spell Casey, is it like at the bat or and the Sunshine Band? OK, bye-bye. Hey, who's this uh, this Casey?
ROSS: [puts the message in the cupboard] I don't know, I don't get, I don't get it, I mean, wh, wh, two months ago Rachel and I were like, this close. Right now, what, I'm takin messages from guys she, she meets at the movies? I mean this, this Casey should be takin' down my messages, ya know, or, or, Rachel and I should be together and, and we should get some kind of me, message service.
MONICA: So, what's this.
PHOEBE: OK. Ooh, OK, you gotta give me a second, I wanna get this just right. [she sticks out her gut, clears her throat and sniffs her nose and then in her best male voice. . .] Dude, 11 o'clock, totally hot babe checkin' you out. That was really good, I think I'm ready for my penis now.
CHANDLER: What? [realizes it was the bracelet] Oh this is excellent. You know he coulda gotten me a VCR, he coulda gotten me a set of golf clubs, but no, he has to get me the woman repeller, the eyesore from the Liberace house of crap.
ROSS: Oh, oh my God, is this the wrong day? I don't believe it, uh, well, hey, I guess if it works out we'll, we'll have something to tell the grandkids.
MONICA: Um, yeah, so uh, uhh, listen, I'm sorry I didn't tell you this before but umm, I, I'm no longer at my job, I, I had to leave it.
MR. GELLER: Judy, Judy, relax, this is our little harmonica we're talking about. We taught her well. Ten percent of your paycheck, where does it go?
CHANDLER: Well this one's for you.
CHANDLER: No, I can't. No no, listen, I, I know how much this means to you and I also know that this is about more than just jewelry, [puts bracelet on Joey] it's about you and me and the fact that we're [reading bracelet] best buds.
JOEY: Wow, is this friendship? I think so. Check it out, we're bracelet buddies.
PHOEBE: [Standing in living room with Chandler and Joey. She pulls a huge bathing suit out of a box] Hey, Mon, what is this?
JOEY: [pulls out a VCR tape] Hey Monica, what's on this video tape?
MRS. GELLER: Over here Jack. OK. I see, Rachel's coming up the path. Oh doesn't she look pretty. Jack, get this. [Rachel enters with a huge nose]
MONICA: You know what this is, this is us getting ready for the prom.
ROSS: You know what, you guys, we don't have to watch this.
RACHEL: Oh, thanks. So, uh, what are you gonna do this summer?
ROSS: this summer?
RACHEL: I can't believe I don't get to go to my own prom, this is so harsh.
MRS. GELLER: Oh, dear. Jack, how do I turn this off?
Monica: I cant believe this. Do you think that your parents could help pay for it?
Gene: You put this on a sandwich.
Ross: Look, you can't do this Mon. All right, if you do this, I'm, I'm gonna, I'm, I'm gonna.....
Phoebe: We were at the game, and this guy proposed to his girlfriend on the big screen thing...
Rachel: (stopping him) Wh-whoa! All right, okay-okay, I see, I see what's going on here! Now listen, look-look, I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong impression, but I am not some hussy who will just sleep around to get ahead! Now even though I (He tries to interrupt and tell her about the ink), hey-hey-hey, even though I kissed you, that does not give you the right to demand sex from me. I do not want, this job that bad. Good day, sir. (She storms out of his office.)
Ross: Uh well umm were just not in that place, yknow? But were very excited about this.
Rachel: Phoebe, come on can we finish this later? Cause I wanna go running before it gets dark. Oh! Why don't you come with me?!
Joey: Oh I like this place. And technically, technically Im not breaking any rules so I
Phoebe: Oh, well... 'cause.... you just... I don't like this question.
Pete: Well if youre asking me to quit, then youre asking me to be someone Im not. Ive got to do this.
Phoebe: No, no, no, I wouldnt do you myself, I mean that would be weird. Yeah, no, Ill get one of the other girls to do it. Oh, this will be so much fun! Hey! Are you excited?
MNCA: So, Mr. Rastatter, what exactly does this job entail? The ad wasn't too clear.
Joey: All right, turn around, I got to get a look at this thing.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's Apartment, everyone's there; Phoebe recites the last verse of a poem to Joey. This poem is known as "The Night Before Christmas" by Clement Clarke Moore, but it seems that it's rather "Account of a visit from St. Nicholas" by Henry Livingston.]
Phoebe: Oh, this ones for Chandler. Here.
CHANDLER: So um, how come you guys haven't talked about this before?
Ross: Nothing, ah there was this thing at the museum. Come on. (they go into her apartment) Easy.
Monica: This is so cool, maybe this is something you can do every week.
Rachel: Oh my God! You are giving this a lot of thought.
Chandler: Yeah but you dont need(Picks up something)What is this?
Rachel: Yes, and I know that youd say no if he asked you, but Im sorry; how great would you look walking down the aisle in this Donna Carin. (shows her the picture.)
Rachel: Why not? I dont want to do this alone! And hes such a sweet guy and he loves me so much.
MONICA: Wow, this really sucks.
Monica: You may be okay about getting hurt, but I am not okay with being the one who hurts you. Thats why I cant take this job.
Phoebe: Yeah... ooh... wow... Even started to think I'd never meet someone that, you know, I wanted to... do this with. Here you go. (Both Phoebe and Mike look really proud.)
Rachel: I mean what if this keeps happening? Y'know, they'll-they'll be outside smoking, making all the decisions and I'll just be up in my office breathing my stupid clean air, y'know? And then when the day comes when Kim wants to promote one of us, who do you think she's gonna pick? Me or Smokey Smokerson?
The Cute Guy: Wow! Uh, this is kind of embarrassing. I was actually coming over to talk to your friend.
Richard: I know this is crazy but am I too late?
Charlie: Oh my God, I completely forgot! (they laugh) Oh my God! I can't believe they let us back in this place! (they laugh more, and Ross start laughing too).
Phoebe: I cant believe this! How long as this been going on?
Joey: All right, I guess this will be fine.
Rachel: Then, we had this big, stupid fight, and I said I wanted to take a break, I dont want to take a break.
Ross: You weren't there! Okay, maybe this is something that I-I'm supposed to seize! Y'know?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's and Ross's, Chandler is entering and when he closes the door Joey pops his head out of the fort like before, but this time he's wearing a cowboy hat.]
Joey: Maybe this should be more of a quiet game.
Monica: Umm, this is going to be fun. Watch me freak out Chandler. Honey?
Ross: Oh, okay, yknow what this is? This is a difference of opinion. And when that happens in a marriage...
Joey: Oh my God, that's great! I'm smart!! No, no, I'm... (he uses the Thesaurus) "brainy, bright, clever", I love this thing! Look out ladies, Joey Tribbiani's got the whole package!!
MONICA: That's Great. You know we don't need to talk about this now. Really, I mean this is, is so way, way, way, in the future, I'm talkin' hovercrafts and apes taking over the planet.
Monica: This doesnt feel weird!
Phoebe: (to her date) Okay, and then this is the coffee house. This is where I play my music. (points to the stage)
Chandler: (looks around) Here just take this. (Hands her the sweater.)
Ross: How are we gonna decide who gets this?
RACHEL: How did this happen?
Joey: I dont know. I guess theres just always been this distance yknowI mean we both try to pretend its not there, but it is.
RACHEL: Daddy, daddy, you know what, I really wanna hear more about this, I really do, but I just have, I just have to do a, some stuff.
RACHEL: This is Joey, and Phoebe, and this is Chandler, and you remember Ross.
Monica: Ooh, and I can do this. (She kisses him on the cheek.)
Ross: Yeah, uh, uh, ok, there's this great rare bookstore on Madison Avenue. You know what? She loves architecture, you know what you should do? You should take a walk down fifth to the Saint Patrick's Cathedral and there there's this great little pastry shop that she'd love.
Rachel: No way. No way did you do this.
Monica: I know. How could we have let this happen?
Monica: Oh my God! YOU FORGOT THE PIES? Well, I cannot believe this. You force me to make dinner, then you're an hour late and you forget the one little thing that I asked you to do.
Mr. Geller: Kids, I spoke to a doctor and picked up this pamphlets on how to get pregnant. (He slides them under the door.)
RACHEL: It's just this thing. Every year we would go out on my dad's boat and watch the fireworks. Mom always hated it because the ocean air made her hair all big. My sister Jill would be throwing up over the side and my dad would be upset becasue nobody was helping and then when we did help he would scream at us for doing it wrong. But then when the fireworks started, everybody just shut up, you know, and it'd get really cold, and we would all just sort of smush under this one blanket. It never occured to anybody to bring another one. And now it's just...
LITTLE BULLY: Actually, you know, uh, I gotta show this apartment tomorrow and uh, you know, this no faces thing might not be a bad idea.
Kathy: Yes! Yeah! Joey has great hair! Umm, Im basically done here. Just let me get this off your neck.
Chandler: (smiling) If we keep talking this way, aren't we gonna freak her out soon?
Monica: Hi, come in! Paul, this is.. (They are all lined up next to the door.)... everybody, everybody, this is Paul.
Ross: Huh? Oh, I got this(Holds up this pink frilly thing)this!
Joey: Uh! That's a tough one. Oh! Wait a minute, this happened to me before! Yeah, I was auditioning for a play and the producer fell asleep and... (pause) no wait a minute... it was me who fell asleep... Yeah I mean hey, Shakespeare, how about a chase scene once in a while!?
Cheryl: Okay, um, don't take this the wrong way, but your place kinda has a weird smell.
Chandler: Yknow uh, I didnt actually do this.
Joey: Pheebs, you gotta stop this, I working on commission here.
Ross: (to Rachel) So, hes just a nice guy. You really think this Mark doesnt want anything in exchange for helping him?
Joey: (picking up a leftover part) What's this?
Rachel: And everybody knows this?
Chandler: This is terrible. What am I going to do?
Monica: Okay. (They kiss.) Okay, I cant wait! This is going to be the best Valentines Day ever! (Chandler giggles and exits.) I cant believe it! Make the presents! Make the presents!
Kathy's Co-Star: Sooo, youve been doing this long?
Ross: What is this?!
Joey: Yes! Yes!! And every time you look at it, I want you to remember that you are a good person. Okay, youve had the chance to cheat, and with me, but you didnt. And thats what this ring stands for.
Rachel: Cmon, seriously, you guys, youre not going to make me watch this alone!
Rachel: Wow! This is great! Look at all these cups! This is so weird.
Rachel: What bank is this?
Mike: Yeah, I understand, but before you do, she really needs to hear this.
Monica: Hi. Alan, this is everybody. Everybody, this is Alan.
Monica: I can't believe this! This is like the worst night ever!
[Scene: The apartment in the listing, the guys are checking it out. There's one problem though, it's roughly the size of this computer screen. As they enter Joey lets out a whistle.]
Rachel: Joey, is this that thing that you do when you say you're bad so I'll give you a compliment?
Rachel: Oh, you guys are gonna have so much fun! She's at such a cute age. Oh, a couple things. Now that she's eating solid food, she poops around the clock. And watch out for your hair, 'cause she likes to grab it. And oh, she's also in this phase where if you leave the room, she screams bloody murder, but ah... Thanks, you guys. Have fun!
Chandler: Hey, this is so unfair!
Chandler: (entering with Rachel) Im telling ya, Joannas got it all wrong. Okay? All I said was, This was fun. Lets do it again sometime. Ill give you a call.
Monica: Y'know what? After you're with this woman for like ten minutes, you forget all that. I mean, she is this astounding person, with this, with this amazing spirit.
Chandler: Oh, we could do this all day.
(She puts her leg up on the chair and removes this huge knife from her boot to open the box with. The guys are shocked at the knife's existence.)
Ross: Oh Im, Im making this too hard. Okay, what do you want me to do.
Kathy: Okay, so let me just get this straight. Youre accusing me of cheating on you, and insulting my performance?
Rachel: No! Yknow what? No! No! You thing was so stupid anyway, this was ridiculousWere gonna flip a coin! (Phoebe gasps.) All right?! (She flips the coin.) Heads! (Looks at the coin and grunts in disgust.)
Phoebe: (hopping off the bike) Wait! This seat is really uncomfortable! Yeah, maybe before we start we should just get another one. Perhaps, like an airplane seator a beanbag chair!
Joey: All right. Okay. Well this is the same kind of deal. If youre going to do something wrong, (He grabs two steaks from the freezer) do it right!
Richard: Well yeah, Im sorry. I know this is the wrong time and the wrong place but I had to tell ya! I wanna spend my life with you. I wanna marry you. I wanna have kids with you.
Erin: Hi. I dont mean this to sound like high school, but did he say anything about me?
Joey: (to Monica) Hey, how much will you give me to eat this whole jar of olives?
RACH: Ok, he's goin' to get my coat. He's goin' to get my coat. Oh my god, you guys. I can't believe this. This is unbelievable. [notices Chandler's computer screen] What's that?
Chandler: Im kidding. This is going to be fun.
(Seeing Rachels apparently okay with this, the rest of the gang jumps up to congratulate Ross and Emily on their pending nuptials.)
Monica: Ok, I'm sensing that this is some kind of word play, because you are pink with barely controlled glee.
Dr. Long: Huh. Nice to meet you. Ill get started on this.
[Scene: Back to the living room. Monica and Rachel enter and hug each other. The guys see this.]
Monica: This is crazy! I mean, it's such a stupid argument. I don't even wanna see Richard again.