words in movies
Rachel: Everybody? Shh, shhh. Uhhh... Central Perk is proud to present the music of Miss Phoebe Buffay.
Phoebe: Hi. Um, I want to start with a song thats about that moment when you suddenly realize what life is all about. OK, here we go. (plays a chord, then the lights go out) OK, thank you very much.
Phoebe: Can I borrow the phone? I want to call my apartment and check on my grandma. (to Monica) What's my number?
Chandler: She's right, it's Jill. Jill Goodacre. Oh my God. I am trapped in an ATM vestibule with Jill Goodacre! (pause) Is it a vestibule? Maybe it's an atrium. Oh, yeah, that is the part to focus on, you idiot!
Rachel: That had to hurt!
(He continues to smile like an idiot, and she looks frightened.)
Jill: (awkwardly) Would you like to call somebody? (offering phone)
Chandler: Yeah, about 300 guys I went to high school with. Yeah, thanks. (takes phone)
Monica: (to everyone) It's Chandler! (on phone) Are you OK?
Chandler: Yeah, I'm fine. (trying to cover up what he is saying) I'm trppd in an ATM vstbl wth Jll Gdcr.
Joey: (to everyone) Oh my God! He's trapped in an ATM vestibule with Jill Goodacre! (on phone) Chandler, listen. (says something intentionally garbled)
Joey: OK... my weirdest place would have to be... the women's room on the second floor of the New York CIty public library.
Ross: The ride broke down. So, Carol and I went behind a couple of those mechanical Dutch children... then they fixed the ride, and we were asked never to return to the Magic Kingdom.
Rachel: Oh, alright. The weirdest place would have to be... (sigh)... oh, the foot of the bed.
Rachel: I just never had a relationship with that kind of passion, you know, where you have to have somebody right there, in the middle of a theme park.
Ross: Well, it was the only thing to do there that didn't have a line.
Ross: But, um... I don't think that's going to be you.
Joey: Because you waited too long to make your move, and now you're in the friend zone.
Ross: I'm taking my time, alright? I'm laying the groundwork. Yeah. I mean, every day I get just a little bit closer to...
Joey: Priesthood! Look Ross, I'm telling you, she has no idea what you're thinking. If you don't ask her out soon you're going to end up stuck in the zone forever.
Joey: Yeeeeaaaahhh! What's messing you up? The wine? The candles? The moonlight? You've just got to go up to her and say, 'Rachel, I think that...' (Rachel comes into the room behind them)
Ross: We're shushing... because... we're trying to hear something. Listen. (everyone is silent) Don't you hear that?
Phoebe: (singing) New York City has no power, and the milk is getting sour. But to me it is not scary, 'cause I stay away from dairy.... la la la, la la, la la... (she writes the lyrics down)
Ross: (to Joey) OK, here goes.
Joey: Are you going to do it?
Ross: I'm going to do it.
Joey: OK. (Ross goes out on the balcony to talk to Rachel)
(Monica walks in, starts to go out on the balcony.)
Joey: OK, you've got to promise that you'll never, ever tell Ross that I told you.
Phoebe: This is so typical. I'm always the last one to know everything.
Phoebe: Yuh-huh! I was the last one to know when Chandler got bitten by the peacock at the zoo. I was the last one to know when you had a crush on Joey when he was moving in. (Monica gestures at Phoebe to shut up; Joey looks surprised but pleased) Looks like I was second to last.
Ross: OK. Here goes. For a while now, I've been wanting to, um....
[Cut to inside. Monica, Joey and Phoebe are singing while outside, Ross and Rachel are trying to get the cat off of Ross' shoulder.]
Monica: (to Ross) This is just Bactine. It won't hurt.
Phoebe: Oh, poor little Tooty is scared to death. We should find his owner.
[Scene: The hallway of Monica's building. Phoebe and Rachel are trying to find the cat's owner.]
Phoebe: (trying to hold back the struggling cat) He seems to hate you. Are you sure?
[Scene: Rachel has gone off on her own to look for the cat's owner.]
Rachel: (entering with Paolo, arm in arm) Everybody, this is Paolo. Paolo, I want you to meet my friends. This is Monica.
Rachel: Well, the cat... the cat turned out to be Paolo's cat!
Ross: That, that is funny... (to Joey).... and Rachel keeps touching him.
Phoebe: Ah! Well! There you go! Last to know again! And I'm guessing... since nobody told me... this is Paolo.
Paolo: (something in Italian, he is apparently attracted to Phoebe)
(Chandler waits until Jill is looking, then starts to blow a bubble. But instead of blow one, he accidentally spits the gum out of his mouth and hits the wall.)
Chandler: Nice going, imp. OK, it's OK. All I need to do is reach over and put it in my mouth. (Chandler slyly grabs the gum from the wall and slides it back in his mouth.)
(Chandler starts to choke.)
(Chandler tries to save face and makes the 'OK' sign with his hands, while obviously unable to breathe.)
Rachel: (to Monica and Phoebe) Oh my God, you guys, what am I doing? What am I doing? This is so un-me!
Phoebe: I know, I just want to bite his bottom lip. (Rachel looks at her) But I won't.
[Cut to the other side of the apartment, Ross has gone over to straighten things out with Paolo.]
[Scene: ATM vestibule, Chandler and Jill are sitting below the counter with two pens dangling from their chains in front of them. Jill is showing Chandler how to swing the pen around his head.]
(Chandler tries to do the same thing but the pen hits him in the head.)
Jill: No, you've got to whip it.
Phoebe: Oh, look look look. The last candle's about to burn out. 10, 9, 8, 7... (time lapse)... negative 46, negative 47, negative 48.... (someone blows it out, the room gets completely dark)
(Everyone starts to imitate him.)
Joey: Hey Ross. This probably isn't the best time to bring it up, but you have to throw a party for Monica.
(She leaves. Chandler presses his face to the glass door after her, stroking the window lovingly. He then turns to the security camera and starts talking to it.)
(Monica gets behind him and in combination with his sliding the chair forward and her pushing with her leg manages to get up to the table.)
Elizabeth: Do you not want to be seen with me?
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Listen umm, yeah okay, I need to talk to you!
Phoebe: Nothing! You have apologized to her like a million times and shes been nothing but terrible to you. And dont forget you just threw her daughter a lovely, albeit slightly boring, shower, and she hasnt even thanked you for it.
[Cut back to the present.]
Rachel: Oh! I used to do that too!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is holding a football helmet; and apparently, in a rather disgusting scene, Joey wants Phoebe to beat him senseless. (Luckily it isnt a long trip.) Because hes made a miraculous recovery from his hernia and wants to take advantage of all those free surgeries he can get now since hes re-established his health insurance.]
Ross: Oh, whatever. (Laughs and gives Joey the thumbs up heading back to his apartment. Joey follows him)
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, Phoebe is talking. It looks like when Rachel and Monica lived in this apartment.]
MR. GREENE: I have to be heading to my chateau, thank you.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's hotel room, Rachel is still trying to get the ink off and Ross is on the phone to the company. Wait a minute, why exactly are they sharing a hotel room? Didn't they like break-up or something? Did I miss a memo? Or maybe, it's just foreshadowing things to come. Who knows? Maybe the answer's at the bottom of the page. Then again, maybe it isn't and it's just one of those things TV writers just don't explain. Anyhoo ]
Joey: Okay, look, I think we have to tell Rachel she messed up her dessert.
Chandler: Yeah, I wanna go to babe.
Chandler: I don't get it neither, I mean you're obviously desperate, you're asking women how they want to be killed
Richard: Yeah! Youre saying, you need to be with someone more mature. Maybe someone with, a license to practice medicine. Or a mustache.
(They leave on the tour and Rachel goes to follow them but Phoebe stops her and drags her into the kitchen.)
Monica: (To Chandler) Do you want our guy to be your guy?
Phoebe: (reading from the instructions) After applying the Waxine and linen strips to leg number one,
(In the apartment below, Mr.Heckles is trying to relax and read his newspaper, but Rachel is helplessly dangling upside-down with her ankle wrapped up in the Christmas lights.)
David: Okay, what the hell, what the hell. (Sweeps the remaining papers off the desk and grabs Phoebe) You want me to actually throw you or you-you wanna just hop?
Ross: (His voice is altered to sound like a computer.) Electrifying. (He plays the sound of a ticking clock.) Emphatic time-time-time
Monica: It is so great to meet a guy who is smart and funny, and has an emotional age beyond, like eight.
Guy: Would you like to go out and have a cup of coffee?
Ross: I just wanna say good-bye to you guys and to see if you guys will place a little bet for me, huh? Twenty bucks on black 15.
MNCA: [to Chandler] Yo, Bing. Racquetball in 15 minutes.
Rachel: Well, someone that has his own tux, or has the ability to rent a tux.
Amy: No, she was this really dorky girl in high school that used to follow Rachel around like a puppy dog.
Chandler: Because hes crazy. Okay? He came up to me earlier and thanked me for my very moving performance in Titanic.
Mrs. Green: Plus, what are you planning on doing with the baby while youre trotting out to the garbage ten times a day?
Monica: Oh, it was awful. (To Chandler) I guess some people just don't appreciate really good food.
Rachel: (pause) Hes talking to the baby.
Joey: Look, Ill come to the party but Im not dressing up.
Ross: Well, ok, it's for 25 thousand dollars. And if I get it, I'll finally be able to complete my field research! And there will be an article about me in the "Paleontology Review"! Yeah! That'll be the first time my name is in there, without people raising serious questions about my work!
Monica: Yeah Joey shes Rachels got this really big work problem, and it is a head scratcher. Wow! (To Chandler) Yknow what, if were gonna make dinner were gonna have to leave. Yeah. (She and Chandler exit.)
Ross: No! Okay, you mean, you're not gonna talk to her, you're not gonna tell her how you feel?
Rachel: Phoebe. We would like to talk to you for a second.
[cut back to the gang.]
Monica: (to the bartender) Thank you.
Monica: Okay, but if we don't get this house, she's stil gonna show up wherever we go! I mean, at least if she's here, it eliminates the element of suprise. I mean, never again will you have to hear the three words that make your balls jump back up inside your body. (She shows this with her index finger, mimicking it pushing something up)
Mr. Waltham: (Shaking everyone's hand.) Hello. Hello. How do you do? How do you do? Very nice to meet you. (Looking over at his wife.) Darling its the Gellers. (She pays no attention shes talking on a cellular phone.) (Louder) Darling, its the Gellers. (Shes still not responding.) Shes very self-absorbed, you know. I should never have married her.
Gunther: But then I'd have to go all the way around the dry cleaner place.
Joey: Oh no, no-no-no-no! I don't want to know!
Ross: Thanks. (He starts to go inside and stops.) What photo album was it?
ROSS: [on the phone] Woah, woah, woah australopithicus isn't supposed to be in that display. No. No. No, n, homo-habilus was erect, australopithicus was never fully erect.
Rachel: Im Monicas maid of honor. Okay? Dont try to blue pin me!
Kara: Nice to meet you Monica. Bing! (Slaps Chandler on his butt.)
Monica: (starting to cry) Oh God!
Ross: Then what am I supposed to do?
Rachel: Excuse me, can I, can I bum one of those? (He holds up his pack.) Y'know what, actually (She takes the one he's smoking and heads over to where Nancy and Kim are standing and laughing.) Okay, okay, okay, what's so funny over here?
Chandler: No-no, why dont you hang on to that one.
Rachel: (to the closed door) Hang in there. You hang in there. (Gives him the raspberry.)
[Chandler exits to the balcony.]
Joey: Thats right, all the ladies want to stay at Joeys.
Phoebe: Then why did she ask us to
Joey: Come on Rach, not again. I got it! Okay? Lets start sailing, and I want to go over there (Points) where that boatload of girls is! (Yelling to them) Yo-ho-ho!
Rachel: (to Monica): Really? (out loud): Sure, we have scones left! (to Monica): OK, read them to me.
Chandler: So did Monica tell you about this great band called the Swing Kings that were trying to get to play at the wedding?
Phoebe: Great, all right, okay, and Monica ask me to make the drumming stop.
Joey: No youre not! Not to me!
Joey: Ahh, to be 13 again.
Ross: (holds up a hand) Little girl misses her cat. (hold up the other hand) Crazy lady thinks her mother is in a cat. (gets up) Okay, y'know what, I have to go have dinner with my son, can I trust that when you see Phoebe, you will tell her.
Monica: Thats right. Thats right. And that is why you cant stay here tonight. And probably why you shouldnt come to the wedding.
JOEY: All right look.� (He walks to the hallway.)� If you can't come home and deal with this, then I'm gonna.
Monica: (continuing) Now, most guys will hit uh, 1-2-3 and then go to 7 and set up camp.
Chandler: Oh thats so sweet! I want to show you something too!
Monica: I gave you one job! (Starts to examin the lasagne through the bottom of the glass pan.)
Charlie: So, you know... I have a little time. If you... if you want to...
Joey: Wow. Hey look, if it helps, I dont want to feel this way. Honest. I just keep thinking, "Ah, Ill get over this." Yknow? I justIt just keeps gettin harder. I dont, I dont know what to do. Yknow? What do I do?
Chandler: Do you want me to call?
(David puts his napkin up to his mouth and starts laughing at his own line. Matt notices him after a while and starts laughing as well.)
Mrs. Geller: Here, sweetie, here. I took these when I had my golfing accident. (Hands Ross a bottle of pills. Then turns to Monica and pats her hair over her ears)
Joey: (To Chandler) Iced tea.
Bonnie: I think I brought back half of the beach in my hair. It was so much easier when I used to shave my head.
Chandler: Pheebs! We have to take you to the hospital now!
[Scene: The couch store, Ross is talking to a saleswoman.]
Chandler: No! Uh, I d'know! The point is, if you were gonna set me up with someone, I'd like to think you'd set me up with someone like him.
Girl: We learned how to dance.
Interviewer: So, uh, what are you going to do next?
Monica: No, Ill do it. You just stick to your job.
Monica: (to Phoebe) Here you go. You can wear this. (hands her a sweater)
Chandler: Gap commercial. (To Monica) So did you book them? Did you call?
Joey: Oh, that sounds like fun, but weve got a ring to find!!
Guys: Hockey! (They go to leave but are blocked by three of Rachel's friends, Leslie, Kiki, and Joanne. The guys pause to stare at them.) Hockey! Hockey. (The guys.)
Elizabeth: Ahh, I just have one problem left that I do not know how to solve. Uhh, Rachel maybe you want to come upstairs and help me figure it out?
Phoebe: Well I want to get in on this. Hey Mon? I dont think I can help you after all, I didnt realize this game was on.
(They all run over to the window.)
Monica: Were supposed to meet my parents in 15 minutes.
(David and Phoebe sit down at a table close to Chandler and Monica's)
Monica's Boyfriend: (returning) Here we go, one Hazelnut Latte. (Hands it to Monica and sits down.)
Rachel: Hey, now wait a minute! I get when you told people at first that you wanted to be an actor they laughed at you! Now come on Bobby, why dont you tell us a little bit about your band?
Joey: When I'm with a woman, I need to know that I'm going out with more people than she is.
MONICA: Ya know what, I think I'm gonna go to my room and read Cosmo, maybe there's something helpful in there. Know what, at least maybe I can learn how to do an at home bikini wax with leftover Cristmas candles.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe enters to find Rachel still packing.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is introducing Julie to the gang.]
[Cut back to Joey and Rachels apartment.]
[Scene: The park, Rachel's running by herself and panting. After a little while she decides to run like Phoebe.]
Chandler: I know there'll be many moments in the years to come when I'll regret asking the following question, but- And Andrew is?
Monica: All right, I I have to ask.
ROSS: Are you trying to get me to bribe you?
[Cut back to the present.]