words in movies
Joey: Man, this is bad! And Ive had my share of bad reviews. I still remember my first good one though. (Quoting) "Everything else in this production of Our Town was simply terrible. Joey Tribbiani was abysmal."
Monica: You dont think that umm, (reading) "The chefs Mahi Mahi was awful awful," is bad press?
Monica: No. He teaches a course on food criticism at the New School, so before we go to the movies I wanna go by there and make him try my bouillabaisse again. Oh, I cannot wait to read the front page of the Post tomorrow! "Restaurant reviewer admits: I was wrong about Monica."
Ross: We are having a baby together, but were not involved. (The cashier, a very beautiful woman, looks confused) I mean, uh we-we were seeing each other a while ago, but then we were just friends. And then there was one drunken night. (Rachel looks at him angrily) Or, yes stranger, wed like this delivered please.
Rachel: Oh, it was great! We got everything that we needed! Oh and Ross, almost got something that wasnt on the list. A whore.
Rachel: You dont understand! You didnt see how brazen she was.
Phoebe: Yes, when I first met you, you were like, "Blah, blah, blah." I was like, shhh!
Ross: Ah, mustve been fairly obvious since it was the only thing left in your store.
Katie: Okay. It was nice to see you.
Rachel: Oh and it was great to see you too. And you look fantastic, although you missed a button.
Monica: I-I-Im sorry, your-your mouth was full, I didnt hear what you said. Umm, hats off to who now?
Chandler: also I was the point person on my companys transition from the KL-5 to GR-6 system.
Chandler: Yeah I gotta say thank you, I was really nervous. Yknow Ive been told I come on to strong, make to many jokes, and then it was really hard to sidestep that duty thing. (The interviewer doesnt understand) Duties. (Still doesnt.) Duties! (Still doesnt.) Poo. (Still doesnt.)
Chandler: Oh my God this doesnt count! Okay? The interview was over, that was the real Chandler Bing in there, this is just some crazy guy out in the hall! Call security! Theres a crazy guy out in the hall!
Rachel: Im fine, but thats not important. Whats important is how was she?
Ross: Uhh, it was fun. We, we just had coffee.
Rachel: No! No, shesShe was nice. I mean, shes a little slutty, but who isnt?
Ross: Why? What was wrong with her?
Rachel: There was nothing wrong with her! All right? She was perfectly lovely!
Ross: Oh-oh, Rach! I was just messin around! (Shes stunned) Like you did last night when I had to pee?
Rachel: (laughs) I knew that! I knew that! I was just messin with you too!
Joey: Yeah, this was a stupid idea. (Exits.)
Earl: I thought it was toner.
Steve: I was just being polite, but, alright.
MONICA: Oh my God, it was incredible.
Phoebe: I had a great time. (accent) It was really top drawer. And here's something rich: thirteen bathrooms in this place... I threw up in the coat closet... Ta taaa...
Chandler: Did I? Let's refresh. I believe what I said was that I could see your scalp.
Phoebe: Oh... Mike's sister just invited me to a party tonight, he's gonna be there. And she was like "Oh, don't worry! I asked him. He's totally ok with seeing you!". So now I have to go so he'll think that I'm totally ok with seeing him!
Rachel: Come on Ross! You said you wanted to talk about it, lets talk about it!! How was she?
Janine: Well I did. I really did. And you guys, Ive got to say, Im sorry if I was a little weird after the last time we went out. I guess I was just nervous or something.
Ross: Oh, is it? Is it? Look, when Monica and I were kids, we had a dog named Rover. And, uh, one day, my dad decides, he doesn't like dogs. So Monica and her friend Phyllis take away the dog. And that was the last time we ever saw him. Don't you see? This is just like that. Only with a few details changed.
Monica: Y'know which one was she again?
Joey: (laughs that one off) Yeah. So uh Ross, well nowwhy did that first marriage breakup? Was it because the woman was straight or she was a lesbian?
Ross: Shut up! It was nice. I just... I don't think I'm the dirty-talking kind of guy, you know?
Ross: Yeah, I was going for the metaphor.
Chandler: No! No! No! I was so careful! (Runs out.)
Chandler: Youre right, I have no excuses! I was totally over the line.
Rachel: Shes totally right! When we were together, you got all freaked out about Mark and there was nothing going on.
Joey: Thats right! I helped you guys out a lot in the start of your relationship. Huh? I helped you guys sneak around for like six months, and I looked like an idiot! And I was humiliated. And I only made 200 dollars!
Joey: Come on! Admit it! That was the best nap you ever had!
The Hot Girl: No, I-I actually thought it was unfair the way everyone reacted. I mean you had just moved in.
Bonnie: All right, I was 15, it was my best friend, Ruth, and we got drunk on that hard cider, and then suddenly, I dont know, we were, we were making out.
Chandler: (Looking down at her hand) Yes, yes I am. Err, listen, the reason that I called you in here today was, err... please dont hate me.
RACHEL: I, I don't know, um, do you think you're cute? OK, we're kinda gettin' off the track here. Um, I was supposed to come here and tell you my friend thinks you're cute. So what should I tell her?
Chandler: Hey, how was your breakfast with Hillary?
Rachel: Whoa!! Whoa, whoa, wait a minute. What time did your little friend leave? (Ross cant answer that) Oh my God. She was there? She was still there? She was in there, when I was in there?!
Joey: Well check it out, I was with this really hot girl who just moved in right across the street!
Rachel: Well, ultimately, I was trying y'know, I-I wanted tell him y'know, that I'm still in love with him.
ROSS: Well, this was fun. Uh, we should really do it again sometime, wha'dya say? Ok. Alright so I've got him.
MONICA: Oh I was just doing Chandler's side of the conversation.� You know, like, "Hi, How do I look?"� (As Chandler) "Really sexy.� Could I BE any more turned on?"
Joey: Somebody was using his head. Hey, let's check out the rest of the place.
Rachel: Hi! I just want to apologize. Im really sorry I was a baby.
Joanna: Oh God, we just clicked! Yknow how people just click? Like he came by to pick me up, and I opened the door, and it was just like, click! Did he tell you?
Ross: He was roommates with John Rosoff. He went out with Andrea Tamburino. She dumped him for Michael Skloff.
Ross: Well maybe she wouldnt have to be selfish in bed if someone else knew where everything was!
Rachel: (We see a flashback as Rachel describes what happened.) All right, we were shaking hands and he kinda leaned toward me Y'know maybe he was going to open the door, but I totally miss read him and I uhhh (The flashback shows that she kissed him on the cheek.)
Rachel: Hi! Oh, how was your date last night?
Joey: No! No, that was Jack! Rachel thinks I asked her to marry me!
Chandler: I might have checked to see if I was ovulating a couple times.
Phoebe: I thought you were excellent! In fact for a minute there I was like, "Ooh, whered Ross go?"
Chandler: Well, my Grandfather was Swedish and my Grandmother was actually a tiny little bunny.
Monica: I know! It's just that ever since high school Rachel was the one person I told everything too. Y'know? I miss that so much now. She's my best friend.
Monica: What was it for?
Rachel: Well I was gonna tell him that Im-Im gonna have the baby and he can be as involved as he wants.
Ross: I was working late in the library one afternoon. It was just the two of us. She needed some help with her word jumble. And one thing led to another. If you must know, Anita was very gentle and tender. May she rest in peace
Chandler: You're right, I'm sorry. (Burst into song and dances out of the door.) "Once I was a wooden boy, a little wooden boy..."
Ross: (on phone) No-no-no, thats great! Ill be there Monday. And thank you again! (Listens) Okay. (Hangs up) (To All) Umm, that was the head of the Paleontology department at N uh, Y, uh U!
Monica: Mom, uh, Chandler was just saying how beautiful your sweater is.
Gunther: Maybe nobody won the jackpot, but there was this guy in here earlier, and he found the ticket on the street, right outside, and won $10,000 (goes to the counter).
Ross: The Armadillo was actually not so thrilled about that part! Okay Ben, its time to light the Hanukkah candles! (Santa, Superman, Monica, Ben, and the Holiday Armadillo go over to the menorah to light the candles.)
Rachel: Ah! Well it was Joey reading Drake's lines in the dream...
Chandler: That was pretty 007.
Joey: Rachel, would you stop saying that?! Hey-hey look, remember on the show when-when Caprice was dying and she gave me
Ross: Hey Pheebs, what-what was the deal with you and Chandler blowing us off before?
Rachel: What the hell was that?!
Rachel: Wow! I mean I had no idea that that was gonna
Phoebe: I am one of Bens mothers. Im a lesbian. It was, it was difficult coming out to my parents.
Chandler: Well, what if all my stuff was here?
Chandler: All right, think about it. Now remember when you were going out with that girl Donna and you guys broke up. Remember how horrible it was when you guys bumped into each other at the supermarket?
Rachel: (she leans over and kisses him on the cheek) Honey, I was wondering....
Chandler: It's a tradition, like the parade. If the parade decided it was gay, moved out, and abandoned its entire family.
Joey: Why would they do that?! It was a good show right?!
Rachel: (really excited) Great!! It was very, very nice to meet you sir--Ow! Hey! What are you doing?! Are you crazy! (He took out that thing they use to look at people's retinas and looked at Rachel's when she was shaking his hand causing her to flinch and scream at him.)
The Director: Cut! That was great everybody! Thank you!
JOEY: Seriously, you like it? This guy was sellin' them on 8th avenue and I looked at 'em and I though, you know what I don't have?
RACHEL: No, that was his costume. See, he's actually an orthodontist, but he came as a regular dentist.
Chandler: Well, she walked in when I was looking at the ring brochures. You can understand that, right? (Ross and Joey look at each other and go back to watching the game on TV.) Guys? Guys? (Walks in front of them again.)
Eric: (To Phoebe) Well, it was nice meeting you.
Rachel: (not sure what to do) Uh, it was very nice meeting you. (They continue to ignore her.)
Rachel: Oh, please, Ross it was so obvious! It was like you were marking your territory. I mean you might have well have just come in and peed all around my desk!
Ross: About yesterday, I was really wrong. I am sorry.
Rachel: That was her idea, I just gave her a nudge.
Chandler: Oh, then no thanks. What the hell was that? Mental note: If Jill Goodacre offers you gum, you take it. If she offers you mangled animal carcass, you take it.
Rachel: Oh God! Yknow what I wish? I wish you were six years older. Well actually, if Im wishin for stuff, I actually wish I was six years younger.
Man: Well I actually, I-I really, I haven't seen her for years. But umm, well I-I was pretty tight with-with her and her daughter.
Monica: Wait a minute! So you told people I was pregnant?! (Flash) Does this look like a conversation that I want to remember?!
Chandler: That is funny. It was also funny when I made it up.
Phoebe: Oh, what was that for? Like a bake sale?
Mrs. Lynch: Well, she was leaving work and she was hit by a cab.
Policeman: Youre right. It was 37. (Rachel laughs.)
Ross: and it was Ernst Muhlbrat who first hypothesized that the Velociraptor would expand its collar and emit a high pitched noise to frighten its predator. (A student raises his hand.) Yes Mr. Lewis?
Joey: (To Chandler) I bet it was about her a little.
Chandler: Wow that was my scariest voice! Youre very brave.
Ross: Absolutely. (Very Squeaky.) I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, (deep voice) I'm fine. I'm not saying I wasn't a little surprised to see you guys kissing. I mean, at first I was like.. (Screams.) But now that I've had time to absorb it; Lovin' this.
Chandler: Well lets see, there was the guy with the ferrets, thats plural. The spitter. Oh-ho, and yes, the guy that enjoyed my name so much he felt the need to make a little noise every time he said it. Nice to meet you, Chandler Bing Bing! Great apartment Chandler Bing, Bing!
Monica: All you had to do was buy the card!
The Woman Dealer: I don't know about the hands, but the guy that was here before me just went to the bathroom.
Young Ethan: I am telling you, up until I was, like nine, I thought that gunpoint was an actual place where crimes happen.
Chandler: My favorite part was when Superman flew all the Jews out of Egypt. (Glaring at Joey whos nodding.)
Rachel: (in disbelief) You WHAT? And I missed it? Because I was giving a makeover to that stupid hippie?
Joey: Oh my God! Thats huge! (Hugs him.) Wait a minute, why come I wasnt invited? And who was going to be your best man? Dont say, "Ross." Do not say, "Ross."
Joey: I was just gonna call you! That’s weird.
Joey: Come on Treeger, dont say that. You just ahh, you just need more practice. Here, come on, lets ahh, lets try it again. Come on. (they start dancing again) Plus, it was, it was probably mostly my fault, anyway. I mean, yknow, Im not really that comfortable dancing with a(Treeger throws him) We-he!! Hey!
Ross: Yeah, yeah, I was watching. (The instructor just nods and walks away.) Umm, hey, a couple of questions though. Umm, about that-that-that last move where the woman tripped you and then pinned you to the floor, what-what-what-what would you do next?
Ursula: I dont know. He said he did all this stuff and then I said I did it too and he got so excited, it was really fun.
Joey: Oh, it was so amazing. After the (pause) love making...
Chandler: Oh, that was my work laugh.
Joey: Oh, very funny. I dont know if you remember, but my audition was supposed to be Thursday. (Chandler doesnt say anything until Joey figures it out.) You got me the audition?! Lets hug it up! (They hug.)
Rachel: Well, it was just something Josh said about v-necks, but you had to be there.
Phoebe: It's a tarantula! (Joey almost falls down from his drum-stool jumping up) Oh! God! Rachel, look, I'm sorry. What was I thinking giving Joey this big, gross, scary spider in such a poorly constructed cage?
Ross: You know what, its, its better this way anyway. I mean I dont know what I was thinking, going down that road again with us. Its just much easier if were just friends who have a kid.
Chandler: Yknow what the worse part was? I got to see what my life would be like without you. It was like Its a Wonderful Life with lap dances. Please promise that you will never leave me, that we will grow old together, and be with each other for the rest of our lives.