words in movies
Monica: Oh, the way you crushed Mike at ping pong was such a turn-on.You wanna...? (plays with her finger on Chandlers chest)
Phoebe: Sounds like he's with someone.
Monica: Wait a minute, I think Phoebe's right. You know I hear someone else in there with him.
Chandler: She's cheating on Joey with Ross!
Monica: Not until you said it. Somebody switch! (Chandler makes a clicking sound with his fingers and Phoebe runs to the other wall. Monica returns to Chandlers wall.) Wait a minute... Ross and Charlie, Joey and Rachel, Phoebe and Mike! We're the only people leaving with the same person we came with.
Chandler: That's not true. I came with Monica and I'm leaving with Weird Al.
Monica: Okay, I've had it with the hair jokes. Tomorrow morning, before we leave, I'm going to the salon.
Charlie: Ooh... Is it because of what might be on the bedspread, because I saw that news report too, with the infra red and the ... I could just...
Ross: No, NO! (they're moving to the side of the bed, where they sit down) Look, I need to talk to Joey. I mean, you guys just broke up. Before anything more happens between us, I need to know he's okay with it.
Chandler: (caresses the wall with his finger) Bye!
Chandler: He's probably in his room with his current girlfriend Charlie. That's the situation as we know it... (walks to Phoebe and Monica)
Rachel: Oh, ju-ju-just stay calm. Just be calm. For all he knows we're just hanging out together. Right? Just be nonchalant. (Joey like stands at attention with his chest forward and his hands on his sides, looking up at the ceiling with his lips pouted.) That's not nonchalant!
Joey: Well, he's with Charlie now.
Monica: Yeah, but he wants to talk to you before anything really happens with her. And as his friend, I mean, don't you think he deserves the same from you?
Rachel: Plus, you know, he is with Charlie now.
Chandler: You're not supposed to take that. Besides, it's a New Testament, what are you gonna do with it?
(Monica enters, with her hair braided and little shells at the end)
Joey: Look, does someone mind switching to sit with Charlie?
Ross: Oh, I uh, I mean, I... dude, I spent the whole conference with Charlie.
Chandler: Wish I could switch with someone. I really don't wanna sit with Allen Iverson over there.
Phoebe: You have a... You have a date? With who?
Mike: Oh, err... no, she's not here yet. You know, I think I'm just gonna take off and break up with her over the phone...
Monica: Oh, I can't wait for everyone at work to see these... (plays with her hair to make the shells tingle again) Ow!
[Scene: Ross's apartment.Someone's knocking on the door. Ross rushes to the door and it's Rachel with Emma.]
Ross: (gasps) Hi... There she is. Hi Emma. Oh my God, I missed you. (kisses her) Oh Emma, I missed you so much. Hey... Did you have a good time with grandma Green? Huh? Did she give you a bottle of anti-depressants again to use as a rattle? (to Rachel)
Phoebe: Yeah, I can't say that. uhm... Susie, I'm gonna be straight with you... Mike and I are back together... and uhm... unfortunately that effectively ends your relationship with him. And he's very sorry about that and wishes you the best of luck in all your endeavours.
Precious: Oh, why would he do this? I mean, what's wrong with me?
Phoebe: Nothing, there's nothing wrong with you.
Phoebe: Look, Precious... Mike's not worth this. You're an attractive, intelligent woman and let's face it, Mike's kind of a wang. I mean, he proposed to me while he was still seeing you... He was gonna break-up with you on your birthday? And, I don't like to kiss-and-tell, but he cheated on you a lot this weekend.
Precious: Oh, my God, maybe you're right. Maybe I don't need him. I deserve to be treated with respect.
(Chandler enters the bathroom, and Monica is standing there in a towel, with her hair stuck in the shower curtain.)
Monica: Oh, well, I can move... (she moves back and forth the shower curtain rail, opening and closing the shower curtain with her hair as she goes)
(Now they kiss passionately... and then Ross enters with Emma. They freeze, pull away and look at Ross who looks like he just can't believe what he's seeing. Joey straightens his shirt, and Rachel says I'm so-oo sorry, and presses her breasts together, just like Joey did before.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's. Monica walks in with one of those knitted Rasta hats.]
Ross: Look, I-I know its not a proposal and I dont know where you are, but with everything thats been going on and with Emma and Ive been feeling
[The next flashback is from The One With The Butt. The gang is watching Joey in Freud!]
Ross: Look, I-I know how miserable you are, I wish there was something I can do. I mean I wish I were a seahorse. (She glares at him) Because with seahorses its the male, they carry the babies. And then also umm, Id be far away in the sea. (He sits back down.)
(Another woman with a nurse and doctor enter, the woman is screaming.)
Rachel: No, I haven't had a chance to be alone with him yet.
Rachel: Come on you guys! Listen, if Emily knew I was here having dinner you with you she would flip out and you know it. It's okay, I really I don't mind.
Monica: Oh, I havent had that feeling since I first started going out with Chandler. Wow, Im never gonna have that feeling again am I?
The Dry Cleaner: He went out with my wife!
Amy: Well, I’m staying with you guys!
[Chandler and Monica head out with some stuff. Phoebe comes out of her room with a bag.]
Joey: Yeah-yeah, yeah, with that-that uh, plumber girl
Monica: Me neither! We have to get in! (She runs through the door with Chandler in tow.)
Monica: Youre supposed to double the tax. Not double the tax of Romania. I mean, whats-whats the deal? Are you, are you trying to buy me? Is this the way you get girls to go out with you?
Rachel: I know! I know, she says its all mass-produced, nothing is authentic, and everyone winds up having the same stuff. (Ross looks at his table.) So come on, shes gonna be here any second! Can we please just cover this up with something?! Please?
Mrs. Geller: Do you know what it's like to grow up with someone who is critical of every single thing you say?
Monica: Like asking her to move in with you?
Chandler: I stayed home from work today while you were at rehearsal so somebody could be here with our chick!
Barry: Well, if you want, I'll justI'll just break it off with her.
Rachel: (on phone) Hello, Mark? Hi, its Rachel Green. (listens) Oh no, dont you apologize. (listens) Yeah, Ill hold. (to Monica and Ross) He left my number at work, but he was helping his niece with her report on the pioneers.
Joey: Well, hes not used to women being so forward with him; but uh, I good check with himHe says its okay. (She hands him her card.) Great! Thanks! Bye-bye!
Ross: Well uh, yknow what? Even if she doesnt know anything, I do! I have a son. And his mother and I didnt live together, and whenever he was with me I took care of him all the time, by myself.
Joey: Uh, why, it’s a... (he picks a book up) one of her favorites, uh, (he reads the title of the book) “Riding the Storm Out. Coping with post-partum depression” eesh! (he puts the book back and picks up another) “Love you forever”. Love you forever. By Robert Munsch. Published by Firefly books. Printed (he pauses and changes the tone to a dramatic one) in Mexico. A mother held her new baby and very slowly rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth, and while she held him she sang “I’ll love you forever, I’ll like you for always, as long as I'm living, my baby you’ll be”. (the picture fades and Joey is now finishing the book). And while he rocked her, he sang “I’ll love you forever, I’ll like you for always, as long as I'm living, my baby you’ll be”.
Chandler: (watching in her) (in his head) Look at her go! She must love me more than I love her! Whats wrong with me? Ooh, dont open that door.
VAN DAMME: 'Cause Rachel told me uh, you were dying to have a threesome with me and uh, Drew Barrymore. By the way, Drew has some groundrules and...
Joey: Hey Mr. and Mrs. Geller! Let me help you with that.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there as Phoebe enters with her nose stuck in a book.]
Joey: Hey, you can stay with us! We'll take care of ya!
Nurse: (not sure what to do with that) Okay
Phoebe: Ohh, yeah. I think his exact words were (She makes two clicking sounds with her tongue and purrs.)
[The next clip is from The One With The Jellyfish.]
Phoebe: Because I just didn't know how much I wanted it. And I love you, and I wanted to live with you.
Ross: (with his mouth full) Just a second! (he fake laughs, but turns his head and starts to break down)
Phoebe: Good. (Phoebe and Mrs. Burkart go into the other room, leaving Monica with everyone staring at her.)
Ross: Whoah, uh, what happened to, uh, 'Forget relationships! I'm done with men!' The whole, uh, penis embargo?
Joanna: Oh no, no-no-no, is he ah, married, or involved with anyone?
Charlie: Well... I'm just thinking that maybe he's not the right guy to be with right now, maybe I should be with someone... I have more in common with. You know what I mean?
Monica: So umm, how was your date with Ginger?
Monica: Thats right. That is right, you go over there and tell her you dont want her to live with you. Do not take no for an answer!
RACHEL: Ok, Ross, try to hear me. Ok, I, hey, I'm not gonna lie to you. Ok, it was good with Paolo.
Chandler: Hey! Wow! You look great! Wanna move in with me tomorrow?
PHOEBE: Oh. Well is she, is she the first that you've been with?
Rachel: Well yknow, some people make deals with a friend, like if neither of them are married by the time theyre 40, they marry each other.
Monica: I'm telling you, she went to the airport, and she's gonna go for it with Ross!
Joey: (standing up) I will sit with you Dr. Geller. (He goes over to his table and they shake hands.)
(Joey leaves with Lorraine. Chandler sits back down with Janice.)
Joey: (to Charlie) Ok, you're gonna come back with some very classy clothes... (aside to Rachel)... and some slutty lingerie, SLUTTY!
Rachel: I wouldn't worry about it. She's always coming up with stuff like this, and you know what? She's almost never right.
Ross: wow, are you still going to move in with him?
Ross: No, its not what I want either. I mean I-I cant force myself to fall in love with her again now.
Monica: You slept with her didnt you?
Phoebe: (walking back in with her hand over her eyes.) Umm, wheres my purse?
Ross: No, I ah, I slept with someone else.
Ross: (entering with Monica in tow) Hey!
RACH: I don't know. Who would I have to sleep with?
Estelle: Ooh, what a shame! Because with her face (points to Monica) and her chest (points to Rachel) I could really put something together.
He's finally happy with that and walks away.]
(Chandler and Joey burst in, with Marcel)
Rachel: Well, I used to date him, but youre still going out with her!
Joey: Oh what, wait, wait a second, I mean, what are we doing? Whos going with who?
JOEY: Hold it hold it. I gotta side with Chandler on this one. When I first moved to the city, I went out a couple of times with this girl, really hot, great kisser, but she had the biggest Adam's apple. It made me nuts.
RACHEL: And then Jean-Claude took me to that place Crossroads and that's where we hung out with Drew Barrymore.
Ross: Listen, if you ever have any problem with the ladies you know Ill help you out.
Monica: Why don't you just take it with you?
Ross: Yeah, it's no big deal. I mean, I just met her and I'm fine with it...
Ross: Well, fine. Fine! If-if Im the only person with any appreciation of the sanctity of the written word, Ill go up there and defend it myself! (Starts to do so, but stops and to the previous librarian) And dont you follow me!
JOEY: Yeah right after we stole his lunch money and gave him a wedgie. What's the matter with you, he's parking the car.
Monica: It was okay. Shes still kind of depressed because she broke up with her boyfriend.
Ross: Really?! I mean, even with the card?
Rachel: (enters with a bag packed) Because Im going to London.
(Rachel backs out with a confused look on her face.)
Ross: You were my first kiss with Rachel?
[Scene: Rachel's new job, she's in her new boss's office (Kim's) and with the other assistant (Nancy). Together they're deciding what clothes to buy or something, who knows, let's all watch/read to find out.]
Chandler: (entering) Okay. You were right. I'm in love with Joey's girlfriend.
Chandler: What�s the matter with me? Why I�m such a girl?
Rachel: Joey, you cant let him get away with that. Ya know what, Im not going to let him get away with that. Im going to say something to himNo, I really shouldnt say anythingNo, I should say something to him. (Goes to the counter) Gunther, I want you to give Joey his job back. That is really not fair that you have to fire him
BIG BULLY: What's with this guy?
Chandler: Look, we're not just messing around! I love her. Okay, I'm in love with her.
Chandler: Yeah, and not that you would, but I wouldnt hang out with all the guys in my office.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, the whole gang is there, except for Ross and Rachel. Joey is trying to eat Chinese with chopsticks and fails miserably. Theres a knock on the door, and Chandler answers it to reveal Rachel]
Janice: Oh well thats what I thought about my first husband, now Im lucky if my kid gets to spend the weekend with her father and the twins and little Ms. New Boobs.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is coming back from work to find Phoebe, Rachel, and someone else with her back turned is there.]
Monica: I just tell her, I have to get it over with. I told Ross and Phoebe and shes the only one left!
Monica: Youre plans were with us.
Rachel: (with high pitched voice) Nobody, forget it!
[Cut to the hallway where Phoebe is conferring with Rachel.]
Ross: I didn't wanna leave him alone. Alright? We- we had our first fight this morning. I think it has to do with my working late. I said some things that I didn't mean, and he- he threw some faeces...
Rachel: (tearful) I just can't believe this! I mean, with the holidays coming up- I wanted him to meet my family-
Phoebe: So you guysll stay here and hang out with me?
Monica: Oh Joey, look, we know you're having a hard time with this, but we really, we love it here.
Ross: Oh uh, I had trouble remembering everyones name, so I-I kinda came up with nicknames. Like the guy on the other side of you was Smelly von Brownshirt.
Phoebe: Yeah... ooh... wow... Even started to think I'd never meet someone that, you know, I wanted to... do this with. Here you go. (Both Phoebe and Mike look really proud.)
Written by: Marta Kaufmann & David Crane Transcribed by: guineapig With Help From: Rachel Stigge
Rachel: Okay. Switch places with me! Switch places with me! Come on! Ill go under, you go over!
Joey: Yeah, with my mom. Yeah, not so much with my dad.
Chandler: I know you probably dont want to go out with me, yknow because I make too many jokes and Ive never been in a serious relationship and I guess Im not technically a "doctor "
Monica: (to Rachel) Look at you with all the guys!
Monica: I am going I'm going--Turn it over! (Rachel rolled onto her stomach and Monica rolls her back.) I'm I am going to get these drops in your eyes. (She is holding Rachel down with both hands and has the eyedropper in her mouth.)
Joey: Hey, that guy's going home with more than a note!
Joey: Im doing my scenes with you?
Ross: I don’t know. Phoebe, if one of us saw Mike with another woman would you want us to tell you?