words in movies
Phoebe: I have a date with this diplomat I met while I was giving free massages outside the UN and, I dont know where his country is.
Monica: Okay, lets start with the free messages outside the UN.
Joey: Yeah, are you just going down there to gawk at that hot girl with the belly button ring again?
Chandler: Come on Chloe! Finish up with your customer first. Come on Chloe! Come on Chloe!!
Issac: Chloe, switch with me, theres some guys here that got a crush on you.
[Scene: A Street, Phoebe is walking along with the diplomat (Sergei) and his translator (Mischa).]
Mischa: Hes says, Walking with you makes this strange city, feel like home.
Monica: Oh thats my doodle of a ladybug, with a top hat. (to Phoebe) Shes fancy.
Rachel: No-no-no, no, honey please, Ive got, Ive just have so much to deal with.
Phoebe: (to Monica) Anyway, Im going out with Sergei again tonight, and um, could you come and be the translators date? So that when we, its time for our alone time, you two could split off. Y'know, hes really, hes kinda cute.
Chandler: She was.... But y'know what, just in case, maybe we should come up with a set of ground rules.
Chandler: Yeah. Good call, nice one. Hold it!! Hold it! What if me eyes are closed, and, and my hand is out there.... (holds his arm out and pretends to grab something with his hand.)
Chandler: Well it you dont know that, then I dont want to do this with you.
[Scene: Rachels office, Rachel and a co-worker (Sophie) are dealing with the crisis.]
Rachel: Well, let me just check that with what I got here, all right see 038 is not the number for (Ross starts making a lot of noise with a handheld pepper grinder) this store, 038 is Atlanta. And I...(stops and looks at Ross)
Ross: (putting out the fire with a squeeze bottle of water) Okay, thats a fire. Oh yeah. Oh yeah.
Ross: Yeah, well excuse me for wanting to be with my girlfriend on our anniversary, boy what an ass am I.
Ross: No, hey, I get that, okay, I get that big time. And Im happy for ya, but Im tired of having a relationship with your answering machine! Okay, I dont know what to do anymore.
Chloe: I want you to met some friends of mine. (Introduces him to Chandler and Joey) This guy is my hero, he comes in with some stuff he wants it blown up 400%, we said we dont do that, and he says you gotta. And y'know what, we did it. And now anytime anybody wants 400, we just say lets Ross it!
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Phoebe are on their dates with Sergei and Mischa.]
Mischa: Well, you just asked if I wanted to go to bed with you tonight.
[Scene: The Philly, With or Without You is playing. (Which is the same song Ross played for Rachel in TOW the List.)]
[Scene: The Philly, Ross is dancing with Chloe.]
(She kisses him. Ross leans back for a second, and then they both kiss, more passionately this time as U2's With or Without You plays in the background.)
Dr. Rhodes: He's good with rear things, bring him in too.
Monica: Uh, would you stop it with that already?!
Monica: Where you can make out with your assistant.
Phoebe: No, were gonna paint over the sword, and replace it with a baguette.
Phoebe: All right. We're gonna take Clunkers to Rosss. We'll be back in a minute. (Gets up with Monica to do so.)
Chandler: Nothing for you, you have Paolo. You don't have to face the horrible pressures of this holiday: desperate scramble to find anything with lips just so you can have someone to kiss when the ball drops!! Man, I'm talking loud!
Rachel: What is wrong with raising a kid in the city? I'm doing it, Ross is doing it, Sarah Jessica Parker is doing it!
Rachel: Oh! (They enter. Rachel sees his father, lying on a bed, with tubes, drip and everything) Oh! Oh my God! Ohhh, ohhh, wow, that ear and nose hair trimmer I got him was just money down the drain, huh?
Carol: You slept with another woman?
Chandler: What is the matter with you?
Rachel: In the afternoon. Mr. Zelner came into my office after lunch. He put them on my desk, and then I put a Post-It on it (Looks down onto her desk and finds the folder with the Post-It on it that contains the contracts she imagined she gave Tag) that said, "Must go out today." So you just keep looking in there! All right?
Mr. Zelner: Uh actually, Id like to speak with both of you.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is getting ready for his date with Kristen.]
Joey: (with his mouthful) Hey, I didn't stalk her. I mean (he sprays Phoebe with crumbs)
Phoebe: So, how are things going with crazy? Has she cooked your rabbit yet?
JOEY: Wow, talk about your bad luck, I mean, the first time you try panties and someone walks off with your clothes.
CHANDLER: So, uhh, em, you want me to uh, give you a hand with the foosball table?
Rachel: how about I move in with you?
Rachel: Phoebe, come on can we finish this later? Cause I wanna go running before it gets dark. Oh! Why don't you come with me?!
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe is there with Roger.]
Joey: Yeah! Yeah, Ive been trying to find ya to tell to stop messing with her and maybe I would have if these (lifts a leg) damn boat shoes wouldnt keep flying off!
Monica: What?! Ross y'know this isnt even about you! I mean this is about Rachel and something wonderful happening for her. I mean you know even if youre right, what if he wants to sleep with her, does it mean he gets too?
Phoebe: (entering with Erin) Oh. Hey!
Rachel: No, its Ross. Its Ross. You like Ross. (He just shakes his head.) Oh daddy, I hope youre okay with all of this. I mean think about it, this is a good thing. Youre gonnaThis is your first grandchild! Youre gonna be a poppy!
Rachel: (entering with Phoebe) Hey!
Chandler: Really? Oh What A Beautiful Morning! Surrey With A Fringe On Top.
Joey: Yknow what Ross? Im not gonna let you get away with this!
Phoebe: Well, the only thing you can do. Sleep with Ralph Lauren.
Ross: Oh umm, well uh, maybe-maybe later. Right now, Im about to dance with this lady.
Joey: No. No. But Ill go see a normal person movie with ya.
Phoebe: There you go! (She continues to work him over with her elbows and he continues to yell in pain.)
Ross: You know, I'm just not uhm... that comfortable with a guy who's as sensitive as you.
Phoebe: Okay, I would ring the bell to distract him and then I would knock the gun out of his hand with a Chinese throwing star.
Doctor Connelly: Ok, given your situation, the options with the greatest chances for success would be surrogacy, or insemination using a sperm donor.
Chandler: Oh nope, I-I have plans with Joey.
Joey: Well, given that he's desperately in love with you, he probably wouldn't mind getting a cup of coffee or something.
Monica: Ugh, shes upstairs not doing the dishes! And I tell ya something! Im not doing them this time! I dont care if those dishes sit in the sink until theyre all covered withIll do them when I get home!
Joey: No. no... eh... she went shopping with Rachel. Why? What's up?
Dr. Franzblau: I don't know, could be an hour, could be three, but relax, she's doing great. So, uh, tell me, are you currently involved with anyone?
Chandler: Yep! And! A beautiful woman agreed to go out with me. (Theyre stunned.) Joey wanted to ask her out, but uh, she picked me.
Paul: I wanted to be one with the waves, yknow?
Ross: Emily that's ridiculous. Look, I'm-I'm moving for you, I'm cutting friends out of my life for you. Please, just get on the plane and come to New York. Okay, you'll see you're the only person I want to be with.
(Joey takes the ice-bucket with the champagne bottle in it and puts it on his sore spot)
Ross: Look, I (He has trouble sitting in his chair.) Look, Im having a great time with you and I just dont want us to move to fast or put to much pressure on us. So, Im sorry I just dont think we should go away together yet. Its-its too soon.
[Scene: Joey's audition, he is with bag.]
Chandler: Yeah! When you were talking about Roger, that was killing me! Look, things like last night they dont just happen. Yknow? Or at least not to me. Or with the other two women, in the morning yknow I was just lying there and I couldnt wait to just go hang out with my friends, but with you I always yknow with a friend.
Chandler: Yeah, now how's that going though? Are you okay with the not-flirting thing?
MONICA: And then he told me he would run away with me, and he didn't. [throws water in his face]
Ross: That guy Mark. From Bloomingdale's... She thinks he's just being nice to her. But I know he really wants to sleep with her.
Chandler: Well its just while Monica and I were dancing to them it was the first time I knew that you were the woman I wanted to dance all my dances with.
RADIO: Uh, we've just gotten a call from Rachel, and she told us what Ross did. It's pretty appalling, and Ross, if you're listening, I don't wanna play your song anymore. Why don't we devote our time to a couple that stands a chance? Avery, Michelle's sorry she hit you with her car and she hopes you two will work it out.
Phoebe: But-but you know you cannot get involved with your assistant.
JOEY: Great. Then you'll be able to spend more quality time with your real friends, the spoons.
Ross: (entering with Monica) Hey!
Monica: Ross! He's playing with my spatulas again!
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. They are having a diner party with Phoebe and Mike.]
Rachel: So hows it goin with Joey?
Chandler: Well, I heard that you thinking about asking Phoebe to move in with you and I thought maybe, we should have a talk. Man to uh, me.
Rachel: Well you couldve untied it with your hands.
Phoebe: Oh my God! I had the best time with Tim last night. He is so sweet! Oh, I cant wait to get sous-neath him.
[Scene: The Reception, Joey is helping Ross walk after Gert got through with him and Mona is looking on concerned.]
Monica: There's nothing to tell! He's just some guy I work with!
Joey: Look, can I just stop you right there for a second? When people do this (Makes quote marks with his fingers.) I dont really know what that means. (Ross just looks at him) You were saying?
Joey: Sure! I would love to wait with you guys! Thanks! (Sits down.)
Ross: Done! With time a-to-spare.
Ross: (drags Chandler over to buffet table) Im telling you, this guy Rachel is with is crazy! Okay? He viscously screamed at total strangers! I think hes baaad news!
Chandler: All right, so that's Missy Goldberg, Phoebe Cates and Molly Ringwald, who neither of us can go out with.
Rachel: Dr. Long, Ive been at this for seventeen hours! Three women have come and gone with their babies, you gotta give me some good news! How many centimeters am I dilated? Eight? Nine?
Joey: Are you kidding me? Watch! (Makes funny faces trying to cry) Well I cant do it with you guys watching me!
Joey: Well, hes too shy, he doesnt thing hes good enough to dance with girls yet.
RACHEL: I know. And Mom, I realize you and Daddy were upset when I didn't marry Barry and get the big house in the suburbs with all the security and everything, but this is just so much better for me, you know?
Joey: Hey listen, why dont you come downstairs with me? Theres some really nice girls down there.
RADIO: The next one's dedicated to Rachel from Ross. Rachel, he wants you to know he's deeply sorry for what he did and he hopes you can find it in your heart to forgive him. (With or Without You plays)
Chandler: We should start with the big stuff. Yknow? That'll be the easiest. Uh, let's start with the couch. (He picks up one end and Ross doesn't help) I got it. (He moves it back to where he thinks it goes.)
Phoebe: Umm, yeah, I'd like to go out with you officer
Prospective nanny: Oh, you know, wait. I do have one question. (she starts playing with her hair) Do you guys do random drug testing?
ROSS: Uh, nothing, nothing's with him. Enjoy your coffee.
Chip: So you still in touch with anyone from high school?
Rachel: Oh, could somebody give me a hand with this zipper?
Amy: Well, I don't need you to help me, because I already know what I'm going to do with my life.
Rachel: (to Joey) Hey, who's Phoebe with?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, later. Rachel is waitressing, Monica is cooking. Phoebe walks in with Steve (Crystal Duck winner Jon Lovitz).]
(He tries pushing against the chest of drawers. Then he opens one of the drawers and climbs into the closet using that; he falls behind the chest of drawers with a shout.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is entering with a pizza and finds everyone but Ross there.]
Chandler: Hey! (Joey doesn't look up, but gestures 'wait a minute' with his finger while he finishes reading the article. Chandler waits for Joey to finish.) I need you to set me up for a joke. Later, when Monica is around, I need you to ask me about fire trucks.
Chandler: All right! Fine! But its just a lunch date, no more than an hour! And from now on I get my own dates, I dont want you setting me up with anybody ever again!
Chandler: Hey, how was your breakfast with Hillary?
Rachel: Oh God Monica hi! Thank God! I just went to your building and you weren't there and then this guy with a big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are!
RACHEL: No, I know, they're from me. Look you guys this is not good. I mean we have enough trouble with guys stealing our wind without taking it from each other.
PHOEBE: What is this obsessive need you have to make everyone agree with you? No, what's that all about? I think, I think maybe it's time you put Ross under the microscope.
VAN DAMME: Are you sure, I can crush a walnut with my butt.
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Rachel is fiddling with the drawer.]
Ross: I have a bone to pick with you.
Chandler: A freakish thin date with a hanger for her head?
Phoebe: Nuh-uh! Theyre maternity pants. They even came with a list of baby names. (Pulls out a sheet of paper which lists whos been naughty and whos been nice.) See, these names are good, and these names are bad. (Finally, she figures it out.) Ohh.
Ross: He was roommates with John Rosoff. He went out with Andrea Tamburino. She dumped him for Michael Skloff.
Joey: Okay. All right. You look me in the eye and tell me, without blinking, that you're not breaking up with her. No blinking.
Ross: Well, Rachel's having drinks with him tonight.
Ross: I'm familiar with his work, yes...
Ross: Theres this kid in my class who said hes in love with me.