words in movies
Rachel: Do you have anything that would... get us out of them?
Phoebe: I think David would probably wanna hear a few lectures.
Woman: I would love your autograph. (hands him a notepad)
Charlie: Oh I can't... I have seminars all day and I promised Ross I would look at his speech.
Chandler: That would be advice!!
Ross: Why, why would you open it?
Chandler: I think we have some time. Have you ever heard him talk? (doing David) "Uh, Phoebe, uh, I would be honoured, uh..." Spit it out, David!
David: (annoyed) Ok, would you care for my seat as well?
Phoebe: Yeah, I might have said yes, but that would have been wrong.
David: Please, you don't have to explain. I mean, perhaps if I hadn't gone to Minsk things would have worked out for us. And I wouldn't have ruined my career, or lost that toe to frostbite. It was a good trip! (he leaves)
Rachel: I don't know, I'm not trying to do anything, it's just, we have such a good time when we're together, you know... I mean, aren't you just a... little curious... (insinuating) what that would be like?...
Phoebe: Oh my God, hes not even appreciated in his own time. I would give anything to not be appreciated in my own time!
PHOEBE: Why would you kill his fish?
RICHARD: Or so I would have you believe.
Gunther: You would think.
Chandler: I mean, You wouldn't want any part of me to get any bigger would you? Don't answer that.
Joey: Would you let it go Ross. It was just a dream. It doesn't mean...
Mr. Geller: Don't listen to your mother. You're independent, and you always have been! Even when you were a kid... and you were chubby, and you had no friends, you were just fine! And you would read alone in your room, and your puzzles...
Monica: No, a guy would be saying, "Im never gonna get to sleep with anyone else." Oh my God! Im never gonna get to sleep with anyone else! Ive been so busy planning the wedding that I forgot about all the things that Id be giving up! I mean, I Im never gonna have a first kiss again.
Phoebe: I can't ask him! Do you have any idea how inappropriate that would be?! All I'm saying is just talk to Frank. Okay? Just, y'know, feel him out!
Monica: You know what would be real weird? Is if you werent there. Just say youll think about it, okay?
Student: I was wondering if you would consider coaching me for it?
Frank Sr.: Well Lilly, when you see Lilly would you give her that, that note? Because I wanted to talk to her at the memorial but, well I pictured her getting mad at me the way you got mad at me and I well, I chickened out. So, uh, I wrote her that note, would you give it to her please?
Ross: Ok well, I would like to do a dig in the painted desert.
Monica: Would you please go?
Phoebe: Will it? Will it?! I mean, how would you feel if you found out you were 31?
Joey: I would sooner die in this hellhole then see her back with you!
Ross: Look, I'm sure it would be great, but I-I think one of us has to be thinking clearly, so, I'm gonna go!
Rachel: Because, I feel like I wouldn't just be going out with him. I would be going out with all of you. Oh, and there would just be all this pressure, and I don't wanna...
Woman On Train: Were at my stop. But would you like to have coffee?
Donny: ...should be playing with the star of "General Hospital" Leslie Charleson. (applause) Welcome everybody. Good luck to all of you. Let's play Pyramid. All right? Now... we flipped a coin before the show, Gene, you won the toss, so you're gonna start. Which category would you like?
Joey: Then why would you say that?!
Rachel: Ohh! I would kill for a salmon skin roll right now!
Ross: Unless (Rachel groans.) You anticipated that I would figure all this out and you know that it actually is a girl, and you really do want her to be named Ruth! Well, Im not falling for that! Okay? Ruth is off the table!
MONICA: I can't believe that this whole time we thought he hated us. I mean, isn't it amazing how much you can touch someone's life, without even knowing it?...Would you look at this dump? He hated us. This is his final revenge!
Monica: Hey Rach, the adoption agency needs letters of recommendation and we were wondering if you would write one for us.
Rachel: Phoebe, your in pain, would you just go to the dentist, just go.
Rachel: Pheebs, if I had never met him this never would have happened!
Rachel: (nervous) So it would just be, me alone?
Chandler: No! That would be so awkward! LookBesides, we work in different departments. Hes on the sixth floor yknow? So he calls me Toby once in a while. Whats the big deal? It could be worse, its not like hes calling me Muriel. (Chandler suddenly freezes into place.)
Rachel: Yeah, it would be really weird.
Ross: No, no, that's not where I was going. Er, if you get in the... way, of us becoming a thing, then I would be, well, very sad.
Rachel: Okay. (Starts to go.) God yknow, if someone told me a week ago that I would be peeing in Joey Tribbianis apartment
Monica: Why else would we be here?
Ross: Its a good thing I didnt do it, because it sounds like it wouldve been a very expensive wedding. (Rachel laughs) Okay, good night
Joey: Oh my, would you look at that! (holds up crossed fingers)
Ross: That would be great.
Chandler: Rach, if you have a crush on this guy, why would you hire him? I mean yknow you cant date him right?
Ross: (To Monica) Look, okay-okay I had food poisoning! Its not like I choose to do it! Its not likeIts not like I said, "Umm, what would make this ride more fun?!"
Rachel: All right. Lets say I had slept with Mark. Would you have been able to forgive me?
Phoebe: Yeah, you are. And I'm so glad that you fought your way back in, because I don't know what I would do without you.
Monica: Rachel, what are you doing? Its freezing out here. Would you come back inside?
Phoebe: No, look, I told you that I didnt want you to try and sell it, and you just, you big fat did it anyway. God, y'know what, I think five years ago I probably wouldve done anything to play with you but, I can do it by myself. And if I cant trust you then just forget it.
Amy: Its such a slap in the face. I'm your sister and you would give your baby to these strangers over me.
Rachel: You would be too if you found John and David boots on sale, fifty percent off!
Chandler: Oh, uh, that would be mine. See, I wrote a note to myself, and then I realised I didn't need it, so I balled it up and... (sees that Monica is glaring at him) ...now I wish I was dead.
Ross: Well, what-what would you do? Rach, if you were me, what-what would you do?
Ross: I would!
Doctor Connelly: Ok, given your situation, the options with the greatest chances for success would be surrogacy, or insemination using a sperm donor.
Monica: I know, I just thought it would be fun.
Ross: No, I-I thought it would be more fun this way.
Monica: I just thought it would be nice if I could have just this one night!
Phoebe: Your hair looks too good, I think it would upset her. Ross, why don't you come on in.
Joanna: Would you? Or, is it just to sad and desperate, and y'know something that Sophie would do?
Rachel: So that we would have something to talk about! So it wouldnt be awkward!
Monica: Okay, I feel like Im talking to Lassie. All right, Phoebe would you just tell me!
Phoebe: Well, of course I would want to see you. I I think about you all the time.
MONICA: Well, I just think the baby would keep falling off the dog. Do you, uh, do you , do you not see kids in our future.
ROSS: A tattoo? Why, why would you want to do that? [to Rachel] Hi.
Chandler: Ah, I dont know, you tell me. Anything you ah, wanna tell me, because, if you ah, you should, if you, you would, tell me.
Rachel: But I already told Zelner that I would come back...
Ross: (sarcastic) That would be a good way to get rid of all the PCP we have lying around.
Ross: Well Im, Im a little slow. (To himself) Just as our children would be.
Phoebe Sr: I realise I dont have any right to start get all parenty on you and everything now, but umm, (Sees that Phoebe isnt paying attention and is busy mimicking the puppy.) uhh Phoebe, would you please look at me and not the puppy, its very important.
Phoebe: Uh! The psychic also said that I would be betrayed.
Joey: Uh, if I may? Umm-umm look, Cliff, you told me a lot of personal stuff about you, right? And maybe-maybe it would if-if would help if-if you knew some personal stuff about her. Uh, she was married to a gay ice dancer. Uh, she gave birth to her brothers triplets. Oh! Oh! Her-her twin sister used to do porn!
Chandler: (loud) Ken, please! No, I can�t, I can�t smoke. If I smoke, my wife would kill me.
MRS GREEN: I guess I just figured of all people you would understand this.
(When Rachel starts to look under the bed if Joey would fit under there, Chandler opens the door inbetween the rooms, grabs Joey by his shirt and drags him to his room, and closes the door again)
Rachel: Yeah, and also we need more umm, drinks. Hold on a second. (Gets up but stumbles a little bit.) Whup, okay. (She makes it to the phone and picks it up, without dialing.) Hello! Vegas? Yeah, we would like some more alcohol, and y'know what else? We would like some more beers. Hello? Ohh, I forgot to dial!
Voice: What is the name of your roommate who is very, very sorry and would do anything (Joey realizes its Chandler and hangs up the phone in anger.)
{Transcribers note: This is where the opening credits are, but theyre not the usual opening credits. Oh no! These credits are based on the world that would have been created had all of the above actually happened. It starts out with all of them at the fountain sitting on the couch as Fat Monica runs up and sits on the arm of the couch, tilting the whole thing towards her. It then goes on to show Rachels still a shop-aholic and with Barry. Fat Monica is sweating while cooking and dancing while eating a donut. Phoebe as the Wall Street shark smoking while on two cell phones. Then theyre dancing in the fountain. Joey entering as Dr. Drake Remoray and meeting a groupie. Chandler trying to write as a bird does its business on his shoulder and falling asleep while typing. Ross doing some kara-tay and trying to get Carol into bed. And finally, some more dancing in the fountain, them all flexing, and the turning out the lamp and shutting off all the lights bit from the first season. Just remember one thing, this is an alternate universe. Everything from every other episode doesnt apply, for instance, Ross and Rachel have no history. And in fact have not seen each other in years in this world.}
Emily: Ohh, I dont think so. I mean it would be different if it was way into the future and-and-and we were getting married or something.
Monica: (angrily) It wasnt funny at all! Why would you do that? Why didnt you pick me?
The Saleslady: Yes! I have it right here. (Phoebe and Monica both gasp at the dress.) Would you like to try it on Ms. Waltham?
Rachel: Okay, good. Now that since you know, when you come over would you mind actually using it?
Monica: We're moving in a couple of days and we've got a lot of packing to do. It would be great if you guys could pitch in.
(They kiss and both put their hands on the others face like Jessica would do.)
Chandler: Okay, all right. I just spent the entire afternoon looking for a present for Kathy that would be better than the rabbit.
Phoebe: I think she would like that.
Rachel: Ohh, its Joshua invited me to this fancy club opening tonight. But, I already told Mr. Waltham that I would take his niece to this dumb old opera. So What are you gonna do?
Rachel: Oh, that would be great! (Sandy leaves for Emma's room) I love him, I love him, I love him...
Rachel: Monica, would you calm down? The credit card people said that you only have to pay for the stuff that you bought.
Rachel: Oh no!!!! Oh my God!! This is all making so much sense to me now! This is why Adam Carter wouldnt go out with me! This is why Billy Tratt would just stay in this region! (Motions to her breasts.) (Joey has turned around.)
CHANDLER: (on pay phone) Come on, pick up, pick up! Hello? Transit Authority? Yes, hello. I'm doing research for a book, and I was wondering what someone might do if they left a baby on a city bus. Yes I do realize that would be a very stupid charact er.
Rachel: Okay. Honey, I would love for you to go with me. (Ross has a worried look on his face) What?
Rachel: You have! Ross, you should give yourself credit. I mean my Mom never thought this would work out. It was all, Once a cheater, always a cheater.
Rachel: Okay you have to realize, I was exhausted, I was emotional, I would have said yes to anybody. Like that time you and I got married! (Pause) Im not helping.
Rachel: No! God, would you just calm down!
Monica: (On phone) Hi, Nancy. Hi, it's Monica Geller. I'm good. Listen, I'm looking for a job in Tulsa. Well yeah, my husband has been relocated...Because I love him! No, I don't want a job in New York. Javo (sp?) is looking? Oh my God! He asked for me personally? Oh my God! Oh, wow, this is really flattering, but I'm moving to Tulsa. Yeah, so if you would tell Javo (sp?) 'I'll take it!'
CHANDLER: Ok, think, what would Jack and Chrissy do?
Joey: There’s a part in a TV movie that I would be perfect for and I didn’t even be put up for it! She’d better have a good reason.
RACH: Why would I have to sleep with you?
Rachel: (sighs) If I said I was, would you judge me?
Ross: Well, Im just saying, I mean why else would he just, y'know, swoop in out of nowhere for no reason.
Rachel: (entering from her bedroom) You guys, (holds up an outfit) does this look like something the girlfriend of a paleontologist would wear?
Chandler: (excited) Guys, guys, I've got great news! Guess what Joey: Uh, ah, Monica's pregnant?! Monica: (shocked) Really? (She looks around, suddenly embarrassed) Let's get past the moment. Phoebe: What's your news? Chandler: Thank you. I got a job in advertising. (Everybody cheers) Monica: (hugging Chandler) Oh, honey, that's incredible! Phoebe: (inquisitive) Gosh, what's the pay like? (Everybody stares at her indignantly) Oh, come on people (defending) come on, now, if I don't know who makes the most, how do I know who I like the most! (She looks at Joey) Hey Joey! (Joey winks at her) Chandler: Actually, it pays nothing. It's an internship. Joey: Oh, that's cool. We have interns at 'Days Of Our Lives'. Chandler: Right. So, it'll be the same except less sex with you. (Joey nods) Ross: So, uh, what kinda stuff do you think they'll have you do there? Chandler: Well, it's a training program, but at the end, they hire the people they like. Phoebe: (enthusiastic) That's great. Chandler: Yeah, I mean, there's probably gonna be some ground work which will probably stink, you know, grown man getting people coffee is a little humiliating (At the same time, Gunther puts down a cup of coffee in front of Chandler) Chandler: (grinning awkwardly) Humiliating and noble! (Gunther shoots a nasty look at him while leaving) Ross: You know, if I didn't already have a job, I think, I would have been really good in advertising. Monica: Ross, you did not come up with "got milk?" Ross: Yes, I did, I did! (He turns to Joey, disappointed) I should have written it down!
Phoebe: She was acting, she was pretending like she hasnt heard from him on years, but I found this picture on her fridge, and look (shows Monica)! Isnt this what he would look like now?
Chandler: Yeah, and not that you would, but I wouldnt hang out with all the guys in my office.
Joey: Who would you rather sleep with Monica or Rachel?
Rachel: Nooo! Its not okay! I cant believe you would want to after what he did to me!