words in movies
Joey: You guys, can we please not watch this all right.
Host: Folks, has this ever happened to you. You go to the refrigerator to get a nice glass of milk, (Joey is in the background struggling to open a cartoon of milk) and these darn cartons are so flingin'-flangin' hard to open.
Joey: (on tv) Oh, you said it Mike. (rips open the carton and spills milk on the counter) Aw! There's got to be a better way!
Ross: (to Chandler) Are you intrigued?
Mike: Keep in mind, he's never used this product before, you're gonna see how easy this is to do. (to Kevin) Go ahead. ('Kevin' starts using the product, it is a spout that you jab into a paper milk carton so that you don't have to rip it open.) This works with any milk carton.
Monica: Perhaps, you would like me to turn like this, (turns sideways on the couch) so that you can bunny bump against my back.
Joey: Maybe you can tell me. My agent would like to know why I didn't show up at the audition I didn't know I had today. The first good thing she gets me in weeks. How could you not give me the message?!
Joey: How is it you?
Phoebe: Well, it was just, it was all so crazy, you know. I mean, Chandler was in the closet, counting to 10, and he was up to 7 and I hadn't found a place to hide yet. I-I-I meant to tell you, and I wrote it all down on my hand. See, all of it. (shows him her hand)
Phoebe: Yep, and that's why we don't invite you to play.
Janice: What is the great tragedy here? You go get yourself another appointment.
Joey: Well, Estelle tried, you know. The casting director told her that I missed my chance.
Joey: Pheebs, you can't do that. The casting director doesn't talk to friends, she only talks to agents.
Joey: What, what are you doing? What are you doing?
Phoebe: (on phone) 'Annie! Hi. Listen we got a problem with Joey Tribbiani, apparently he missed his audition. Who did you speak to in my office? Estelle, no, I don't know what I'm going to do with her. No. All right, so your husband leaves and burns down the apartment, the world does not stop.'
Phoebe: (on phone) 'Right, well look, um, if Joey loses this audition, that is it for Estelle. I don't care! Annie you are a doll, what time can you see him?' (to Monica) I need a pen. (Chandler hands her one, but she needs something to right on, so she tilts Chandler's head over and writes on the back of his neck)
Monica: Oh, now you want a pad.
Ross: You know what it's fine. If you're okay with the Barbi thing, so am I.
Ross: Give daddy the Barbi! Ben, give, give me the Barbi. Okay, how 'bout, don't you want to play with the monster truck? (makes a monster truck sound) No. Okay, oh, oh, how about a Dino-soilder? (squawks like a dinosaur)
Rachel: Ross, you are so pathetic. Why can't your son just play with his doll? (uses the Milk Master 2000 to pour milk into her cereal)
Monica: There it is. Joey, what are you doing?
Joey: Hey, I only got one good arm, you know. You should be doing stuff for me. Go get me a sweater.
Rachel: What's the big deal? Why don't you wanna see Janice?
Ross: And that's bad because..., you hate chicken piccata?
Ross: You didn't want to share your tomatoes, tomatoes are very important to you.
Monica: What is it with you people! I mean, the minute you start to feel something, you have to run away?
Monica: Oh, you mean like that guy thing where you act mean and distant until you get us to break up with you.
Joey: Hey, you know about that?!
Joey: Well, I've never been through the tunnel myself, 'cause as I understand it, you're not allowed to go through with more than one girl in the car, right. But, it seems to me it's pretty much like anything else, you know, face your fear. It have a fear of heights, you go to the top of the building! If you're afraid of bugs.....get a bug. Right. In this case, you have a fear of commitment, so I say you go in there and be the most committed guy there ever was.
Chandler: You think?
Chandler: Yeah, Joe, I assure you if I'm staring down the barrel of a gun, I'm pretty much peeing every which way.
Rachel: Sure Pheebs, you know, that's what it's there for, emergencies and pretend agents.
Phoebe: (on phone, in 'Katelynn's' voice) 'Hi, I have Phoebe Buffay returning a page. Okay, well, um, she's in her car I'll have to patch you through.'
Phoebe: (in voice, on phone) 'Okay, go ahead.' (in normal voice on phone) Um, hi Annie. (listens) Fantastic! (to Joey) You got it. (on phone) Oh, okay, um, 'Will he work for scale?' you ask me. Well, I don't know about that, (Joey clears his throat to signify yes) except that I do and he will. Great, oh you are such a sweetheart. I would love to have lunch with you, how about we have lunch next....(hangs up phone) Op, went through a tunnel.
Joey: Thank you so much.
Joey: You were amazing, could you just do me this huge favor, you see there's this one other audition that I really, really want, and Estelle couldn't get me in.
Joey: Yeah! Well, well really it's three. Please. You're so good at it. I love you.
Janice: So, how come you wanted to eat in tonight?
Chandler: 'Cause, I wanted to uh, give you this. (hands her a present)
Janice: Ohhh, are you a puppy! (opens it) Contact paper! I never really know what to say when someone you're sleeping with gives you contact paper.
Janice: Oh, you didn't have to do this.
Janice: (laughs) I don't think we need to, because you're tripping me out right now! Are you okay?
Janice: You probably want us to move in together?
Janice: Yeah, well, it scares me! I mean I not even divorced yet, Chandler. You know, you just invited me over here for pasta, and all of the sudden you're talking about moving in together. And, and I wasn't even that hungry. You know what, it's getting a little late, and I-I should just, um...(starts to leave)
Chandler: Oh, no, no, no, don't go! I've scared ya'! I've said too much! I'm hopeless, and awkward, and desperate for love!! (Janice leaves, Chandler then calls Janice to leave a message on her machine) Hey, Janice! It's me. Um, yeah, I-I-I just wanna apologize in advance for having chased you down the street. (runs out the door)
Rachel: Okay, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Maybe it's not so bad. How did you leave it?
Monica: You know, when you start get screwed over all the time, you gotta switch to low-fat.
Rachel: Yeah, you do.
Chandler: So, you don't think I'm terminal?
Monica: Well, no, not at all, you're not terminal, you just, you just need some damage control.
Rachel: This is a very critical time right now. If you feel yourself reaching for that phone, then you go shoe shopping, you get your butt in a bubble bath. You want her back you have to start acting aloof.
Rachel: Right. So, what you have to do is, you have to accidentally run into her on purpose. And then act aloof.
Rachel: G.I. Joe? Do you really think he's gonna fall for that?
Joey: Pheebs! There you are!
Phoebe: Oh, Joey! Oh, okay, see I didn't recognize you wearing, in those....pants.
Joey: Look listen, that TV movie I went in for? Did you hear anything? I think I got a shot at it.
Phoebe: Yes! They called and you didn't get it! Okay, I mean you didn't get it, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Phoebe: But they shouldn't happen, you know what, you're, you're in a terrible, terrible business. Oh God, I don't wanna be the person who makes your face look like that.
Phoebe: Oh, now you're sad and creepy, oh. You know what, I, I'm sorry I quit, okay, I just quit.
Joey: No! No, no you can't quit! You're the best agent I ever had! Look Pheebs, rejection is part being an actor, you can't take it personally.
Joey: No, no, no, see that's why you have to do this job, agents always lie. You know, Estelle just says stuff like 'They went another way', but this, I can use this. (in a very bad Italian accent) I canna work on a new accent.
Phoebe: Yeah okay, no if it helps you okay. Yeah.
Janice: (to butcher) No, thank you. (Chandler makes a sound and she notices him) Chandler!
Janice: What are you doing here?
Chandler: (in accent) Oh, just a bit of shopping. How've you been?
Janice: Are you being British?!
Janice: Why are you shopping here? You don't live in this neighborhood. Were you here waiting for me?
Chandler: Yeah, huh. I'm just uh, you know I'm just picking up some things for a party. (grabs a bag off of the shelf)
Janice: Okay, you know, one of two things is happening here. Either you're seeing somebody behind my back, which would make you the biggest jerk on the planet. Or, else you're pretending that you're seeing somebody, which just makes you so pathetic that I could start crying right here in the cereal aisle. So like which of these two guys do you want to be? (another guy walks by)
Phoebe: No. They said you 'Weren't believable as a human being.' So, you can work on that.
Joey: You do, thanks.
Joey: Wait a minute, did you just make up all that stuff just to get out of being my agent.
Phoebe: (in a coy tone) Oh, you caught me. I am so busted.
Chandler: ....And then I just, you know, threw the bag of barley at her, and ran out of the store.
Monica: You know what, everything's gonna be okay.
Chandler: (answering phone) Hello. Hi, Janice! Can you hold on for a second? Okay. (to Monica and Rachel) Okay, what do I do?
Monica: If-if-if we ever did what you did a man would never call.
Monica: Oh wait, you know what, I got it, I got it, pretend like you just woke up, okay, that will throw her off. Be sleepy.
Chandler: What are you, stop naming dwarves! (on phone) Hello, Janice. Hi, I'm so glad that you called, I know I've been acting a really weird lately. And, it's just because I'm crazy about you, and I just got...stupid, and, and scared, and....stupid a couple of more times. I'm sorry. (listens) Really?! (listens) Really?!
Chandler: (on phone) I love you too.
Ross: Hey, I don't know what to tell you guys that's the doll he chose.
Susan: What'd you do, dip it in sugar?
Ross: Look, G. I. Joe's in, Barbi's out. And if you guys can't deal with it, that's your 'too bad.'
Monica: What are you being such a weenie for? So he has a Barbi, big deal. You used to dress up like a woman.
Monica: Well, you used to dress up in Mom's clothes all the time.
Ross: What are you talking about?
Ross: Okay, you are totally making this up.
Monica: How can you not remember? You made us call you...Bea.
Monica: '....Won't you, won't you, won't you.... '
Ross: (coming out of the bathroom) Won't you dance around with me.
Young Ross: (singing) 'I am Bea. I drink tea. Won't you dance around with....' (spills some tea and it drips onto his/her dress) Ohhh! (runs away crying)
Phoebe: Save it Red! Unless you wanna spend the night in the slammer, you apologize to the tree.
Phoebe: I hope its you.
Dr Green: You kids ready?
Chandler: Whatd you rent?
Rachel: (entering) Oh-ho, my God! That was so awesome! You totally got him back for calling you fat! He was just drooling all over you. That must've felt so great!
Joey: Cute! This is Janice! You remember Janice?
Rachel: No Yeah, all the time, constantly. It's terrifying. But you know that I figure it it has to work out.
Ross: Why did you do that?
Mona: I dont understand. You-you give me a key to your apartment and then you change the lock.
Rachel: Okay. Okay, we'll be here! Hating you! Did you see how he was sweating when he walked out of there? Listen honey, if I'm hogging the ball too much you just jump right in there and take a couple punches because I'm telling you, this feels great.
Monica: Oh! Oh my God! That is the most beautiful top of a head I have ever seen! Chandler, you have to see this!
Monica: I know, but you have to open it today! (Hands it too him.)
Joey: (looking around) You got me. I dont
VAN DAMME: Can't you see what's going on here, this man is dying.
Monica: What are you doing?
Rachel: Honey, stop it! I am not going to tell you until I tell him.
Monica: Did you break up with her?
Rachel: Oh! Thank you!
JOEY: (spots the suitcase just inside the door where Chandler left it) Whoa, whoa.� Wait a minute.� Wait a minute.� If you just got back from Tulsa, how did your suitcase beat you here?
Rachel: How come you are?!
Ross: That's so Janine, you-you-you know what, do you know we're doing right now? You and I, we're interfacing.
Phoebe: What are you talking about?
Caitlin: (laughs) Great. I'll see you later!
Rachel: Yeah, ohh! Why, damnit, why did I open my mouth? (In a girlish voice) I have a crush on you; I am attracted to you. (Back to normal again) Gee, I-I know that I freaked him out
Joey: Hey, youre ah, pretty good at this.
Ross: (takes a drink) Damn, this coffees cold! Hey Rach, do you mind if I heat this up on your loins? (Joey and he both laugh.)
Emily: So what are you saying? Its now or never?
Chandler: Because you kept talking to him while he was trying to go to the bathroom?!
Ross: Sure, what do you got?
Rachel: Joey, what are you talking about? Youre a terrific actor.
Joey: Will you pick one, just pick one! Here, how about that one? (points to a table)
Female Clerk: Can I help you?
Chandler: Do you have my credit card?
Phoebe: No, no, no, I actually it's any baby animals: kittens, fish babies... You know... especially veal... and this, this nice vein of fat running through it... (she cuts the meat, picks it up with her fork and holds it in front of her mouth, which she keeps closed, trying to overcome her vegetarian thoughts... and... puts it in her mouth... Clearly not enjoying the meat...) Hmmm... yummy (everybody seems okay with it, except Mike. He's making a hmmmm.... face... Then Phoebe swallows it) Hmmm... (at first she likes it, but then, in an instant puts her hand in front of her mouth and runs from the table. You hear a door slamming.)
Chandler: Ok, you can not do this to me.
Rachel: That is it! You just barge in here, you don't knock
Monica: Yeah! (They turn to the camera, and Chandler does The Face again.) All right, maybe you dont have to smile. Lets try something else. Lets try umm, try looking sexy.
Rachel: Well excuse me, my fashion-impaired friends, I am here to tell you that hats are back.
Julie: Thats why you broke up with me?
Chandler: Oh yeah, I just showed this a picture of you and guys were throwing themselves at me! Theyre buying me drinks! Theyre giving me stuff! (to Joey) Knicks tonight?
Ross: No! Okay! Okay! (Stops her.) Okay, look, can I, can I just-just talk to you for a second?
Rachel: Whoa! My God! So what, you all just joined together to hate me?! Who else was in this club?
Phoebe: Ice sculpture? That sounds really fancy! I told you I just want a simple wedding.
Chandler: Id carry you around in my pocket.
Elizabeth: Oh! Sorry! Umm, I actually do need to talk to you.
Rachel: You do? Why?
Carol: What do you mean?
Ross: You know what? That is a very good idea. I'm gonna go make a pitcher of Margaritas.
Phoebe: Youre the best. Thanks. Oh!
PHOEBE: Ok, I'll walk you out.
Joey: Oh, man, why did have to go and say that for? Now that you told me I can't have it makes me want her even more!
Chandler: So are you gonna...talk to her?
Rachel: Why?! What?! Are you kidding?!
MONICA: Hey, you know I got a question for ya. Just a little thing, no pressure.
Phoebe: (gasps) My God! What did you order?!
Joeys Date: You must be Rachel, Im Erin.
Joey: Well if you can't talk dirty to me, how're you going to talk dirty to her? Now tell me you want to caress my butt!
Chandler: You didnt bring me here to do that, did you?
Chandler: Well, that's what we do. Y'know, I-I mess up and then you tell me how to fix it and then I do and then y'know you think I'm all cute again.
David: -hard quality. And uh, while Daryl Hannah is beautiful in a conventional way, you are luminous with a kind of a delicate grace. Then, uh, that-that-that's when you started yelling. (Sits down)
Ross: I know! Im saying you have to watch them all the time.
Joey: You know what's crazy? These jars. What is it, like two bites in here?
Chandler: You said no right?!
Chandler: (laughs) You said no right?
The Teacher: Are you just repeating what I'm saying?
Ross: oh boy you got mad at that part. I went over there to tell him how great you are but you know me BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, and I ended up telling him that.
Monica: Maybe because it's you hung your head out of the window like a dog the whole ride here.
Chandler: Well, you can't just not see Rachel anymore, she's one of your best friends.
RACHEL: No.� No, because I know exactly how the conversation's gonna go.� "Hey Ross, you know, I think we had a moment before."
Monica: (entering with Erica and Chandler) Hey you guys.
Monica: (to the couple) Hi! Can you do that and walk? Cause she said, "Next."
Chandler: You cant just call Monicas room.
Joey: (to Phoebe) Hey, how you doin?
Phoebe: So Monica, what were you gonna tell us?
Buffay, the Vampire Layer: Ah, I thought Id find you here, Nasforatool.
Joey: Wait a second, I see what youre trying to do here! You-youre trying to give me money again!
(Cassie enters from the guest room, with her hair up. The extremely beautiful and sexy Denise Richards is playing Cassie. Woo hoo! For those of you who dont know who she is, rent Wild Things and she was also the last Bond girl in The World Is Not Enough.)
JOEY: Yeah, unless you hook up with a bunch of pigeons.
Joey: Can I tell you something? Me too.
Waiter #2: What are you doing? Are you trying to get him to stay? Because you can't do that.
Ross: (goes over to Julio) Come here, here, come here, come here, (pause) Mrs. Buffay. Sorry, about what I said, umm, it was, it was insensitive of me to say that you were just a cat. When clearly you are also the reincarnated spirit, of my friends mother.
Rachel: (To Ross) You know what? We should call my mum's house and say goodnight to Emma before she goes down.
Monica: No, you can't! Friends hooking up is a bad idea.
Ross: Hey, maybe I can fix that, you know. Try to turn it into something else. (he opens the box)
Phoebe: Didnt you sleep together?
Kim: Oh thats interesting? Because I checked and only one keycard was used to access the copy machine yesterday during lunch and that keycard belonged to you, Rachel.
Rachel: Look, Charlie, I just want you to know. Ross is just having a little trouble adjusting to the thought of Joey and me. You know, he normally doesn't drink like this.
Monica: So you had fun, huh?
Monica: Oh my god, Emma. Oh, sweetie, I forgot you were here. Oh, you're right, we can't do this. We can't leave her alone.
Monica: All right. Umm, you could uh start out with a little 1, a 2, a 1-2-3, 3, 5, a 4, a 3-2, 2, a 2-4-6, 2-4-6, 4, (Rachel starts getting worked up) 2, 2, 4-7, 5-7, 6-7, 7 7.. 7 7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7 (mouths 7)! (They both lean back on the couch satisfied.)
Rachel: Thank you judges.
Joey: Okay. See you guys later.
David: Still you know, a girl calls you by your ex-boyfriend's name, that-that's not a good thing, right?
Ross: Yes? Yes?! How can I help you?
The Director: But youre supposed to work on Monday.
Ross: You weren't trying to entice me with your nakedness.
Phoebe: Oh really? She said she wants to go away with you?
Joey: (entering the hall) Oh man! Aren't you guys done yet?! I wanna sit in my chair!
CHANDLER: Hey man, look it's my best bud. How ya doin? [Joey doesn't respond] Wow, you are really gettin' good at that Marcel Marceau thing. Hey, whaddya say uh, we play some ball, you and me, huh, whaddya say? [Throws a basketball to Joey. Joey doesn't move to catch it and the ball takes out a lamp] OK, that's my bad.
Mike: The woman I love... (he walks to Phoebe) I love you... Which is probably something I shouldn't say for the first time in front of my parents... and Tom and Sue...Who are by the way the most sinfully boring I've ever met in my life...