words in movies
Phoebe: Thank you! (to Rachel) Oh, and I have something for you!
Rachel: Oh, Pheebs, baby, that's nice but, you know what, I think I'm ok. Why don't you give it to one of your other single girlfriends?
Chandler: Hey, I'm sorry, I should have given you guys my black book when I got married! Although it wasn't so much a book as a... napkin. With Janice's phone number on it.
Chandler: Oh, then I'll tell you. My agency was bidding for a big account and they got it! It's my first national commercial!
Chandler: Yeah, and I don't wanna brag but a lot of the ideas were mine! (silence) Hell, you weren't there? All the ideas were mine!!!
Joey: That's great! Hey, can you cast me in it?
Joey: What do you mean? I can do anything, I'm a chameleon! Huh? (he mimes an old man with a beard) I'm old! (then he yawns) I'm tired! (then he mimes someone who's hot...) Hey, I'm hot (...and cold) I'm cold!! Huh?? Come on! What can't I do?
Ross: Guess who's a finalist for a huge research grant! I'll give you a hint, he's looking right at you.
Charlie: Wait. Are you talking about the Dewar grant?
Charlie: No, no, we ended up in great terms. I mean, if anything, I think this could help you. You know what? Why don't we all go out to dinner together, and I can introduce you.
Ross: Well, if you think it would help.
Ross: Ok, now, is there anything I can do to... you know, butter him up? Anything he really likes?
Monica: Hey, you wanna go to see a movie?
Phoebe: Well, I told you I had to spend all the day clearing out stuff, so Mike could move in.
Monica: Oh, well. Now that I'm here I might as well help you with the cleaning and organizing! Just happen to have my label maker!
Phoebe: Oh, it's so hard to get rid of stuff! Did you and Chandler have to make compromises when you first moved in together?
Monica: Uh, Chandler did! What does he want you to give up? Phoebe: A bunch of stuff. And the worst one... he wants me to get rid of Gladys.
Phoebe: Yeah. I really hate to give her up. Oh, I know!! Oh, you should take her!
Phoebe: Why, you don't like her?
Monica: Well, of course I do. What's not to like! I'll take her in a minute! But, you know, I think that you're giving up too easy, honey. I think that you need to fight for her!
Phoebe: Really? You think?
Monica: Absolutely! Yes, you say to him "I'm sorry Mike I can't live without her, she means too much to me!"
Phoebe: Ok, I'll fight for her. Ok! Oh, wait, oh I just realized... if I do that, that means you don't get her.
Chandler: Hey you guys.
Chandler: Joe, I told you, you're just not right for the part.
Joey: What do you mean? Rach, don't I seem like a professor you'd buy some kind of e-crap from?
Joey: Just watch it, and if you don't like it, you don't pass it on to your bosses!
Joey: Thank you. (he sits down)
Rachel: Just tell Joey that you watched the tape and you liked it, but your bosses didn't. Then that way, you're the good guy and they're the bad guys.
Ross: I can't believe I'm about to meet Benjamin Hobart. I've always thought of him as one of the people I'd invite to my fantasy dinner party. Do you think there's any chance he'll bring Christie Brinkley or C3PO?
Benjamin: Charlie! My God, you look absolutely stunning!
Benjamin: So good to see you.
Ross: It's an honor to meet you. I can't tell you how long I've been an admirer of your work, I mean, that Nobel prize, (he thumbs up) whoooo! I mean, I have to tell you that, you're one of the reasons I got into the field.
Benjamin: Oh, well, likewise. Actually, not likewise. I've never heard of you until this morning, but, it's nice to be nice!
Benjamin: (to Ross) Thank you! (to Charlie). I can't believe that you chose this restaurant! Do you remember the night?
Benjamin (to Ross): You weren't there!
Ross: No, but, it's, you know, it's just a funny image, you know, the two of you, in this restaurant, with... (laughs nervously)tzz-zzz, mmm.
Charlie: Ross, why don't you tell Benji about your proposal, while I go to the ladies room?
Ross: Did you just say "break up with Charlie"?
Ross: Kind of inappropriate, don't you think?
Benjamin: I'm sorry. I just haven't seen her for so long! All these feelings are rushing back! I'm starting to realize how much I missed her, and I'm gonna need you to break up with her.
Ross: Are you serious?
Benjamin: If you say yes then I'm serious, if you say no then I'm joking!
Monica: Hey, how did it go with Mike, is he gonna let you keep the painting?
Phoebe: No, he really hates it. But he's gonna let me keep my box of human hair! So you got to pick your battles. But the good news is, Gladys is yours!
Phoebe: Oh, she's that work of art I made, you know, with the woman coming out of the frame.
Phoebe: Oh, I didn't know you wanted her too!
Rachel: Well, I mean, sure, of course. But... you already gave that to Monica, so...
Monica: You know, I would give her up, for you.
Rachel: No, I couldn't let you do that.
Rachel: But I don't want you to.
Rachel: (sarcastic) No, no, that's ok. You won fair and square. I'm so sad!
Joey: (looks at him suspiciously) But, ehm... you watched the tape?
Joey: (sounds confident) You didn't watch the tape.
Chandler: I'm not lying to you, I watched it!
Joey: Well, you lied again! (Rachel comes out of her room and is observing the conversation)
Joey: (yelling back) No you didn't! (turns and goes towards his room)
Chandler: (following him) I'm telling you, I watched the tape. (Reaches Joey's room and Joey slams the door in his face)
Rachel: Did you watch the tape?
Benjamin: The selection committee has chosen the three of you as our finalists today. The ultimate decision will be based upon the answers you give to the questions I ask here. I'm gonna start with Dr. Li. Dr. Li, you claim the field is too reliant on the Linnaean taxonomic system. How do you propose to correct this problem?
Benjamin: No! I'm sorry, we were looking for "Baby It's You". Baby It's You.
Rachel: But you are a liar.
Joey: You still here?
Joey: Ok whoah-hey... Let me just stop you right there, ok? First, you lied, right? Then, you lied about lying, ok? Then you lied about lying about lying, ok? So before you lie about lying about lying about lying about... lying... (loses count and begins to count the number of 'lyings' in the air but gives up.) (yelling) Stop lying!
Chandler: Why are you so sure I didn't watch this tape?
Joey: (very angry) You wanna know wh...? You wanna know why? (goes back into his room)
Joey: (comes out holding the tape) Here's how I know you didn't watch the tape, ok? (puts it into the vcr) If you had seen what was on this tape, believe me, you would have some comments. Alright, now remember, I got paid a lot of money for this and it only aired in Japan. (presses play and he appears on the TV screen and a TV commercial begins)
Joey: (Yelling at Chandler) And that's how I know you didn't watch the tape! (goes back to his room and slams the door).
Rachel: (surprised by how ugly it is) Wow! (sarcastic) Oh, she's so nice and big! Oh, Monica, where are you going to display Gladys oh so proudly? (looks around for a spot)
Rachel: Well, hey! How about right above the TV? (Points to the spot where her famous French poster is hanging). That way, it will be the first thing that you see when you walk in the door!
Phoebe: (genuinely excited about it) Yeah, yeah! And you can get rid of that French poster.
Monica: (Impatient with Rachel) Are you still here?
Ross: Oh hi! Hello! Uh, have you come to ask me some more paleontology related questions? Uhm... your grandmother's nickname, perhaps? (Now yelling) Aunt Margaret's pants size?
Benjamin: Anyway, I've decided to offer you the grant.
Benjamin: Hey, you got one right!
Rachel: Alright, fine. You can keep it. As long as you don't mind that she's haunted.
Monica: No, too late. You can't give it back! (she pushes the painting back to Rachel)
Monica: No you can't. She's yours!
Phoebe: You guys! You guys! You don't have to fight over her anymore. (she goes out into the hallway and enters with an even more hideous painting/collage. One of those faceles mannequins heads wearing a blueish dress and orange gloves reaching out into the room. Around the head 3 small dolls are hovering.) Whoever doesn't get Gladys gets Glynnis. (Rachel and Monica are gasping for air at the sight of this monstrous piece of art.)
Chandler: Look, I'm sorry I didn't give them your tape. And I promise, next time to submit you whether I think you are right for the part or not.
Joey: That's not the point Chandler. The point is that you lied.
Chandler: I know. You're right. What's it gonna take for you to forgive me?
Joey: Now, what do you say?
Charlie: Did you get the grant?
Ross: No I didn't, and you want to know why? Because your ex-boyfriend is still in love with you.
Ross: Yeah. He wouldn't give me the grant, because I wouldn't give you up.
Ross: If you don't believe me, let's go talk to him, okay? I'm telling you, he didn't ask me one paleontological question.
Ross: Oh, I'm sorry, no. He did ask me one. Uhm... How do you spell Mboscodictiosaur?
Benjamin: Dr. Geller...? Charlie... What are you... what are you doing here?
Ross: I want you to tell her everything. About the deal you tried to make with me, about the crazy questions you... Wally Cox! That's the voice of Underdog!
Benjamin: Like I tried to tell you in the interview Ross, this grant is not based on your knowledge of pretty useless trivia.
Ross: No, no, no. Don't do that! I want you to look her in the eyes, and tell her the truth.
Benjamin: Alright, it's true. I behaved horribly. But it's only because I still love you. And I would do anything to have you back in my life.
Benjamin: I never should have broken up with you. I think about you all the time. I mean, do you ever still think about me?
Benjamin: Listen, I know, I may be way out of bounds here, but is there any chance you will take me back?
Charlie: Oh God! I am so sorry, but... (she puts her hand on Ross's cheek) I mean it's... there's so much history between us, you know...
Benjamin: I love you!
Charlie: I love you too! (and they start to kiss)
Phoebe: Yes, but I wanted you to want to live with me, but okay, if you're having so much fun over here
Chandler: Hey! Well, Ive been preparing for that my entire life! Or something about you thats mean!
Chandler: You think?
Monica: (gives her an envelope) Would you just open it?
Rachel: Would you excuse me for a second?
ROSS: How can you not believe in evolution?
Rachel: Look, I am so so happy for you guys, but you getting married just reminds me of the fact that Im not. Im not even close. And I dont know, maybe I just wanted to make myself feel better. And I know that thats dumb, but oh my God you were so depressed when Ross got married that you slept with Chandler!
Joey: Well, this is awkward. {See? I told you so.}
Phoebe: So how are things going with you?
Rachel: I cannot believe that after ten years, you do not know ONE thing about me.
Ross: Of course he is! What, do you think Id just use my son as-as an excuse? What kind of father do you think I am?
Joey: Thank you so much.
Phoebe: You sound like a guy.
Joey: Probably not. Nah. I don't know how much I'm gonna wanna play after you go.
Ross: Yknow what? I dont like you without mom. (To Joey) Come on. (Walks away.)
Phoebe: Oh yes. Yes. Yeahno. She did. She left you umm, (looking in her purse) this lipstick.
Phoebe: (yelling back) I miss you too!!!! (He walks away.)
Rachel: Yeah, you do.
Rachel: Yeah! You-you got the job! Youre my new assistant!
Mrs. Verhoeven's Daughter: You speak Dutch? (In Dutch) Zeer vereerd een vriend van mijn moeder te ontmoeten. (Translation: Im very honored to meet a friend of my mother.)
Joey: Oh really? Well, maybe you and I go out for drinks? (Pause) Youre the other one right? (She thinks about it for a second and nods yes.)
CHANDLER: But hey, it's courtside.� The cheerleaders are going to be right in fr. . . (Pause)� That's not the way to convince you.
Rachel: Because it took us months to find a good nanny and I wouldn't want anything to, you know, drive her away.
Rachel: You wanna go in the bedroom? Its a little more comfortable.
Joey: Umm, listen, Ross do you really think this moving in with Rachel is a good idea?
Ross: (talking agitated and angry) Everyone gets a goodbye but me? What have I got to do to get a goodbye, huh? Be best friends with you? Uh, go out with you? Have a baby with you? Oh wait a minute, wait a minute, I did all those things.
Joey: Pheebs! There you are!
Phoebe: Well, I didn't get embarrassed running next to Miss (panting). But no, okay. No, no, I can see why running with me would be embarrassing to you. Yeah, okay. You're uptight.
Ross: (shocked) (To Rachel) How did you know that?!!!!
Monica: Thank you. So what does this Bob guy look like? Is he tall? Short?
Phoebe: Ok, you weren't there.
Joey: Im so sorry. Look, if it was up to me you would never leave the show.
Rachel: But Pheebs, yknow you earned it.
Janice: What are you doing here?
Rachel: But I told you, I didnt have the time!
Phoebe: You don't need Janice for that, you've got us. We
Rachel: Ahhh, I think you look great! That bag is gonna get you that part.
Monica: Couldn't you just stay like this forever? (His eyes snap open.) Chandler! Couldn't you just stay here forever?
Ross: Smooth man. Yeah, you got some chilie on your neck. (Chandler checks and runs into the bathroom.) Well, I just want to say, thanks everyone, this-this was great. And hey! See you guys Monday morning. (They museum geeks wave at him.) Thanks Joey.
Janice: Are you being British?!
Rachel: You have! Ross, you should give yourself credit. I mean my Mom never thought this would work out. It was all, Once a cheater, always a cheater.
[Eddie leaves the room and Chandler mouths "Thank you" to himself]
Monica: And youve never been funnier. Joke, joke, joke, you were a hoot!
Ross: So, are you gonna see him again?
Ross: Yes. Yes. Yes! Yes, I really do! In fact, it's funny, very often, someone who you wouldn't think could-could curl your toes, might just be the one who...
Joey: Oh hey but, before you guys do that (To Rachel) I need to talk to you, and Ross, I need to talk to you.
Ross: Ive got to say; I know I divorce a lot of women, never thought I would be divorcing you.
Rachel: I mean, didn't you think you were just gonna meet somone, fall in love- and that'd be it? (Ross gazes at her.) ..Ross?
Phoebe: It was really sweet. The last thing she said to me was; "Okay dear, you go get the eggs and I'm gonna get the yogurt and we'll meet at the checkout counter." And y'know what? We will meet at the checkout counter.
Chandler and Rachel: You think?!
Chandler: Were you just ten seconds later!
Doctor: I can't believe you didn't know it's twins! This has never happened before.
Ross: What are you talking about?
Monica: '....Won't you, won't you, won't you.... '
Phoebe: (overacting badly) I cant! My circuits are fried! Theyre fried I tell you!!
Ross: And you know I wanted to ask Charlie out since the day I met her.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Listen umm, yeah okay, I need to talk to you!
Joey: (squinting his eyes) Are you kiddin'? I think I just saw a bat in the corner!
Chandler: Okay y'know what, because you said that, I'm not putting out tonight.
Chandler: Oh! Thanks, I'm crazy about our place. Hey! speaking of crazy... do you have a history of mental illness in the family?
Chandler: So, you don't think I'm terminal?
Rachel: (on the phone) Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it! (Pause) Im telling you Im quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now! (Pause) Yes I am! (Pause) Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when you get this message. (Hangs up as her boss, Mr. Waltham, walks in.) Oh! Mr. Waltham, I ah really need to talk to you.
Rachel: Hi. Thanks for the party, honey. Should I help you clean up?
Chandler: Do you think that theres a town in Missouri or some place called Sample? And ah, as youre driving into town theres-theres like a sign, and it says Youre in Sample. (He says it like urine sample.)
CHANDLER: Ahhhh-gaaaahhh. Eddie what're you still doin' here?
Phoebe: As a masseuse and a human, I'm begging you, never do that to anyone!
PHOEBE: Yeah, I see what you mean.� By the way, nice Ross imitation.
Chandler: Hey, you have nothing but talk about her for the last 48 hours! If you were in a school yard youd be pulling her pigtails and pushing her down now!
Rachel: Wait a minute! (To Monica) You let Ross drive the Porsche and when I ask you, you say youre the only one whos allowed to drive it.
Mike: oh it's just you have that look (shuts the front door)
Frank: How are you?
Joey: Well, right after I did that sex study down at NYU. (to Chandler) Hey, Remember that sweater I gave you for your birthday?
Ross: Thank you.
Joey: (smiling) Now let's not ruin this day. You worked so hard. Let's move past this and try to have a nice meal all together, huh?
Jill: Oh great! Thanks Ross, youre such a good friend!
Joanna: Would you? Or, is it just to sad and desperate, and y'know something that Sophie would do?
Phoebe: But are you saying that you would move out if I didnt buy that lamp?
Rachel: Okay! (Picks up the phone and starts dialing.) (In an Irish accent) "Hello Ross, this is Dr. McNeeley from the Fake Accent University, wed like you to come on board with us full time! (Hangs up.)
Ross: Hey, what are you doing shopping at eight in the morning?
Joey: And the best part is, we're filming in the desert outside Vegas! (To Chandler) And you know what that means buddy!
Joey: But youre still moving in together, right? Because my ad came out today. (Shows him the paper.)
Phoebe: Oh, theres a cab! Taxi!! (The cab stops and she opens the door.) Good timing, my God, huh? Here you go. (Pushes Rachel in and closes the door.)
Ross: Oh-oh-okay, but-but I know, that even though I've been a-a complete idiot up 'til now, I mean, I mean you-you-you have to come here. You have to come here so we can work this out.
Monica: Have I read it? (pause) No, are you enjoying it?
Joey: (to Kate) Ah, are you okay?
Monica: If you want, I'll do it.
Ross: (following them into the kitchen) What are you guys doing?
Rachel: Oh okay, hey guys, would you flip mine too?
Monica: Are you trying to tell me that were moving to Oklahoma, or that youre gay? All right, not that this matters, but did they at least offer you a huge raise?
Joey: You know, ah, Ive been thinking about this and I gotta tell ya, its not my fault. Its a natural instinct.
Joey: If you didnt want to play, why did you come to the party?
Monica: I just asked you.
Joey: What? What the hell am I doing? You just broke my fridge!
Devon: So good then! Well see you at Riverside Park at 2:00! Cheers!
Ross: Look, I just think you're an adult, okay? And you should get over your silly fears.
EDDIE: You, you want, you want me to move out?
Ross: (he picks up the ball) What do you think you learnt how to do in the last two minutes?? (he enters another room)
Rachel: How... wha... Hey! What are you... What is this? Have you guys been listening this entire time?
Monica: See ya.... Waitwait, what's with you?
Matt: Sometimes the dialogue itself is just so funny and youllwell be rehearsing during the week and you justwhatever-whatever the joke is; its so funny we cant get through it in rehearsal and just