words in movies
Monica: Hey Hon, could you help me get the plates down?
Monica: <laughs> Oh yeah, like I'm going to let you talk to the queen.
Chandler: Aren't you one of the stars of the popular daytime soap Days of Our Lives?
Chandler: What are you going to do?
Joey: I guess I'm going to have to come up with a really good reason why I wasn't there. The producers are going to be so mad at me. They sat us all down yesterday and said "Everyone has to be there at 6:00 AM sharp, that means you Tribbiani." Like.. like I was some kind of idiot.
Chandler: Well you proved them wrong.
Rachel to Emma: Oh Emma. This is going to be your first Thanksgiving. What are you thankful for? Mommy's bobbies.
Amy: Do you have a hair straightener?
Rachel: I haven't seen you in like.. a year.
Rachel: Oh.. yeah? Well unless you pushed a desk out of your vagina, <shakes head no> not the same thing.
Rachel: Oh Amy, you remember Ross.
Amy: Not really. But you are much cuter then that geeky guy she used to date.
Amy: No, I'm not talking about you. <to Rachel> It was your fat friends brother with that bad afro, do you remember?
Ross starts talking over her 'do you remember' line: Amy. I'm going to save you some time, ok. <spins finger around in circle> All me.
Chandler: I'll tell you what, for the rest of our lives, I'll be careful until told otherwise. <looks at china> hey wait a minute this isn't the china we picked out..
Monica: I know, after you left the store, I chose different ones.
Phoebe: Oh okay. How about the whole "man walking on the moon" thing. You know? You. you could. You could see the strings people!
Phoebe: Ooh, honey. You stink at lying.
Phoebe: Oh really. Okay. let me ask you something. Yesterday at the coffee house, I went to the bathroom and when I came back, my muffin was gone-who took it?
Joey: Somebody opened the door to the coffee house and a raccoon came running in, went straight for your muffin and I said "Hey don't eat that-that's Phoebe's" and he said.. <pause> He said.. "Joey you stink at lying." What am I going to do?
Phoebe: Don't worry, don't worry. We'll come up with a good lie. I'll help you practice it.
Joey: Oh great, that'd be great. Thank you.
Amy with straight hair: Oh she's precious. Do you ever worry she's going to get your real nose?
Amy: Seriously? Its.. its just these rooms? <moves hands around motioning 'just these rooms'> <To Ross> I thought you were a doctor.
Rachel: Oh sure Ross, yeah. If I have a heart attack in a restaurant, I want you there with your fossil brush.
Rachel: Oh Amy, don't cry Amy. Um.. Ross, could I talk to you in private?
Ross: Sure, you want to go upstairs?
Ross: You know, I think thats a great idea. It'll be like the pilgrims bringing the Indians syphilis.
Rachel: Ross, you know what? She may need one..We're just going to have to make our peace with that!
Rachel: Hey you guys, this is my sister Amy. This is Chandler, Joey, Phoebe and you know Mon.
Amy: wow. They must put a lot of makeup on you.
Monica to Emma: Hey you.
Amy with confused look on face: Yeah I.. I think so. <sticks her hand out to shake hands with Phoebe and says to her> It's nice to meet you Emma.
Phoebe: Oh right, ok um. Ok so its not just the lie you tell. but its the way you tell it. . For example if you look down at the ground when you're talking, people know you're lying.
Joey: Oh.. I don't know why this is so hard for me. you know.. I mean lying is basically just acting and I am a terrfic actor.
Phoebe looks down: You are a terrific actor.
Amy: Oh I was just thinking. You know what would be incredible? If you guys died.
Ross first has a look of 'huh' then changes it to sarcastic happy: Thank you Amy.
Amy: no, no, then I would get the baby. I mean you know it would be just like a movie. Like at first I wouldn't know what to do with her, then I would rise to the occasion and and then I would get a makeover and then I'd get married.
Amy: Now listen, not that you guys could stop me or anything cause you know you'd be dead. I was thinking about changing her name. I'm just not really a big fan of Emily. [Transcriber note: I'm surprised that Rachel and Ross didn't say they weren't either here]
Amy turns around to Phoebe: Emma, Ross wants you.
Rachel: Honey, I don't know how to tell you this, but um, if something were to happen to Ross or to myself <Ross and Rachel knock on wood> um you wouldn't get the baby.
Amy: I don't believe this, hold on a second. You guys die and I don't get your baby?
Rachel: See look Amy, we're a lot closer to Monica and Chandler. We see them every day. And truthfully honey, you don't seem very connected to the baby.
Chandler: You know, guys I got to say. This means so much to me. That you would trust me with your child. I mean, we all know that Monica and I have been trying to have a baby of our own. You know I've had my doubts about my skills as a father, but that you two.. that you two.... <starts to cry>
Joey: Hey! How come my plate's less fancy then everyone else's? Do you not trust me with a fancy plate?
Amy: Its such a slap in the face. I'm your sister and you would give your baby to these strangers over me.
<Amy gets pissed and starts cutting food on the fancy plate very harshly, you can hear the silveware scraping the fancy plate>
Monica about to have a heart attack: Okay, listen I know you're having a little bit of a family crisis, but you don't have to take it out on the plates. I mean, I mean in fact I think that everyone should cut their food like this.
Monica: Now see, this way you protect the plate.. and lets face it you have fun.
Amy: Okay, how about this, you guys die and the crazy plate lady dies, then do I get the baby?
Chandler: Well what is wrong with me? Am I .. am I incomptent? Because I managed to survive whatever it is that killed the three of you!
Monica: Thats not how you see me, is it?
Chandler: Look, I may not know a lot about babies, but do you really think I'm not capable?
Ross: No, you both are equally capable. Its just.. you're strongest when.. when you're together.
Monica: Hey. There you are. You disappeared after dinner.
Monica: No you learn these things. You grow into it.
Monica: I don't know it! I want to have a kid with you because I think you're going to be an amazing dad... at the fun parts and the hard parts.
Chandler: Oh yeah, well can you picture me saying "Go to your room! You're grounded"?
Monica: Can you hear me say "You're grounded"?
Chandler: You said that to me last week.
Phoebe: It's ok. I thought of the perfect lie for you. It's easy to remember and doesn't invite a lot of questions. You weren't at the parade because you had a family emergency.
Monica: Oh wait.. What are you doing?
Ross: Hey dude, you okay? Sorry about before.
Chandler: Oh no thats okay, you're totally right. I don't know anything about disciplining a child. But it did hurt my feelings and I want you to know that when I die, you don't get Joey.
Amy walks over to the couch and sits down next to Rachel: Ucch. <pauses> Uchh <louder this time> In case you hadn't noticed, I'm not talking to you.
Amy: You know.. this.. this is classic Rachel.
Rachel: Yeah.. yeah right.. Remember in high school when I died and didn't give you my baby?
Amy: This might be my one chance to have a baby Rachel. I mean, you know that I have been so busy focusing on my carrer.
Rachel: Ok. You decorate dad's office and so now you're a decorator. Okay! I went to the zoo yesterday and now I'm a koala bear.
Amy: Why can't you ever be supportive?
Rachel: Sup.. You want to talk supportive? You didn't even come and visit me when I was in the hospital having the baby.
Amy: Oh. Yeah. Well.. You didn't come see me when I was in the hospital when I was getting my lips done.
Rachel: I did the first time! Oh. Oh.. <gets up and walks into the kitchen> And you know what. You want to know why I'm not giving Emily to you.
Rachel turns to Ross: Oh whose side are you on? <back to Amy> I'm not giving you Emma because there is no way you could handle the responibility of a child.
Amy: How hard could it be? You do it.
Amy: Do you want to know why you don't want me to have the baby?
Amy: Because you don't want me to be happy. You.. you have always been jealous of me.
Rachel: Jealous of what? Of your lack of responsiblity? You, your immaturity? Your total disregard of other people's feelings?
Amy: Uh.. To name a few. You know.. You know.. You've just always been like this. You just have to have everything. And I couldn't have anything. Like in junior high, when you stole Timmy from me. I mean, do you even realize how much that hurt me?
Rachel: Timmy was my boyfriend and you made out with him!
Rachel: I cannot, I cannot believe that I invited you here today.
Amy: Yeah, well you know what I cannot believe. That my so-called sister, gets a 30% discount from Ralph Lauren and I still have to pay retail.
Amy: You bitch. You just think you're so perfect. With your new baby and your, your small apartment. <directs this to Ross who in turns throws the towel in his hand down on the table> Well let me tell you something. Your baby isn't even that cute.
Rachel: You take that back.
Amy: No! What are you going to do? Make me?
Rachel: Did you just push me?
Joey: What? Are you out of your mind? Lets throw some jello on them.
Chandler: Alright! That is it. This is our apartment and you can not behave this way. Now if you can't act your age then you shouldn't be here at all. Now those plates may not be as nice as the pretty pink ones I picked out, but they're very important to Monica. I want you to apologize to her right now.
Chandler: Okay. Thats better. Now I want you to both apologize to each other and mean it.
Ross: Dude. Well done. You know what? If I die, and Rachel dies and Monica dies then you can totally take care of Emma.
Chandler: Okay, but you should know he eats five times a day and shoves pennies up his nose.
Rachel: Are you okay Mon?
Phoebe: It's all right. You can mourn.
Monica starts crying: Thank you. It was so beautiful. <gets up and walks towards the front door> I'm going to go to Joeys and get the pies.
Rachel: Look Amy, it got a little of control..Um.. and I'm sorry. You're my sister and uh.. if it really means that much to you..
Rachel: Uh. No.. I was going to let you use my Ralph Lauren discount.
Amy starting to cry: You are not going to regret this.
Chandler: Oh no no no.. I'll get her. I'm super-compentent and totally responsibile and fourth in line to raise Emma. I'll be right there Emma. Just let me get my trusty diaper bag here. <knocks over the box of china> Well.. what do you know? I guess, I'll be the one who dies first.
Phoebe: You gonna tell her?
Chandler: Nope... (Monica walks in) Hey... so I'm gonna... put the plates back. You know, I think you were right, I don't think we should use these plates again for a looong time.
Joey: Oh, you told her you broke all the plates, huh? (Chandler walks back, looking angrily at Joey)
Rachel: Well, maybe you didnt want it to end?
Mrs. Bing: (To phone) Okay, thank you. (To Ross) It's the Italian Hand-Licker, isn't it.
ROSS: Yeah, you really sidestepped that land mine.
Monica: You just wanna each take one?
Gunther: Well, if you want, you can work here.
Frannie: You had sex, didn't you?
Billy: Like when you go bowling and you know youre in somebody elses shoes?
Joey: Come on, I mean, you know me, you know...
Monica: (to Phoebe) Would you stop?
Phoebe: Ooh, yeah. Then what are you going to put on top of that?
RUSS: Hey, you listen.
Joey: You got all that from the back of her head?
Ross: You were at the coffeehouse!
ROB: You OK?
Chandler: Yes...Yes..Uh-huh, You?(Looking over at her. She looks back.) We did you.
ROSS: Rach, come on, look, I know how you must feel.
Rachel: Ross, thank you. Hey, do you guys wanna go see a movie?
Rachel: Monica, you broke up with him for a reason.
Ross: No! Hey, you know what? I'm sorry. I would never force you... to hire someone you were this uncomfortable with...
Chandler: You are, youre gonna leave me like this?
Erin: Look, hes a really great guy and I know that you really want this to work out, but I just dont see this having a future.
FBOB: You too.
Kim: You didnt cancel the fabric order from Taiwan?
Phoebe: There we go.You know what, if we were in prison, you guys would be, like, my bitches.
JOEY: You gave him cookies?
Phoebe: Well look, you dont really like the one from uptown and youre too exhausted from dating the one up in Poughkeepsie, so I say you just end them both. Okay? You take a train up to Poughkeepsie and break up with her, and on your way back you break up with uptown. And then by the time you get home tonight, youre done!
Rachel: Ok, good-bye you guys. Thanks for everything. (she starts to leave, and hits everyone with her skis) Oh, sorry! Oh, sorry!
MONICA: Well, what made you make the exception for me?
Monica: I want you to know, it wasn't me who turned you in.
Phoebe: I know! (points at herself) Evil! And... and... and... I like Mike so much, you know. It's just going really well. Oh my God!
Chandler: Well, you can see my dad in Vegas kissing other dads.
Boy in the Cape: You cant tell me to shut up!
Joey: Yeah, you shoulda been there last night.
Kate: Im soo glad I caught you, I couldnt find you before.
Monica: You guys are always hanging out in my apartment! Come on, I'll only use my left hand, huh? Come on, wussies! (Joey and Chandler pick her up) All right, ok, I gotta go. I'm going, (they throw her out) and I'm gone.
JOEY: It's not what you think, that was...
Ross: Because she's just going to shoot me down. You guys saw what happened with Gunther. That did not look like fun.
Ross: Its like that everywhere, Joey! Okay, Mon, back me up here. Where you work the uh, waiters eat with the waiters, right? And the chefs eat with the other chefs, right?
JOEY: Yeah right after we stole his lunch money and gave him a wedgie. What's the matter with you, he's parking the car.
Monica: Yeah could-could-could you get me something to drink?
Chandler: No! That was a test! In a couple of hours Im gonna get really drunk and wanna call Kathy and you guys are gonna have to stop me! And then after that, Im gonna get so drunk, Im gonna wanna call Janice
Mrs. Geller: Were sorry honey, but we just assumed if you got married after you turned 30 youd pay for it yourself.
Monica: Hold it! Are you talking about Dick Clarks New Years Rocking Eve?
Chandler: Here you go. (Shows her the number again.)
Ross: And what did he ask you not to call him?
Monica: Oh, what a great argument, exhaling! All right, y'know what, Ill prove it to you, okay. Ill trade you Joey for Rachel, and Ill still win the game.
Joey: Oh, uh, okay, how, how about now? (He waves his hand in front of the woman next to him and you can now see his arm on TV.)
Ross: Okay, all right, Ill take you. Ill go call Joan. (Does so.)
Chandler: Oh no-no Joey, I am not going to tell you because I am an excellent secret keeper.
Joey: How could you not remember that we slept together?
Joey: You wont boss me around anymore?
Jim: Oh also, you might be interested to know that I have a Ph.D.
Joey: Because you two were having sex!
Chandler: No-no, why dont you hang on to that one.
Monica: We’re waiting for the adoption lady, but, hey, I’m glad you’re here. I was cleaning this morning and I found this (she puts a box on the table and opens it). I don’t know if you wanna use it, but…
Rachel: Yeah honey you dont believe her do you?
Ross: Yup! You could plunk me down in the middle of any woman's uterus, no compass, and I can find my way out of there like that! (snaps fingers)
Rachel: It was ... (can't remember) oh my god. He didn't have a last name. It was just "Tag". You know, like Cher, or, you know, Moses.
Mr. Geller: We started saving again when you were dating Richard and then that went to hell, so we redid the kitchen.
Phoebe: Are you sure? Because I'm really dreading going to this party.
Ross: Thats what you said last night.
Chandler: You cant leave! I have your shoe!
MONICA: What did you say?
PHOEBE: Oh, you just know.
ROSS: Good for you.
Rachel: Ok I gotta tell ya, it's really weird when you use my whole name.
Ross: You too! What are the odds?
RACHEL: Wow. Wow, that's great. Great. Ok, wow, you know what.
PHOEBE: And you hate fish. Oh. That's so sweet, alright. Ok, alright, you can see. This is me... [she unveils herself right as a huge lightning bolt crashes outside. Ryan screams in terror.] Oh, I am scary.
Monica: Hey, how long are you in the city?
Rachel: Yes, Joey, I remember, she's annoying, but you know what she's-she's his girlfriend now. I mean what can we do?
Joey: Yeah! You gotta tell a girl before you tape her. Such a rookie mistake.
RACHEL: Oh that's what you want.
Chandler: (to Phoebe) You know what's weird. Donald Duck never wore pants. But whenever he's getting out of the shower, he always put a towel around his waist. I mean, what is that about?
RACHEL: Wow you, you. I had no idea.
Ross: What?! That's not gonna make you any money!
Joey: Hey what do you say, we move this onto the likes of the couch?
CHAN: So what'd you do?
Gunther: Oh, Ross? Ross! You can't put up flyers in here.
Ross: Actually, do you guys mind staying here for a while?
Mr. Geller: Wait, how do you zoom out? (zooms out and we see an extremely overweight Monica eating a big sandwich) There she is.
Phoebe: I just wish there was something we could do. (Bends down and talks to him) Hello. Hello, Coma Guy. GET UP, YOU GIRL SCOUT! UP! UP! UP!
Chandler: I think I know what you mean though...the lamp is the hotel's, but the bulbs (goes to take the bulb)...oh, you already got that.
Ross: You know, there's nothing wrong with speaking correctly.
CHANDLER: What, what's what you mean?
Rachel: Absolutely! Absolutely. I d... it’s just a little weird, it’s you, and it’s me, it's just gonna take some getting used to.
Ross: So youre strong enough to face her on your own?
Joey: Well, either you break it off with Ronni
Monica: I mean dont you trust her?
Ross: Emma left her stuffed t-rex at my house. You know she can’t sleep without it.
Ross: Youve got to be kidding me!
Rachel: You know the book says that whenever shes sleeping I should be sleeping so (She gives Monica thumbs and goes to lay down)
PHOEBE: Ok, I didn't see it, because I was putting on my jacket, but I uh want to believe you.
Ross: You have to tell her! You have to tell her! It's your moral obligation, as a friend, as a woman, I think it's a feminist issue! Guys? Guys? (waiting for guys to chime in)
Rachel: Thank you! Youre great! (They kiss.)
Ross: What? Whoa, whoa whoa whoa, what do you mean, back to Jordie? We never landed on Jordie. We just passed by it during the whole Jessy, Cody, Dylan fiasco.
Rachel: I'm so sorry, you guys. I didn't mean to bring you down.
Monica: Okay! Okay! We can take a hint! (They start to leave but run into Phoebe with her guy in tow.) (To Phoebe) What are you doing here?!
Phoebe: Oh no, I dont believe in Western medicine. No, if you just apply pressure to these points right here. (Shes pinching the bit of skin between her right thumb and forefinger with her left hand.) Then your hand starts to hurt and you still have a headache, so thanks. (Takes the pills.)
RACHEL: Ohh, thank you for my beautiul earrings, they're perfect. I love you.