words in movies
Phoebe: Why? Just 'cause you're too lazy to get up off your touchie?
Chandler: I know. Can you believe it? One year ago today I was just your annoying friend Chandler.
Rachel: (takes off her robe) Oh! Look what happened! {Don't get your hopes up guys, we only get to see her from the back or from the neck up. Its times like these I wish that the networks would broadcast some nudity other than Denis Franz's butt.} (In her head.) Huh, check me out! I'm in my kitchen naked! I'm picking up an orange. (Does so) I'm naked! (Goes into the living room) Lighting the candles, naked, and carefully. (She backs anything that might have a point like a candle on her body away.)
Ross: You weren't trying to entice me with your nakedness.
Rachel: Ohh wow! Im sorry, but Ross you kicked off your shoes!
Chandler: Love your condoms my man.
Phoebe: Y'know Monica you had a minor setback in your relationship with Chandler. Big deal! It's only Chandler. (Monica turns and stares at her.) I am so sorry.
Phoebe: So go fix it! Go find Chandler! He's probably up in your room! Tell him that you're sorry and that you love him.
The Croupier: Comin' out. Place your bet. (Monica does so.) Dice are out. (The woman next to Monica rolls the dice.) Double or nothin'! Pay the front line! (Monica won and doubled the chip.)
Chandler: Are you sure you weren't (pause) looking at your hands in a mirror?
The Flight Attendant: (To Rachel) Thank you! (Not sure of herself) Enjoy your flight?
Ross: No. They swoop in and steal your jackpot.
Joey: Who's your friend? He's hot! (Ross laughs and Rachel smacks him with her purse.)
Ross: Your what?
Chandler: Come on! I was there! (He's propped up with his hand on a statute of a naked guy. He winces and pulls his hand away.) I know he's the love of your life.
Ross: (on the phone) Yes, hello. I have a question. Umm, I used your pen to draw on my friend's face. (Listens) A beard and a moustache. (Listens and laughs) Thank you. (Rachel turns around and glares at him.) No, she didn't think so. (Listens) I know it's like (turns and sees Rachel staring at him and quickly changes the subject) anyway, umm well make-up didn't cover it and we've tried everything to get it off and nothing's worked. What-what do we do? (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Oh! Okay. (Listens) Okay, thank you! (Rachel gets excited at his tone.) (Hangs up the phone) Yeah, it's not coming off.
Ross: Look, just because some idiot drew on your face doesn't mean you shouldn't have any fun! Okay? And besides, hey-hey-hey no one is even gonna look at you. Okay? This is Vegas! Hello! There are tons of other freaks here! (Rachel turns around and glares at him.) There are tons of freaks here. No other. No. Come on! No one will notice, I swear!
Joey: (stopping him) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa-whoa! We could have our own show! Y'know we could clap our hands together people will love it! Huh? And-and-and I wrote a song for us! (Singing, to the tune of This Land is Your Land) This hand is your hand! This hand is my hand! Oh wait, that's your hand! No wait, it's my hand!
Monica: Pick a number! That is your only job!
Monica: That could be a four or a five. It's your call.
(Cue up the music as they move in and kiss. This time I think it's Perry Como, but I'm not sure. It's Everybody loves somebody, sometime! Everybody falls in love somehow! Something in your kiss, just told me, my sometime, is now!)
Phoebe: Be cool! (They both pretend to have a nice conversation as the guard walks by, but after he leaves they both start fighting again.) Okay lady, your lurking days are over!
Phoebe: Yeah, from now on everyone you lurk, I'm gonna lurk first! You move on to someone else, I'm gonna be one step ahead of you, every single time! And then I'll be on your ass every hour of every day 'til Monday, because that's when I go home. When do you leave?
Ross: I'll do it. Hey, whatever you need me to do, I'm your man. (He starts to sit down on the bed. There's one problem though, he's about two feet to the left of it. Needless to say, he misses and falls on his butt.) (Looking up at Joey.) Whoa-oh-whoa! Are you, are you okay?
Chandler: No, we'll-we'll bring it back! Just put it under your dress.
Joey: Me?! Oh come on, man! You can't do this! Come on! (Being dragged out by the guard) I'm your hand twin!!
CHANDLER: See ya. [shuts the door] Goodbuy you fruit drying psychopath. So you want me to help you unpack your stuff?
Joey: Uh, Pheebs we kinda need you to drive us all up there in your grandmothers cab, but y'know what, Ill stay.
Monica: Dad, Chandler was just laughing at your joke.
Phoebe: Oh hey, Monica, I heard you saw Donald Trump at your convention.
Rachel: So Pheebs, what do you want for your birthday?
Rachel: You get your messages!
Joey: Oh there is! If you want something enough and your heart is pure, wondrous things can happen!
Kathy: Can I borrow the keys to your apartment?
Phoebe's Assistant: Oh, here comes your 3:00. I don't mean to sound unprofessional, but, yum (walks out, Paolo enters)
MRS. GELLER: It seems your daughter and Richard are something of an item.
Allesandro: I want to talk to you about your review.
Doug: Whats going on Bing? Does uh, your wife have a problem with me or something?
Rachel: Yknow what Tag, if we went down to the office you would see those contracts sitting on your desk.
RACHEL: Oh, what a load of crap. That is a dot. Your mother is up in heaven going, 'Where the hell is my lily, you wuss?' OK, Phoebe, that is not a tattoo, this is a tattoo. [she bends over and bears her tattoo right when Ross returns]
Phoebe: Hey, hey, ok, all right, that's it! Get in here. Come on. My god, you guys, I don't believe you. There are children coming into the world in this very building and your negative fighting noises are not the first thing they should be hearing. So just stop all the yelling, just stop it!
PHOE: Although, you know what? You might want to consider wearing underwear next time. Yeah, cause when you sat down on your throne you could kind of see your... royal subject.
Phoebe: Oh really? What was your first?
Rachel: (smiling) Joey, why don't you just tell her what happened? It's not your fault.
Phoebe: Being pregnant is tough on your tummy.
Dr. Harad: Hi! Phoebe, I'm Dr. Harad, I'm going to be delivering your babies. I want you to know, you're gonna be in good hands. I've been doing this for a long time. I'll be back in a minute to do your internal, in the meantime, just relax because everything here looks great. And also, I love Fonzie. (Exits)
Man: So we never got to hear about your wedding!
Ross: Yknow your probably not allowed to sleep with any of your students.
Gary Collins: Welcome back to our fall telethon. Now if you've been enjoying the performance of Cirque Du Soleil, (As he is speaking, Joey and the volunteer getting into a shoving match.) and you'd like to see more of the same kind of programming, it's very simple. All you have to do (Joey is knocked down.) is call in your pledge and at that time tell the operator, one of our volunteers, what kind of programming you'd like to (Just as the volunteer sits down, Joey pulls him to the ground.)
Dr. Franzblau: It is nice to meet you. I'm Dr. Franzblau. I'm your roommate's... brother's... ex-wife's obstetrician.
Monica: So you talked to your dad, huh.
Rachel: (reading what he wrote again) "Dear Rach, youre a great person. Sorry about your tiney-wienie." (Will laughs.)
RYAN: Your face could be covered with lochs, I wouldn't care.
Chandler: Phoebe found your pregnancy test in the trash.
Gavin: I thought it was ok when you slept with your old assistant Tag.
Susan: Your son.
Mrs. Geller: (incredulous) You dont know how that happened?! Your dog thought my diaphragm was a chew toy!
Sarah: (laughing) No. If I can't have your clams, you can't have my dessert. This is a two way street.
Kathy: Not your type?! She's gorgeous!
Joey: (Hes recorded his voice on the tape) Joeys your best friEnd. You want to make him a cheese sandwich everyday. (he laughs) And you also want to buy him hundreds of dollars worth of pants.
Flight Attendant: May I see your boarding pass?
Chandler: Well, listen I ah, still have one more person to ah meet, but unless it turns out to be your sister, I think youre chances are pretty good. (Eric offers to shake hands) All right. (Chandler hugs him.)
Chandler: (to Phoebe) It must take you forever to find your keys.
Rachel: What, what, so that you can dance with the woman that stole your credit card?
Rachel: Your parents?
CHANDLER: Eddie, I didn't sleep with your ex-girlfriend.
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel is closing up and Ross comes in. Get your Kleenex.]
Monica: Listen umm, I've been thinking, it's not fair for me to ask you to spend all of your money on our wedding. I mean, you work, you work really hard for that.
Janice: Oh my God. You listen to me, Chandler, you listen to me. One of these times is just gonna be your last chance with me. (She runs off)
Chandler: Your pants!
Mackenzie: This is what my mom was talking about. Whiners are wieners. (Joey glares at her angrily) Look, you want your friends to be happy, right?
RICHARD: No, it's been a long time since your dad and I went running.
Chandler: All right look, Im changing it to 50 bucks, or your best offer.
RADIO: The next one's dedicated to Rachel from Ross. Rachel, he wants you to know he's deeply sorry for what he did and he hopes you can find it in your heart to forgive him. (With or Without You plays)
Mr. Geller: Well, the garage flooded sweetie and it ruined everything in your boxes. Im sorry.
Roger: Actually it's, it's quite, y'know, typical behaviour when you have this kind of dysfunctional group dynamic. Y'know, this kind of co-dependant, emotionally stunted, sitting in your stupid coffee house with your stupid big cups which, I'm sorry, might as well have nipples on them, and you're like all 'Oh, define me! Define me! Love me, I need love!'.
Joey/Drake: Can you really live the rest of your life never knowing what we could have been?
Chandler: (to Monica) Take off your shirt!
Monica: You bet your ass, Im gonna fire you! Thank you.
Chandler: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What is all this pressure?! Is this some new kind of strategy? Why dont you put down your copy of The Rules huh mantrap?!
Chandler: (To Monica) Have I got a surprise for you? Pack your bags!
Monica: Well, I don't care! That-that turkey has to feed 20 people at my parent's house and they're not gonna eat it off your head!
Dr. Franzblau: So, I understand you're thinking of having a baby? Well, I see you're nine months pregnant. That's a good start. How you doing with your contractions?
Phoebe: Oh let me guess, and you wanna have them all at the same time and you wanna have them for your brother.
Ross: (I can't make it out.) The uh, your hair, before, your hair, you said you thought your looks like an 8-year-old's, and I'm just saying I like it. The hair.
David: Well, it got me to New York anyway, and then I got on a cab at the airport, and the guy said where to? and I just... gave him your address I... I... I didn't even think about it.
Ross: Mon, look at yourself. You have cookie on your neck.
JANITOR: It's about your monkey. It's alive.
Rachel: Rachel Green's office!! Give me that phone! (takes the phone) Hello, this is Rachel Green, how can I help you? Uh huh ... ok then ... I'll pass you back to your son (gives phone to Gavin)
Joey: Oh, hey, dont forget your shirt.
JANICE: And what? Missed the expression on your face? Janice likes to have her fun.
Chandler: I'd just like to say that I'm totally behind this experiment. In fact, I'd very much like to butter your head.
RYAN: Can I please see your face?
Rachel: Yeah. Your teeth? Yes, I saw them from outside. (Sitting down on the couch.) You guys are never going to believe this. But, Phoebe made out with Ralph Lauren.
JOEY: Uh, hey, Dr. Greene, why don't you come with me, we'll put your jacket on Rachel's bed.
Monica: (as Rachel) Remember back in freshman year? (Talking fast before Rachel can catch her) Well, Billy Dreskin and I had sex on your bed.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is still doing the hairball thing as Monica and Phoebe are watching the babies. I cant describe it, youll have to see it when it comes on in your area.]
Phoebe: Well, I heard youre having a problem with one of the boys in your class. And so I thought I would just come down here and sit you both down, have a little talk and make it all okay. Now umm, the boys name is Stings son.
Joey: Hey Monica its Joey. Listen uh, Phoebe and I smell gas comin from your apartment.
Ross: I got tenure. I didn't win the lottery... Hey Rach, so uh... how did your thing go?
Phoebe: Not great, but we can work on it at lunch. Okay, I can be at your apartment in two hours.
Chandler: We heard you play all the way from your apartment!
Phoebe: You know.. you let your guard down, you start to really care about someone, and I just- I- (starts chewing her hair)
Monica: Oops! (Covers its eyes.) Yknow, your birthday is in a month-and-a-half, what do you say I forget to get you a present for that too?
CHANDLER: Weird world. Your kids?
Sleep Clinic Worker: Your name, please?
Chandler: You put your fist through the wall?
Chandler: Relax your hand!
Rachel: Yes, they will! You know what you should do? Just go take a walk, all right? I know your size and I’m... I’m gonna pick up some really good stuff for you.
Molly: No I'm here to take Emma to your mother's, remember?
Monica: That really means a lot. Oh, and Mom, dont bite your nails.
Ross: (sees the chick) Ohhh, hey! All right, listen, I-I have that TV thing in like two hours, and I need your help, okay? What do you think? (takes out two suits) This blue suit, or this brown one?
Phoebe: Oh, come on! Yes, remember that time on the frozen lake? We were playing chess, you said I was boring, and then you took off your energy mask and you were Cameron Diaz! (Realizes) Okay, there's a chance this may have been a dream.
MRS GREEN: The only man I've ever been with is your father.
Dana: Absolutely! But you-you would really feel better about me rejecting you if your actor friend can audition for my movie?
Monica: (sneezes) Oh gosh, Phoebe, I think I caught your cold.
JOEY: No, I don't. It's like, ya know, you work your whole life for somethin' and you think that when you get it it's never gonna be as good as you thought it would be. But this so was. Ya know, it changed everything. Like the other day, I got this credit card application, and I was pre- approved. Huh? I've never been pre-approved for anything in my life.
Phoebe: How can you let him talk to your crotch like that?
Ross: Yknow what? I think I can take care of myself, Ill talk to you later. Good-bye. (Hangs up the phone and turns to find Jill sitting really close to him.) Whoa! Uh, that was your sister actually. She-she thinks that youre just using me.
Monica: Wow! And you got a petticure. Your feet are all dressed up.
Joey: Oh hey, don't worry. I'm still ordained from your wedding.
Joey: Oh, I know how we can decide. Phoebe, show him your game!
Chandler: I totally understand. (They both laugh.) Can I just see your bra?
JOEY: They're ribbed for your pleasure. [Ross and Monica trade their gifts.]
Phoebe: You have chalk on your face.
Singer: (singing) Cause every time I see your face, I cant help but fall from grace. I know.....