words in movies
CHANDLER: Well don't you see how gross that is? I mean that's like you using my toothbrush. [Joey gets a sheepish look] You used my toothbrush?
JOEY: Well, that was only 'cause I used the red one to unclog the drain.
JOEY: Alright, well next time you take a shower, think about the last thing I wash and the first thing you wash.
MONICA: I can't believe you guys are actually getting tattoos.
RACHEL: Yes, but you can not tell Ross 'cause I want to surprise him.
PHOEBE: I think on my shoulder. [Ross enters]
ROSS: No, sorry I don't. Tell me why would anyone pay someone to scar their body for life? What if it doesn't come out right Phoebe? Then it's like, I don't know, havin' a bad hair cut all the time. Why's everyone staring at me?
MONICA: Yeah. It's my dad's birthday, I decided to give him a stroke.
PHOEBE: No, I think you should tell them.
MONICA: No, I don't even know how serious he is about me. Until I do, I'm not telling them anything.
ROSS: I don't know, I don't think mom and dad would mind. Remember when you were 9 and Richard was 30, how dad used to say, 'God I hope they get together.'
ROSS: Uh, actually mom, I think Monica thanked him for the both of us.
FRIEND: Oh. Speaking of whom, I hear he's got some 20-year-old twinkie in the city. [Monica sprays whipped cream all over the place]
CHANDLER: I know, this is a great apartment.
JOEY: Ah, I was just in the bathroom, and there's mirrors on both sides of you. So when you're in there it's like you're peein' with the Rockettes.
CHANDLER: [being left behind] Oh that's all right fellas, I saw a kitchen this morning - on TV. Stop talking. OK.
RICHARD: I am not telling you guys anything.
MR. GELLER: Look, I know what you're going through. When I turned 50 I got the Porsche. You... you got your own little speedster.
MR. GELLER: Tell you what, maybe one of these weekends you can borrow the car and I cou. . .
ROSS: Dad, I beg you not to finish that sentence.
RACHEL: Well I. . .
PHOEBE: I like this lily. It's more open, ya know, and that's like my mom. She had a more open, giving spirit. Ooh, Foghorn Leghorn, ooh.
PHOEBE: I don't believe this. Is this how this relationship's gonna work? Ross equals boss. I mean, c'mon what is this, 1922?
RACHEL: Yes I do, it's just that Ross is. . .
RICHARD: Yeah, I know. I hate it too. Look, maybe we should just tell them.
MONICA: God, you are so lucky. I mean, I mean. . . you know what I mean.
RICHARD: I know, I know. Just hang in there, OK. OK, I'll go out first, alright.
MRS. GELLER: Thank you Richard, I appreciate the support.
MR. GELLER: Honey. Honey, have you seen my Harmon Kilerbrew bat? Bob doesn't believe I have one.
MRS. GELLER: I have no idea. Did you know Richard has a twinkie in the city?
MR. GELLER: I know. He's like a new man. It's like a scene from Cocoon.
MRS. GELLER: I just never would have pictured Richard with a bimbo.
MR. GELLER: I tell you, I've never seen him this happy.
JOEY: Can we drop this? I am not interested in the guy's apartment.
CHANDLER: Oh please, I saw the way you were checking out his mouldings. You want it.
JOEY: Why would I want another apartment, huh? I've already got an apartment that I love.
JOEY: I'm sorry. I'm 28 years old, I've never lived alone, and I'm finally at a place where I've got enough money that I don't need a roommate anymore.
CHANDLER: Woah, woah, woah. I don't need a roommate either, OK? I can afford to live here by myself. Ya know, I may have to bring in somebody once a week to lick the silverware.
JOEY: Well that's how I feel.
JOEY: Well then maybe I will.
MR. GELLER: Who's drink can I freshen?
MONICA: You remember that video I found of mom and dad?
MONICA: Well, I just caught the live show.
MONICA: Nothing, I just heard something nice about you.
RICHARD: Uhh, not that I know of.
MRS. GELLER: Well, I was thinking, why doesn't he give Monica a call?
MRS. GELLER: Well that's wonderful. . . I
MONICA: Yes, a relationship. For your information I am crazy about this man.
MR. GELLER: Am I supposed to stand here and listen to this on my birthday?
MR. GELLER: When did I say that?
PHOEBE: Oh that looks so good, oh I love it.
RACHEL: I know, so do I. Oh Phoebe, I'm so glad you made me do this. OK, lemme se yours.
PHOEBE: Oh OK. [pulls over her shirt and shows a bare shoulder] Oh no, oh it's gone, that's so weird, I don't know how-where it went.
PHOEBE: I know, I know, and I was gonna get it but then he came in with this needle and uh, di-, did you know they do this with needles?
JOEY: I know. Yeah.
CHANDLER: So I got ya something. [tosses Joey a bag of plastic spoons]
JOEY: These'll go great in my new place. You know, 'till I get real ones.
JOEY: Well, I can't use these forever. I mean, let's face it, they're no friend to the environment.
CHANDLER: No-no, I mean what, what's this about your new place?
CHANDLER: Well I didn't think that was serious. [grabs the spoons back] Ya know I thought that was just a fight.
JOEY: Well, it was a fight. . . based on serious stuff, remember. About how I never lived alone or anything. I just think it would be good for me, ya know, help me to grow or. . . whatever.
JOEY: Hey, are you cool with this. I mean, I don't want to leave you high and dry.
CHANDLER: I did pay for half of it.
JOEY: Yeah. And uh, I paid for the other half.
JOEY: Alright, you're on. I can take two minutes out of my day to kick your ass.
MONICA: So, are you sorry that I told them?
RICHARD: No, it's been a long time since your dad and I went running.
RACHEL: That is not a tattoo, that is a nothing. I finally got her back in the chair, bairly touched her with a needle, she jumped up screaming, and that was it.
PHOEBE: OK, hi. For your information this is exactly what I wanted. This is a tattoo of the earth as seen from a great distance. It's the way my mother sees me from heaven.
ROSS: Well it's really. . . sexy. I wouldn't have thought it would be but. . . wow.
RACHEL: I guess.
PHOEBE: I know you're just moving uptown but I'm really gonna miss you.
MONICA: I know, how can you not be accross the hall anymore.
CHANDLER: [quietly] Yeah, I remember.
JOEY: So, I guess this is it.
CHANDLER: Yeah, right, yeah, I guess so.
JOEY: Listen, uh, I don't know when I'm gonna see you again. CHANDLER: Well, I'm guessing uh, tonight at the coffee house. JOEY: Right, yeah. OK. Um, take care. CHANDLER: Yeah. [Joey walks out and after a few seconds comes back in and gives Chandler a big hug. He then leaves for good and Chandler is left alone in his apartment.] CLOSING CREDITS
Phoebe: Of course I do! And Im gonna give it back to you as soon as theyre done with it at the key shining place.
Rachel: Okay. Great! So now that you guys all know you can help me. Give me some advice on how Im gonna tell Ross!
Phoebe: Yknow what? Im not talking to you! You go back to sleep! (To the hitchhiker) And you, are you a rapist?!
Monica: I-I dont-I dont think that Im gonna wear the boots tonight.
Will: Yeah, its not. But Im rich and thin.
Dina: Im pregnant.
Phoebe: Oh, hi Chandler. It's Phoebe. Uhm... I know that Monica is working today so...(back to Central Perk) ...I was wondering if you want to come to the movies with me and Rachel.
Dina: I-I cant go in there. I cant tell him!
Dina: Joe, I tried to wait until I was 25 like you did!
Monica: (on phone, faking she's sick) I-I'm not gonna be able to make it into work today, I don't feel very good. (Joey makes a high throw and Monica has to catch it way over her head.) (Not sounding sick) Yes!! (Realizes what she just did.) (Sounding sick again) Wow! Uh, for a second there I thought I was really better, but I'm not. (Hangs up and keeps throwing the ball.)
Rachel: I know.
Gunther: And when you have a second later, I wanna show you why we dont just trap spiders under coffee mugs and leave them there.
Rachel: Oh really? Well how would you like it if I had sex with you and I taped it? (Joey smiles luridly) Oh forget it! (Ross enters.) Oh there he is now, the father of my child, the porn king of the west village.
Phoebe: Uh-huh, Im with Ben.
Phoebe: Yes! Yes you can, Im looking for Jacks parents.
Joey: Uh, okay Ill-Ill-Ill break it down. (He hands the phone to Phoebe, gets up, picks up a chair, and starts banging it on the floor.)
The Teacher: Excuse me. Can, can I help you with something?
Chandler: All right. Look, Im gonna go in here, and you dont buy me anything ever. (starts to go into the store)
Phoebe: I brought a bunch of stuff for the house, so check it out. Ha-ha. (She removes this large ceramic dog that comes up to the second floor and places it next to the house.)
The Teacher: Ive only met your partner Carol.
Chandler: Yeah, oh, but I just keep picturing you rolling around with him with your cowboy boots in the air...
Richard: Of course! Im-Im sorry. I-Id hate you to miss anything like that on account of me. I can do this!
Joey: Rach, I gotta say...if you weren't here wondering if these guys were gay I don't know if I could do this!
Chandler: Oh, yeah. (Starts to take it off and then realizes) Uh, no you cant have my jacket! Because then I would be cold! If you thought that you were going to be cold, you shouldve brought your own jacket. But uh, other than that, are you okay? Are you okay?
Monica: Okay you were right! All right, I never should have bought them! Theyre killing me! One toe at a time!
Rachel: (answering the phone) Hello? (listens) Yeah, this is she. (listens) Oh! Youre kidding! Youre kidding! (listens) Oh thank you! I love you!
Dina: Yes I do!
Joey: Dont interrupt me when Im talkin to God! Now where were we? Oh right, okay. Do you Dina, take this man
Rachel: You are right there with Emily. And its yknow, its kinda like . its a tie! Well, I gotta get, I gotta get back to the dishes.
Joey: Well what am I supposed to do?
Dina: No I wont!
Ross: Waitohheyhuh, oh great now he knows, and I don't know!
Trudie Styler: Im Trudie.
Phoebe: Why else would I be here?
CHANDLER: No, see, I'm trying this new screening thing. You know, I figure if I'm always answering the phone, people'll think I don't have a life. My god, Rodrigo never gets pinned.
Trudie Styler: Oh no, I know that wouldnt work. My husbands in concert.
Airline Employee: Im sorry, would you move your thumb? I cant see the seat number.
Trudie Styler: Oh Im sorry, Jacks father is not available.
Trudie Styler: Im not giving concert tickets to someone whod use their son like this!
CHANDLER: Wow, it sounds even cooler when somebody else says it. I was awesome, ok? She was biting her lip to stop from screaming.
Phoebe: Oh, I almost dont want to show this. (Hands it to him.) Just remember Im a minute younger.
Monica: Okay, Im sorry. I think I can walk the rest of the way now. Just-just give me my boots.
Chandler: No! No! I support you 100%! I just didn't, I didn't get it right away. Y'know now I'm caught up! Identical hand twins! It's a million-dollar idea!
Monica: Well I dont have them either. Where are they?
Chandler: I can see it from right here. Itll cost you one husband.
Rachel: Oh, I forgot this was in here. Umm, this was the uh garter that I was saving for my wedding and I wanted it to be Monicas something borrowed and its blue. (Starts to cry again.) Yeah
Joey: No. (Phoebe grabs the receipt and shows it to Joey who gets mad.) I was told the name of the movie would not appear on the bill!
Rachel: I know, I lied! I didnt want her to think I was a terrible mother! I cant even see my own baby!
Dina: No Joey! I knew you wouldnt be supportive!
Rachel: Oh excuse me! Am I ruining my life?
Joey: One pregnant woman at a time, please! I just want you to be okay.
Monica: Yes! Now, theyre a little more than I normally spend on boots or rent (Shows him the receipt.)
Joey: Well Id be scared of them, but all right.
Phoebe: Oh my God! I do love you! How did you do it?!
Phoebe: Then thats not breaking the law! Im there!
Ross: Youre gonna love me so much. I got Sting tickets!! (Holds up two.)
Rachel: Jill, honey, I think this is the best thing that couldve ever happened to you. I mean you needed to get out on your own anyway! And you know when I did it, I-I-I at first I was scared, and look at me now! Im the only daughter dad is proud of! Okay, well this is, this is what youre gonna do. Youre gonna get a job, youre gonna get an apartment, and then Ill help you and you can stay with us. Right Pheebs, she can stay with us?
Joey: Umm, can you do me a favor? I was talkin to my sister and she knows you work at Ralph Lauren
Phoebe: Yeah, I really do! Yes, but, after I dumped on the way he was gonna propose to me, I don’t think he’s ever gonna ask again! I mean, I said no in Barbados and now this!
Rachel: Wow! This explains so much! Last weekend, I went from store to store sitting on Santas lap.
Monica: We left Joey alone with the food! (Walks towards the window and looks out) Yep! Yep, I knew it! There he is... feeding stuffing to a dog!
Chandler: Well, Im upsetfor you. I mean, having sex with an endless line of beautiful women must be very unfulfilling for you. (He cant believe he just sad that.)
Ross: I don't know, I'm one sorry polentologist. (Stops reading.) All right Joey, we get it. (To Chandler) I'm sorry.
Ross: I know. Can you believe that?
Ross: I can show you, I have it on videotape! (Stunned silence) Its an expression.
Phoebe: Well maybe he was just nervous, yknow you can be very intimidating. And besides Ive met your pastry chef and she can stand to be taken down a peg or two.
Phoebe: Wait, Im-Im sorry. Whats the big deal about a holiday card?
Mona: Oh, I gotta get to work. So call me later?
Monica: Oh my pleasure. Okay, Im afraid Ive got some bad news. (Phoebe enters.) Phoebe!
Monica: I cant think of anything were doing. (Quietly) Why cant I think of anything were doing?
Chandler: I didnt know you and Carol were getting divorced, Im sorry.
Joey: (lying on a beach towel, recapping what happened in the last episode) Okay, so we went to the beach, because Phoebe found out about this lady who knew her mom and dad, and I dont really know what happened with that.
Joey: All right! There is something. I kinda had a dream, (pause) but I don't want to talk about it. (Starts for his room.)
Mr. Geller: Chandler, Im gonna have you arrested.
Ross: A hundred?! Well, I-I guess Ill take aMona, uh I-Im not sure about the whole uh, card thing.
Ross: Oh, I uh, hope you don't mind, I kinda uh, jazzed it up a little. Check this out. (He plays the greeting, and We Will Rock You starts to play and Ross's voice comes over it.) We will, we will, call you back!
Ross: Sending out a holiday card, together, I mean I just dont know if were really quite there yet.
Ross: Come on, who are we kidding? Im doody. Please? Shes watchin.
Ross: The card! I think were there!
Mona: I mean I love spending time with you, yknow I justI hope were moving forward. I mean, we should probably talk about that. Dont you think?
Ross: Really?! I mean, even with the card?
Ross: Wha, heh, how could you know, I don't even know!
Mona: Okay. IBut I think we should still have this conversation.
Rachel: Oh yes, absolutely! Yknow, its weird uh, but I had a dream last night where I was stopped by a policeman. And then he uh well I probably shouldnt tell you the rest.
Phoebe: Yeah, you've... you know, sort of been like a dad to me. I mean, you've always, you know, looked out for me and shared your wisdom...
Rachel: No. Im very comfortable.
Dr. Schiff: (entering) Hi Rachel? Im Dr. Schiff. (By the way, hes an attractive man.)
Dr. Schiff: Im a doctor.
Dr. Schiff: Uh, I dont have a wife or girlfriend, but I do like to ski.
Chandler: Im sorry. When you were in high school you made out with a 50-year-old woman?
Joey: Wow! (Tearing up) Well, uh Hey! Im really happy for you guys! Congratulations! (Kisses Monica on the cheek) See you later. (Starts for the door on the verge of tears as Monica stops him.)
Chandler: Oh! Right. Umm, maybe thats because I didnt send him an invitation.
Phoebe: I love you too...
Monica: Hey, I couldve had you if I wanted you.
Joey: HEY! I never have an off night ok although sometimes when I'm a little bloated I don't feel very sexy BUT EVEN THEN I'M BETTER THEN MOST!
Monica: All right. Have you said, "I love you?" You could say, I love you.
Ross: So do we!! So do we!! (Ross notices a couple has been staring at them.) Im sorry you had to see that.
Rachel: Okay, umm, Im gonna get my sweater. (Walks away.)
CHANDLER: Uh, two larges, extra cheese on both. But listen, don't ring the buzzer for 19, ring 20, Geller-Green, they'll let you in, OK. If you buzz our door, there's no tip for you. OK, thanks. Pizza's on the way. I told you we wouldn't have to get up.
Phoebe: Oh, I can't believe you! You've been so good, for three years!