words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is there to watch Joey's first scene as Dr. Drake Remoray.]
Monica: What?
[The next flashback is also from The One With The Butt and it's also on the soundtrack. He's Joey telling everyone about his big break in Monica and Rachel's apartment.]
Joey: I play Al Pacino's butt. All right? He goes into the shower, and then- I'm his butt. Monica: (trying not to laugh) Oh my God. Joey: C'mon, you guys. This is a real movie, and Al Pacino's in it, and that's big! Chandler: Oh no, it's terrific, it's- it's- y'know, you deserve this, after all your years of struggling, you've finally been able to crack your way into show business. Joey: Okay, okay, fine! Make jokes, I don't care! This is a big break for me! Ross: You're right, you're right, it is.
Monica: Yes.
[The next flashback is from The One With The Prom Video. Monica is at a job interview at a new restaurant.]
Monica: Alright, well I'm tearing the lettuce.
Monica: Oh-oh, no no don't worry, I'm gonna wash it.
Monica: That's your call.
Monica: Well, I thought that I would cut up the tomatos.
Monica: They'r alright.
Monica: No really, they're OK.
Monica: Actually, I was gonna do them jullienne.
Monica: I'm outa here. [Monica leaves]
Rachel: (on the phone) Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it! (Pause) Im telling you Im quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now! (Pause) Yes I am! (Pause) Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when you get this message. (Hangs up.)
Monica: Well, what happened?
Monica: Was it...
Chandler: Oh come on guys, its not like I moved to Europe! I just moved across the hall! And we would have you over all the time if it werent for (struggles to get this out) Monicas allergies. (The duck quacks.) Youre right, I could never lie to you. She hates you. (The phone rings.) Should I get that? (Laughs, then answers the phone.) Hello? (Listens) Uh no, Joeys not here right now. Can I take a message? (Listens) Yeah, okay so the audition has been moved from 5:00 to 2:30? (Listens) Okay great. (Listens.) Bye. (Hangs up the phone and goes to write the message on the Magna-Doodle on the door but Monica walks in and forces him to jump out of the way.)
Monica: (startled) Ahh! Arent you dressed yet?
Monica: Were supposed to meet my parents in 15 minutes.
Monica: Wh?! What about my allergies?!
Chandler: Oh right, your allergies. (Monica leaves and to the chick and duck) All her, she hates you. (Chandler leaves without finishing the message for Joey.)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica and Rachel are consoling Chandler.]
Monica: Oh, stop beating yourself up! People make mistakes! These things happen! There arent any message youve forgotten to give me are there? (Chandler has a disgusted look on his face.) Apparently youre not very good at it! I
Monica: Yknow what? He will forgive you. And I like to bring a pad with me when I go answer the phone just in case (Chandler gets that disgusted look back.) Okay
Ross: It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front and back!! (they go into the living room, trapping Monica, Chandler, and Joey in the kitchen) (to Rachel) Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are, Y-O-U-R means your!
[The next flashback is from The One After The Superbowl, Part II. Monica and Rachel are fighting over who gets to see Jean-Claude Van Damme.]
Monica: You had no right to go out with him.
Monica: You sold me out.
Monica: Yes you did. You absolutely sold me...
Rachel: Would you let me talk. [flicks Monica on the forehead]
Monica: Did you just flick me?
Rachel: OK, well, you wouldn't let me finish and I was jus- [Monica flicks her back] Ow. That hurt [flicks Monica]
(Rachel tackles Monica onto the couch.)
(They wrestle on the couch for a little while until Monica gets the upper hand and pulls Rachel off of the couch by her sock. Monica removes Rachel's sock and starts beating her with it.)This leads to wrestling on the floor. This finally angers Phoebe.)
(Phoebe grabs each of them by an ear.) Monica and Rachel: Ow! Ow! Ow!
Monica: Fine!
Monica: Well?
Monica: No, I haven't seen him.
Monica: Aww... (They hug)
(Monica and Rachel's door opens and Rachel and Paolo emerge)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that same day. Joey and Chandler are eating pizza, and Phoebe is trying to knit something.]
MONICA: Did they just kill off Joey?
Monica: Nope. Going to the Big Apple Circus today.
Phoebe: Okay. Oh but dont tell them Monicas pregnant because, they frown on that.
Monica: I don't need an actual man, just a couple of his best swimmers. And there, there are places you can go to get that stuff.
Monica: Ah no, you see, someone was supposed to take them down around New Years... but obviously someone forgot.
[Scene: Monicas birthday, Monica is now dressed and is being helped out by Chandler and Rachel.]
Monica: (without looking up from what she's doing) Besides tampons and salt? (Then looks) Ooh! My God! Maple candy! That's so sweet of you. (Opens the box) That's weird...it's empty!
Monica: (chasing after him) Chandler! It happens to lots of guys! You-you-you were probably tired, you had a lot of champagne, dont worry about it!
Phoebe: Damn you Monica Geller hyphen Bing!
Joey: (entering) Hey uh Monica, I cant remember. Did we say we were gonna meet here or at the movies?
Monica: All right. Have you said, "I love you?" You could say, I love you.
MICH: I don't know if Monica told you but this is the first date I've gone on since my divorce so, if I seem a little nervous, I am.
Monica: Listen, uh, you told me something that was really difficult for you. And I, I-I figured if you could be honest, then I can to.
Monica: Because I need the money, and I thought that itd be a great way to get rid of that last little schmidgen of self-respect.
Monica: Can we come in?
(Monica opens the door.)
Monica: Hi.
Monica: Ross, can I?
Monica: Oh, friends first, drunk in London, you know the story. I've got a better question for you: Do you or any of your blood relatives have diabetes?
(Monica holds Ben.)
Monica: He is so amazing.
[Scene: Mr. Geller's birthday party. Mr. and Mrs. Geller enter looking particularly refreshed. Monica follows looking rather pale.]
Monica: Awww, look at Aunt Monica's little boy!
Monica: (slams down cards) I hate this game!
Monica: Okay, I think I get how to do this.
Monica: OK, we got the cole slaw, we got the buns...
Monica: Hi! Hey, Pete youre back! Hey, check this out. (She starts to skate over to him)
JOEY: Oh, hey, Monica, we've got a question.
Monica and Phoebe: Ewww!
Monica: Hey.
Monica: You have to help me! Im supposed to be writing my vows and all I have is this! (Shows them what shes been working on.)
Monica: No!! Why didnt you make a copy and-and keep it in a fireproof box and keep it at least a hundred yards from the original?!!
Monica: You're going to China?
Monica: Joey... we always know what you mean.
Monica: Yeah.
Monica: How was that possible?
Monica: And Mindy, your maid of...?
Monica: Okay, so you were trying to play bad this whole time.
MONICA: I'm just easing you in.
Monica: So, uh, have you ever thought about being there for her?
(Monica rolls her eyes.)
Monica: Think about it.
Monica: (goes to Chandler) Phoebe and Rachel saw you with Nancy today and... em... they think you're having an affair.
Monica: Gosh, doesn't it seem like a million years ago?
Monica: Y'know, just be there for her.
Monica: I can't believe he did this.
Monica: I have no moves. (He moves in to kiss her and she laughs and backs away.) Okay, whatcha doin there?! (Giggles.) Oh yknow what? Im sorry, this is just too weird.
Monica: Are you freaking kidding me, Green?
Monica: Ethan, it's um... it's icky.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, continued from earlier.]
Monica: Hey-hey, how goes the dancing? Gay yet?
Monica: Rachel, what're you gonna say to him?
Monica: I just thought he was nice, y'know?
Monica: From here to the airport?
Monica: Okay then, I dont stink. Im a good chef. Okay. (Starts to leave.)
Ross: So, Phoebs owes $7.50, Monica, you owe $10, and Rachel, you owe fifteen big ones.
Monica: Its only been a couple of hours, so just give it some time.
Monica and Phoebe: Sure.
Monica: Then why the hell are you dumping my brother?!?
Monica: Wait a minute! Unless, we give her all gifts she can use after shes done being pregnant. Like-like umm, regular coffee, Tequila.
Monica: Is there? Is there someone else?
Monica: Why isn't it working out?
Monica: Mail call, Rachel Green, bunk seven.
Monica: Oh, from who?
MONICA: Ok. [Richard walks in] Hey, why don't you ask Richard?
Monica: Aww, the only reason you want to go out with me because my blond wig, and the big boobs, and the fact that I serve you food.
Monica: Oh, why?
Monica: (gets up) No, no, no, no, no, no pressure, no pressure!
Monica: No, you can't! Friends hooking up is a bad idea.
Monica: Okay. (They both jump up to head for there room, but Monica stops.) But wait, we cant. My Cousin Cassie is in the guest room, were supposed to have lunch.
Monica: No, its not bad. Its not bad at all. Its-its really nice.
Rachel: Monica, would you calm down? The credit card people said that you only have to pay for the stuff that you bought.
Monica: Oh, hes catching up to her!
Monica: I'm sure they'll be here soon.
Rachel: Oh uh-uh pal! Dont call me mommy! Its bad enough you call your own mother that. (He looks at Monica.)
MONICA: There's a game?
MONICA: Oh God, you are about to get sooo lucky.
Phoebe: (on phone) 'Right, well look, um, if Joey loses this audition, that is it for Estelle. I don't care! Annie you are a doll, what time can you see him?' (to Monica) I need a pen. (Chandler hands her one, but she needs something to right on, so she tilts Chandler's head over and writes on the back of his neck)
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is serving Joey, Ross, and Monica their drinks.]
Monica: Ohh come on, I love this song! Come on, youll be fine. (She starts to walk towards the floor.)
Monica: (pulling the plate back) Oh-ho! But not in here! Cant eat em in bed, remember? No crumbies!
Phoebe: Sure! (When Monica gets close to the door.) (Yelling) Yeah! Las Vegas, number one!
Monica: (to Julie) It's an expression.
Monica: Pheebes, you know what I'm thinking?
Monica: No you're not.
Monica: Why not?
Monica: No, although now that's what I'm thinking.
Monica: Sweetie, I wanted you to have him too.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning.]
Monica: So? How did it go with Joshua last night?
Monica: Yeah. But of course we had to update it a little bit. (To Ross) Hey, by the way, great thinking about catching me!
Monica: Honey, you're not pathetic, you're sad.
Monica: Rachel, how did this happen?
[Monica and Phoebe enter.]
[Cut to Chandler entering his and Monicas apartment alight with a thousand candles in The One With The Proposal.]