words in movies
Ross: Id bet Id still be doing my kara-tay. (Thats karate, hes just saying it that way.) Towards the end of our marriage I was doing a lot of kara-tay as a way of releasing the tension from yknow, not doing anything else physical.
{Transcribers note: This is where the opening credits are, but theyre not the usual opening credits. Oh no! These credits are based on the world that would have been created had all of the above actually happened. It starts out with all of them at the fountain sitting on the couch as Fat Monica runs up and sits on the arm of the couch, tilting the whole thing towards her. It then goes on to show Rachels still a shop-aholic and with Barry. Fat Monica is sweating while cooking and dancing while eating a donut. Phoebe as the Wall Street shark smoking while on two cell phones. Then theyre dancing in the fountain. Joey entering as Dr. Drake Remoray and meeting a groupie. Chandler trying to write as a bird does its business on his shoulder and falling asleep while typing. Ross doing some kara-tay and trying to get Carol into bed. And finally, some more dancing in the fountain, them all flexing, and the turning out the lamp and shutting off all the lights bit from the first season. Just remember one thing, this is an alternate universe. Everything from every other episode doesnt apply, for instance, Ross and Rachel have no history. And in fact have not seen each other in years in this world.}
Monica: Hes not boring! Hes just-hes just low key.
Monica's Boyfriend: Yeah. Yknow, the hazelnut actually not a nut, its a seed.
Joey: (not impressed) Wow!!
Chandler: Oh I just got another rejection letter. They said my writing was funny, just not "Archie Comic funny."
Rachel: Ohh, so do you! Did you lose weight? (Shes not quite sure of that one.)
Chandler: Well its kinda hard to be friends with Drake because of his busy schedule and the fact that hes not real.
Rachel: (still not quite able to look at him) Hi! I love you on that show! I watch you everyday! I mean, when you took out your own kidney to save your ex-wife even though she tired to kill you
Joey: (turning and whispering to Monica) Shes not crazy is she?
Ross: Come on Pheebs, its not that bad! Yknow most people would be excited if they didnt have to work for a couple of weeks.
Phoebe: Most people dont like their jobs, I love my job! I have not been working for three hours and Im already going crazy. I miss Joan.
Chandler: I always thought having a heart attack was natures way of telling you to die! (Phoebe glares at him.) But youre not gonna die. I mean, you are going to die, but youre not gonna die today. I wish I was dead.
Phoebe: Oh thats not so bad.
Rachel: (awestruck, then not) Isnt that a line from the show?!
Joey: (To Rachel) Did I not just tell him?
Chandler: Its not all juice! (Rachel quickly gets out of the way.)
Ross: Carol our sex life isits just not working
Monica: Its not mayonnaise!!
Rachel: Yeah. Oh I just wish we could not be married for a little bit! Yknow I just wish we could be like on a break!
Monica: Well, youre not.
Rachel: Oh, its so easy for you I mean, youre not married, you get to have sex with who ever you want!
Monica: Its not like, I havent any opportunities. I mean, yknow, Im just waiting for the perfect guy. Im seeing this guy Roger, all right? Hes not perfect, but umm, I think maybe I should just get it over with. Yknow, give him my flower.
Rachel: Yes!! I mean sex does not have to be a big deal! There shouldnt be all this rules and restrictions! Yknow, people should be able to sleep with who ever they want, whenever
Phoebe: No! Its not a cigarette! The smoke is coming out of me!
Dr. Drake Remoray: Not so fast Wesley! (Rachel does a silent clap.)
Dr. Drake Remoray: Thats right Wesley! I just stopped by to say that, youre not a real doctor! And that womans brain, is fine!
Dr. Drake Remoray: Youre not dying Hope, youre gonna live a long, healthy life. With me.
Chandler: Listen Phoebe, hes right. People are not supposed to have heart attacks at 31.
Susan: (not taking her eyes off Carol) Hello Ross. (Takes off her coat and hands it to him.) I love what youve done with this space.
Monica: Stop it!! Thats not funny!!
Chandler: With Roger? (Monica shyly looks away.) Not just with Roger?! (Monica shrugs.) Oh my God!
Monica: No. Hes not a horrible guy.
Chandler: No you are not! You are sweet and wonderful and this is gonna happen for you.
Joey: No! No! No, not after seeing that.
Joey: Thats ridiculous! Im not a "Star," just a regular famous actor.
Joey: Look, do you want the ring or not?!
Joey: Whoa-whoa-whoa! Youre not gonna use the pay phone to call work, are ya?
Joey: (not quite sure of how to answer that) Well uh, look Ross I uh, I think Carols great and Im sure youre a very attractive man, but I .
Joey: Not the other one?
Rachel: Well, if you see him, will you please tell him that Im looking for him and that this I am not gonna throw up!
Rachel: Me? Im great! Im fine! Im sooo good!! But, you know whos not great?! Men! Youre a man right Ross?!
Ross: Look I-I dont know whats going on with you and your husband and what is hopefully an adult dog walker, look can I just say not all men are like that.
Ross: She is not (Realizes) Shes gay. Oh my God. She is so gay! I cant believe this.
Chandler: Yeah! When you were talking about Roger, that was killing me! Look, things like last night they dont just happen. Yknow? Or at least not to me. Or with the other two women, in the morning yknow I was just lying there and I couldnt wait to just go hang out with my friends, but with you I always yknow with a friend.
Chandler: I know you probably dont want to go out with me, yknow because I make too many jokes and Ive never been in a serious relationship and I guess Im not technically a "doctor "
Rachel: I did not know you spoke French.
Phoebe: Uh. It's not... quite what I'm saying.
Joey: How could I not get the part? The play was about a 29-year-old Italian actor from Queens.
Ross: I'm not scared of him, I'm really sick!
Monica: (sees what he is doing) Chandler, stop! It is not going to pop open!
Ross: Absolutely. (Very Squeaky.) I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, (deep voice) I'm fine. I'm not saying I wasn't a little surprised to see you guys kissing. I mean, at first I was like.. (Screams.) But now that I've had time to absorb it; Lovin' this.
Chandler: We are NOT signing those papers.
Monica: Oh, I'm glad. Listen, I want to apologize about Chandler, though. I just did not see this coming.
Monica: (smiling) No it's not.
Ross: Not even once.
Rachel: (after a pause) Not even one more time?
Rachel: Not stupid. The very cute, cute, cute doctors asked us out for tomorrow night, and I said "yes."
Joshua: All those things I said about not being ready
Phoebe: No, cause she didnt tell me I was gonna die until the very end of the session, and I was not gonna waste a whole another hour there! I mean Ive only got a week left, yknow? Ive really gotta start living now! (So she picks up the latest copy of Car and Driver (a U.S. auto magazine), leans back, and starts reading.)
Phoebe: Well, not anything, I mean...
PHOEBE: I'm just gonna pass on the concert, 'cause I'm just not in a very Hootie place right now.
Rachel: Oh! It's not good.
Phoebe: Oh, not anymore. I changed it today.
Monica: No it's not!
Phoebe: You're not serious, right?
Phoebe:(not amused) Mike Crap Bag?
Joey: Yeah well, Im guessing after this shes not going to be crazy about electricity either.
Ross: (in his head) Say something clever! (Pause.) Okay, doesnt have to be clever, it just has to be words. Say some words. (Pause) Any words will do. (Pause) Oh my God! This is the longest that anyone has not talked ever! (Pause) There is nothing you can say to make this worse!! So just say something!! (Pause.) (To her) I-I, I uh havent had sex in a very long time. (She leaves.) (In his head) Yeah, you really shouldnt have said anything.
Maitre d': Mr Campbell's not here yet. Let me show you to his table.
Ross: Yeah, were not just doing a card! Yknow, she-she also wants to have the conversation about where the relationship is going.
Rachel: Cmon, seriously, you guys, youre not going to make me watch this alone!
Monica: No it's not, b'cause she's still in love with Mike!
Phoebe: Well, not for a little while. Let's just give him a few days to get used to everything else.
Mr Zelner: But I'm sorry. There's nothing I can do... Ah, it's not true, there is... nothing I want to do.
Ross: So, you’re not going to Paris.
Phoebe: Ok, this is not about the MONEY, ok? It's about... it's about corporate greed destroying our hearts and leaving us... the hollow shells.
Chandler: This can not be happening!
Chandler: Good, good. Listen, heh, I dunno what Shelley told you about me, but, uh... I'm not.
Mr Zelner: (obviously amused) Not good, Ron.
Rachel: Oh, wait Joey! We fought the Nazis in World War II, not World War I.
Rachel: I just purchased the La-Z-Boy E-cliner 3000. (Which is an actual product by the way, Im not sure about the 3000 part.)
Joey: All right, all right, all right, let's play one more time, ok? And remember, if I win you do not move to Paris.
Ross: That was in high school! Its not like it was binding forever.
Chandler: Well, it's not.
Rachel: Im not asking you to go on a date with him!
Chandler: Ooh, not so tight... (blows raspberry, and the hug ends) I'm sorry, just give me one more chance.
Monica: I can't believe you're not gonna be here for Christmas.
Phoebe: Oh, I'm still mad at them but I also now that they bring happiness to lots of kids who's moms didn't kill themselves, so by supporting them, I'm doing a good thing, but I'm not happy about it. So there, a selfless good deed.
Monica: This is not, what I�m wearing. I�m ovulating and Chandler�s gonna be home any minute, so I thought we would try before dinner.
Monica: You invite my brother, you invite my whole family, and not me?! Why?! WhatWhy wouldnt you want me at your wedding? What could I have possibly done?! (Frannies husband walks up.) Stuart!
ROSS: Ross, uh and uh, I'd just like to say that it did take a lot of courage for Rachel to come here tonight. And, uh, for the record she did not run out on Barry because she had syphilis. (da-doom-chesh) (to drummer) What are you doing I'm serious. Uh, the reason she walked out on, on Barry is simply that she didn't love him, which incidentally worked out pretty well for me (looks for the da-doom-chesh, and doesn't get one) Cheers.
Chandler: Im watching the game, but Im not deaf!
Rachel: Its not a miracle Joey! Im sure theres some explanation.
Rachel: Oh you're not. You're not gonna get in the middle of anything, don't worry about Ross really, really.(She hears the noise of the key in the lock) Oh! Hide! That's Ross! Hide! Hide!
Monica: Sorry! I'm justI'm not very good at this! I'm a terrible liar and I hate having to lie to Rachel!
Phoebe: I did not see that coming.
Rachel: No well, no it's not that bad, y'know? I mean yeah, my tongue feels a little fuzzy and these fingers sort of smell, I actually feel like I can throw up.
Ross: Wow, I hadn't thought of that. I hope not.
Chandler: I mean, I know that's not possible, but he does.
Phoebe: Tips not included.
Chandler: Monica, we are not ready to have two babies!
Joey: Oh, you're not taking her with you tonight?
Phoebe: Ross, Rachel doesn't know that you wanna get back together. If she did, she might feel differently. She might not even go.
Joey: I know, I know..., but that's okay. I mean, we can control ourselves, we're not animals.
Ross: I'm not getting you a muffin!
Ross: No, and I'm not going to.
Joey: Why not?
Monica: No, not if their room has two beds!
Monica: Why not! This is her wedding day, this is way more important than some stupid kids!
Joey: It did not.
Monica: With good news? (very quickly and wringing hands) Of course it is not good news, you just said (deadpan) "Doctor Connelly just called". If it was good news you would have said (excitedly) "Doctor Connelly just called! " But so what is it? Is there a problem, uh? Is there a problem with me or with you?
Phoebe: Not with that attitude! Now, haul ass!
Ross: Yes, that's what I have. It's not on the board.
Rachel: Well, come on, Steve; let's not rule out nervous laughter. Hey, now wait a minute. Phoebe told me that - that you owned your own restaurant. That's impressive.
Ross: I am not doing this over the phone.
Joey: Hey, is this person who decides whether or not you... get a baby?
Passenger #2: I'm not flying on it!
PHOEBE: I'm sorry Monica but I knew if I told you, you'd get really, like, judgemental and you would not approve.
Ross: And it's a wedding! It'd be weird if I'm not in it...
Chandler: He's not right for the part. So if I suggest him, my bosses are gonna think I'm an idiot! And that's something they should learn on their own!
Ross: Actually, Billy Tratt is gay now. So-so that ones not really our fault.
Frank Sr.: I just, I y'know, I'm not very good at this. So, umm (Backs away.)
Monica: He just told me at the counter. He made me promise not to tell, but I couldn't hold it in any longer!
Ross: (to Rachel) Haha! Looks like you're not going to be in the wedding either. (Looks at Phoebe) So sorry Pheebs.
ROSS: Not at the concert.
Monica: Yeah! You already got the first class tickets; you got the lounge! I mean we should get free stuff too! I mean youre not the only ones on your honeymoon!
Monica: No-no, its not okay! Its not! I mean you were just Youre so incredible! You went through all this time and effort to make this tape for me! Yknow Im just gonnaI, I am gonna make this up to you! I will! I-I am going to cook anything you want in here (points to the kitchen), and I am going to do anything you want in there! (Points to the bedroom.)
Joey: Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa, I-IHey! I did not go out with your wife! (The same woman from before enters.) Okay? I went out with her! (Points at her.)
Rachel: (not excited anymore) You pierced her ears!?
Megan: Oh Im not, I just like to try these on.
Monica: Honey, you can relax. Last night at work, Geoffrey told this really sexist joke. After that, not so funny anymore.
Rachel: Monica! Im not gonna screw it up!
Phoebe: So youre not homesick yet?
Chandler: Yeah, not bad right? You know what, Monicas gonna be working late, so I'm gonna make this place spotless. You know what else I'm gonna do, know what else I'm gonna do? I'm gonna go downstairs, I'm gonna get her some flowers. Now who wouldn't wanna live with me?
Chandler: Fine, but if we end up not doing this Maxim thing because of this party...
Rachel: No! Come on its late, were not gonna go down to the office.
Rachel: And if you need anything else, I(notices the handsome Dr. Franzblau)do not believe we've met. Hi. I'm, uh, Rachel Green. I'm Carol's... ex-husband's... sister's roommate.
Rachel: God, I hope he doesn't show up. Of course he's not gonna show up, the guy hates me.
Ross: Not since my cop-show got cancelled.
Ross: Not just a key, I gave her the only key! I am now a homeless person in a very serious relationship.
Ronni: Oh no, not you, big Joey. Oh my God, you're so much cuter than your pictures! (Joey stares at her) I-I'm, I'm Ronni....Cheese Nip?
Rachel: Ill tell ya who should be embarrassed! Its you guys! Come on! This is ridiculous! Thank you very much, but I do not need you to get me a date!
Ross: Y'know what, y'know what, Im-Im not the one that wanted that, that break, okay. Youre the one that bailed on us. Youre the one that, that ran when things got just a little rough!
PHOE: No, you are not, you are very attractive. You know what, I go through the exact same thing. Every time I put on a little weight, I start questioning everyting.
Rachel: Okay. Thank you! Thank you! BecauseI'm sorry, all right. Because y'know what? She didn't want menot important. The point is, I was right. Your decision. Okay? I was right. (She starts for the door.) (Stops) Your decision.