words in movies
Ross: It's a blanket Joe, not a cloak of invisibility!
David: Still you know, a girl calls you by your ex-boyfriend's name, that-that's not a good thing, right?
Chandler: David, let me stop you there 'cause I think I see where this is going. I'm not very good at giving advice. So if you want advice, go to Ross, Monica, or... Joey, if the thing you wanna advice about is pizza toppings or burning sensation when you pee.
Chandler: Oh, because his penis was too big. (he notices that David is not amused) Oh, I'm sorry, that's the kind of thing I do. (pause) They broke up because Mike didn't want to get married. Hey, what if you just let Phoebe know you'd be open to marriage?
David: Why not? It's brilliant! (talking to an imaginary Mike) Goodbye Mike, we'll see you at the wedding, fella! (pause) well, we probably won't invite you to the wedding... (to Chandler) Thank you, Chandler. Sincerely.
Joey: You could say: "Hey Kenny, how come you're not Britney Spears?" (looks at Ross matter-of-factly)
Monica: Chandler, we have talked about this. You are not supposed to give people advice! Now couldn't you just have made some sort of inappropriate joke?
Phoebe: Not Joey.
Rachel: Not Joey, no, I was just lusting after Chandler.
Monica: See what happens when you give people advice? I hope you told him not to?
Rachel: It's not the time Charlie.
Chandler: It's not gone! I mean, I'm sure you printed out a copy. You have a hard copy, right?
Mike: Look, if Phoebe wants to marry David, she should, I'm not gonna stand in the way of that and neither should you.
Chandler: (pretending not to sense the tone) Oooh! I hope you're happy too, honey!
Monica: No it's not, b'cause she's still in love with Mike!
Chandler: And there's not chance that will work?
Monica: No, I called him. It's not gonna happen.
Rachel: We can't. We're not pharmacists!
Joey: (walking to a table with many badges on it) I know we're not, but (he picks up a badge) Frank Medeio and... (picks up another badge) Eva Trorro... womba...
Joey: Not enough pills in the world, Rach. What about you, you're the single one, seen anybody in there you like?
Rachel: No, I'm not blushing, I'm sunburnt! From, you know, the rain.
Joey: Come on who? Who do you like? Tell me. You're not getting away that easy. Who do you like, who?
Rachel: Joey, come on! It doesn't matter, you know, it's not like anything's gonna happen.
Joey: What? Why not? Rach, who can you not get?
Chandler: (to a paleontologist sitting next to him) Not to mention the cold sores.
Ross: And that's just the herbivores. I'm not even gonna discuss the carnivores, their heads are already too big. Which is ironic considering their stunted cerebral development.
Charlie: (smiling broadly) I was not!
Ross: (joking) I'd better not found you naked in my hotel room!
Phoebe: Well, on the bright side, now you won't have to see all these paleontologists with their shirts off. (Grabs a drink and notices that the two men are upset) Not you guys. You got it going on!
Monica: (disappointed) Why not?
Monica: I'm not always that bad!
Charlie: ... is it weird that it's not with each other?
Chandler: I'm not playing with you.
Joey: No, it's not, we have nothing in common!
Rachel: Ok... uh... maybe you're not always going after the wrong girl...
Joey: (sitting up again) I'm telling you, Rach, Charlie is not right for me!
Rachel: Yeah, I'm not talking about her...
Rachel: (nearly whispering) Ok, let's not make a big thing about this!
Rachel: Not working with me, Joe! Here's the thing: lately I have been having thoughts (pauses) musings, if you will!
Rachel: I don't know, I'm not trying to do anything, it's just, we have such a good time when we're together, you know... I mean, aren't you just a... little curious... (insinuating) what that would be like?...
Rachel: But why, why not?
Joey: Because... look, no one wants this to happen more than me, ok? (in a trembling voice) I have gone over this moment in my head a hundred times and not once did I ever say no! (sighs) I couldn't do it to Ross!
Rachel: It's not a big deal!
Rachel: It's so not a big deal!
Phoebe: (looking at Mike) Oh, yeah! (turning to Chandler) Are you telling me you... you're not even... a little turned on by Monica, right now?
Ross: Ooh, well. Ah, I kinda have got a lot on my plate right now, not that I wouldn't love a weekend in the country with a strange man. (Mr. Oberblau giggles)
Chandler: (In a loving voice) Yes, I do. Now, I may not understand why you have to win so badly, but if it's important to you then it's important to me, because I love you.
(They start playing and Chandler does not suck at all)
[Scene: Hotel's bar. Ross is running to Charlie trying not to be seen with two cocktails in his hands. She's hidden behind a huge plant]
Ross: Yeah. The bartender said that they split up into two search parties, the herbivores and the carnivores. (pause) You know, we as a group are not the coolest.
(Three paleontologists walk by and Ross hugs Charlie trying not to be seen)
Ross: I mean, you just went out with my best friend, and I just think it'd be a really really bad idea. (pause) Or-or not! (they kiss passionately)
Phoebe: All right, I will. No, I will. But umm, yknow just remember that its still really early, okay so, if it says that Im not pregnant, that doesnt mean that Im not gonna get pregnant, okay and, and just please, just so I dont go completely nuts, just try not put all your hopes on this.
Mike: Woo-wo-hey-hey-hey... Can we not talk about that right now?
Rachel: (not sure what to do) Uh, it was very nice meeting you. (They continue to ignore her.)
Monica: Yeah, you're my husband. I'm not gonna live in a different state than you for 208 days out of the year.
JOEY'S CO-STAR: Why not? You hate park views and high ceilings? C'mon I'll show you the kitchen.
Rachel: Maybe its not as bad as I think. Yknow, maybe they didnt take it the way I meant it.
Phoebe: Its not kicking me, its kicking one of the other babies. Oh (looks down her dress)! Dont make me come in there!
Ross: Wha? Oh, come on. You didnt have tosaltwater taffy?! (Mona laughs) Thanks! This is interesting. You know, most people think this is made with sea water, but its actually made with, uh, salted fresh water. Thats not interesting.
Rachel: Okay, wait a minute. Wait a minute, I-I-I, I can't do this. Listen honey, this is, it's not Phoebe's fault. She lent me the earrings, and I lost it. I'm so sorry. Honey, I feel terrible too. (Holds out her arms for a hug.)
RTST: It's like I'm lookin' in a mirror. Anyway, they're called "fishtachios". They taste exactly like pistachios, but they're made primarily of reconstituted fish bits. Here, try one. You're not allergic to anything, are you?
Phoebe: Mon', not that you didn�t sound good, but...
Chandler: Don't say Richard! Well, if they're not Monica's and they're not yours, then whose are they?
Joey: No, its not. I mean you-you made me your best man and I totally let you down!
Chandler: Good, God's speed, good people! (he starts to close the door, turns around and sees Wendy) You're not gonna go?
Rachel: All right fine! Youre not invited to the party were gonna have either.
Phoebe: Ooh! No, no, no, no, he's not like a kook, no. He's just like this, this very passionate, incredibly romantic guy, that got like a tinsy bit carried away, you know. And we just get along really well, and he's so cute.
Rachel: And hey! Just so you know, its not that common! It doesnt happen to every guy! And it is a big deal!!
Rachel: No, not even close. Forget Vail, forget seeing my family, forget shoop, shoop, shoop.
Chandler: We're not gonna have this conversation again... Look at this place. Why am I so intimidated by this guy? Pretentious art, this huge macho couch. When we know all he does is sit around all day crying about losing Monica to a real man! (laughs) You don't think he's here, do you? (Joey looks around)
Chandler: Damn! (stands up) The tailpipes not hot enough to light this!
Joey: Am I psyched? The lead in my own TV series? Ive dreamed about this for years! Why have I not been preparing?!
Phoebe: Okay, first I'm not crazy. And second, say it don't spray it. Anyway his name is Malcom, and he wasn't following me, I mean he was, but 'cause he thought I was Ursula, ick. And, that's why, that's why he couldn't just come up and talk to me. 'Cause of the restraining order.
Ross: Really? Its not just frowned upon?
Joey: You don't kiss your friend's mom! Sisters are okay, maybe a hot-lookin' aunt... but not a mom, never a mom!
PHOEBE: Alright, so, what, he's not a famous tree surgeon? And then, I guess, OK, he doesn't live in a hut in Burma where there's no phones?
Ross: Good, 'cause the ladies, not so much. (shakes his head, give him a thumbs up and leaves)
Ross: I am not in love with her. She was very upset about having to move out so I eh, didnt tell her we were still married because she would only get more upset. I-I just comforted her, as a friend.
Monica: Lips moving, still talking. I mean it may not be ideal, but I'm so ready. No, I-I-I see the way Ben looks at you. It makes me ache, you know?
Joey: No it isn't! No, it's not. Because you can also explain it with the truth!
Chandler: Oh thats not true! Thats not true! I got her that backpack and she loved it! I remember how much she was crying the day when that big dog ran off with it (notices the look on Monica and Phoebes faces.) Oh, there was no big dog. All right this sucks! I already got her this briefcase, and I had R.G. put on it (Phoebe looks confused.) Her initials
Dr. Franzblau: I try not to let my work affect my personal life, but it's hard, when you... do what I do. It's like uh...Well, for instance, what do you do?
Melissa: (laughs) Oh you dont have to be (Laughs again) sorry. Im Im obviously kidding. Im not in love with you. (To Phoebe) Im not in love with her. I dont hear coconuts banging together. Yeah, I dont picture your face when I make love to my boyfriend. Anyway, I gotta go. Eh kiss good-bye? (Rachel stares at her stunned.) No? Okay. (Hurries into the cab and drives off.)
Chandler: Thats not backing me up! Look, you said with the off-stage and the heat, and the onstage and the oy heat.
Chandler: Okay. Uh, well dim the lights, dim the lights. (He goes to the light switch and finds its not a dimmer switch when he flips the lights off.) Or turn them out all together. Uh, no scented candles. Okay here. Here we go. (He sprays an aerosol air freshener above her.)
Monica: Okay, Rachel, do you have any idea how painful it is to tell someone that you love them and not have them say it back?
David: Damn it! I-I'm sorry. I-I don't mean that. I-I want you to be happy... But only with me. No, uhm... that's not fair. Uh, who cares, leave him!. Oh, I don't mean that. Yes I do... I'm sorry Uhm, I... I think I should probably uhm... go...
Rachel: Manhattan does not have enough stores.
Chandler: I'm not in charge of where the conference is held. Do you want people to think it's a fake conference? It's a real conference.
Rachel: Ugh, it was horrible! And-and the interview part went so well, y'know? I even made him laugh. He said something about a boat and I was like, "Well, yeah! If you've got enough life jackets!" (She starts laughing; Chandler and Joey are not amused.) Trust me, it was actually, it was very funny. Anyway, so we were saying good-bye and ugh!
Rachel: Okay, um, I...(Phoebe walks into her room.) All right Phoebe look, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry. OK? I handled the situation horribly and I should not have lied to you.
Joey: Or not. Uh, Rach, why dont you just move in with me? (Rachel sighs.)
ESTL: Stop saying you're not talented, you're very talented. It's just with the bird dead and all, there's very little act left. Oh, honey, give me a break, will ya? [a knock on the door] Oooh, ooh, I'll talk to you later.
Eric: I am so stupid. Of course she was lying! Shes not a teacher. Theres not such a thing as the top secret elementary school for the children of spies.
Ross: W-oa � Mommy! (gestures to his not understanding mother)
Rachel: Oh, ju-ju-just stay calm. Just be calm. For all he knows we're just hanging out together. Right? Just be nonchalant. (Joey like stands at attention with his chest forward and his hands on his sides, looking up at the ceiling with his lips pouted.) That's not nonchalant!
[Scene: Ross' apartment, Girl, You'll Be A Woman Soon (the original, not that cruddy Urge Overkill version) is playing. Ross and Celia are kissing passionately.]
Paula: Listen. As someone who's seen more than her fair share of bad beef, I'll tell you: that is not such a terrible thing. I mean, they're your friends, they're just looking out after you.
Emily: No. Thats not what Im saying. I just may know a few things that might help you inflict some pain.
Emily: Oh, no-no-no, thats not rude! Its perfectly in keeping with a trip that Ive already been run down by one of your wiener carts, and been strip-searched at John F. Kennedy Airport, apparently to you people, I look like someone whos got a balloon full of cocaine stuffed up their bum.
Chandler: The agency must have made some mistake. My wife is not a reverend and I'm not a doctor.
Phoebe: Oh, I'm not gonna do this, okay? I'm not gonna eavesdrop on my friend.
Ross: (exhales sarcastically) Not two years in a row.
Phoebe: Oh, well um, not right now. Y'know Im just gonna go to bed, I think the fumes are giving me a headache.
Monica: (To Chandler) We're not really gonna buy these people steak dinners are we?
Peter: Were not throwing it away! I built that canoe! (starts to leave as Tony chases after him)
Ross: (whines "No.") Thats not true!
Rachel: Ohhh... (slumping in relief) Okay, you were right. You were right! This was just not worth it.
Joey: Hey, I'm not that fond of you either, ok buddy? But I'm just trying to be nice for the kids!
RACHEL: Ok, doggie get the- aahhh. Ok go get the sandwich, get the sandwich doggie. [dog ignores the sandwich] Good doggie get the sandwich, get the...ok, Joey, the dog will lick himself but he will not touch your sandwich, what does that say?
Chandler: But we are not the one she chose! How can you feel okay about this?
Phoebe: Ugly Naked Guy's taking his turkey out of the oven. Oh my god. He's not alone. Ugly Naked Guy's having Thanksgiving dinner with Ugly Naked Gal.
Chandler: Joey's not a friend. He's...a stupid man who left us his credit card. Another drink? Some dessert? A big screen TV?
[Scene: Rachels Outer Office, shes returning from lunch to see Tag not doing his sit-ups.]
Monica: Listen umm, Ive been thinking, its not fair for me to ask you to spend all of your money on our wedding. I mean, you work, you work really hard for that.
Joey: (entering) Their not breaking up. Chandler and Janice. Their not breaking up. He didn't blink or anything.
Ross: Sure, I mean, do I wish me and Rachel living together would have worked out? Of course. You know, I'm disappointed, but it's not like it's a divorce.
Drew: Ahh, I just got out of a big relationship, Im not looking for any thing serious.
Chandler: (picking up a plastic cup similar to the one he deposited his specimen in) It is not okay that I'm aroused by this now.
PHOEBE: I'm sorry, but sometimes they need help. That's fine. Go ahead and scoff. You know, there're a lot of things that I don't believe in, but that doesn't mean they're not true.
Joey: Well youre not selling the story! Its like; its like you dont believe it! Look, I gotta go. I got a date, but try this. Do what I do when Im preparing for an audition. Okay? Ill set you up with my video camera and you can record yourself and-and see what youre doing wrong.
Mr. Kaplan: Im not supposed to drink coffee, it makes me gassy.
Rachel: Thank you Joey. You know what? I'm not even sure I can have caffeine.
Chandler: We close escrow tomorrow, so seeing another house can only confuse us, and we're easily confused. We're not very bright.
Ross: Oh yeah! Batch 17 was good. I did not like batch 16. (Burps a little bit.) Im okay.
Ross: Oh. Listen, do you think- and try not to let my intense vulnerability become any kind of a factor here- but do you think it would be okay if I asked you out? Sometime? Maybe?
Ross: Youre not a lefty?
Joey: Ah, can I just say I know we're doing this for Ross, and that's cool, but if it was up to me, this is not what we'd be doing on our first date.
Ross: Oh, I uh, just came by to pick up my skull. Well, not mine, but...Susan: Come in.
[Scene: The Airport, Chandler and Monica are following the previous couple through a tiny hallway that proves this is a set on a sound stage and not an actual airport, and see them enter the first class lounge.]
Rachel: Oh, that's okay, girls tend not to like me.
Amy walks over to the couch and sits down next to Rachel: Ucch. <pauses> Uchh <louder this time> In case you hadn't noticed, I'm not talking to you.
Monica: So great! He showed me where the restaurant's going to be. It's this, it's this cute little place on 10th Street. Not too big, not too small. Just right.
Ross: N-no! Okay? Weve been through this! Were not gonna get married just because shes pregnant, okay?
CHANDLER: Hey, sorry I'm late. Congratulations, Mon. (to Ross) I'm not sorry I'm late. How incredible was my afternoon with Jade?
(Monica and Chandler do not look amused by Joeys head in the door)
Chandler: Okay. And its not just chicks y'know? Its all kinds of other animals!
Rachel: Relax! Its not like its Citizen Kane!
Chandler: Oh, its not just that, I would be Englands most powerful weapon. Jet setting heartbreaker on her majestys secret service. A man who fears no one; with a license to kill. (Worried.) Would Monica let me wear this?
Monica: (disgusted) Limited seating! Oh, that is such a lame excuse! Thats not the reason shes not inviting me!
Chandler: Couldnt sleep last night you know, then I started worrying about this big divisional meeting that I have later today, the more I worried about it the more I couldnt sleep. Yknow? I was like, if I fall asleep now Ill get six hours sleep, but if I fall asleep now Ill get five hours sleep. Not matter what I did I couldnt fall asleep.
Rachel: Okay, its not Relaxi Cab. Its Relaxicab, like taxicab.
Ross: Oh, man, I'm not going to be able to handle this. (pause) Now I know how my students feel at the end of each year. And why they act out by giving me such bad evaluations.
Phoebe: It's okay, I mean she had a really incredible life. And it's not like I'm never gonna see her again, y'know she's gonna visit.
Joey's Co-Star: Apparently your brain transplant was not entirely successful. It seems your body is rejecting Jessicas brain.
Rachel: Its all gonna be okay. Theyre just so happy that Im not suing them that they gave me one extra month paid maternity leave. So long as I understand that the money should not construed as a down payment on this or any other child I should bear.
Rachel: Oh my you think Im a pushover. Well wait, watch this, you know what? Youre not invited to lunch. What do you think of that? I think thats pretty strong, thats what I think. Come on, Monica, lets go to lunch. (She leaves)
Rachel: Oh yeah! Y'know, if its not a headboard, its just not worth it.
Phoebe: No, no, no, we’re not having a big reception, we took the money we were gonna spend on a wedding and we donate them to the children charity.
Rachel: (grabs Chandler by the shirt) All right, listen, smirky. If it wasn't for you and your stupid balloon, I would be on a plane watching a woman do this (makes a gesture like a stewardess pointing out exits) right now. But I'm not.
Joey: Oh wow Wayne, its not really something you can teach yknow? Its pretty much something youre born with if you(Off Chandlers look)You-you can teach it! Ill show you right how to do it.