words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Monica, and Chandler are sitting on the couch and chair as Phoebe is getting coffee.]
Phoebe: Huh?
Phoebe: Sure. Yeah, hes kinda sexy.
Phoebe: Okay so, well just come up with some kind of signal if its going well you can take off.
Rachel: No Phoebe! I just need you there for support. I havent told him Im pregnant yet.
Phoebe: Oh. Why not?
Phoebe: Oh Rachel, this is all so Papa dont preach.
Rachel: What Phoebe? Wait! One time he caught me smoking he said if he ever saw me doing that again hed make me eat the entire pack.
Phoebe: Wow! Oh well, I will be there!
Phoebe: Gosh. Im not gonna let that man make you eat your baby. (They both sit down by the rest of the gang and Phoebe recognizes a man by the window.) Oh. Hey! Who is that guy? I think I know him.
Phoebe: Oh my God!!! Monica!! Hes the stripper from your bachelorette party!!
Phoebe: Your secret bachelorette party
Phoebe: She untied his G-string with her teeth. (Pause) Somebody stop me!
[Scene: A Restaurant, Rachel and Phoebe are having dinner with Dr. Green, and everyone is looking at the menu.]
Phoebe: Oh, I-I dont eat meat.
Phoebe: Yeah, I dont eat that either.
Rachel: (To Phoebe) In case you didnt notice, that is a scary man.
Phoebe: Hes right though, the 74 is absolute piss.
Rachel: This was such a huge mistake. I cant tell him Phoebe. I cant, I cant, I cant, I cant
Phoebe: Rachel!
Phoebe: Why, so he can get mad at the baby?
Phoebe: Its slang for pregnant.
Rachel: Phoebe!
Dr. Green: Who is the father? Oh no! Please dont tell me its her! (Points at Phoebe.)
Dr. Green: (laughs) Poppy. (To Phoebe) Oh, Im gonna be a poppy. (Stops laughing) So when is the wedding?
[Scene: The Restaurant, dinner has ended and Phoebe and Rachel are talking. Dr. Green is not at the table.]
Phoebe: Im sorry I wont be able to make it to your imaginary wedding, but Im really busy that day. Yeah, I already have a unicorn baptism and a leprechaun bar mitzvah.
Phoebe: Its Lafite. The 74 Latour is actually drinking quite nicely.
Rachel: Really?! The Plaza?!! Oh daddy!! (Hugs him and Phoebe glares at her.) Right. Daddy, I need to talk to you. Please, sit down.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are at the counter as Ross enters.]
Phoebe: Id better go. (She goes and sits down in the La-Z-Boy E-cliner 3000, the chair that Sit magazine called chair of the year, and they both look at her.) Just over here: I dont want to miss the fight.
Phoebe: Thats it?! You call that a fight? Come on! "We were on a break!" "No we werent!" What happened to you two?!
Phoebe: (entering, quietly) Wow, you told your dad the truth.
Phoebe: Wanna go see a movie?
Rachel: Yes! (She gets up and sets the phone on the counter without hanging it up.) Bye daddy. (Phoebe and her leave.)
Phoebe: Not if nothing happens. Why can't... why can't we just hang out as friends?
Phoebe: Well, if you really, really want it, then its okay.
Phoebe: Yes! You know, in six months the Statute of Limitations runs out and I can travel internationally again!
Phoebe: Yeah, kinda.
Ross: Phoebe, forget it, okay? Newark is - is like an hour away. There's no way we're gonna make it in time.
Joey: But Phoebe, wait! Wait! Phoebe. Phoebe! (catches her in the hallway)
Phoebe Sr: Oh, I-I-I understand all that, but its justthat was my puppy.
Phoebe: Oh!
Phoebe: Oh, was I doing it again?
Phoebe: Well, of course it smells really bad. You have your head up a dead animal.
Phoebe: All right, c'mere, gimme your feet. (She starts massaging them.)
Phoebe: It isnt?
Phoebe: Doing it on this table. (points at the table)
(Both Phoebe and him are singing along and they get to the chorus.)
Phoebe: Okay well, he would turn things to gold.
Phoebe: Really?! Really?!
Phoebe: (entering) Hey!
Paolo: (something in Italian, he is apparently attracted to Phoebe)
Phoebe: Me too. Although this city is my home, so. So thats dumb what I said, dont tell him I said that. Umm, you make something up. (Mischa does so and Sergei kisses her hand.) Nice, (to Mischa) thank you. This is me. Here.
Phoebe: Thats a dog, every house should have a dog.
[Scene: Phoebe's dad's house. Phoebe pulls up in the cab with Rachel and Joey in the back.]
Phoebe: The little ones do.
Chandler: Y'know what else I can't believe? I had to kiss Phoebe and Rachel every time I left a room, I mean it's too bad they didn't see us having sex.
Phoebe: Hey!
Ross: Okay, I know what I have to do. Ive got to go Red Ross. (Joey and Phoebe dont know what hes talking about.) Yknow, Red Ross!
Phoebe: Oh, sweetie, oh. (hugs him)
Monica: Its very interesting, Phoebe.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is teaching Leslie how to sing Smelly Cat.]
Phoebe: Yes... I'm sorry, I've never met a boyfriends parents before...
Phoebe: All right, that's it, I quit.
Phoebe: Well not exactly like the one in the poem.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, and Joey are there. Monica is holding a piece of paper.]
Phoebe: Yeah, um, which ones in particular were great for you?
Phoebe: Okay, obviously you dont know much about the U.S. government.
Phoebe: Theyre at the coffeehouse.
(Phoebe gets up from the table, and while her back is turned, Rachel and Monica indicate via sign language that they each would have picked the other.)
Phoebe: Whered you get too? We lost you after you opened up all the presents.
Phoebe: All right. All right! If he wants a date? He's gonna get a date. All right, I'm gonna go in.
Phoebe: All right. Did everyone get out okay?
Phoebe: (entering) Hey!
Ross: No Phoebe, dont look! You dont want to see whats under there!!
PHOEBE: I'd call that excessive.
Phoebe: Ok, this is not about the MONEY, ok? It's about... it's about corporate greed destroying our hearts and leaving us... the hollow shells.
Phoebe: Well if we make it yesterday, woo-hoo! Were done!
Phoebe: Oh my God, are you guys okay?
Phoebe: Oh my God, they took my idea!
Monica: Id like to have Don and Phoebe over. Wouldnt that be nice?
Phoebe: Okay, you said I could sing at your wedding so, Im just gonna need a small deposit.
Phoebe: Oh! You know my friend Abby who shaves her head? She said that if you want to break the bad boyfriend cycle, you can do like a cleansing ritual.
Phoebe: So, I decided Im definitely going to go with either Joey or Chandler.
PHOEBE: Right. My name was on there, but now it just says "carrot cake". So, um, so um, how many chords do you know?
Phoebe: So how are things going with Paul?
PHOEBE: Ok Rachel, make a special flan wish.
Phoebe: Well, maybe its so big because the house was built on radioactive waste.
Jasmine: But you should probably talk to my roommate, because I told him and he knows Phoebe too.
Phoebe: Hi! Wish me luck!
PHOEBE: I know you're just moving uptown but I'm really gonna miss you.
Phoebe: Uh huh. But they're not your friends anymore.
Phoebe: Well, this doesnt have to be so sad though. Yknow? Maybe instead of just thinking about how much youre gonna miss each other, you should like think of the things youre not gonna miss.
Phoebe: Wait, am I missing something though? Cause I thought death was something thats supposed to be sad, in a way.
Rachel: Oh Phoebe, I'm so happy for you honey. (she gives her a kiss)
Joey: Why? Is it because I'm friends with Phoebe?
Phoebe: You'd better get back in that kitchen Monica, the garlic is not gonna overuse itself.
Phoebe: Yeah, umm thats Whitney (Points), Kyles ex-wife out there, now do you think that you can yknow divert her so that we can slip out?
Phoebe: Look, I can't have a wedding with this money now. It's tainted.
Monica: All right Rachel, you sweep behind, Ill pitch it to you, you throw it down field to Phoebe. All right. Break.
Monica: I'm sorry, my friend Phoebe...
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: All right, so let's switch.
Phoebe: (entering from her room) Hey, did she buy it?
Phoebe: Ooh, I have to tell you something.
Phoebe: But I cant tell you.
Phoebe: No.
Phoebe: No.
PHOEBE: Huuh.
PHOEBE: Monica, how did this happen? I thought you had this all planned out.
Monica: Phoebe, you have to lift it and point.
[Scene: Monica's bedroom, Phoebe is trying to relax her.]
Phoebe: I cant!! I cant!! (She dies.) Noooooooo!!!!!!! You son of a bitch!!!!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is recapping last season, and as she talks we see a montague of scenes from Ross and Rachel.]
Phoebe: No.
Phoebe: No.
Phoebe: I cant!!
Phoebe: Y'know what? We thought you were different. But I guess it was just the coma.
Phoebe: Oh my god! Where are you? (Looks around.)
Monica: Y'know what, dont tell us. Well just wait until Chandler gets home, (to Phoebe) because itll be more fun that way.
Phoebe: Okay, yeah. (to Monica and Rachel) Triple A can pick us up.
Phoebe: Yuh-huh! I was the last one to know when Chandler got bitten by the peacock at the zoo. I was the last one to know when you had a crush on Joey when he was moving in. (Monica gestures at Phoebe to shut up; Joey looks surprised but pleased) Looks like I was second to last.
JOEY: Hey. [Phoebe takes off, Joey and Chandler are thrown back in the seat]
Monica: Phoebe?
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: Thanks!
Phoebe: No.
Phoebe: I mean, well, 'cause when I was growing up, you know my dad left, and my mother died, and my stepfather went to jail, so I barely had enough pieces of parents to make one whole one. And here's this little baby who has like three whole parents who care about it so much that they're fighting over who gets to love it the most. And it's not even born yet. It's just, it's just the luckiest baby in the whole world. (pause) I'm sorry, you were fighting.
(Phoebe starts to hang up the phone, but )
Phoebe: I know it's so exciting! You know I've never lived with a guy before.
Ross: (on phone) Okay, Andr� should be there in like 45 minutes. All rightie, bye bye. (to Phoebe) Just easier that way.
Phoebe: Hello. Oh good. Ross could you put up some of these flyers for me? (He smiles at her.) OH!! Demon!! Demon!!
PHOEBE: [Mrs. Adelman's voice] In my day, divorce was not an option.