words in movies
Joey: Rach, I told you everything I knew last night! Look, it's not that big of a deal, so Monica and Chandler are doing it.
Rachel: I can't believe you would say that!
Chandler: Did they teach you that in your anger management class?
Rachel: Pheebs, I dont think anyone's mad about that.
Joey: (eyeing the flattened scone) Anybody gonna eat that?
Both: We can't do that. (They separate.)
Chandler: I asked myself that very question, sir. Uh, (Points to Monica) this is Monica. (Points to his boss.) This is my boss, Doug. Doug this is Monica.
Monica: What was that?
Monica: That noise you just made?
Chandler: Oh, that was my work laugh.
Chandler: And! They like me more just because I was with ya! I think you repaired a lot of the damage from when they met Joey. And Doug wants us to play tennis with them. He's never even talked to me outside of work. Except for that time when we bumped into each other at that strip club. (She glares at him.) Strip church. Anyway, I'm gonna go try and find a racquet.
Chandler: Okay, good luck with that. (Exits.)
Rachel: Well yeah, I do, but I decided to take a long lunch and spend some time with my friend Monica. Y'know I-I feel that we don't talk anymore. How are you? What is new with you?
Monica: Well, I-Ithere was this guy at the bank that I thought was cute umm, but I don't anymore.
Monica: Yes, I'm sure! Rachel is there something that you want to talk me about?
Doug: Well, I gotta tell ya Bing; that partner of yours is a real tiger. (To his wife.) Are you all right sweethart?
Monica: I got it! (She hits a forehand smash that bounces right in between Doug and Kara and scores a point.)
Chandler: Okay y'know what, because you said that, I'm not putting out tonight.
Janice: Oh! Okay! (To Ross) You, Mister Right Place at the Right Time, call me! (Does her famous, or is that infamous, laugh and exits.)
Ross: Okay, I didn't know you would say that.
Rachel: (entering) Okay, I have to tell you something that I have never admitted during our entire friendship! But, when we were in high school I made out with James Farrell even when I knew that you liked him! Wow, that feels so good to get off my chest! Okay, you go!
Rachel: I overheard you guys on the phone the other day, and you said, "I'll just tell Rachel that I'm doing laundry for a couple of hours." And he said, "Laundry? Is that my new nickname?" And you said, "No! You know what your nickname is, Mr. Big."
Monica: Well. Sounds like you're writing yourself a little play there Rach. Wow! Let me know how that one turns out.
Rachel: Well, I wouldn't know because I got so freaked out that I hung up the phone.
Rachel: All right. So you're telling me that there is nothing going on between you and Chandler.
Phoebe: You don't need Janice for that, you've got us. We
Doug: But seriously, I believe that we should all support President Clinton. And her husband Bill. (Chandler does the laugh.)
Doug: Well, maybe I'll bring it out and have Monica stick her finger in it. That oughta sweeten it up, huh? (Once again, with the laugh.)
Monica: (To Chandler) How does that laugh not give you a headache?
Monica: Y'know, I-I-I don't think that I can. So if you don't mind, maybe this will be it for me on the work things.
Monica: (interrupting) Honey, I just don't think that you understood the joke.
Monica: Yeah! I mean it was really funny, I-I just don't think you got it. You see Kara's coffee is-is-is weak tasting, okay? But-but what Doug was-was imply that it was weak physically. You get it now honey?
Rachel: What?! She just called and said that she was gonna be working late! She keeps lying to me! That's it! Y'know what? I'm just gonna go over there and confront them right now!
Chandler: (from his bedroom) All right, so you're telling me that I have to tell racist jokes now?!
Monica: I know! It's just that ever since high school Rachel was the one person I told everything too. Y'know? I miss that so much now. She's my best friend.
Monica: Wh-wh-what are you doing here? (She tries to pull her shirt down to cover the fact that she's wearing men's boxers.]
Monica: Great! Umm, well what-what I was doing in Chandler's room is that umm, I was cleaning it! In fact, he pays me to clean it!
Monica: Y'know when I said to you earlier that I was at work umm, I'm at my new work.
(Monica motions that it went right over Rachel's head.)
Janice: No-no-no, no. I'm going to talk. I believe that the sun has set on our day in the sun.
Ross: Let-let me make sure I'm hearing this right, you're ending this with me because I'm too whiney? (Janice makes an agreeing sound.) So you're saying, I've become so whiney that I annoy you, Janice.
Chandler: (realizes what Ross just said and the implications to him) I am mad! But you know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna forgive you! Because that's what friends do! They forgive their friends when they do everything you just said, all on the list there. Well, but I want you to remember that I forgave you.
Chandler: I also want you to remember that I let you live here rent free!
Chandler: And, I want you to remember that I gave you twenty (counts his money) seven dollars. No strings attached. Now, if you can't remember that, I think we should write it downlet's write it down!
Ross: Wha... what you really think we can do that?
Chandler: Yeah, so, what's that supposed to mean?!
MONICA: There's no man in here.� How dare you accuse me of that.� (She slaps Chandler.)
Chandler: Well, thats the part where you tell him that I moved to France. When actually Ill be in Cuba.
Chandler: And there's not chance that will work?
Chandler: Big picture please! So I was in the gift shop, and thats when I uh, saw this. (He holds up a little, tiny baby jumper that reads I (heart) New York.) Yeah, yknow what? I thought anything that can fit into this, cant be scary.
Rachel: Zelner! Right! I knew that! I really, really want this job and I think, I think I would be really good at it.
Charlie: I didn't do that.
Rachel: Okay, y'know what uh, actually, that's great. That helps a lot. Thanks. (She leaves them to wrestle.)
Chandler: Well she, she wouldnt do that, shes with, shes with me.
Chandler: What a minute, I know that hat! I was taken aboard that hat! They did experiments on me! I cant have children!!
[Scene: The fire escape, Joey is now hanging off of the bottom rung of the ladder that wont move and Ross is watching from above.]
JADE: Hey, Bob, it's Jade. Listen, I just wanted to tell you that I was really hurt when you didn't show up the other day, and just so you know, I ended up meeting a guy.
Ross: Yes! Thats where we realized we were both super cool people!
Ross: Wow. Umm Huh I'm-I'm not sure what to do with that right now.
Ross: Youre not getting away this time mister! Unless you want that ass kicking we talked about!
Monica: I'm not always that bad!
Rachel: I don't care about any of that!!
Chandler: You're damn right I'm right. I say you show this guy what you're made of. I say you stand your ground. I say you show him that you are the baddest hombre west of the lingerie.
Rachel: Oh well, you dont want to do that now?!
Joey: (coming in from his bedroom) What is that?
Phoebe: Me taking care of you is no problem, huh? You guys feel safe. Right? Okay, Im gonna take that spit bubble as, "Yeah, I do!" Okay, after I get rid of this dirty diaper Leslie, Ill set you up with a clean one. (She throws it at the garbage without looking, misses, and knocks over a vase and flowers, which fall to the floor and break.) Okay, Im sorry. I didnt mean to scare you. I just have to clean that up. Okay? Cause lets face it, were at Monicas. (She crawls over, disposes of the diaper, picks up the flowers, and the vase.) I broke it. All right. Well, thats just the way that goes. (She throws out both the flowers and the vase.) Okay, good. (She turns around and only counts two babies.) Why are there only two of you? Where is Leslie? Well, you cant answer. (She starts looking for her) Leslie? Where are you Leslie? Leslie, now would be a good time for your first words! (She turns around and finds that Leslie has managed to crawl into the bottom drawer of the TV cabinet.) Well, look at you! Hey! You are a little bit mischievous! My gosh! (She picks her up and notices a surprise is waiting in the drawer.) Oh, youre a lot mischievous! Well, itll dry. (Closes the drawer with her foot.) (To Leslie) Okay, you sit with your brother and sister nowwho arent there! (They both have disappeared as well.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that morning. The porn is still on, there are three women getting ready to shave the chest of some guy. Joey and Chandler are wondering why that guy is letting them shave his chest, and Monica and Rachel are eating breakfast at the foosball table.]
Rachel: No! No! No! No its not! No its not! Come on! Phoebe, ours is totally different! I mean we dont have the (Looks desperately for something different.) We dont have the that lamp! And-and that screen is yknow, on the other side.
Monica: Ohh, I've always wanted to go to this culinary fair that they have in Jersey!
Chandler: Shes moving on! Okay, if its not this guy, its gonna be somebody else! And unless youre thinking about subletting my peep hole, you are going to have to get used to the fact that the relationship is over! Okay, man? Its over.
Ross: Posting that I died? That really isn't funny.
Monica: Yeah. Hey, that was nice of you guys to back off and let Joey get the girl for once.
Rachel: But that wasn't gonna stop you before!
Rachel: Yeah, I said what was okay when I thought she was some weird bald chick. I mean, y'know, that girl has hair got all over head!
RYAN: [Comes out of the bathroom, also with oven mits on his hands.] Well that wasn't easy.
Monica: Ohh, sweetie! (Goes to comfort her.) Hey, I bet you anything that hes gonna call you again.
Chandler: Dont take this personally okay? Its just that I just cant have sex with a sick person.
Mike: You know, you should really look in a mirror before you call yourself that.
Ross: And what(notices the stenographer is still typing)What are you typing that for? Did you hear what she said? We dont get the annulment. Dont type that! What?! Stop typing! (He goes over to where the stenographer is typing and in the process pushes Rachel out of his way.) Hey! Stop typing! (Hes still typing.) Stop typing! Stop typing!!
Ross: I knew that was him!
Joey: (thinking) All right. Its a new day. All that stuff about Rachel, you dont feel that now. It was crazy! Youre fine. Youre better than fine! You are, as your friend Tony would say, Grrrreat! Everythings normal! Shes just your friend Rachel! Your friend Rachel. Your friend! Rachel.
Phoebe: Oh no-no, no, I made a promise to myself that the next time I would talk to Ursula would be over my dead body. And thats not happening til October 15th, 2032.
Phoebe: You can't do that!
Ross: That depends, how much did you hear?
Phoebe: Is that Ross?
Joey: Well uh, I went down there and told him that no one treats my friends like that and that hed better come up here and apologize. Ill see you later. (Starts to leave)
Chandler: And I don't wanna say this, I don't you guys to hate me, but uh, I don't think, I can be around that dog anymore. Okay, so either the dog goes, or I go. (An awkward silence ensues.) Oh my god!!
Frank Sr.: Well Lilly, when you see Lilly would you give her that, that note? Because I wanted to talk to her at the memorial but, well I pictured her getting mad at me the way you got mad at me and I well, I chickened out. So, uh, I wrote her that note, would you give it to her please?
Rachel: Ooh! You guys are so lucky you are here with people, you known it's such a romantic place. That's all, I just wish I could (looks at Joey who is at the check in desk) share that with a guy.
RACH: Oh yeah, c'mon, I'm movin' on. He can press her up against that window as much as he wants. For all I care, he can throw her through the damn thing.
Rachel: Oh come(Stutters)Of course I know that. I mean of course you never leave a baby alone! I mean who wouldshe wouldnt be safe as she would be with me, the baby dummy. Oh God, okay. Yknow what? I think opening the presents right now is a little overwhelming right now. So I think umm, Im just gonna maybe open them a little bit later, but thank you all for coming. And for these beautiful gifts, and this basket is beautiful.
MONICA: I'm sorry that I borrowed your gloves [pulls Rachel's gloves out of her purse]
(they rush to the wall to Rachel and Joey's, and we move to that room)
Joey: Come on! Look just-just telllet her know that you really want them to be there. Lets not forget, this is a woman that has sent you many lasagnas over the years.
Phoebe: Oh, hi Chandler. It's Phoebe. Uhm... I know that Monica is working today so...(back to Central Perk) ...I was wondering if you want to come to the movies with me and Rachel.
Rachel: Yeah. So yknow, I have all of these feelings and I dont know what to do about them, because I cant date like a normal person, which is fine because I dont need a relationship, I mean all I really want is one great night. Just sex, yknow? No strings attached, no relationship, just with someone that I feel comfortable with and who knows what hes doing. For just one great night, I mean is that really so hard to find. (Looks at Joey.) So how was your day?
Phoebe: So what?! That doesnt give you the right to ditch me!
Rachel: Nothing! Oh God, we're just so excited that you want to get this apartment!
Monica: Chandler, there is nothing in there that concerns you! If you love me you-youll let it go.
Chandler: No. No. Were not gonna do that, yknow why? Because its not an even trade.
Rachel: Wow, he's cute, Pheebs! But I thought you just started dating that Kindergarten teacher.
Ross: Wha... (gasps) What? What would give you that idea?
Joey: Thank you. (stands up and kisses her lips.) Waiter! �lright, this is gonna be fast, so try to keep up: Risotto with the shaped truffles and the roasted rip steak with the golden Chanterelles and a Bordelaise sauce and that any that stuff I just said means snails. (Hope, *I* kept up.)
Phoebe: Ooh, that was fast.
Joey: Thank you. Yeah, I appreciate that.
C.H.E.E.S.E: You can say that again Mac.
Tag: No. We had a really good talk. I dont think Im gonna do that bar scene anymore.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Monica are still debating about how to tell Rachel that Chandlers moving in and shes moving out.]
Monica: Okay, heres your milk. What do you want to talk about? (She sees that Chandler has fallen asleep and slams the door loudly to wake him up.)
[Scene: Chandler's hotel room, he's sitting there with Joey who's talking about his helmet and running his hand through that feathery thing at the top.]
Joey: I know; that just pushes them further and further apart.
Chandler: That was not a security blanket! That was a wall-hanging!
Ross: He hasnt gotten out of that chair in two days.
Monica: Honey, you know I think you're hilarious! Come on, you know that joke you told me last week? The one about Jerry Lewis and the girl with the lazy eye...? (he laughs) That slayed me.
Monica: Thanks, that would be great. Hey, honey, wouldn't that be great?
Joey: (to Kathy) I'll be right back. (to Chandler) What was that?
Mrs. Green: No dear, thats what babies do.
Rachel: (now looking up at the ceiling) That is hard to say, Ross. That is hard to say.
Joey: Why would you ruin it, who was that hurtin'?
Joey: Yeah, I didn't throw any of that out..
PHOEBE: [pauses the tape] Ok, Ben, this is the part where Ernie buries Bert in the sand and can't find him. Now, I've looked ahead on the tape and he does find him again. But, ok, before that happens, there's some pretty rough goin' for a while but I think we can handle it. And, there's just the alphabet but we know that ends well so. Ok, here we go. [starts the tape again]
Chandler: Yeah, I know, I did that two minutes ago.
Ross: That is gonna hurt tomorrow!
Phoebe: Alright, so that leaves Chandler.
Kim: My late husband gave me that lighter. (Rachel laughs.) I'm not kidding.
Ross: Phoebe, she doesnt know that you sneak out every night, she doesnt know that you sneak back every morning, and she doesnt know that youve been living with your Grandmothers for a week now.
Rachel: Oh, why do you even bother? I already ruined her first birthday... And do you know how important these early experiences are Ross? Very! According to the back cover of that book that you gave me.
Bill: What? Where did you hear that?
Trudie Styler: Oh no, I know that wouldnt work. My husbands in concert.
Monica: God, Ross is on a date with your sister! How weird is that?!
Rachel: Yeah! Remember I got that uh, gala.
Chandler: Oooh, did he put a little starch in your bloomers? (Sits up) Who said that?
Phoebe: Oh, okay, I'm having another one! This one doesn't hurt eitherOoh, yes it does! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ooh! (Checks under the blanket.) Oh, I was kinda hoping that was it.
Rachel: I was just going to say that I left my keys.
Phoebe: C'mon Mike, you can beat her! Knock that dog off her head!
PHOEBE: OK. I just met this producer of this like, teeny record company, who said that I have a very fresh, offbeat sound and she wants to do a demo of Smelly Cat.
Chandler: Was that place... The Sun?
Ross: Oh, come on! Rach, it's-it's not that bad.
Phoebe: Theres a reset button?! Ugh, thank you! Thank you! (He exits and she goes to shut it off.) Theres a reset button! My God! Why didnt I see that! (She takes off the plastic cover and looks for the button.) Reset button, reset button, where is there a reset button? (Finds it.) Oh here it is! (Picks it up off of the floor.) Oh! (She presses it hard, but of course it would help if the button was still attached to the detector. In frustration she presses it so hard it causes pain in her thumb.) Ohh, God!
Chandler: You didn't like that?
Chandler: Sure! Thats one of the great things about being engaged. Im not nervous talking to pretty girls anymore.
Rachel: Yes oh(To Ben)Do I want sugar in my coffee? (Ben nods no.) No, just some milk would be good Carol. Thanks. (To Ben) Okay, do you remember all that stuff I taught you yesterday?
MR. GELLER: Gosh, we talked about that but your brother has so many science trophies and plaques and merit badges, well we didn't want to disturb them.
Joey: Really?! I like your natural color. Come on man, its a great part. Look, check it out. Im the lead guys best friend and I wait for him in this bar and save his seat. Listen-listen. Im sorry, that seats saved.