words in movies
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Monica and Phoebe are showing everyone the van they bought for the catering business. Its an old Dodge van, that has a cartoon woman riding on a dragon painted on the side of it.]
Joey: I think I know that girl.
Monica: (to Phoebe) Remember that guy from cooking school I told you about that put cilantro with everything?
Phoebe: Oh, in that case(hops up and down in joy)Yay! (Monica looks confused) That was me hopping on board.
Ross: I dont know, I could maybe go out for a couple of beers, but theres this thing about bumblebees on The Discovery Channel that I was planning to watch.
Joey: Really. And what do you mean you never have fun anymore? You have fun with me, remember that time we saw those strippers and you paid me 50 bucks to eat that book?
Joanna: (interrupting) Okay, but that would actually be a big step down for me.
Joanna: Really? Well, in that case
Rachel: (interrupting) And thats Im so glad theres no problem.
Joanna: Thats fine, actually Im on the hiring committee, so therell be at least one friendly face.
Rachel: Ohh! Thats great!
Joanna: You know, Junior Miss is where I started. Oh, I had to sleep with the ugliest guy to get that job.
Joanna: No-ho-ho! (pause) Yeah. (pause) I mean, no-no-no-no-no, dont you worry, Im sure with your qualifications you wont need to sleep with some guy to get that job. Although, I might need some convincing.
Rachel: Well, they uh, they-they do more than that.
Mrs. Lynch: I notice that youve been trusted with a lot of rather important responsibilities.
Rachel: I-I-I of course, I have more responsibilities than that.
Mr. Posner: Yes, thats very good. Now a uh, big part of this job is cultivating personal relationships, especially with designers.
Rachel: Yes, I realize that
Joanna: (interrupting) And Rachel shouldnt have any problem with that. The only problem might be getting a little too friendly, if you know what I mean.
Phoebe: Ooh, I gotta go. I found a guy that who could fix up the van for catering.
Allesandro: Well, you said that we except the Discover Card, which we do not!
Monica: All right, that Ill retract. But I stand by my review, I know food and that wasnt it. Youre marinara sauce tasted like tomato juice! You should serve it with vodka and a piece of celery.
Allesandro: Hey! Im proud of that sauce, its delicious.
Monica: Oh my God! You own an Italian restaurant and you think that tastes good?! Where are you even from?
Rachel: (entering Joannas office) Umm, Joanna? I wanna talk about that interview.
Rachel: No! It didnt! Thats what I want to talk to you about. (starts to break up) Now, just to brief you (starts to cry) I may cry, but they are not tears of sadness or of anger, but just of me having this discussion with you.
Joanna: What?! What would make you think that?
Rachel: Well of those things that you said in the interview, I mean if you believe any of them, I must not be a very good assistant. Yknow what? I am just gonna pack up my desk, (She goes over to get all of her belongings from the desk, which amount to a muffin and a pen) and I will be gone by the end of the day! (Realizes she has nothing.) Well, I guess theres no use to me sticking around til the end of the day! (Starts to leave.)
Joanna: Thats why I said all those things about your flirting and your drinking
Joanna: Oh, I mustve said that after you left.
Joanna: That you enjoyed the occasional drink ing binge.
Rachel: Oh my God!! Ohh, that is it! Im leaving! You are just a horrible person!
Rachel: Say more things like that.
Joey: Well, we could do that!
Chandler: Remember that really cold morning, you woke up and those dogs were licking your face?
Monica: Ohh! Umm, Phoebe, I kinda need to talk to you about that. (Rachel excuses herself) Umm, well I-I-I think it might be time for me to take a step back from catering.
Joey: We dont need that wizard guy. We hit a couple of clubs, talked to some strangers, and uh, after this, well head down to the docks and see about that boat thing.
Ross: Im just glad I brought that extra pair of socks, yknow? I used them as mittens, I didnt want to touch a thing in that last place.
Monica: All right, Ive got a whole bunch of uh-uh, stuff in this area, but umm, Im getting the feeling that you dont want to deliver.
Monica: Okay. Im guessing that if you dont want to deliver, you probably dont want to pick stuff up either.
Phoebe: Yeah. Thats what you really want. Yeah, I dont want to be the reason youre unhappy, that would just make me unhappy, and I really dont want to be the reason Im unhappy.
Mrs. Lynch: I didnt realize that she was so close.
Rachel: Yes, so close. Mrs. Lynch, I know that this is an emotional and difficult time, for all of us. But by any chance did Joanna send any paperwork your way before it happened.
Mrs. Lynch: No. Nothing. Imagine, if she had just stepped off that curb a few seconds later.
Allesandro: Im so excited about having Monica come on board with us. Although I do feel bad about having fired chef Emillio, its like losing a member of the family. Of course, that literally is the case for several of you. Tony, Carlos, Marie, please, tell your father how much were gonna miss him. Now, I know that Monica has a lot of great ideas for this place, well, you all read the review. So without much further ado, I present to you our new head chef.
Monica: Umm, I just wanna say, uh (reads from a 3 X 5 card) that with a pinch of exictement, a dash of hard work, a dollup of cooperation, we can have the recipe... (Looks up and sees eveyone glaring at her) Are you gonna kill me?
Frank Sr.: Yes. Yes it is. I burned the formula and I put your diapers on backwards. I mean, I made up a song to sing you to sleep, but that made you cry even more!
Rachel: Yeah but, you dont, you dont, you dont want to try to much too fast. Yknow? I mean, you do remember what happened to the little girl that tried to much too fast dont you?
Phoebe: That is so cruel! Why? Why would a parent name their child Bethel?
SUSIE: OK, well then who was the kid that got caught masturbating?
Monica: All right then, go fight for her! Go to London! I mean, that could be you and Emily! (Points to the TV.) That, but-but nicer. Just, go to London!
CHANDLER: Well, that makes me feel so good.
Joey: But hey, listen just so you know, you might have youre work cut out for you. Cause when I talked to her, I kinda got the feeling that shes into some other guy. So
Ross: Thats a different issue. Uh, the point is, when the baby comes I will be there to to feed her and bathe her and change her. And more than that I want to do all those things.
Rachel: Oh my God! Thats so great! Im so happy for you guys!
Ross: Uh-huh, I see that.
Joey: Thats Fergie baby!!
Chandler: Then why didnt you tell me to do that?!!
Rachel: Okay uh, but before you do that. I-I, I need you to talk to me.
Rachel: Awww, stop. Come on. Now go shave that head!
Rachel: Sure, you know what? Come on, well just tell them that there was like a problem with like the "engine".
Phoebe: Oh thats so sweet thanks.
Monica: Look, I know that you're in a place right now where you really need to hate Julie's guts, but she didn't do anything wrong. I mean, she was just a girl who met a guy, and now they go out. I really think that if you gave her a chance, you'd like her. Would you just give that a chance, for me?
Chandler: Yeah, Im putting my foot down. Yeah look, when I proposed I told you that I would do anything to make you happy, and if having the perfect wedding makes you happy then, then thats what were gonna do.
Chandler: Yes that was a nice place!
Bob: I want to talk to that bastard, see what his problem is.
Rachel: So, pretty much around the same time that you started telling this story.
Rachel: I dont know. I dont know how I feel. This is all happening so fast. I have to make all these decisions that I dont want to make. (Takes another sip of champagne and spits it back out) Somebody just take this away from me!!
Ross: That was going to be my next argument.
Joey: (frustrated) Ahh! There's gotta be a way. I mean, you know, if Monica and Chandler move out here and now Phoebe is married to Mike. That just leaves me and Ross and Rach, you know what I mean?
Ross: (laughs as well, but for a different reason) Yeah, I didnt think of that.
Paul: Ross, look, I know Ive been giving you a lot of jabs and its partly because Im very protective of Lizzie, and partly because well, they just keep coming to me. But I have to admit that after all the wonderful things that Lizzie has told me and the many, many, (pause) many stories that Rachel has told me that, well (pause) youre not (pause) all bad.
Amanda: Oh! Bugger. Should I not have said that? I feel like a perfect arse!
Mr. Geller: Oh, I'm not falling for that one!
Monica: Oh, I don't know. Maybe, um, "That was nice?" Admit something to me? "I'll call you?"
Chandler: But I am willing to offer her all those things. This was just a plan, yknow? A way to throw her off course so that when I offered her all these things, shed be surprised!
Monica: Uh, look, Larry honey, umm, I wrote the book on Section 5 and I know that you don't have to wear your hat unless you're in the kitchen.
Rachel: This bench, its hollow! I cant believe I never knew that! (She pushes all the pillows off it and opens it up) Oh, the presents!!!
Ross: Thanks for the coffee, or bedankt voor de koffie, Gunter. (He translates that phrase into Dutch.)
Monica: The woman that got married a bunch of times and killed herself when you were 13?
Ross: Hey. So I uh, I didn't get that apartment. Some problem with my application.
Monica: She has to know that your not ready.
Chandler: Oh, yeah. (Starts to take it off and then realizes) Uh, no you cant have my jacket! Because then I would be cold! If you thought that you were going to be cold, you shouldve brought your own jacket. But uh, other than that, are you okay? Are you okay?
Rachel: Ok, well this is like that...in no way. I had a...I had a dream last night that I wanted to kiss Joey.
Monica: Thats very funny!
Joey: If you said it like that, you probably did, yeah.
Chandler: Oh that's so cool! Why would a cop come in here though? They don't serve donuts. (No one laughs.) Y'know what actually, could you discover the badge again? I think I can come up with something better than that.
Chandler: Alright, lo�look. I don�t smoke anymore. But if the rest of you want to light up, go ahead, it�s fine. (everyone lights up) So you all smoke then? That�s almost rude, that I�m not.
Joey: Now hold on a second, fifth floor against that back wall?
CHANDLER: It's not that hard to learn. And as for people realizing you have no idea what you're doing, hey, you're an actor. Act like a processor, people will think you're a processor.
Chandler: I have a weird feeling about this place. (pause) How do I know that they are not gonna secretly videotape me and put it all over the internet.
Joey: You're smart. I like that.
Rachel: (laughs) You ah, you didnt say Yes to that did you?
Phoebe: Oh yknow whats sadder than this? Bambi. I cried for three days with that movie. No wait two! Because on the third day my mother killed herself so I was partly crying for that.
Rachel: How could you not tell me that she has hair?
LITTLE BULLY: Is that supposed to be funny?
Chandler: Well, I don't know what mad him so mad, y'know? All I said was that uh, I didn't think this wasn't gonna be his big break, that this movie wasn't going to do anything for him, and that uh, y'know it didn't sound like a real movie--Okay, he should've pushed me off of the bridge.
Monica: All right. (Looking through a box.) Op, here it is! Right underneath the can of-of bug bomb. I wonder if the best place to put something that cooks food is underneath the can of poison?
Chandler: And you're okay with that?
Rachel: That was not funny!
Jill: My God, you're choking! (she runs over and gives him the Heimlich, the gum flies from his mouth) That better?
Ross: Oh, great! Listen, oh I had to get you a whole new battery. I got you the best one I could, cause thats not where you want to skimp.
Joey: (holding a box) Well, remember when they got in that big fight and broke up and we were all stuck in her with no food or anything? Well, when Ross said Rachel at the wedding, I figured it was gonna happen again, so I hid this in here.
Joey: That makes sense!
Monica: Hey! Didnt you have that outfit on last night?
Monica: (grabbing the picture) Give me that!
Chandler: So I have a flaw! Big deal! Like Joey's constant knuckle-cracking isn't annoying? And Ross, with his over-pronouncing every single word? And Monica, with that snort when she laughs? I mean, what the hell is that thing? ...I accept all those flaws, why can't you accept me for this?
Chandler: (To Phoebe) Is that Joey?! (She nods yes) Let me talk to him!
Phoebe: I wouldn't say never, you know there's that guy (pause) well what about (pause) ok well there's gotta be someone.
Phoebe: I love you. But I never needed a proposal from you. I just needed to know that we were headed somewhere, you know, that we had a future.
Rachel: Yeah, ohh! Why, damnit, why did I open my mouth? (In a girlish voice) I have a crush on you; I am attracted to you. (Back to normal again) Gee, I-I know that I freaked him out
Rachel: Do you still have that, um, Navy uniform?
Ross: Thats what you said last night.
Ross: I didn't wanna leave him alone. Alright? We- we had our first fight this morning. I think it has to do with my working late. I said some things that I didn't mean, and he- he threw some faeces...
Rachel: What? Uhh, Phoebe, honey, honey, I know you're quirky and I get a big kick out of it, we all do actually, but if you destroy a coat like this that is like a crime against nature! Not nature, fashion!
Cheryl: Oh, yeah. Oh, you know, that's too bad that didn't work out.
Ross: Or that.
Lauren: Oh but then, they went and dropped you down that elevator shaft.
Rachel: Okay, I heard that.
Chandler: That is a bad interview.
Rachel: I dont know, his uh, his hair never really bothered me that much, and yknow it was always more crunchy than it was greasy.
RACHEL: That is so unfair.
Rachel: You know how much I love that T-shirt! You never even where that T-shirt!
Joey: Me too. I mean I havent thought at all about how I put myself out there and said all that stuff and how you didnt feel the same way about me and-and how it was really awkward.
JOEY: Well OK then. [oven timer goes off behind Chandler] Was that the oven timer?
Tour Guide: Thats just the way it is.
Rachel: How would you like to sit in a chair that fully reclines, has a rolling massage, and speakers in the head rest?
Emily: Ross, are you there? Ross, I dont know if you can hear this but (Ross has moved to the window, apparently so that he can hear better.) Im gonna talk anyway, uh, Im in the States with you sister and your friends and its all over with Colin. I came here to tell you that, and to tell youYes, Joey you can have all the chocolate you want, just take it! Uh, I came here to tell you that I love you.
Phoebe: Yeah that was lucrative! Smart like your brother!
Chandler: All my energy is going into not asking that question. I cant believe I screwed this up!
Gunther: That guy (points) has been waiting for his coffee for ten minutes! Hes complained about you three times! (He hands the coffee cup to Joey, assuming that Joey will deliver it and walks away.)
Phoebe: (after he's gone) I am so sorry you got caught in the middle of that. I didn't mean to be so out there. I am furious with him!
Chandler: When did that happen to you?!
Rachel: Well, honey that was pretty obvious.
Monica: That was unbelievable!
Phoebe: That chick can't handle my corner.
Rachel: Y'know what? I think we can just leave it at that. It's kinda like a symbolic gesture...
Phoebe: Oh yes, yes, yes you can. Just say, um, 'Phoebe, my work is my life and that's what I have to do right now'. And I say 'your work?! Your work?! How can you say that?!'. And then you say, um, 'it's tearing me apart, but I have no choice. Can't you understand that?'. And I say (Hits him) 'no! No! I can't understand that!'.
Chandler: Look, we just think that maybe she's being a little unreasonable.
Chandler: Phoebe thinks you and Don are soul mates, and I dont believe in that kind of stuff. But then you two totally get along. So look, I wont stand in your way if you want to run off with Don and live in a house of cheese.
Monica: (to Phoebe) You start working on that list. (She grabs her coat and leaves, too.)
Phoebe: Okay, now would you say that thats more than 50 yards away from Sting, his wife, or a member of his family?
(She puts her hands over her breasts and indicates that the coworkers boob job resulted in one pointing up and one pointing down with her hands by pointing up with one hand and down with the other.)
Monica: (on phone) Uh, Michelle. Yeah, that was me, I-I dialed your number by mistake. (listens) Oh, you're so sweet. Yeah, we were a great couple. I know I really miss him. Well, you know how it is, it's that....
The Doctor: It says here that the knife went right through your shoe.
Rachel: Thats weird, she locked the door.