words in movies
Rachel: No. Joey, she knows! We were at Ugly Naked Guy's apartment and we saw them doing it through the window. (Joey gasps) Actually, we saw them doing it up against the window.
Joey: Yes, but y'know what? It doesn't matter who knows what. Now, enough of us know that we can just tell them that we know! Then all the lying and the secrets would finally be over!
Phoebe: Or, we could not tell them we know and have a little fun of our own.
Phoebe: Well y'know every time that they say that like they're doing laundry we'll just give them a bunch of laundry to do.
Joey: No-no-no! No-no wait Rach, you know what would even be more fun? Telling them.
Phoebe: No! You don't have to do anything! Just don't tell them that we know!
Rachel: (To Phoebe) So umm, how-how are we gonna mess with them?
Joey: Well I didn't tell them!
Monica: Them?! Who's them?
Joey: I'm sorry! But hey, it's over now, right? Because you can tell them that you know they know and I can go back to knowing absolutely nothing!
Ross: Look I've already looked at like a thousand apartments this month and none of them even compares to that one!
Monica: (in the kitchen with Chandler) Look at them, they're-they're panicked!
Phoebe: But you-you cant leave me with them! We-were a team! Were playing a zone! Theyre gonna triple team me!
Chandler: Eight and a half hours of aptitude tests, intelligence tests, personality tests... and what do I learn? (he taps the results and reads them) "You are ideally suited for a career in data processing for a large multinational corporation."
(They go through the doors into the trauma room, opening them by ramming the gurney through them, only Chandler's foot is hanging off the end and he screams in pain.)
Kathy: Yeah, they teamed us up as partners. Joey picked three scenes for us to do; all of them had us making out.
Mr. Geller: So, I think youre boxes are over here. (They walk over to them.)
Janice: (Startles them) There you are! Haaah, you got away from me!
Rachel: Aside from the fact that you said you had them?
Rachel: Look I know she's a little tough to take. She has no where else to go, and she's my sister. Alright, she's Emma's aunt. And I would like them to bond.
Ross: Ok, fine, but I don't want them bonding to much. I don't want her telling Emma she needs a nose job.
Monica: Yeah, can we go call them? Is it too soon to call? I wanna call.
Chandler: Oh, well... Maybe I'll join them some time. I just hope the club doesn't slip out of my hand and beat the moustache off his face.
Ross: People ask me why were not together, I just dont know what to tell them.
Ross: Do them!!
Ross: Just ignore them.
Joey: I know; that just pushes them further and further apart.
Rachel: (to Monica): Really? (out loud): Sure, we have scones left! (to Monica): OK, read them to me.
Joey's Doctor: Would you like to see them? (He hands Joey a little jar.)
[Phoebe grabs each of them by an ear]
Ross: Ok, I gotta say. I mean, it means so much to me that you guys are coming all the way over there to hear me do my speech! UH! And I've a surprise, uh... I had to pull some strings but I was able to get everyone passes to the entire conference! That's right! (he gives them their passes) This babies will get you into all the paleontology lectures and seminars.
Chandler: So if you want people to see them, then by definition you're not having them taken out... say, at the break of dawn?
Chandler: All right! (He joins them in the fort and comes up putting on a bonnet.) Isn't this a woman's hat?
Joey: Oh, a couple of nurses asked them out. Maybe they're with them.
PHOEBE: [singing] There'll be times when you get older when you'll want to sleep with people just to make them like you. . . But don't. Cause that's another thing that you don't wanna do, everybody That's another thing that you don't wanna do.
(They all speak at once in general approval of his pants selection; Joey asks where he got them. I can't pick out the rest of it.)
Phoebe: Hey! Ive got a great idea for party favors for the shower. Okay, we get some uh mahogany boxes and carve everyones names in them and inside is everyones individual birth stone.
Joeys Sisters: (entering) Joey!!! Happy Birthday!! (all 7 of them look almost identical)
Joey: Oh, oh! Maybe we can lure them out. You know any birdcalls?
Phoebe: Wait! But Ross if they dont get along then you should smooth things over. Make them be friends.
Rachel: Well-well you can give them to me! I havent felt my feet in years!
Joey: Hi Alex! (to the director) And uh, as you can see my hands are not in my pants. (Holds them both up.)
Monica: What if I turn out the lights? (Runs to shut them off.)
Tag: So when do you imagine you gave them to me? In the morning or in the afternoon?
Rachel: See look Amy, we're a lot closer to Monica and Chandler. We see them every day. And truthfully honey, you don't seem very connected to the baby.
(Notices Ross looking at him and stops. Ross gives him his 'quiet down' maneuver. Okay, this may take a while to explain, so center this on you screen and place your hands about a foot apart with your fingers together and pointing straight up. Now take you fingers and point them at the other hand and making a 90-degree angle with each of your hands and the first knuckle counting up from the wrist. Now take your right hand, no your other right (that was for the dyslexics), and lower it a couple of inches, so that the fingers are pointing at your wrist. Now take your arms and keeping the elbows bent and your hands in front of you spread out your arms, kinda like making a bird's wing. Now hunch your shoulders over and move you hands up and down as if you are trying to tell some one to turn it down. That's Ross 'quiet down' maneuver. Well, there is an accompanying face, but I don't want to try and describe it as well.)
Monica:: then why were you watching them and giving YOURSELF a treat.
Frank Jr. (looks at the triplets): Look at them! Aw. I love you so much. (Strokes Leslie's hair, and she moves a little.) Oh crap, don't wake up, don't wake up!
(Rachel mixes them up in her hands, moves them all around, and puts her hands behind her back.)
(Chandler looks over and sees Ross glaring at them.)
MONICA: I wanna buy 5 shares of SGJ and I wanna buy them now. C'mon time is money my friend. Thank you. Wooo.
Joey: All right look, yknow how-yknow how when youre dating someone and you dont want to cheat on them, unless its with someone really hot?
Chandler: You can wear them with shorts on a street corner and earn the money to pay for them. (Goes and gets some coffee at the counter.)
Phoebe: Broke them all, huh?
Phoebe: Oh my God! (Starts reading them.) Dizziness, nervousness, drowsiness, facial swelling, nausea, headacheHeadache. Vomiting, stomach bleeding, liver damage! Now okay, I dont recall any of this coming up when you gave me these little death capsules! Oh Im sorry, extra strength death capsules!
Chandler: All right look, if youre not gonna stay for me, then at least stay for them! Okay, they have had a very difficult year! What with the robbery and all!
Rachel: Oh they are nice. We-we custom-make tuxedos for celebrities and then when theyre done with them they just send em back.
Tag: Yeah, I filled them out last night?
Rachel: Or Ill give them to my new boyfriend, Joshua.
MONICA: Because. . .� one of them is for you.
RACHEL: Oh.� (to Phoebe) Should we send them something back?
Phoebe: Okay. Rachel, the hottest babies in the Tri-State Area are in this room right now! I overheard one of the judges say that not one of them holds a candle to Emma!
Minister: Ross and Emily have made their declarations and it gives me great pleasure to declare them husband and wife.
Chandler: I sent them home.
[Scene: The Porsche, they have pulled over and are awaiting the cop to come talk to them.]
RACHEL: No!� Wait!� No, no.� Don't do that!� That's going to make them think they can come over here.
Ross: We have to stop them before something happens!
(Rachel decides not to confront them and starts to walk out, knocking over a lamp in the process.)
Monica: Okay. (They walk away to get some privacy.) We have got to beat them! {Here we go yet again.}
Chandler: (to them) Its okay, I got a plan.
Phoebe: No! No! I just went to pick up Phoebe Buffays checks; there were a lot of them.
Joey: We're geniuses! Yeah, look at them, look at them, they're really bonding.
Ross: (stopping them) Okay, that-thats enough! Yknow, lets, lets let someone else play.
Monica: Oh wow wow wow!! Make room for your friend! (sits herself down between them)
ROSS: Oh, now you can exchange them if you want, ok.
Monica: Anyway um, when he left he forgot to take the poem with him. Now, I am like totally dense about poetry, but I think it's pretty good all right. Check it out. (hands them the poem)
[Scene: ATM vestibule, Chandler and Jill are sitting below the counter with two pens dangling from their chains in front of them. Jill is showing Chandler how to swing the pen around his head.]
Monica: Oh, play them!
Monica: (watching a happy couple walk by, arm in arm) Would you look at them. Am I ever gonna find a boyfriend again? I gonna die an old maid.
Rachel: Well sure, if you say youre gonna take care of everything I have no reason to doubt you. Give me those forms! (Grabs them from him.) All right, now Im gonna do this my way and I dont want to hear a peep out of you!
Paul: Oh, here they are right here. (Picks them up from underneath the corner of the couch.)
Monica: Phoebe, we lost half of them.
Chandler: Wow!! Can Joey and I put them on and fight?
Monica: Both of them?
Rachel: Yes! I will! Absolutely! (She takes out his license and her license and holds them face to face with each other. She then proceeds to act like Dark Helmut in Spaceballs, and mimic a conversation between the two of them.) Hello, Rachel. Hi, Joshua. I left my wallet here on purpose. Really? Yes, I just wanted to see you again. Oh, Im glad. Rachel, Id like to say something to you. Yes? How you doin?
Rachel: Yeah, we found them. There were in the guest room closet behind some coats.
Rachel: I know them from work.
Rachel: No, one of them...
(Gary exits and Monica rejoins them.)
{Transcriber's Note: The credits list two characters, Tia and Samantha, who I assume are the sweaty women Joey and Chandler meet. However, I don't know which is which, so I've simply called them Woman #1 and Woman #2.}
Joey: Yep. I just, I just watched her sleep for like hours, just breathing in and breathing out. And then I knew she was dreaming cause, cause her eyes keep going like this. (He closes his eyes and moves them around, kinda like hes been processed by the devil, or something.)
(They don't move, just look all around them.)
The Vendor: Hes just jealous. Youll fit right in; all Londoners wear them!
Chandler: No. But uh, Joey has, and I usually talk to them in the morning time.
Rachel: Gee, I always heard them talk about that, I just always thought that it was a club they went to. Oh God, Im, Im sorry. (walks away)
Ross: (looking astonished) What? NO! I am not going to give them Ben!
Chandler: Why would she use them with Richard and not me? I can be kinky! I once did a naked dance for her... with scarves!
Joey: Yeah, yeah, in honor of their 35th wedding anniversary, I had a star named after them.
(Joey spots them and walks towards them)
(Charlie walks up to them.)
Rachel: Okay, y'know what uh, actually, that's great. That helps a lot. Thanks. (She leaves them to wrestle.)
The Interviewer: But therell be perhaps 30 people under you so you can dump a certain amount on them.
Monica: You what? You said you liked them.
Richard: Oh, Im sorry. (Introduces them.) Lisa, (nodding at each) Monica, Chandler. We used to date.
Phoebe: Yes! I do! All the time! I love them! Oh my God! I did it! Its me! Its me! I burned down the house! I burned down the house!
Phoebe: Fine! (She takes the blanket.) But please God; tell me how to stop them from going off!
Monica: Fine, so you don't like them. Everybody else does.
Monica: Ok, how about this: We got wind up toys for Emma for her birthday. We can make them race, and whoever comes in last, stays!
Chandler: You got a man who's a nanny...? You got a manny...? (Monica starts laughing, but very exaggerated. Joey realises they also should laugh and punches Ross. Now all three of them laugh, but very fake. Chandler seems happy again.)
Rachel: In the afternoon. Mr. Zelner came into my office after lunch. He put them on my desk, and then I put a Post-It on it (Looks down onto her desk and finds the folder with the Post-It on it that contains the contracts she imagined she gave Tag) that said, "Must go out today." So you just keep looking in there! All right?
Joey's Co-Star: Not if we extract tissue from the original host body, synthesize antibodies, and introduce them into your system, which could stop it from rejecting the brain.
Ross: No-no, I took them from the hotel lobby. Yeah, they think they can charge me for some dirty movie and a bag of Mashuga nuts, they got another think coming. (Starts to leave.) Hey! My sweater! Ive been looking for this for like a month!