words in movies
Joey: Oh, cause you can just match the evaluation to the exam with the same handwriting and boom, theres your admirer. (Ross is stunned.)
Joey: No thats not what I was going to say at all. No, what I was going to say is when youre 90 youll still have the memory of what it was like to be with a 20-year-old.
Joey: Hey Chandler! Yknow that girl you went to college with who-who became a movie director?
Burt: (another professor) Wow! It looks like you were very generous with your grades this semester! (Ross frantically starts to change some as a female student, Elizabeth, approaches.)
Elizabeth: Yeah. I felt a little weird about it. Youre a teacher. Im a student. But would you maybe want to go out with me sometime?
Monica: (pulling Rachel back down) Yes, they can stay with us.
Monica: Wow! So, now youre going on a date with this girl?
Monica: Youre right, Im sorry. Its not like youre yknow, going out with an ex-girlfriend.
Monica: All right, well why dont I go out with an ex-boyfriend and do Joey a favor?!
Joey: Hey, you wanna do Joey a favor, maybe you go out with Joey. (He turns around to see Chandler glaring at him.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is having coffee with Dana.]
(They walk into a completely redecorated and repainted room. And of course, the room is immaculate. Only an obsessive-compulsive like Monica could find fault with the room.)
[Scene: A street, Ross is walking with Elizabeth on their date.]
Ross: Oh uh, I had trouble remembering everyones name, so I-I kinda came up with nicknames. Like the guy on the other side of you was Smelly von Brownshirt.
[Scene: Joey's apartment, Ross is telling Monica and Joey about his date with Elizabeth.]
Joey: Hey-hey-hey! So, how did it go with Dana? Any reason I should leave a block of time open say Thursday?
Monica: What?! Youre going out with her again!
Ross: Going out with who?
[Scene: A Restaurant, Chandler is having dinner with Dana.]
Chandler: Well, the heart wants what it wants. Ill see you later. (He runs off and leaves her with the bill, which the waiter promptly delivers.)
Ross: Nothing, Im-Im just, Im so comfortable with you!
Elizabeth: Do you not want to be seen with me?
Ross: What?! No! No! Wait! Youre right, this is stupid. Who cares what people think? I mean, I mean we like each other right? Theres nothing wrong with that. Come on. (They get up and go over to the table where his colleagues are sitting.) Burt? Lydia? Mel? This is Elizabeth.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Okay, you have to switch with me! Monica is driving me crazy!
Liam: You dont say! (We see Ross who is hopping about with the ball and spikes it in his face.)
Ross: (laughs) Move in with me.
(Ross proceeds to apply copious amounts of the lotion on his legs. He literally starts spraying the back of his legs with the lotion, and as he applies some to his butt he makes a happy face like he enjoyed that sensation. After using about half the bottle he again tries to pull up his pants, but at the first sign of resistance, his hand slips off of the pants and hits him in the forehead.)
Rachel: Would you stop?! What is the matter with you?!
Rachel: (thinking) Hmm maybe it starts with how she gets pregnant.
Chandler: Mom. Thanks for wearing something. (They hug.) (Shes wearing a tight dress with a lot of cleavage showing.)
Phoebe: Umm, Im a masseuse by day. (Stands with her hands on her hips like a Supergirl pose.)
Chandler: All right look, if youre not gonna stay for me, then at least stay for them! Okay, they have had a very difficult year! What with the robbery and all!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is hosting an impromptu roundtable discussion with Stephanie, Karin, and Meg about Rosss three divorces.]
Aurora: Don't worry. I imagine he'd be okay with you because really, he's okay with Ethan.
Ross: Theres no or in mind. What is wrong with these pants?!!
Ross: Now, I know you wanted to bond with my dad, but did you really have to bond to that part?
Monica: What I said was, was that I understood. Joeys the one who agreed with you!
Monica: Well, uh yknow, our guy works with Chandler and hes really nice and smart and hes a great dresser!
Joey: Over there! (Points to the couch) Before, with the bills! You tried to give some charity, I said "No," you dropped it. Okay? Then we had a nice last night together, we had some fun, we gambled, nobody tried to give anybody any money! Now out of the blue, you start with the charity thing again!
Phoebe: Yes, I I am with child. (Flash) And I didnt want to say anything because its your day; I didnt want to steal your thunder.
Chandler: Yes, it does bother me! And I think it would bother a lot of people. Rachel, when you were going out with Ross, did it bother you when he flirted with other women?
Rachel: Well, now, wait. Now Im all freaked out. Come on, you guys will watch it with me.
Joey: What, are you crazy? When a blind man gets his sight back, does he walk around like this? (Joey closes his eyes and walks around with arms spread.)
RACH: Oh, no, Michael, it's not you. I'm sorry, it's just, it's this thing. It's probably not as bad as it sounds but this friend of mine is, is getting a cat with his girlfriend.
Ross: Please, please stay with me. I am so in love with you. Please, don't go.
Chandler: (to his co-workers) What is with him?
Chandler: Rachel, I love you! Deal with me first! (she leaves)
Monica: What about the second minister we meet with? I kinda liked him.
Ross: Well I dont know, but how-how great would that be huh? You living in my building. I could help take care of the baby. I can come over whenever I want. (Rachel looks at him.) With your permission.
Joey: I mean, she should be with someone like... Ross! You know what I mean, he uses all those big words too! Man, smart people are dull!
Chandler: (entering, with a goatee) Hey.
Monica: I knew you were not okay with that.
Charlie: Ah, well, unless it's the creepy guy with his hand up his kilt, I'm gonna say congratulations!
Rachel: Well, well I can up with it!
MRS GREEN: The only man I've ever been with is your father.
Rachel: Not working with me, Joe! Here's the thing: lately I have been having thoughts (pauses) musings, if you will!
Joey: Like the three musketeers, only with fruit.
Phoebe: No he wont. And thats not even the point! Monica, I made a whole speech about you do not cancel plans with friends! And now yknow what? Just because, potentially, the love of my life comes back from Russia just for one night, I-I should change my beliefs?! I should change beliefs! No! No! No, if I dont have my principles, I dont have anything!
Chandler: Oh, yknow what, that might be okay even if it was just kind of a fling, that might be all right with Rachel.
Joanna: With them, under them, whats the difference? Eh, Rach?
[Scene: Airport. Madonna's Take A Bow plays in the background as Rachel waits at the gate with flowers.]
Phoebe: Personal shopping? What is that? Like where you walk around with snooty rich people and tell them what to buy?
Phoebe: You know, I might know somebody. Hey, how about you set me up with someone, and we double date!
Chandler: It was pretty simple actually, I came up with a couple of cost-cutting solutions, wrote out a list and Monica told me to go to hell.
Ross: And Im sure youre gonna make a big impression. Hi! Im Rachel Green. Its nice to meet you. (He lifts his leg and imitates shaking hands with it, just like how Rachel was trying to pick up the aspirin with her feet.) Come on, you probably have a broken rib!
Phoebe: Well, I heard youre having a problem with one of the boys in your class. And so I thought I would just come down here and sit you both down, have a little talk and make it all okay. Now umm, the boys name is Stings son.
Joey: You, you want me to help you with that?
The Director: Kate Millers awkward and mannered portrayal is laughable. (Kate walks away depressed.) Badda-badda-badda. Ah-ha! Here it is! The direction by Marshal Talmant is (stops, reads it again, and throws down the paper in disgust) Thank you, boys and girls, youve ruined my life. Please, stuff your talentless faces with my Mothers crab cakes! (starts to leave) Excuse me!!
ROSS: Ok, then you're gonna have to understand that you're with a guy who's not gonna stop planning his future with you because he knows that we're gonna end up together and if that scares you, tough, 'cause you're gonna have to deal with that.
ROSS: It's just, it's, it's me. You, you know I've only been with one woman my whole life and she turned out to be a lesbian. So now I've got myself all psyched out, you know, and it's become, like this, this thing and I. . . Well, you just must think I'm weird.
Chandler: (entering with Rachel) Im telling ya, Joannas got it all wrong. Okay? All I said was, This was fun. Lets do it again sometime. Ill give you a call.
Earl: No! Thats just the "Hey Guy" guy. He says that to everybody! Hes the worst! Id like to take him with me!
Phoebe: HEY! Mike called were going out again! YAY! YAY! (She dances around with happiness)
Phoebe: Oh can I? Vegetarians never get to do the wishbone. It's really not fair either! You know, just because we don't eat the meat doesn't mean we don't like to play with the carcasses!
Joey: Now, dont argue with me
Monica: For your information, ass munch, I've lost four pounds. Maybe even five with all the dancing. (A guy enters holding a pizza box)
Ross: Enough with geography for the insane, okay? Lets play some ball, guys.
Ross: Well, then, I think, I think the guy is scum. I hate him. I mean I actuallyI-I physically hate him. I always have. You are way too good to be with a guy like that.
Monica: Oh no, she's out having drinks with Carl.
Ross: Is that why in junior high you were the only one that hung out with that Ukrainian kid?
Joanna: No-ho-ho! (pause) Yeah. (pause) I mean, no-no-no-no-no, dont you worry, Im sure with your qualifications you wont need to sleep with some guy to get that job. Although, I might need some convincing.
Ross: At least I know she's not going out with me to get into R rated movies.
Janice: We got the proofs back from that photo shoot, you know, the one with the little vegetables. Anyway, they pretty much sucked, so, I blew off the rest of the day, and I went shopping...(looks through her bags)... and I got you, I'm looking, I'm looking, I'm looking, I got you...
Rachel: Well, I just lost a job, and I'd like to raise the bet five bucks. Does anybody have a problem with that?
JOEY: You partied with Hootie and the Blowfish?
RACHEL: Oh, I'm sorry. You know what? I cannot have this conversation with you. I mean, god, you just come in here, and drop this bomb on me, before you even tell Daddy. What? What do you want? Do you want my blessing?
Phoebe: You guys, you know what I just realized? 'Joker' is 'poker' with a 'J.' Coincidence?
(Chandler tries to save face and makes the 'OK' sign with his hands, while obviously unable to breathe.)
Kathy: Chandler, I like Joey a lot, but with you
(Ross leaps out of his chair and runs out the door, with Chandler in hot pursuit.)
Joey: Oh sure, go with the sissy.
Monica: Well, if you want, you can stay with Rachel and me tonight.
Chandler: Oh no problem, maybe Ill play with my left hand.
Rachel: (Running back out the door with her passport.) Bye, Pheebs.
Monica: (entering with Chandler) Hey!
Monica: (starting to get up) I gotta go water Pete's plants. (stops) Y'know what, if he's gonna break up with me, maybe I won't water his plants.
Big Nosed Rachel: Y'know what? I've just had it with high school boys! They are just silly. (Ross is overhearing this.) Silly, stupid boys! I'm going to start dating men!
Rachel: Noooo... the interview! She loved me! She absolutely loved me. We talked for like two and a half hours, we have the same taste in clothes, andoh, I went to camp with her cousin... And, oh, the job is perfect. I can do this. I can do this well!
Ross: Okay, Im sorry, this is insane! I-I-Im not addicted to heroin, Im not gay, and there is no problem with my ability to consummate anything! Look, Ill consummate this marriage right here, right now!
Joey: No-no-no I've seen it happen, you-you get a rapport going with a woman but somehow you manage to kill it. What's your secret?
Joey: I would sooner die in this hellhole then see her back with you!
(Phoebe screams in pain, and Frank screams with her.)
Ross: Why, does it look like Im having trouble with my misshapen claw? (He hands Joey the form)
Ross: So, uh, this guy, she used to go out with, is, uh is he a good guy?
Phoebe: Ugh, what's right with them?
Joey: No-no, things ah, finally happened with Kate.
Rachel: Okay. Well be careful with her, shes really tiny.
Ross: (with a mouthful) That's not bad.
[Pete enters with his entourage all pumped up, and Ross and Monica are the only ones who stand up and cheer.]
Monica: I know! I know! I am a terrible person! I mean, Chandler is never going to trust me with anything ever again!
Conan: You uh, youve worked withThey always say a performer should never work with pets or children.
Chandler: (entering, with Janice in tow) Hello!
Ross: Give daddy the Barbi! Ben, give, give me the Barbi. Okay, how 'bout, don't you want to play with the monster truck? (makes a monster truck sound) No. Okay, oh, oh, how about a Dino-soilder? (squawks like a dinosaur)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, and Rachel are there, as Phoebe enters with her date.]
Monica: Wait, was this a-a small mediterranean guy with curiously intelligent good looks?
Phoebe: That won't go with this dress though.
Joey: Then you gotta come clean with Ma! This is not right!
(Chandler silently pleads with Joey to cover for them.)
Phoebe: No way! No way! You just broke with Tag a week ago.
Joey: No ... the leather sticks to my ass. You know, this isn't fair. What makes you think that I'm just gonna sleep with her and then blow her off? Huh? Can't you guys open your minds to the possibility that I actally like her, and might want something real? (pause) Look, the truth is, I haven't felt this way about anyone since Rachel, ok? I didn't think I could ever love again.
Chandler: Hey honey, you got the kind with the little girl, you said we were gonna to get the kind with the baby.
Rachel: Do you really not know where Im going with this? (Phoebe nods, "No.") It left! Its one huge room!
The Teacher: Excuse me. Can, can I help you with something?
Joey: When I'm with a woman, I need to know that I'm going out with more people than she is.