words in movies
JOEY: I can't believe it's Christmas already. Ya know, I mean, one day your eatin' turkey, the next thing ya know, your lords are a-leapin' and you geese are a-layin'.
ROSS: How 'bout from now on we just call it the 'unfortunate incident'? [Rachel walks off] Hey Gunther, you got stairs in your place?
RACHEL: Phoebe, I thought your dad was in prison.
GRANDMOTHER: Is it really your fa--I can't... well of course it is.
GRANDMOTHER: Alright, that is not your father, that's just a picture of a guy in a frame.
GRANDMOTHER: It was your mother's idea. Ya know, she didn't want you to know your real father because it hurt her so much when he left, and, I didn't want to go along with it, but, well then she died and, and it was harder to argue with her. Not impossible, but harder.
MONICA: You guys haven't gotten your presents yet? Tomorrow's Christmas Eve, what're ya gonna do?
RACHEL: Oh, by the way Mon, I don't think the mailman liked your cookies. Here are the ornaments your mom sent. [hands her a smashed box]
ROSS: Hey, Rach, you know what? I think, I think I know what'll make you feel better. How 'bout you make a list about me. RACHEL: Wha... forget it Ross, no, I am not gonna stand here and make a list of. . . ROSS: C'mon Rachel. RACHEL: OK, you're whiney, you are, you're obsessive, you are insecure, you're, you're gutless, you know, you don't ever, you don't just sort of seize the day, you know. You like me for what, a year, you didn't do anything about it. And, uh, oh, you wear too much of that gel in your hair. ROSS: See there, you uhh, alright, ya, you did what I said. RACHEL: Yeah, and you know what? You're right, I do feel better, thank you Ross. [she walks off and Ross puts his hand to his hair] [Scene: Back at Phoebe's. She is on the phone] PHOEBE: Yeah, um, in Albany, can I have the number of Frank Buffay. . . OK, um, in Ithica. . . alright, um, Saratoga. . . Oneonta. Alright, you know what, you shouldn't call youself information. [hangs up] [Phoebe's grandmother enters] GRANDMOTHER: Hey. PHOEBE: Hello grandma, if that is in fact your real name. GRANDMOTHER: C'mon now Phoe, don't still be mad at me. How's it going? PHOEBE: Well, not so good. Upstate's pretty big, he's pretty small, you do the math. GRANDMOTHER: Well, I think you're better off without him. Oh honey, I know he's your daddy but, but to me he's still the irresponsible creep who knocked up your mom and stole her Gremlin. PHOEBE: No I just, just wanted to know who he was, ya know. GRANDMOTHER: I know. OK, I wasn't completely honest with you when I told you that, uh, I didn't know exactly where he lived. PHOEBE: Whattaya mean? GRANDMOTHER: He lives at 74 Laurel Drive in Middletown. If you hit the Dairy Queen, you've gone too far. You can take my cab. PHOEBE: Wow. Thank you. GRANDMOTHER: Now, remember, nobody else drives that cab. PHOEBE: Uh-huh, got it. Ooh, I'm gonna see my dad. Wish me luck, Grandpa! [blows a kiss to a picture of Einstein]
ROSS: Oh, oh that's right, I forgot about your ability to fuse metal.
RACHEL: [answers door] Hi, welcome to our tropical Christmas party. You can put your coats and sweaters and pants and shirts in the bedroom.
ROSS: Monica, Monica, your guest are turning into jerky, OK.
ROSS: Alright, alright, here's the chance. Monica give him cash, Rachel give him your earrings. Something, now, anything. MONICA: No, I will not cave. RACHEL: Yeah, I'm with Mon. ROSS: Alright, alright, you know how you say I never seize the day? Well, alright, even though he's your super, I'm seizing. [approaches Mr. Treeger] Mr. Treeger, here is 50 bucks, merry Christmas. [Gives him the cash.]
ROSS: No no, no, that, that's your Christmas tip, alright. Oh, hey, do you think there's a chance you could fix that radiator now?
PHOEBE: You guys. I'm sorry about your shopping.
CHANDLER: OK, Phoebs, your turn.
JOEY: They're ribbed for your pleasure. [Ross and Monica trade their gifts.]
Phoebe: Oh-oh, thats your thing.
Monica: (handing him a pad of paper and a pen) Lets just do it right now. Okay? It wont be hard. Just say whats in your heart. (She goes back, sits down, and starts feverishly writing.)
Phoebe: Yes you do! This is your third divorce! You love divorce so much youre probably gonna marry it! Then it wont work out and youre gonna have to divorce it, divorcing guy. (Pause) Im so drunk.
Phoebe: I got it for your wedding and I ordered it weeks ago, and it finally got here!
Fat Monica: Yeah, yeah, and you were going him y'know, your flower.
The Cigarette Smoking Guy: (No, not the Cigarette Smoking Man from The X-Files.) Well, maybe you and your baby should go to another strip club.
Ross: So, you gals wanna hand over your money now? That way, we don't have to go through the formality of actually playing.
Rachel: Hey, can I borrow the key to your house so I can run across the street and make a copy?
Rachel: You are asking me to be your wife!
Monica: Fine, you can have the bath, but I am taking your boat. Now youre just a girl in a tub!
Monica: How she drove you crazy, picking on every little detail, like your hair... for example.
Ross: Joey, the guys your best friend.
Monica: Everybody get your toys! (They all run toward the table with toys)
Chandler: The front page? You really do live in your own little world, dont ya?
Phoebe: Why would you leave your Belgian waffle in the hall?
Rachel: Hey, now wait a minute! I get when you told people at first that you wanted to be an actor they laughed at you! Now come on Bobby, why dont you tell us a little bit about your band?
Joey: Oh what? Like your Mr. Cop!
Emily: I wish I could know if youd heard any of that. I suppose Ive either just told you I love you or given my neighbours a good laugh. Mrs. Newman if youre listening, bugger off this in none of your business. I suppose theres not much chance you did heard that, and theres the call waiting so, I should go. Oh well. (Answers the call waiting.) Hello.
Ross: Yeah, um, I don't know if you noticed, but he had a lot to drink, and you know how he gets when he's drun..uh... (He has caught sight of Joey scowling at him) I can't do this, I did it, it was me, I'm sorry, I kissed your mom.
Phoebe: Me taking care of you is no problem, huh? You guys feel safe. Right? Okay, Im gonna take that spit bubble as, "Yeah, I do!" Okay, after I get rid of this dirty diaper Leslie, Ill set you up with a clean one. (She throws it at the garbage without looking, misses, and knocks over a vase and flowers, which fall to the floor and break.) Okay, Im sorry. I didnt mean to scare you. I just have to clean that up. Okay? Cause lets face it, were at Monicas. (She crawls over, disposes of the diaper, picks up the flowers, and the vase.) I broke it. All right. Well, thats just the way that goes. (She throws out both the flowers and the vase.) Okay, good. (She turns around and only counts two babies.) Why are there only two of you? Where is Leslie? Well, you cant answer. (She starts looking for her) Leslie? Where are you Leslie? Leslie, now would be a good time for your first words! (She turns around and finds that Leslie has managed to crawl into the bottom drawer of the TV cabinet.) Well, look at you! Hey! You are a little bit mischievous! My gosh! (She picks her up and notices a surprise is waiting in the drawer.) Oh, youre a lot mischievous! Well, itll dry. (Closes the drawer with her foot.) (To Leslie) Okay, you sit with your brother and sister nowwho arent there! (They both have disappeared as well.)
Phoebe: I, I have to go before I put your head through a wall. (she leaves)
Mr. Geller: Honey, relationships are hard. Like with your Mom and me. You know after we graduated college we broke up for a while. It seems her Father, your Grandfather, wanted her to travel around Europe, like he did. Of course, he got to do it on Uncle Sam's nickel, because he was also strafing German troop trains at the time. However, (turns around and sees that Monica is sleeping and puts a blanket around her, kisses her, picks up the cigar, and starts watching the video)
Joey: Okay, all right, whew! What do you say we all clear out of here and let these two lovebirds get back down to business? (Ross turns and glares at him.) Hey-hey-hey, I-I-I'm just talking here, he-he's the one doing your sister.
The Director: Hang on a minute! Joey, you keep touching your face. Is something wrong?
Lowell: Yup, and waaay out of your league. (Exits)
Rachel: Umm, you-you and your sister seem to have umm, a very special bond, and
Phoebe: You know what Amanda said to me when she got me on the phone? (apes Amanda in a british accent) "Oh, so sorry to catch you on your Mo-Bile!" If-if you don't wanna get me on my mo-Bile, don't call me on my mo-Bile!"
Rachel/Ross: Ooh, your lips are so soft... Do that again... (and she/he moves in for another kiss. Joey, pushes her head away again...)
RACHEL: Uhh, I mean this is like reading about my own life. I mean this book could have been called 'Be Your Own Windkeeper Rachel'.
Chandler: (Picking up a pillow.) Yeah, is this your pretty pink pillow on the couch?
Chandler: Hows your room Rach?
Phoebe: Well, look, why dont you just, why dont you do your Phase Two strip club thing with us.
Frank: Uh, Delaware. She's on her way though, so until she gets here, I'm gonna be your coach. But don't worry, she told me all about the la-Mazada stuff.
CHANDLER: No-no, I mean what, what's this about your new place?
Joey: (Checks to see if shes drooling on his shirt.) Okay. Okay, okay, hey. (Lays her down and covers her with a blanket.) There we go, lets get your feet up there. (Looks at her) Good night, Kate. Sweet dreams. (Picks up a garbage can) Im gonna put this can right here in case you have to hurl.
Phoebe: Give her a break, it's hard being on your own for the first time.
Rachel: I think, if it was a little colder in here I could see your nipples through that sweater.
Monica: Your favorite!
Carol: (running over and grabbing the phone away from Ross) (on phone) Phoebe, hang on a second. (Hands Ross her keys) Here, take my car, go pick up your friends.
Chandler: That's a relatively open weave and I can still see your... nipular areas.
Chandler: I know. Can you believe it? One year ago today I was just your annoying friend Chandler.
The Interviewer: Okay, how about when youre not working. What do you do in your spare time?
Monica: It will be my pleasure. (to Phoebe) My guy has diplomatic coupons. Your guy cant even say coupons. (they leave)
Phoebe: Oh thats good, I guess shell have a choice between my guy and your weirdo.
Stage Director: Well, here's your phone doctor. (She walks away.)
Monica: (To Chandler) Do you want our guy to be your guy?
Rachel: Jealous of what? Of your lack of responsiblity? You, your immaturity? Your total disregard of other people's feelings?
Elizabeth: Making out in your office.
Monica: Oh look, the pool tables free. Rack em up. Ill be back in just a minute. Get ready for me to whip your butt.
Rachel: Yeah. So yknow, I have all of these feelings and I dont know what to do about them, because I cant date like a normal person, which is fine because I dont need a relationship, I mean all I really want is one great night. Just sex, yknow? No strings attached, no relationship, just with someone that I feel comfortable with and who knows what hes doing. For just one great night, I mean is that really so hard to find. (Looks at Joey.) So how was your day?
Woman: (walking up) I love your car.
Rachel: Hmm. Look, Ross, if you want your neighbors to like you, why don't you just pay the hundred bucks? The party's gonna cost you way more than that.
Phoebe: Im so, so, so sorry, Joey. I definitely am gonna see youre play. I swear youre play is very important to us, thank you for your patience. Youre play is the next play is the next play Im gonna see.
Monica: That's your call.
Phoebe: What is your job?
Monica: Then all your stuff would be here.
Monica: Maybe because you used to be aloof, or that youre really sarcastic, or that, yknow, you joke around all the time. Or that you take off your clothes and throw them on the couch.
Rachel: Yeah thats great. But first, wait, talk to me, talk to me. Tell me about your day.
Answering Machine: Your messages have been erased.
Ross: Its your turn.
MONICA: Chandler look, I don't want to be one of those wives who says, "You can't go to the game.� You have to spend time with me."� So, if you could just realize it on your own . . .
Joey: No dude, you gotta hold your breath until youre ready to answer the question.
Phoebe: Yeah. Salt, so your life always has flavor.
Ronni: Oh, uh, well, you left your good hair at my apartment, I figured you'd need it tomorrow for your meeting. (Hands him the hair)
Chandler: It was working until you showed up, you big tree! I mean, this isnt fair. You had your chance with her! You had your chance and you blew it! And this is my chance and I am not going to blow it because we are meant for each other! And this is all just been one stupid mistake! (Sits down heavily.) I was gonna propose tonight.
COMMERCIAL VOICEOVER: Can't get the monkey off your back? Then put it in your mouth...
Rachel: Honey, its so sweet that you want me to stay, but I-I cant do that to you. I mean it would disrupt your entire life.
Joey: He's planning your birthday party.
Phoebe: Yeah... Ogh... Okay, fine. You made your point. Can you please just be Mike Hannigan again?
MONICA: Really Phoebs? Because, you know, you'd have to be an actual waitress. This can't be like your 'I can be a bear cub' thing.
Monica: Were going to Las Vegas to see your dad. Its time you two talked, and I want to get to know my father-in-law.
Rachel: I cant let him go out that way, hes got a meeting. (To Ross) Youve got something here on your back.
Ross: Okay, well be right in. (to Chandler) So ah, did your boss try to slap you again today?
Phoebe: Have you seen your guys body?
Ross: I dont think charging new clothes too your dad qualifies as making it on your own.
PHOEBE: Yeah. Oh, except one of the strings on my guitar is broken. Hey, Chandler, can I borrow your G-string?
Chandler: Thank you for writing your book. Its-its uh, great book and you are the queen of everything.
Monica: When Mom and Dad drove you to the hospital to get your nose fixed, I swam into the lake and fished it out.
Ross: Rachel, this is your apartment.
Phoebe: If you dont sail your boat, what do you do on it?
Paula: Listen. As someone who's seen more than her fair share of bad beef, I'll tell you: that is not such a terrible thing. I mean, they're your friends, they're just looking out after you.
Gunther: What did I tell you about talking to your friends while youre working?
Monica: Now, open your eyes.
Monica: Have you found your dress yet?
Mona: I love your place! Where is this guy from? (A statue from the top of his apothecary table.)
Terry: Joey Tribbiani! Im surprised your big head could fit through our small halls! (Gets up) I gotta go Joey.
Phoebe: Hey, why are you mopping your ceiling?
Phoebe: It is your office.
Megan: So uh, whos your photographer?
Rachel: And so were-were you close to your parents?
Monica: Hey! Continuing the countdown of your favorite meals. Tonight, No. 3, macaroni and cheese with cut up hot dogs.
CHANDLER: I'm sorry we, we don't have your sheep.
Phoebe: Oh, Ross, Mon, is it okay if I bring someone to your parents anniversary party?
Phoebe: It does! How would you feel if you couldnt share your cooking? Or-or imagine how Ross would feel if he couldnt teach us about dragons.
Chandler: You took off your pants and climbed under the sheets!
ROSS: I just wanna thank you for being there for me today. And I'm sorry I,I almost broke your hand.
Mr. Waltham: You spend half your life in the bathroom, why dont you ever go out the bloody window!
Frank: Oh well, um, your, your laundry just smelled so good, that I thought Id curl up in it. Is that all right?
Ross: Yeah, I mean... I think when it's your shot, y'know, you-you know it's your shot. Did it... feel like your shot..?
Rachel: Okay. (they both look into the camera, and Ross waves.) Hi Emma. Well, your first birthday is over, and it was really...